by Karina Bliss
Belle stopped smiling; Matt squeezed her shoulder. “I’ll go,” he offered.
“Sam seems pretty cut up,” said Pip tentatively. “Do you know if there’s any hope of reconciliation with his wife?”
The other woman stiffened. “Did Dad send you here to ask me that?”
Dad. “I didn’t know you were his daughter,” said Pip. Making friends came to her as naturally as breathing, but this family gathering was proving an emotional minefield, chiefly because Joe had told her nothing about ongoing family dramas. “If I’ve come across as intrusive I’m sorry.”
“No, I’m sorry.” Belle touched Pip’s arm in apology. “I’ve recently stopped being my parents’ go-between—they need to work this out themselves—but Dad’s not above subterfuge.”
They watched Matt go up to Sam and exchange a few words. The two men went outside. Sam’s drink stayed on the bar. “Matt’s probably taken Dad out to see his new car,” said Belle, “which I’m sure Dad will tell him he paid too much for.”
Turning back to Pip, she added awkwardly, “Dad’s not usually a heavy drinker, but he’s taking the separation hard.”
“That’s okay.”
Belle raked a hand through her springy blond curls, her blue eyes rueful. “Except that Joe so wanted us to make a good impression.”
“He did?” For a moment, Pip’s heart lifted, before she remembered Joe was doing this for their unborn child, not her.
A baby-free Sue joined them, lifting her wineglass. “It’s so great to meet you, Pip.” The three women clinked glasses.
“I’m surprised you prefer Dad’s concoction over Joe’s wine,” commented Belle. “Especially when he had a hand in making this zinfandel.” She rolled the red wine around her glass, then sniffed appreciatively before taking a sip.
“He did?” Pip asked. She was starting to sound like a parrot. “I knew Joe was a wine buff, but not that his interest ran this deep.”
“He and his Napa vineyard buddy, Scott, experiment with a dozen bottles every year,” said Sue. “Joe was studying to be a winemaker at Fresno State when he met Nadia. Of course, the pregnancy changed everything for them.”
Pip’s throat tightened and she took a long sip of her iced tea to loosen it. “Pregnancy seems to do that,” she murmured.
At lunch, Pip sat between the Fraser men and opposite Belle, Sue and their partners, who definitely fit the mold of charming Californians. Rick was also in education, which made conversation easy, while Matt quizzed her on surf spots in New Zealand.
Both men so obviously adored their women that by the time they’d finished their entrées Pip could have laid her head on the table and cried. She and Joe weren’t making progress, not compared to the real thing.
He was still a closed book, double padlocked and booby-trapped. No girls allowed. It amazed her that Joe even had a close female friend.
But then someone as serene and self-contained as Sue wouldn’t dream of trying to pick his locks. Feeling pintsize and pugnacious, Pip sipped her iced tea and brooded.
Joe turned from a conversation with Kaitlin, who sat on his right. “You okay?”
“I didn’t know you wanted to be a winemaker.”
Immediately his expression closed. “I gave up on that dream a long time ago.”
“Sue said you’ve been considering going back to it.”
“I was, but what with Adam and other things—” his gaze took in her stomach “—it’s not realistic.”
“Well, if there’s any other dream I can crush, please tell me,” she said tartly.
“Pip, I didn’t mean it like that.”
Shoving back her chair, she stood up, gripping the table to counter a slight dizziness. “That was delicious,” she said to Sue. “Shall we get dessert?”
The other woman looked a little taken aback by her heartiness, but smiling, she also stood. “Sure.”
Standing at the buffet, it occurred to Pip that Sue could offer insights into Joe’s character. “Were you two really as close as Joe says you were all those years ago?” He was probably exaggerating, like he’d exaggerated his happy family.
Sue shot her a look. “Well, it was before we knew we were cousins.”
Pip went to pick up a dessert plate, then realized she was still holding her glass. Draining it, she plonked it down next to the vanilla ice cream. “I need to know more about the heartless trollop who soured him for future relationships.”
Sue’s face went white, then red. “He got over her,” she said.
