“If she cared so much, where is she now?” Auska replied cruelly.
“I told her not to come. You are both too much alike, hot-headed and quick to cut with your words,” he grinned, “and fists.”
“We are nothing alike,” she shot back.
“Funny, she said the exact same thing with that exact tone.” His smile was warming and even a little infectious.
“What do you want Vincent? To reminisce? To change me into something I’m not? What? I’m not a little girl anymore who needs protecting. I’ll never be that person you two want me to be, it’s just not in me.”
“All I want is to keep a promise I once made to a man we all owe our lives to more than once,” he said solemnly.
The words cut deep, and Auska could feel the moisture forming around her eyes. “You kept it, you got me here, you saw me become an adult. Your conscience can be guilt-free from here on out. You know as well as I do that would have been more than enough for him.”
“But it’s not enough for me.”
“Then that’s on you, and you have no right to expect anything from me in that regard.”
“Why can’t you just let me in Auska?” Vincent said in frustration. “Why can’t you just let me be there for you, let me care about you? Talk to me, tell me what’s going on in that head of yours! Your thoughts, your feelings, dreams, goals, fears any of it! I just want to help. I just want to be a friend, someone you can rely on, a shoulder to cry on, someone you can confide in.”
Auska stood up straight. “You want to know why? Really know why?”
“Yes.”
“The more people you care about, the more people you let in, all just equals more pain and suffering when it’s all taken away and destroyed. I lost too much, saw too much, suffered too much as a naive young girl out there.” Her voice went bitterly cold. “I have cried all the tears I intend to shed for anyone ever again. The world is a cold dark place now, and the best way to stay alive is to be just as cold.”
Sighing, Vincent opened the door and turned to her. “I hope you know we will always be there for you, even if you don’t need us or want us. We will always care because you are wrong; the best way to stay alive is to care. I knew a young girl once not so long ago that taught me that… I miss that girl.” With that, he left.
Auska ran her hands through her hair and cursed loudly in frustration. She almost wanted to yell down to him to come back and to apologize but couldn’t... or wouldn’t. It wasn’t that easy for her, why couldn’t he just see that? Why couldn’t they just let her come and go as she needed?
“FUCK!” She kicked the rickety chair across the small room and watched it break on impact with the wall. Why did people have to make things so complicated?
The night was brisk, with a northern breeze that promised the arrival of winter within the month. The sky was littered with patchy slow-moving clouds that obscured stars and moon alike for several minutes at a time before allowing their dim light access to the world once more for a brief time. It made for an ideal night for what was planned.
Hidden in the shadows of their meeting place, Auska waited for the others to arrive. She fought back the shiver that rippled through her. She wished she had dressed warmer, but tonight she expected stealth and agility would be more practical then comforting warmth. Once she started moving, she knew she would warm up, but until then she would be uncomfortable. She was used to that, though, and had trained herself over the years to embrace it, to let it strengthen her. Often Auska would underdress in the colder months, forcing herself to work through the discomfort, to ignore it, to not let it demoralize and weaken her. Now she was used to the biting cold of the winter months, or at least as used to it as she could be.
She rubbed her hands up and down her arms; used to it, but that didn’t mean she would ever like it.
After a few long moments, Jennifer rounded a corner and swiftly merged into the shadows beside Auska. “I almost half expected you weren’t going to show,” she whispered, blowing warmth into her fingers. She was dressed far warmer than Auska, but at least they were dark colors and weren’t noisy with movement.
“Why would you think that?” Auska replied, watching Nick’s shadow drift across the ground from above as he made his rounds.
“Not sure. You just don’t seem like the kind of person who enjoys working as a group or who would willingly put themselves in danger for others.”
Auska’s smile was cold. “I have no intention of putting myself in danger for others. I’ll go along with this because if it works out I’ll come out ahead, but if, when we get there, I think it’s too risky, I’ll tell you and then I’m gone. What you choose after that is up to you.”
The taller girl was nodding. “If you say it’s too risky, we will abort the plan. Won’t be doing my brother any good if I am dead and I’ll just have to find another way to get him extra treatment. Guess I could always let the doctor have his way with me. The bastards wouldn’t even let me see him today, said he was doing worse and they couldn’t risk the sickness spreading!” She kicked at the ground. “Damn it all, I hate feeling useless!”
A pang of guilt washed over Auska for a moment; it was likely her brother was already dead. Her mouth opened to speak but she quickly shut it again. Telling her that wouldn’t help anyway; if he was dead already there was nothing to be done to stop that. And if he managed to hold on until the morning, Jen might very well have what she needed to help him. If not, she would have enough supplies to bring her some comfort in the future.
“I’m sure you wouldn’t be the first to offer your body to the good doctor.”
Jennifer chuckled solemnly. “I’m not sure if that makes me feel better or worse.” Her tone became suddenly more serious. “So, tell me Auska, why aren’t we friends? I’m only two years older than you. I’m smart, witty, know how to have fun. There are only a few girls in our age range. Hell, why don’t you have any friends? You seem likeable enough. A little sour and bitchy around the edges but one can work around that with time.”
