Chapter 6
Jensen
When I emerged from my office and saw my secretary smiling a goofy little grin, it was clear she was thrilled to be spending the evening with me. Perhaps that was a rather self-absorbed thought, but a man had to indulge himself every once in a while, didn’t he?
“What has you all smiles?” I asked her with a slightly teasing lilt. She stiffened, fumbling with her phone for a moment before holding the blank screen in front of her face.
“Oh… Just something on my phone,” she said, her voice quaking nervously with the obvious lie. I tilted my head curiously, fighting to keep the mirth out of my eyes. She looked terrified by the prospect of me asking just what she was looking at, and as much as I wanted to tease her, I held back.
“All right. Off we go, then?” I suggested, offering her my arm.
Her eyes widened in a manner she probably thought imperceptible, but Ashley was anything but subtle. Her cheeks flushed a pleasant shade of red, and she obligingly took my arm.
I guided her toward the elevator, a sensation of warmth brewing in my gut as we descended from the top of the building. Happiness seemed to radiate from her entire being, and I couldn’t deny feeling a bit more chipper myself.
“You said the Cerf Blanc, right? Isn’t that one of the most expensive restaurants in San Diego?” she asked shyly, and I curled my lips into a smile.
“Suddenly glad I offered to pay, then?” I teased. She pouted; that adorable expression that made her hazel eyes glimmer, sending jolts of longing through my heart. All right, so perhaps my feelings for her were a bit deeper than I cared to admit.
From the moment Ashley Calhoun had first stepped into my office, those eyes had had me captured. I was but a captive in her presence, gripped by the subtle bounce of her curly hair, her voluptuous curves and those soul-gripping eyes. I couldn’t deny that my reasons for hiring her were less than charitable, though I was certain I had blown my chances at getting her under my desk a long time ago. At least, under my desk with no strings attached.
It was easy to pretend that all I wanted was those luscious lips wrapped around my length, her curls bouncing as she moved her head back and forth…but that wasn’t all that I desired from my tender little secretary, and I felt some trepidation considering that night’s dinner topic.
Then again, I had no intentions of settling down. I intended to make it very clear that all I sought was a surrogate mother. More than once I’d been struck by the thought that Ashley herself would be the perfect mother to my child. She had brains, beauty, wits to boot. She was the kindest woman I’d ever had the pleasure of meeting, and the thought of conceiving naturally with her sent a flare of desire straight to my loins.
I was unaware that I’d tightened my grip on her until she turned to me with wide and imploring eyes. I could only stiffen beneath her gaze. My jaw clenched as I fought to repress the desirous thoughts that brewed in my brain. She was an employee, and I could never cross that line with her. If I allowed myself to get that close to her, even for a night, I wasn’t sure I would ever be willing to let her go.
“Are you all right, Jensen?” she asked gently, resting her hand on top of mine. In spite of the pounding in my heart, I managed to keep my cool as I flashed a broad smile at her.
“Oh, I’m fine, just thinking about what I might have for dinner,” I lied, though she didn’t look altogether convinced. As far as I was concerned, that just made us even after her lie scarce moments ago.
The elevator’s ding as we reached the bottom floor drew Ashley’s attention away from me, and I found myself somewhat grateful. I didn’t exactly want to explain that I was imagining her splayed on my bed in skimpy lingerie.
“All right, so I’m just going to meet you there? Or…?” She trailed off, looking at me with something of a glimmer in her eye. “We could head over there together. I’d like to get a drink and relax after the day I’ve had,” she said mischievously. I raised a brow, unable to stop the grin that nearly split my face in two.
“Oh, so you’re going to be naughty tonight? All right, I suppose I can drive you. Just don’t get too tipsy, I don’t know that I trust you to keep your hands to yourself,” I said just above a whisper, leading her out of the elevator. Her eyes widened, and I wasn’t quite sure if she was scandalized or just embarrassed.
“You get to be a bad boy every day, Jensen. Let someone else have some fun for once,” she said after a moment. I felt my mouth go dry, arousal spiking between my thighs. She simply smirked at me, drawing away just as we reached my red sports car. I opened the passenger door for her, winking as she settled inside.
