Fists of Iron_An Urban Fantasy Novel

by J. A. Cipriano

  I glanced over at Bobby through the hood and he was looking right back at me. “Yeah, really exciting,” I said, trying to ape the lady’s chipper tones.

  Bobby nodded and faked a smile. “Yeah, I agree.” He gave me a reassuring nod and turned towards the table. “So what else is going on?”

  Before anyone else could break into another round of gossip, two more people dropped down into open chairs at the table. I’d say I should’ve kicked myself for not seeing them coming, but the Forum was a bustling madhouse of activity, sound-filtering spells or not, and I’d frankly been far more absorbed by what Umar had been telling us.

  They looked to have the same translucent flesh of the rest of the dead souls, but I really doubted these particular folks were actually, you know, dead. Mainly because I had seen both of them alive not too long ago.

  John Perez and Tabitha Marlowe sat across the table from Bobby and me, dressed in “native” clothes. John smiled and that eye of his twitched, “Yes, I’d really like to know what’s going on around the sector.”

  18

  The actual dead souls at the table, Bobby included, looked both surprised and a bit suspicious at the two newcomers. It must have been a bit of a stretch to accept one brand-new face with no one getting in through the Pearly gates, but three all at once in one place? Yeah, that was a bit much for these folks to swallow.

  Me, well, I tried to keep my cool because the last thing I needed was for John to out me right now. I was pretty sure that would end badly for everyone involved.

  “There isn’t too much to talk about. It’s been a pretty boring day.” They would recognize my voice, but they likely already knew who I was. Why else would they be at this spot? It couldn’t be dumb luck, not like this.

  Ghost Tabitha put a hand on John’s shoulder. “I don’t think these fine souls can be of much help. We shouldn’t tarry long.” The hesitance and uncertainty I had noticed in her at Olympus seemed a fair bit worse now. I figured she would have ditched on John by now, but I guess some people love authority way too much.

  Bobby glanced sidelong at me and I gave him a faint nod. “Yeah, probably best for you folks to move on. With all the fuss at the wall, souls are a little wary of folks they don’t know.” He flashed that baby-face smile of his. “No offense, ya know?”

  John shook his head slowly. “No offense taken, but we can’t move on quite yet.” Tabitha frowned as he kept talking in slow, even tones. “You know how hard it is to find a lost soul in Heaven with so many sectors and so many people, and we seem to have been separated from our companion.” He opened his spectral hands wide. “Surely you godly beings would want to help us with this, especially in these uncertain times?”

  Umar looked unconvinced, but Frieda scooted forward on her chair. “You should have said that straight away! Of course we can try to help you, though what help we could be is circumspect.” She smiled apologetically. “Heaven is a vast place, as you said.”

  “I heard there was a bit of trouble around here last cycle and our friend told me he’d be in this sector then,” John said very neatly, not lying. “If anything did happen, maybe knowing about it would be helpful to us?”

  Bobby put a hand on my shoulder, trying to be my limiter, but I ignored him as I did too many times before. “I already said it was a slow day, buddy,” I pointed out, putting my hands on the table to emphasize my point. My now uncovered and very solid hands.

  I tried to cover them up quickly and no one seemed to notice, thank God, as Frieda scowled at me. “But that’s not true, friend. These poor souls are looking for their friend.” She shook her head at me. “You should make sure your friend is more charitable, Robert.”

  Bobby elbowed me lightly under the table, but was still smiling on the outside. “Yeah, bro, what were you thinking?” He shrugged at John. “Sorry for my buddy here, but we’re all a little antsy with the gate and everything. I didn’t see anything myself though, but Umar here was telling us about what he saw.” He turned towards where Umar was sitting. “Umar?”

  Except Umar wasn’t sitting there anymore. No fancy vanishing trick, I don’t think. We were all focused on John and the place was crowded as hell. An elephant could sneak out under those conditions.

  It didn’t matter how he managed it, it couldn’t lead to anything good. While Frieda looked confused, Tabitha and Bobby both seemed to share my concerns, looking about the crowded Forum. I knew better, knew it’d be stupid to even try to look for him amid all the other ghostly bodies. Instead, I focused on John who was looking right back at me.