Auska rolled her eyes; she was afraid this was going to happen. Anytime she interacted with someone for more than a few minutes, they decided it was time to become friends. She understood options in Sanctuary were limited, but still, why couldn’t people just leave her alone in that regard? “Ever stop to consider I don’t want to be your friend? Nor anyone else’s, for that matter?”
“That’s nonsense, who doesn’t want friends? Shit, life would be boring here if we didn’t have friends. I think after tonight we should hang out more. Who knows? Maybe you’ll even grow to like it. Think of all the shit we could get into!”
Now it was Auska’s turn to be serious. “I don’t want friends. I figured after eight years people would have come to understand that.”
Jen looked almost hurt. “But why would you want to live like that?”
“Because friends die or get you killed,” she replied without hesitation. Words Archer had repeated often and, in the end, held true. He was dead because he chose to get close to Vincent and Kelli… and worst of all, to her.
Jennifer cleared her throat to mask her discomfort. “Well, I guess after tonight I’ll just leave you alone then. Wouldn’t want to be a burden on your life by dying or getting you killed. Though if you ever change your mind you know where to find me.”
“Good,” Auska said pointing across the pathway. “Here come the others. Let’s get going.”
With a quick signal whistle, Nick turned his back and walked the other way along the wall. A rope was tied to a strut in the wall that wouldn’t be easily noticed if someone else came around. The four quickly made their way down to the ground thirty feet below. A quick check showed their pathway was clear from the view of the other sentries and they sprinted the hundred-foot clearing into the safety of the trees.
Their pace was quick as they jogged east for nearly two miles before Auska finally stopped them.
“Why are we stopping?” Ross huffed, though he was clearl
y relieved for the break. Being a perimeter patroller, he was unused to running such distances.
Auska turned on them all, her face dangerously serious. “We are near my stash place.” She could see everyone’s eyes light up as they glanced around trying to determine where it was. She had several places she stashed things; this one was just where her weapons were because it was close to home. But after tonight she would have to move everything to a new location. “Before I grab anything, I need you all to swear you know nothing about this place nor will you ever try and steal from me.” She gave them all a threatening glance. “Because I’ll know it was one of you and I won’t be nice about rectifying it.”
“Wouldn’t dream of stealing from another member of the Eighth, Auska,” Matt stated proudly. “Besides, after tonight we’ll all need stash spots.” Jennifer nodded her head in agreement.
“And you?” Her eyes roamed over Ross, looking for any hint he was a snake in the grass.
He laughed nervously. “Me? Not likely. I wouldn’t go this far out by myself to steal from you. Plus, you terrify the shit out of me.”
“Good.” She almost smiled at the response. It was good that they feared her; fear was a good ally to have and to use with people.
Auska moved off to a stand of thick dead bushes and lifted them aside. With a quick sweep of her foot, she revealed a plank of wood with a handle. Lifting it she pulled out her rifle and slung it across her back and pocketed the nine extra bullets she had for it. With the five rounds in the clip, she had fourteen in total, which she hoped would be more than enough for tonight.
“I don’t have weapons for everyone.” She looked at Jennifer. “Did you get that revolver?”
Jen pulled out the gun from inside her jacket. “I sure did, just hope the three rounds in it actually work.”
Auska took the weapon and inspected it. It was old and not well maintained, but it still looked like it would fire. Opening the cylinder, she examined the three rounds; they were worse for wear then she had hoped. She loaded them back in and handed the weapon back with a grimace. “Your guess is as good as mine. Hopefully, we won’t have to use them but if we do, remember to have another plan just in case.”
Pulling out an old crossbow, she handed it to Matt with four bolts. It was in no better shape than Jen’s revolver. The string was fraying badly and the left limb was warping. She had tried to find newer parts for it but over the last two years had had no luck. “It pulls to the left two inches for roughly every fifteen feet.”
Matt lifted the weapon and inspected it thoroughly. “I think I can remember that.”
“Don’t think, do.” She scowled him. “And try not to lose any of my bolts, they’re hard to come by.”
He grinned and shook his head at her. “Not my first day in the apocalypse, but I’ll remember.”
“What about me?” Ross asked stepping forward trying to peer into the underground crate. “What do I get?”
“Sadly, not much,” Auska muttered pulling out a five-foot spear, tipped with a serrated knife blade.
“A spear?” he said in disappointment. “What the hell am I going to do with that?”
“Throw or stab with it,” Jennifer cut in sarcastically before anyone else could. “With the pointy end, hopefully.”
Ross took the weapon with sagging shoulders, clearly disappointed.
Auska took the weapon from him and took aim at a thick pine tree twenty paces away. With a grunt she let the spear fly, it hit the tree with a thud, burying near three inches of the blade into the hardwood. “Now you try.”
Ross, along with everyone else, seemed confused but he complied; retrieving the weapon, he took aim and threw. The blade sunk deep into the wood nearly five inches.