“All right, I guess I’ll just have to keep an eye on you then,” I said with a smile, closing the door and circling around the car. As I opened the door, the last thing I expected was the retort she offered.
“I hope you’re able to control yourself,” she said flirtily, her expression bolder than I’d ever seen it before. I knew it was a dangerous line we were toeing, and professionalism had long been thrown out the window. Just the same, I had to play it cool. It was for her own good, after all.
“Oh, perish the thought,” I replied under my breath, my heart lurching when she seemed upset that I hadn’t taken her bait. Was there more to this dinner than I’d expected? Ashley was a terrible liar, and if she wanted to discuss anything beyond a bit of work chatter, I would surely know by now.
Cranking the ignition, I backed out of the parking lot faster than was strictly necessary. Even though I had to keep things professional, I still wanted to impress the woman at my side. It was a game of give and take, but I had to remain certain that it was just that: a game. Ashley clutched the armrests of her seat, pressed against leather upholstery. I pretended not to notice the way her thighs subtly shifted together, nor the pleased flush on her cheeks.
“You sure know how to show a girl a good time,” she said teasingly. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see a sliver of her thigh peeking out from beneath her skirt, and it was all I could do to keep from swerving off the road. She was just teasing me, and it was nothing I couldn’t handle. If she wanted to press me, I wasn’t about to be outdone.
“Oh, Ashley dear, I’ve not begun to show you a good time. At least, not yet,” I said lasciviously. I regretted the words as soon as I said them, though there was something all too thrilling about the way she blushed from her cheeks all the way down to her neck. I longed to see if her blush dipped down any deeper, perhaps between the valley of her sizable breasts.
Forcing my eyes on the road, I realized we were closer to the Cerf Blanc than I’d thought. I tried to calm my racing heart, and the rush of blood that seemed intent on surging in my groin. I wasn’t some high school kid with a crush, I was a grown man having dinner with his secretary.
I banished the thought of her lips shaped in a perfect ‘O’ from my mind, pulling into a parking spot and cutting the ignition. The vibrations of the car ceased, and I was all too aware of the pleased haze in Ashley’s gaze. Perhaps I had pushed her too far. The situation was getting dangerous fast, and I tried to repeat rationalizations in my mind. She was an employee. She was off-limits. I could not take her to my penthouse and have my way with her, as much as her gorgeous eyes begged for it.
“Here we are,” I managed, offering her a warm smile. She shook off her dazed state, glancing toward me with a blush.
“Here we are,” she repeated. Apparently unable to take the tension any longer, she pushed her door open and scrambled out of the car.
Disaster avoided.
For now.
Chapter 7
Jensen
As we stepped into the restaurant, I could sense that Ashley was nervous. I could only wonder if I had pushed her too far, if I had crossed the unspoken boundary I had tried so desperately to tiptoe around.
She didn’t seem angry, however, only glancing toward me with a shy smile every few moments as we were seated. The waiter asked us for our drink orders, and before the woma
n could speak, I suggested that he bring a bottle of their finest champagne. Ashley’s eyes widened, and she looked all too ready to protest.
“Please, Ashley. It’s my treat. Just enjoy yourself,” I said with my best attempt at a comforting smile.
She still looked nervous, but she managed a faint smile as she folded her hands on top of the table. She was fidgeting almost uncontrollably, and before I could think, I reached out to rest one of my hands on top of hers. She stiffened a bit, glancing toward me with a timid expression. “If I’ve made you uncomfortable…” I began, but she shook her head fervently before I could continue.
“It’s nothing like that, Jensen. I just have a lot on my mind right now,” she said, her words measured and careful. As much as I wanted to press her for further information, I could tell that it would not be forthcoming any time soon. Instead, I drew my hand away and flipped through the menu that had been placed in front of me. I had been to the restaurant a dozen times over, and knew you couldn’t go wrong with their lobster tail in buttered garlic sauce. I had my doubts that Ashley had been to the restaurant before, though.