  “You’re making a bad situation worse, Butcher,” he growled, not giving a flying fig for subterfuge anymore. “That little stunt almost blew our cover and now Abner’s loose, no doubt on his way to Krakowski.”

  “Well, at least that explains how you got in here, but I’d argue you’re the one fucking everything up right now,” I retorted. Abner had told me before he was given life by a spirit from Yahweh, a luminous being or the like. He’d done miracles here and there before. Why couldn’t he have provided a back door into Heaven? That last bit, about Abner being on the loose, bothered me though. “And what do you mean he’s ‘loose’? He’s a free man, soul, lump of clay, whatever you want to call it.”

  “After that last incident, he’s as much a criminal as you and my wife, but Director Knowles used certain enchantments to ensure he would fulfill his obligations.” John pointed right at my face. I could literally see the veins throbbing in his forehead. “I’m going to give you one chance and one chance only. You either spill all the information you have and the plans of you and your accomplices or else…”

  “Or else what, Johnny?” I growled at the Peacekeeper. I was done with his bullshit. If he’d spent a second talking with the Rabbi, maybe we wouldn’t be in Heaven while it was besieged by Old Ones. Maybe we would be winning. So yeah, fuck him.

  As he opened his mouth to reply, I cut him off by smacking my hand on the table. “You’ll put me in cuffs and slap me in wizard jail? The entire universe is going down the shitter and that’s all you care about, isn’t it?” Even through my tunnel vision was focused on John and his smug face, I was dimly aware that not only had Frieda bounced, but Bobby was tugging at me in an effort to get me to stand while Tabitha doing the same with John. “We’d already have this shit dealt with if you would get the nightstick out of your ass and listen.”

  “C’mon, Frank, debate club’s over for the night,” Bobby growled, frustration thick in his voice.

  Tabby nodded to that sentiment, “The soul’s right, Peacekeeper. There’s nothing more we can learn here.” John relented as Tabitha tugged on his arm, both of them standing up together. Before they could scurry off into the crowd, I managed to catch Tabby’s free arm.

  “You know he’s wrong, Tabby, and what you’re doing to Abner’s wrong,” I got out before Bobby pulled me away. I had no idea if I had gotten through to her and honestly every moment yelling at each other was another moment I was making more trouble for my brother.

  Our two little pairs separated, going opposite directions around that ring of the mini-Forum. While most of our little dispute had been hidden in the general roar of the crowd, the nearest souls to our table were giving us the hairy eyeball, prompting Bobby to pull harder and me to stumble along quicker. If it wouldn’t have caused an even bigger panic, I’d have ditched the robes then and there.

  Bobby glanced back at me as we managed to get to the stairs leading upward. “Look, Frank, if the angel cops stop us, don’t fight them and don’t try to run. It won’t work and will just fuck things up more.”

  “I’m sorry,” I threw out preemptively. I was suddenly really worried about what the consequences for Bobby would be if we got caught. The last thing I wanted to do was screw up eternity for my brother. “I lost my cool and–”

  He laughed as we started up the stairs. “Can it, man. I might’ve handled it differently, but that guy seemed like a dick. Just promise me you won’t shoot an ange
l in the face, okay?”

  “I haven’t done that yet, have I?” Bobby stopped abruptly on the steps and shot me a look. “Okay, shit, I promise!” If we had been caught, I hadn’t been planning on resisting anyway. It would have been stupid and futile, things I weren’t totally against trying, but not if it would risk Bobby. I’d gotten him here in the first place, after all. Besides, what could I do to guys strong enough to take down Krishna?

  “I’m holding you to that,” Bobby said, nodding. “Now act natural, er, heavenly. Whatever, you know what I mean.” My return nod seemed to satisfy Bobby enough for him to turn and start to ascend the stairs again. I adjusted my hood for maximum concealment and followed him.

  It didn’t matter one bit. I can’t say if it was our outburst, too many strangers in one place, my flash of living flesh, or too many strange questions, but something had been passed along to the Powers That Be. Said Powers had listened and were waiting for us at the top of the stairs.