“I know it’s not an ideal weapon,” Auska began, “but when we had that flood last year, I saw you throwing sandbags for hours on end onto the carts. You’ve got a strong back and shoulders and a good center of balance. I threw as hard as I could and you nearly doubled it.” It was a lie, but she needed him confident. “Plus, your aim was true with the first throw of a weapon you’ve never even held before. Out of all of us and the weapons available, you’re best suited for it. It’s either that or nothing.”
Ross grunted loudly as he pried the weapon free, a grin creeping across his face. “I guess that makes sense. I’d still prefer a gun, but I get it now.” He swung the spear a few times. “I’ll make it work.”
“Good. Now let’s move out. Jen, lead the way to the end of the rainbow,” Auska commanded, already regretting this.
The night was still and quiet; only the chilling breeze that ruffled the treetops could be heard as the four crept closer to the small camp. The trees were thick in this part of the forest, their canopies blocking out most of the night sky, making it near pitch black. Each step had to be carefully placed in hopes to not snap a fallen branch or crunch a pinecone.
Auska motioned them all to crouch further down as they neared the perimeter and its soft glow of torches around the long-forgotten pump house. She had been here only a handful of times in passing and knew the layout only vaguely from memory.
It had a large open room where the main pump had been, now all that remained were some rusted pipes and a wooden grate covering the floor where the hole to an underground water supply had been. On the far back wall, there were two smaller rooms; one had been the electrical room and the other the generator, both stripped clean and left empty. There were only two openings: the door, which surprisingly still worked, and a large half boarded up window on the side of the large room.
Voices around the backside of the building alerted them that there were at least two guards outside. From the sounds of their conversation, they were playing a game of cards or dice. A moment later a shadow passed by the window going towards the back.
“See, only three guards,” Jen boasted proudly, relief clear on her face even in the darkness.
Auska scanned everywhere she could see, hoping noise, movement or a shadow would pinpoint anyone else that might be there. But no matter how long she looked there was nothing; only the three.
“Three that we know of,” she whispered back after nearly twenty minutes of watching. Unease made the hairs on her neck stand tall. “There could be more than just one inside.”
“So, what now?” Jen asked; they were all looking to Auska for direction. “Do we just keep waiting around freezing our asses off, or do we attack?
The role of leader bothered Auska; she didn’t like overseeing people. She could plan and adapt well on her own, but others were wild cards that she didn’t care for. But if they played their hand right, they could do this with ease and keep the element of surprise in their favor, so long as three was all there really was, but she somehow doubted that.
Auska took a deep breath, the urge to back out and leave nagged at her and yet there was no reason for it. Three, even four guards wouldn’t be an issue, at least not for her and so she pushed the thought aside. “Matt and I will circle around back to where the two are playing cards. We will try and take them out without alerting whoever is inside. If we can do that then we can hopefully convince whoever is in there to give up without a fight. If not, well, we kill them, too.”
“What are we to do then?” Ross cut in, almost hurt that he was to be left out.
Auska did her best to keep her annoyance from her tone. “You and Jen wait here and keep a lookout to make sure no one else shows up and watch that fucking door. If anyone comes out of that door, take them out quickly. If not, wait for us to be done and we will signal you over.”
Jennifer moved in closer. “I should come with you. I’ve seen combat before, Matt hasn’t.”
That was something she hadn’t considered, but she held firm in her decision. “Matt has the crossbow. Stealth kills are what we need right now.”
“That rifle isn’t going to be very silent,” muttered Ross holding up the spear as if to make a point.
Auska pulled her throwing axe and grinned an
grily. “One more complaint and I leave with my things. Are we clear?”
Realizing their error, they all quickly nodded.
“Good. Matt let’s go.”
“I want you to know, Auska, I won’t let you down,” Matt whispered, as he followed behind her, trying to make her movements his own. “I may not have killed anyone or even an infected yet, but I am solid. I won’t freeze up or choke, you have my word on that.”
Fighting for calm she turned to face him and growled, “The only ones going to get killed tonight will be us if you don’t fucking shut up.”
His face paled at the realization and he nearly apologized out loud but was able to contain it with a nod of his head before continuing behind her. She was right; silent nights like this carried the sound far and clearly. It was something they had learned very early on in basic training. He cursed himself for getting caught up in the excitement of being chosen for this task.
Skirting around a thick willow bush, Auska’s mind berated her. What was she doing with this group? She worked alone, had always worked alone, well always after he had... she forced the memory from her mind before it could take hold. This was foolish; she should have told Jennifer no and left it at that. But the promise of new weapons and more importantly ammunition had been too much for her to refuse. If this night paid off, she would have enough supplies that come spring she would finally leave and go off on her own.
The thought made her smile inwardly. Leaving Sanctuary had been a goal of hers for years. But always she wasn’t strong enough, old enough, experienced enough, but most importantly, equipped enough. She was all those things now, she was sure of it, and after tonight she would have everything she needed to venture off on her own. Where she would go, she hadn’t a clue; what she would do didn’t even matter. Freedom is all she required. After tonight she would gladly play through the months of winter within Sanctuary until the first taste of spring arrived; then she would slip away and never look back. So, this had to work… she would make it work!
What Remains (Book 2): What's Left Page 5