“The woman, yes.” Recklessly, Pip helped herself to both types of pie. “Let’s face it, most of us shudder recalling our first loves, but hit some guys at a vulnerable age and they never come out of their shell again. Joe’s a classic case.” Pip became aware that she was talking way too loudly and speaking way too frankly to someone who was essentially a stranger.
Part of her wondered at that.
Sue opened her mouth, but nothing emerged. Come to think of it, even the ambient noise had fallen away. Pip turned back to the table. No one was eating. Everyone was staring at her in varying degrees of discomfort and amusement. Joe’s eyes blazed.
“Any other of my emotional defects you want to share with my family?” he inquired in a tone like chipped ice.
“Well, it’s true,” she said defiantly. Whoa, shouldn’t she be embarrassed by this? Pip prodded her feelings. Nope, still defiant. “You let some bimbo in high school ruin you for other women. Isn’t that right, Nadia?”
Looking at her, Pip was buoyed by an unexplained rush of affection. Nadia—her sister in misfortune, someone else who’d suffered through loving Joe bloody Fraser.
Nadia shook her head in small jerks, then her brown eyes shifted to Sue.
Recent comments coalesced in Pip’s brain.
Doug’s aside that Nadia was “still intimidated by Sue” and his speculative “You don’t know?”
Joe’s expressionless “Nadia was jealous over my friendship with Sue.”
And finally Sue’s embarrassed “It was before we knew we were cousins.”
“Oh, hell,” said Pip. The truth was very different to the one her overwrought imagination had conjured. And so much more complicated.
Awkwardly, she faced the other woman. “Sue, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know it was you.”
“And now my whole family does.” Sue swallowed. “Trying to find a bright side, at least I’d already told Rick and my parents.”
Pip glanced at the shocked faces around the table, winced and closed her eyes. “Well, they say that the more secrets a family has, the more dysfunctional it is.” Her small laugh lacked conviction. “I’ve just made you all less…” She trailed off.
“Have you been drinking?” Joe demanded.
Incensed, she opened her eyes. “Of course not. How could you suggest such a thing when I’m…I’m on a diet?” Everyone looked at her plate, piled high with apple and pumpkin pie.
“Didn’t you have one of Dad’s Long Island iced teas?” ventured Belle.
“Yes, but I spefic…specifically asked for nonalcoholic.” Pip glanced at Sam for confirmation, but his gaze shied away.
“One wasn’t going to hurt her.”
Joe strode over, picked up her empty glass and sniffed. “How can you not taste alcohol in one of those things?”
“I thought it was the bitters.” Pip tried not to panic, but her hand fluttered over her stomach. “So what are we talking about here? A splash of gin?
“And vodka,” he snapped. “And tequila and rum.”
“Excuse me,” said Pip weakly, and hurried to the bathroom, breaking into a run as soon as she was out of sight.
Bending over the toilet bowl, she jammed a finger down her throat and forced herself to throw up until her stomach was empty. Fear and self-disgust made the task easy.
Tears filled her eyes. She really had to stop throwing up in strange bathrooms. With a shaky hand, she wiped her mouth with toilet tissue. Surely one drink, even a strong one,
wasn’t enough to harm the baby?
The tears started to fall. She didn’t know that for sure because she didn’t know anything about babies. Like she didn’t know anything about Joe’s family or what really mattered to him.
A sob convulsed her as she dropped the tissue in the toilet and flushed. In fact, she was so stupid she couldn’t even distinguish an alcoholic iced tea from a nonalcoholic one. If she couldn’t look after her baby in the uterus, what on earth was she going to do when it arrived? Pip slid down the stall door and wept.
There was a heavy-knuckled tap on the restroom door, then Joe’s anxious voice called, “Pip, you okay?”
He’d never seen her cry and he never would. She rubbed her eyes dry with the sleeve of her angora knit. The tears glistened dewlike in the brushed cherry wool. “Go back to your guests. I’ll be out in a minute.”