“What are you planning to order then?” I asked idly, continuing to study the menu, pretending to be entirely absorbed in the task. She seemed to relax slightly once my eyes were no longer on her, and she reached out with shaking hands to grab her own menu. She opened it to the appetizers page, eyes widening in alarm.
“O-oh. I can’t… This is all so expensive! I’ll just have a glass of water,” she said quietly, a sense of urgency in her tone. I smiled gently, meeting her gaze and holding it for a long moment. Her nervousness seemed swift to return, and her cheeks turned that increasingly familiar shade of pink.
“Ashley, if I have to order for you, I’m ordering the most expensive thing on the menu,” I said with a sly grin. She looked stunned, and fumbled with the menu for a moment.
“A salad, then?” she tried to bargain, and I could only roll my eyes in amusement.
“You seem the type who would enjoy the shrimp alfredo. It comes with a side salad and garlic bread. I’ve had it a few times, and it’s an utter delight. Not that you can go wrong with anything here…” I trailed off, considering the menu for a moment longer. “Nothing under thirty dollars. Otherwise, have at it,” I added cheekily. She sputtered indignantly for a moment, looking as if she would like nothing more than to flail her arms at me.
“Fine. The alfredo, you said?” she finally said, apparently deciding to go along with it. I was somewhat surprised she didn’t put up more of a fight, but I couldn’t help internally celebrating my victory.
“Yes, you’ll love it. Oh, and just in time. Champagne’s here,” I said, stopping the waiter from pouring me a glass. “For the lady only, tonight. I’m driving,” I grinned, pleased by the bulging of Ashley’s eyes. It was obvious that she’d never been on the receiving end of such spoiling, and in spite of my intention to keep things professional, I intended to remedy that.
“Thank you,” Ashley said weakly as the champagne was poured, taking a sip with some trepidation. A soft sigh drew itself from her lips, and another spike of arousal shot through me. The sheer pleasure in that sigh would have been enough to drive any man mad, I’m sure of it.
I scarcely heard when the waiter asked for our food orders, though Ashley was thankfully paying attention for both of us.
“I appreciate you inviting me out, Ashley. I truly mean that,” I said once the waiter had stepped away, watching my secretary with a self-assured smile. She made a face, swishing the sparkling liquid in her glass.
“I don’t think it counts if you’re the one paying,” she said drily. I chuckled, shrugging my shoulders.
“I wouldn’t have come out alone. I fully intended to spend the evening home alone, sulking,” I assured her. “I actually had something I wanted to discuss with you,” I began, resting my chin in my hand. Ashley seemed to grow more anxious, wringing her hands before taking another long gulp from her champagne glass.
“Can I go first?” she inquired weakly, tracing her finger along the rim of the glass. Unsure of what was bothering her, and afraid that I had done something to cause it, I simply nodded and gestured for her to speak.
She was hesitant, glancing from me, to her glass, to the floor, then back again. She worried her bottom lip between her teeth, tapping her nails on the tabletop.
“What’s bothering you? You know you can talk to me about anything. I know I feel like I can discuss anything with you,” I offered, reaching out to take her hand in my own. Her eyes flitted from side to side and after a moment she emptied her glass.
“Promise me that you won’t get angry,” she said meekly. It was my turn to hesitate, even if it was for the briefest of moments. I was confident that nothing she could say would truly anger me, so I nodded my head and smiled.
“I won’t get angry. Just talk to me,” I said with a smile. She returned the expression hesitantly, squeezing my hand and taking a deep breath. Before she could speak, however, the waiter arrived with our food. I was forced to break my grip on her, drawing my hand back to my side and waiting until the man stepped away. Ashley seemed to have lost her nerve in that brief moment, and for the time being I decided to let it go.
We ate in companionable silence, though Ashley did allow the occasional sigh to slip past her lips. When we had little more than scraps on our plate, I waved the waiter down to take our food. As he did, Ashley seemed to grow aware of the fact that I expected her to make her confession. She swallowed, struggling to form the words.