  There were three of them, nine foot tall, broad-shouldered men with the heads of greyhounds. Like some of the soldier-angels I had seen on the flight through the wall, they were dressed in fitted bronze breastplates, very Roman-like, with studded leather skirts and sandals. They carried very modern metal catch poles, you know those sticks with the lasso loops on the end, with silver cable instead of rope, and had their ears up and noses sniffing away.

  As we got to the top of the stairs, the three politely stepped around us. Up close, I could make out the faint golden halos around their heads. The lead dog-angel-man raised a hand as he said, “Robert Butcher, we know you are accompanied by a living soul. We would ask that you and your companion come with us quietly.” His voice was androgynous and soothing, not the harsh bark I expected it to be. “Please, there has been enough disruption to the calm of the citizens already.”

  Bobby and I exchanged a glance. His was full of acceptance, the “this is what happens when Frank’s around” look I knew all too well even after a decade apart. I let out a sigh and turned back to Cop Dog and held out my hands.

  “Yeah, I’m not going to make any trouble, Officer Barks,” I relented. “All I ask is you take me to the Big Guy.”

  One of the angel’s ears twitched. “That is not the normal procedure. Why would we take you to see God?”

  “You just tell ‘em it's Frank Butcher doing the asking.” I tried to look confident as I smirked, way more confident than I felt. “That’s all the reason your bosses will need.”

  It didn’t quite work out as I wanted it to, but it worked out a damned sight better than I thought it would. We both got bound by the wrists with the Cop Dogs catch poles and led with surprising gentleness out of the Forum and through the streets. The souls out and about stopped and stared, the ripple of gossip over seeing a living person in Heaven no doubt making their day or cycle or whatever the hell they called it.

  After enduring about ten minutes of this Walk of Shame before we came to what had to be the Angel Gate thingy Bobby had mentioned on our walk to the Forum. Now, I don’t know which came first, but the Gate looked an awful lot, like copyright-infringing a lot, like a portal right out of Stargate, even if it was a large rectangle instead of a spinning ring. A good thirty feet tall and maybe half as wide, the burnished bronze border filled with a shimmering metallic liquid that rippled with each person that passed through it.

  Without a word passing between them, the trio of angel dogs split up, two going with me and heading toward the Gate, the other about to take Bobby down a side street. They were taken aback, I think, by the fact we both took that moment to plant our feet, pulling against the catch poles. Surprisingly, they didn't choke so much as putting a strange, dull pain in my neck as I stood my ground.

  “Why do you now resist?” the lead cop said, head cocked in that way inquisitive puppies do. “Is it your familial connection that makes you deny separation?”

  “Of course it is,” I snarled. “You assholes understand family, right?”

  Bobby pulled at the pole around his neck. “Angels aren’t born, Frank, so they can be a bit dense about this sort of thing.” He looked at his minder. “We’re in this together so we’re going together!”

  “This cannot be allowed,” the angel said, sounding sincerely apologetic. “Robert is to be taken to be reminded of our laws by the sector judiciary and then released.” He looked down at me. “You, Franklin Butcher, are being taken to the One’s Gardens. If it enhances your comfort, know that your brother will not be harmed or punished, simply re-educated as to his responsibilities as a soul in Paradise.”

  Bobby let out a sigh. “Well, fuck it then.” He put his hand on my shoulder. “Don’t worry, man. I’ll be okay. You just take care of business, okay?” He squeezed, his ghostly flesh still warm. “Mom’s counting on you.”

  I was about to copy his gesture, but instead one-upped it, pulling him into a big hug. I had to give the dog boys this: they didn’t try to break it up or choke us out or anything. They let us take our time, make our good-byes, and separate.

  “Be safe, Bobby.” I forced myself to smile even though the absolute last thing I wanted was for them to take my brother away. It felt unfair, like we should get more time. “I love you.”

  “I love you too, Frank.” He shared my smile. As his own Cop Dog pulled him gently back, Bobby pointed at me. “Just don’t fuck this one up, ya know?”