Pip waited until she heard him leave before coming out of the cubicle. At the sink she rinsed her mouth and eyes, then, hearing murmured conversation, opened the ladies’ room door a crack. Joe and Sue were in the corridor, talking quietly. Pip closed the door again. She couldn’t face Sue, she just couldn’t. What must the other woman think of her?
Upending the trash can under the restroom’s window, she climbed onto it and hoisted herself to the sill, where she sat gauging the distance to the ground. It was five, maybe six feet down, an easy jump. Unless you were pregnant.
As Pip hesitated, Daniel came around the corner of the building, car keys swinging in his hand. He stopped. “Looks like I’m not the only one making a getaway.”
“Despite all evidence to the contrary,” she replied with great dignity, “I’m a very sensible person, a shaper of young minds, a respected teacher. Meeting your nephew has made me an idiot. Can you help me down, please?”
He shook his head. “I don’t get involved in family dramas.”
“I’m not family.”
Sighing, he raised his arms and she dropped into them.
“Thank you. Would you—”
“No. I’m not giving you a lift anywhere. What loyalties I do have are to Joe, which is why I think you should go back in there. He’s worried about you.”
“It’s not me he’s concerned about, it’s the—” Pip stopped herself in time. “Have you ever been in love?” she asked miserably.
“Nearly,” said Daniel. “Fortunately, I pulled back in time.”
She frowned. “You and Joe are so alike. And that’s not a compliment, Red.”
He smiled, a real smile, and became a very attractive man. “I’ll ignore that because your momentary death wish will pass. And, no offense, but you don’t make putting your heart on the line look very appealing.”
She smiled weakly at that. “No, I don’t, do I?”
“You want to go back inside now?”
“No.” She took her cell phone out of her pants pocket. “I’m going to walk a couple of blocks, then call a cab.” Her bag was still inside, but she had money at home.
Five minutes later, as she marched along the highway, a four-wheel drive pulled in front of her. Daniel reached over and opened the passenger door. “Hop in.”
“I don’t want to cause you trouble with Joe.”
“I’ll be into more trouble if I abandon you in this neighborhood. Now get in.”
One look at his aggravated expression and Pip did as she was told.
Daniel surveyed her through narrowed eyes. “I want no tears, no confidences…in fact, after you’ve told me your address, no talking. I’m not getting involved.”
“Joe was right,” said Pip. “You can be charming when you want to be.”
One corner of his mouth lifted. “Seat belt,” he growled.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
“IT’S NOT TRUE,” Joe said quietly to Sue as they waited outside the bathroom. She’d joined him a couple of minutes earlier, thinking Pip might need more than his reassurances that his family didn’t hate her. “You didn’t ruin me for other women.”
“No,” she agreed. “I was only an excuse.”
Joe tore his gaze away from the door and stared at her. “What the hell’s that supposed to mean?”
“You were already in the shell, Joe.” Usually so affectionate and accepting, he read an uncomfortable challenge in her dark brown eyes. “You’ll have to come out if you want to keep her.”
Women. “You have no idea how complicated things are.” Pip needed him. Joe mustered his patience and banked his righteous anger for later.
“Actually,” said his cousin, “with the right person, things are pretty simple.”
But his attention swung back to the door. Joe wasn’t listening. “She’s taking too long. I’m going in there.” He started forward, but Sue caught him by the arm.
“Pip will come out when she’s ready. Maybe it’s better if we give her some space instead of hovering.”
Reluctantly, he allowed himself to be steered back to the table, where the rest of the family had abandoned dessert and stood talking. Except one, Joe noticed. “Where’s Daniel?”
“He remembered an urgent appointment.” Belle’s tone was uncharacteristically sarcastic.
“How’s Pip?” said Aunt Emily.
Joe glared at Uncle Sam. “Throwing up.”
“Well, that’s all we need!” Sam rolled his eyes. “A bulimic in the family.”
In two strides, Joe stood over his uncle. “You damn fool, she’s not bulimic, she’s pregnant.” It took every ounce of self-control not to hit him. “What the hell were you thinking, palming off alcohol?”
“Pregnant!” Nadia was the first to react. “How could you be so irresponsible twice?”