“I was in your office today,” she began, taking another large swallow of wine. I snorted out a laugh, crossing my arms.
“I’m well aware, Ashley. The pastry was delicious, by the way. I’m not sure why that has you in such a tizzy though,” I chuckled. She blanched, averting her eyes.
“Well, that’s not it. While I was in your office, I happened to see that your computer was unlocked. I…I took a peek, and I’m really sorry, Jensen. I was just so curious, and I saw that…I saw that you were looking for a surrogate mother,” she confessed, seemingly ready to burst into tears. Although I was slightly taken aback at the invasion of privacy, I couldn’t be too angry, especially considering that I had planned to tell her anyway.
“Ashley—” I began, only for her to cut me off with a nervous grin.
“B-but, there’s a reason I asked you out to dinner tonight. I wanted to take your mind off of things, yes…but there’s something else,” she rambled, and I could only stare at her in confusion. She seemed to be working herself up more and more with each passing moment, and I knew that interrupting her couldn’t help. I just waited for her to finish her thought, nowhere near prepared for what she was going to say. “I wanted to tell you, I could be a surrogate for you. That is…if you’d like,” she finally managed to get out, her cheeks a bright shade of red.
The words barely registered in my mind, and all I could see was that she seemed to be ready to hyperventilate. Before I could open my mouth to speak and offer her some comfort, my mind fully grasped what she was offering. I felt my own eyes grow wide with surprise, my mouth hanging agape. Ashley seemed to take it as a bad sign, and furiously began to apologize again.
It was difficult for me to form a coherent thought of my own in that moment, let alone come up with something to calm her down. All I could think was that Ashley, my beautiful, wonderful secretary, had just offered to be a surrogate mother for me.
“Ashley, calm down,” I managed, though my own voice was quaking slightly. I’d never been one to lose my cool, but this was far from a normal situation.
She turned to look at me, her eyes wide and teary, and I reached out to gently touch her cheek. Her skin was warm to the touch and much to my surprise, she seemed to press into my hand. Her breathing calmed a bit, and she closed her eyes, looking as exhausted as if she had just run a marathon.
As much as I didn’t want to press her further, I had to know.
Did she mean it?
Chapter 8
Jensen
I carefully formulated my thoughts before speaking, not wanting to upset her again. I also didn’t want to appear callous or rude, or as if I had been dying for her to say those very words (though in a way, I had been). For a moment I wanted nothing more than to circle around the table and draw her into my arms.
“Ashley…what are you suggesting?” I finally managed to ask, wishing there was some way I could take the blunt edge off of the words.
In response, she only buried her face in her hands, and I was afraid she would burst into tears at any given moment.
“I’m not angry with you,” I continued, “I just…I don’t understand. Do you realize the gravity of what you’re offering?” I asked carefully, drawing my hand back toward myself and resting my chin in my palm.
“Of course I realize. We’re talking about bringing a child into the world,” she muttered into her hands, hesitating a moment before sitting upright. “I’m not asking you to be in a relationship or anything. I wouldn’t expect you to entangle yourself in anything unnecessarily complicated,” she mumbled. As much as I wanted to correct her, I knew it was better to let her continue with that train of thought.
“How could it not get complicated? We work together, and…” I trailed off, realizing that was the only real argument I had. It wasn’t as if I would dislike fathering a child with Ashley; just the opposite was true. I was just all too aware of her feelings for me, and the somewhat mutual feelings I felt in turn. As far as she knew, her feelings were entirely one-sided, and it could get complicated beyond belief if she came to know otherwise.
“We’re friends first, right, Jensen? At least, that’s how I’ve always felt. We’re friends, and we both want a child. I know we work together, but the way I see it, this is a practical solution to both of our problems. We could co-raise a child, and we would both get what we want,” she said, growing more confident as she spoke. It was obvious that she had given this some thought, and I couldn’t lie and say I’d not considered it. Granted, I was somewhat taken aback by the suddenness of her suggestion.
Protect Me - A Steamy Bodyguard Romance (You Can't Resist a Bad Boy Book 5) Page 30