  “I won’t. I promise.”

  After a moment, Bobby disappeared into the crowds even though I could still see his escort head-and-shoulders above the crowd. My own two guard dogs turned back toward the Gate and gave me a mild tug.

  “Come, Franklin Butcher. We must go.”

  “Yeah, yeah, I’m coming,” I bitched and went along with the angels. I wasn’t sure what their plan was, but I was hoping it was a damned sight better than the not plan I currently had. We queued up behind some souls out to see the sights or something, eventually coming up to the rippling liquid metal of the portal proper.

  “Do not fear,” one of the angels whispered. “The Angel Gates are completely safe.”

  I took a deep breath and set my jaw. “Don’t worry about me, big guy. I’ve got nothing to be afraid of.”

  Yeah, more big talk, but this time I was trying to believe it because if I didn’t, well, I might realize how fucking stupid I was, and that never ends well. After all, it’s never good to look at the odds until after you succeed when you’re about to do something stupid. You might psych yourself out, otherwise, and that was the absolute last thing I needed to do.

  As we stepped through the fluid and space warped around us, I reminded myself that I had to be rock solid from here on out. I had to fix this shit, one way or the other.

  After all, I did promise, and a Butcher sure as hell doesn’t break promises to family.

  19

  When we stepped onto the other side of the angelic Stargate, we were alone. The rest of the commuters that had been with us must have had very different destinations. After being constantly surrounded by hundreds, thousands of constantly chattering souls and the echo of the celestial chorus, it was a little unnerving to enter this much stillness. That was just the start of it though.

  I had no idea exactly where we were, except it was in front of an immense, almost overgrown hanging garden, one that would make the Second Wonder of the World give up the competition.

  A tiered, squared pyramid of alabaster, each layer was wide and deep enough to drive a car down, if you could somehow get through the lush, tangled plant life. Every kind of tree, bush, grass, and fern I knew of and a shit ton I didn’t grew across the immense structure. Each layer had segments I guessed matched up to various Earth environments, each with their own specific kinds of plants.

  Though the stark, shining perfection of the rest of Heaven had been impressive, this garden beat it, hands down. The colors, scents, and variety of the natural world, an entire world’s worth of life crammed into one place, was overwhelming. I was frozen in place for at l
east a straight minute. My guards seemed content to let me take it all in.

  Once my senses cleared and my brain caught up with everything, I let out a low whistle. “Nice digs.” I blinked a few more times just to make sure I was seeing things correctly and shook my head. “God’s place, right?”

  The head dog gave me another quizzical look. “This is God’s Garden and the seat of his power. If I understand your mortal parlance, then yes?” I guess beat cop angels weren’t quite as well versed as I’d expected.

  “There is no more time to tarry here,” the other angel growled. “Come, Franklin Butcher.”

  Like I had a choice. Still, I continued to play nicey-nice as we started toward the front gates. They were massive slabs of polished hardwood and banded with brushed gold, half-covered with flowers and vines. As we walked closer, those slabs shuddered, causing dirt and leaves to fall to the ground as the gates swung open. Guess God didn’t go for half measures or small gestures.

  The interior of the Garden was as vast and impressive as the outside. I feel like a broken record saying this again and again, but my grasp of the English language isn’t really extensive enough to truly describe the sheer majesty of the garden.

  Maybe it was the vast natural beauty seamlessly combined with perfectly designed architecture. Maybe it was the gold-inlaid mosaics that depicted scenes from the Bible and (I assume) other holy texts of the religions that fell under the One’s umbrella. Or maybe it was that overwhelming sense of the divine, that same indescribable presence every other god I had met exuded. It was stronger than the Greeks, but a small part of me realized it wasn’t much stronger than the sense of peace and joy I’d felt from Krishna.

  However you wanted to slice it, it was fucking amazing. Too bad, no matter how unfailingly polite my guides were, I couldn’t entirely forgive being led around with my neck in a noose. We walked deeper into the pyramid, down beautiful hallways, and ending up in front of a more mundane yet still magnificent door, just a bit larger than your typical household door.