by Tiana Smith
She left with a wave, and Logan and I awkwardly walked next door, a foot between us the whole time. Logan asked the employee which pieces had been set aside while I wandered the rows of suits, my hand trailing along the fabric. Did Vince have his picked out? Would he wear a tux or a regular suit? I hoped he knew our homecoming was formal. But he hadn’t asked me what I’d be wearing so he could coordinate vest colors or anything like that. Did that mean anything?
“I’ll be in the first dressing room,” Logan said, his breath tickling my ear. I jumped and spun. When had he walked up behind me? I brushed the goose bumps on my arms and took a step back.
“Okay, I’m coming,” I said, motioning for him to lead the way.
He raised his eyebrows but otherwise didn’t move. “Into my dressing room?”
My cheeks flamed. “Of course not.” I cleared my throat. “They have chairs right outside, next to the mirrors. I’ll wait there.”
He smirked, like maybe he knew the thoughts that had run through my head just a second before. Then he turned and walked back the way he’d come.
I followed slowly, scolding myself the whole while. Before all this mess started, I’d been able to see how Logan’s behavior wasn’t really flirting. That was just who he was. Like a fish needing water, Logan got his kicks out of seeing me blush.
So how come it affected me so much now? Why couldn’t I turn it off?
Logan is just being friendly, I told myself.
I’d like to be friendly with him, my traitorous thoughts answered back. I shushed them and focused on putting one foot in front of the other.
I was focusing so hard, I didn’t realize we’d already reached the dressing rooms and I’d almost followed Logan inside.
“I was joking earlier,” he said, leaning against the doorframe. “But if you really want to come in…”
“No!” I blurted, stepping back so fast, I bumped into the wall. “No, I’m good, really. I’ll wait here. You go change.”
“But don’t change too much, right? You like me just the way I am.”
I scowled and pushed him into the changing room, closing the door and leaning against it with a silent sigh. Why did boys make everything so difficult? Clutching my purse, I walked to the chairs and sank into one.
Get a grip, I told myself. What would Vince think?
That shut me up.
Maybe Robyn had done this as a test of how much I really liked Vince.
If so, I was failing.
I opened the notepad app on my phone and tried to brainstorm article ideas for the paper while Logan changed. How could I make sports more interesting to someone who wasn’t interested in them? Someone like me? Because if I could figure out how to do that, I’d double my chances at winning that internship. Mr. Quince had done me a favor when he’d passed Spencer’s column to me. If only I could figure out how to exploit it.
The dressing-room door clicked open, and Logan emerged.
Shirtless.
“Which one of these should I wear?” he asked, holding out two shirts. I wasn’t focusing on that, though, because hello, Logan was shirtless!
Did he know what his abs did to girls? I tore my gaze from the muscles in question and looked at the shirts. One was blue, the other green.
“Ummm,” I said. Super coherent. That was me.
“Do you know what color dress Elena is wearing?” Logan asked.
Yes. Elena. Logan was going to homecoming with Elena, and I had no right ogling his abs. Or his biceps. Or the way his pants hung on his hips, leaving just enough to the imagination. Feeling hot all over, I swung my gaze around, looking everywhere but at him.
“Ummm. She told me it was black.” Back when we were still talking. That thought brought another pang. “So that means she’ll match with any shirt you wear.”
“Okay, but which one of these should I wear with these pants?”
The tux was black. It wasn’t like either shirt would clash. I had a feeling Logan was doing this simply because he could. Playing with me. Taunting. The thought made me a little mad and gave me courage to stand up, look Logan in the eye, and push a shirt into his rock-hard chest.
“This one,” I said, not even noticing which one it was.
Logan smirked, knowing full well he’d won this round. I turned on my heel and marched back to my chair, not turning around until I heard the click of his dressing-room door.
He came out a minute later, fully clothed this time, thankfully.
I let myself eye his frame. It was what I was here for, after all.
“That one’s all right,” I said, feigning indifference.
“Only all right?” he asked, his dimples in full force. “Guess I need to keep trying, then.”
No. He didn’t need to keep trying. If he did, he might just break my resolve once and for all, and that would be a complete and utter disaster, as my pros-and-cons list made clear. The entire school would go back to judging me, Robyn’s business would tank, and I would be in a relationship with someone who wasn’t serious about anything. Myself included. Plus Robyn would have every reason in the world to hate me, even if her actions today still made absolutely zero sense.
I took a deep breath and let it out. Logan disappeared into his changing room again, and I mentally listed all of Vince’s positive characteristics.
I simply needed to get to know Vince better. Give him a chance. I’d gone through all the effort of securing this relationship—but I’d barely given it a shot. This was my chance to learn everything there was to know about Vince, so Robyn couldn’t claim anymore that I only liked the idea of him. I straightened my shoulders and sat up in the chair.
I was the one who needed to try harder.
“What are you working on while you wait?” Logan asked, his voice muffled through the door.
“Article ideas for the paper,” I answered. “My last sports piece didn’t bring in nearly enough page views.” Even though I’d clicked refresh on my own computer probably a dozen times. I had to do my part to convince the school that students read it, after all. “Did you think it was okay?”