Joe thought there wasn’t a spare inch of psyche he hadn’t already flayed raw, but his ex-wife found one.
Sam looked genuinely shocked. “But I asked her if she was pregnant and she denied it.”
“Because we’re keeping it a secret, you moron!” Joe roared.
The absurdity of that remark brought him back to his senses. He looked around at his relatives, all displaying varying degrees of amazement, and sighed heavily. “At this rate we’re going to be the least dysfunctional family in the entire country.”
Smiles broke out, handshakes. “Congratulations!” Belle gave him a warm hug. Sue’s embrace was reassuring, but Nadia simply shook her head.
“We’ll talk later,” he promised.
Kaitlin danced around him. “I’m gonna have a baby sister or brother!” The enormity of his disclosure struck home. Oh, God, what had he done? His daughter tugged on his hand. “Does this mean you guys are gonna get married?”
“We’re talking about it, honey.” Joe tried to sound enthusiastic, but he was wondering how Pip was going to react when she heard he’d blabbed.
He had to tell her first. Suddenly aware that she was taking far too long, Joe turned toward the corridor.
Sam caught up with him. “Listen, I’m sorry.” His so-called uncle actually seemed humble. “I would never have given her alcohol had I known.”
Joe lengthened his stride. “Yeah, well, you can make your apologies to Pip.” She didn’t answer his rap on the door and he pushed it open. “Anyone here?” No answer. He checked all the stalls. They were empty. But she couldn’t have left through the restaurant.
Swaying in the breeze of an open window, the net curtains caught his attention. Joe narrowed his eyes. No, not even Pip…
His cell beeped an incoming text. Incredulous, Joe stared at Pip’s message: Dan’s taking me home. Please grovel on my behalf.
BETWEEN PLACATING HIS ex-wife, calming his excited daughter, dodging uncomfortable questions from his relatives and settling the bill, it was two hours later before Joe inserted his key in the lock of Pip’s apartment. Before turning the handle, he paused, gathering his composure. He didn’t want to yell at Pip. On further reflection he’d decided that part of this fiasco—a very small part—was his fault.
He should have warned her to be careful around Sam. Maybe mentioned that Su
e was the woman who’d sent him off the rails in high school. Still, Pip had no business—even under the influence—psychoanalyzing him.
On the drive home he’d phoned a doctor friend who’d confirmed what Joe already knew in the logical part of his brain. The baby would be fine.
“I know,” said Pip. “I made my own inquiries.”
Feet tucked under her, she reclined on the candy-striped couch next to her balcony window, almost lost in her fleecy bathrobe, her fair hair damp from a shower.
She’d sent him a cool “Hello” when he’d come in, and returned to her book, Pregnancy and You. The late-afternoon sun gilded her hair and skin and blazed white on the lambs marching around the hem of that ridiculous robe.
Joe had expected repentance. He’d expected Pip to be appalled by her actions. He’d come home magnanimously prepared to forgive and console her. “Tea?” he said through gritted teeth.
She inclined her head, as gracious as a queen. “Thank you.”
While he made hot drinks, Pip concentrated on her book. Through his irritation, Joe was acutely conscious of the fragrance of lavender soap and warm woman, and the curve of dark lashes over her smooth cheek. Only when he was stirring sugar into his coffee did he realize that she hadn’t turned a single page.
Some of his magnanimity came back.
As he handed her a mug of tea, he said brusquely, “I told them about your pregnancy.”
She turned the book upside down on her lap. “I guess you had to, given the circumstances.”
Joe wrestled with his conscience. “Actually, I hadn’t meant—”
“How did Kaitlin take it?”
“Excited…already choosing names.” Maybe it was better not to make his apology before she’d made hers.
Raising her mug, Pip paused, looking at him across the rim. “And Nadia?”
“Furious at both of us.” Joe sat down beside her. “She calmed down when I explained the circumstances.”
Without taking a sip, Pip placed her mug carefully on the gilt-and-beveled-glass coffee table. “And how many think I did it deliberately to get a green card?”