“I didn’t read it.”
That wasn’t the answer I was expecting.
“I don’t read any of the paper. Ever.”
“Ever?” I gasped. “I know you said you didn’t like the news, but you never read the paper? Even ours? You’re on the newspaper staff.”
“Goes against my principles,” he said. I could hear the joke in his voice—could picture the way his dimples would deepen and his eyes would glint.
But—he didn’t even read my articles?
Obviously, I’d made the right choice. The only choice. Vince did well in school. Vince read the paper.
Logan emerged again, in a different tux and a black shirt. The all-black ensemble suited him so well that I nearly swallowed my gum, and Logan grinned. But a relationship wasn’t all about butterflies and sparks. It needed something more to really last, and Vince had that kind of commitment. I just had to prove it.
“So this one then?” he asked, and I wondered why I bothered pretending. “Think Elena will like it?”
Right. Logan was interested in Elena now, which meant he really. Was. Not. Flirting. With. Me.
If he did like me, he’d have read my articles. Did he read Elena’s? I couldn’t bring myself to ask the question.
“Yes,” I said as calmly as I could muster. “Elena will love it.” If my voice sounded a little flat, no one could blame me. I picked up my purse and slung it over my shoulder. “Sorry, I have to go.” Have to go get my head on straight was more like it.
Logan looked a little surprised but quickly masked his expression, so I wondered whether I’d imagined it.
“I have to get ready for my date.” It was more a reminder for myself than for Logan, but he nodded anyway.
I left uneasy, hating that I felt so unsettled when everything was supposed to be neatly lined up like dominoes. Dominoes that might come crashing down with just a single push.
sixteen
My parents didn’t like me going out on school nights, which meant that convincing them I’d finished all my homework and could be trusted to return by curfew took a full half hour. That was thirty minutes of my life I’d never get back. Dad caved as soon as I passed him a pack of Oreos under the table, but my mom was another story entirely. Eventually, I made it out the door.
Vince and I pulled into the rec center parking lot, and I checked my hair in the mirror of the visor. Wednesday was discount night for all Athens High students, so I’d probably—no, definitely—run into a lot of my classmates tonight. I didn’t need to give them any ammunition by not looking my best.
“Ready?” Vince asked, taking the keys from the ignition. My nerves were jangling twice as much as the keys, and I gave Vince a shaky smile.
“I guess?”
We walked through the doors, and I was immediately assaulted by the bright lights and sounds of people talking over one another. Oh, and the smell of too many teenagers in one common room. That was lovely.
“What first?” Vince asked. “Pool? Shuffleboard? Ping-Pong? No, wait, you’re a bowling kind of girl, aren’t you?” He gestured to the separate rooms in turn, ending with the bowling lanes down the hall.
“Tempting, but I definitely need some food first before I publicly embarrass myself,” I said. Vince laughed like he thought I was joking.
Thankfully, he brought me over to the concession line anyway.
So far, the best part about tonight was that no one was giving me the cold shoulder. When Vince offered to pay for my popcorn and bottled water, a girl in line behind us actually shot me an envious look. Somehow that felt better than a smile.
Phase one—get Vince to go out with me—was a success. Phase two—get to know each other so we could recognize our soul-mate potential—oh, it was happening. I knew we were both planners; after all, he already had much of his future plotted out. But besides our organized nature and overachiever attitudes, we had to have something else in common.
“So, Vince,” I said, switching the water bottle to my other hand and taking a piece of popcorn from the tub he held. “I was wondering—”
“Hey, look, there’s Elena,” he said, pulling me by the hand down the hall to the entrance of the bowling alley, where Elena stood with a few of her theater friends. Well, this was just peachy. Robyn thought they’d be a great match, so this boded well. Not. Plus Elena was pretty much the last person I wanted to talk to right now. Or ever.
“I think I’ll go to the bathroom before we start any games,” I said, freeing my hand from his.
Vince stopped. “I thought you guys made up,” he said. “She told me she apologized for the article.”
“She did,” I said. “We’re just not really talking to each other right now.” I’d never expected to be on the receiving end of one of her freeze-outs, and the thought made me crumble inside. Would we ever bounce back? I wanted the fun Elena again, the one who played pranks and was overly dramatic. Just not dramatic in this way.
“Mia.” He gave me a look. His expression made it obvious that he totally didn’t see things like I did.
How come this couldn’t be something we shared in common?
“Hey, she’s not exactly blameless here,” I said, taking a step back. Vince came closer and placed a hand on my arm.
“I know,” he said. “I didn’t mean it like that. Look, you go to the bathroom and I’ll say hi to Elena. Want to bowl first? I’ll go find an open group.”
I beamed up at him gratefully. “You’re the best,” I said, and placed a kiss on his cheek. He turned his head to give me a kiss on the lips. Then he dropped the hand from my face to give me a small push in the direction of the bathrooms.
Vince continued down the hall and I ducked behind a corner where I could watch his interaction with Elena. She saw Vince and smiled, reminding me of all the times we’d joked together. When was the last time we’d even acknowledged each other? It wasn’t like we’d been best friends before, but she was one of the only friends I had. I wasn’t the most extroverted person around. Watching them talk made my stomach feel hollow, and I turned away.
I took my time in the bathroom, washing my hands until they were pink. When I couldn’t put it off any longer, I made my way back toward the bowling lanes, expecting Vince to have gone inside and found an open spot. He hadn’t. He and Elena were still talking off to the side of the entrance, though her friends had left to find seats at an open lane. My footsteps slowed and I desperately looked around for something that might save me from another confrontation with my former friend. If we actually talked, I might say things I’d later regret. Right now I needed to know we still had hope.
Elena’s eyes met mine and her jaw clenched. By the time I made it to Vince’s side, I was pretty sure she’d need dental work from how much she was grinding her teeth.
“Hi, Elena,” I said, trying to sound indifferent. “What a nice surprise.”
She tossed her hair over her shoulder.
“Yes, well, not much of a surprise, really,” she said. “Athens High discount nights are my favorite. Vince knows that. We almost always run into each other here.”
Was she trying to make me jealous? Well, it wasn’t going to work. I put my arm through Vince’s and leaned against him.
“That’s nice,” I said. “Vince, maybe we should go in.”
“Okay,” he said, turning around and searching the groups with his eyes, taking a few steps. Elena trailed after us.
The bowling section was in a separate room from the rest of the rec center, with only three lanes and a few seats at each ball return. In the dim light, I could see Elena’s friends waving her over, and I suppressed a groan. The only two empty seats for any games were with her group.
By the time we slid into our seats, though, I had a hard time holding back my smile. I was Vince’s girlfriend. Here we were, hanging out with his friends as if it was normal for someone like Vince to be out with someone like me. Our fingers touched while reaching for popcorn, and my smile doubled in size.
I didn’t pay much attention to the game. My mind was a little preoccupied with Vince’s arm muscles. Well, that and wondering how on earth I would salvage my friendship with Elena. Because with each silent glare she sent my way, the temperature in the room dropped by twenty degrees.
When Elena finished her turn, she sat back down and I cleared my throat.
“So,” I said, accidentally spilling a little water when I squeezed the bottle too hard. Talking to Elena didn’t used to be difficult. But now I could feel the panic building in my chest like a balloon on the edge of bursting. Why did I feel like each word coming out of my mouth was a potential bomb? “How were callbacks?” I set the water aside and wiped my hands on my jeans.
She rolled her eyes but quickly schooled her expression when Vince looked her way. “Good, I guess. I got the part I wanted.”
“That’s great,” I said, pulling the tub of popcorn closer. Maybe if I had something to do with my hands, this conversation wouldn’t make me want to hide under the table for eternity. “What part is that again?”
“The low-class wannabe who pretends to be your friend but is too busy stabbing your back to notice no one likes her.”
I inhaled sharply—and promptly started choking on a piece of popcorn. My coughing seemed magnified in the silence surrounding Elena’s comment. It wasn’t the pretty kind of cough, either. It was the holy-crap-I’m-going-to-die-by-popcorn kind of cough.
Vince removed his hand from my leg and started thumping my back. People across the bowling alley turned to see what all the fuss was all about. I felt the sharp edges of the kernel scraping my throat as it debated whether to go up or down. Elena gave me a dirty look before turning back to her other friends. Good to know my imminent death meant so much to her.
In fact, everyone ignored me. Even once my coughing was over, they turned to one another like I didn’t exist. Like Elena hadn’t just slapped me
with her words. No one came to my defense. I was the outsider, the person who threatened their social standing with my mere existence as Vince’s girlfriend. I looked over at him to see if my knight in shining armor would come to my rescue. But Vince was busy staring at his shoes.
I picked my bag up off the floor and stood up. I’d had such high hopes for tonight. Maybe it was my fault for expecting too much.
My bag shook in my arms, and I tried to catch Vince’s eye. When he didn’t look up, I felt my anger go up a notch, like a hook in my heart I couldn’t remove. I didn’t even wait to make sure Vince would follow. I just walked toward the exit as fast as possible.
Vince caught up to me when I was nearly at the front doors of the rec center.
“You didn’t even try to defend me,” I said, pushing open the doors with more force than was necessary. Maybe my next article would be about high school cliques. If I included enough of them, I could get everyone to read it. And then they’d all find out how horrible Elena’s group was.
“There wasn’t any time to.” He reached out to touch me on the arm, but I brushed him off. The crisp evening air felt good on my overheated skin, and I took a step away.
“I’m sorry, Mia.” He took my hand, closing the distance. “I should have said something. Elena’s not usually like that. You know,” he said, weaving his fingers through mine, “for what it’s worth, she really did get the part of the shrew.”
Against my will, a small chuckle escaped. It was like the part was made for her. Of course, right after I thought that, I felt a flash of guilt. If Elena and I had any chance at making things right, I needed to stop being so critical of her every move.
We walked the rest of the way to the car in silence. He opened the door for me, and I slid into the seat. He put an arm at the top of the open door and leaned on the frame, his eyes focused on something in the distance.
“Mia, do you even like me?” he asked.
I looked up in surprise. “What?”
