Dani put a hand atop Sean’s and gave a squeeze. “We’ll help you find him, Sean.”
“Too much water under the bridge, I think. It’s been so long, he probably thinks I forgot about him.” His lips puckered. “He was my mini-me, you know? Always following after me, wanting to do whatever I was going to. It annoyed me at first, but then I realized how much of an effort he was putting into being my friend. I started to see him in a whole new light. When I asked why he wanted to hang out with a grumpy, surly teenager, he said being with me made him….” His eyes went wide and his nostrils flared. “He said he just liked me.”
It was more likely the truth that, once he’d hit puberty, Sean’s Omega probably started to make itself known, and Quinn liked being around him because Sean calmed him and made him feel good. At least that was the stories Gareth’s grandmother would tell.
“Dani’s right. We will find him.” Gareth reached out and stroked a hand over Sean’s shoulder. Such a simple gesture, but Gareth didn’t want to take his hand away. Like, ever. “He’s yours, and that makes him ours too. If he wants to be a part of our pack—of your life—he’s always welcome here.”
Those violet orbs had a sheen that broke Gareth’s heart. Eyes so beautiful should never have to be sad and—what the hell was he doing? He pulled his hand away, missing the contact immediately. There were so many things about Sean that defied possibility. Gareth’s wolf wanted a family, with Sean bearing children, which could never happen. When Gareth saw Sean, his heart quickened, he wanted to be near him, and his damn wolf was doing a fucking happy dance in his mind. Feelings—especially those beyond friendship—took time to develop. His insane need for Sean was just that—crazy.
“Alpha?”
He jerked his head up. “I’m sorry. Did you say something?”
Sean’s lip quirked. “I was asking if you were hungry. Dani is going to teach me some cooking basics, and you could be my guinea pig.”
Once more the thought of domesticity barreled into Gareth. He could picture Sean standing at the stove, mixing a pot of stew, while Gareth washed dishes. They’d glance at each other, and Sean would give Gareth that tiny hint of a smile that was his. He’d never seen it for anyone else, and Gareth loved thinking maybe it was meant just for him.
When Sean laughed, Gareth pulled his head out of the fantasy.
“Wow. When you go on a trip, you go all-out. Where were you?”
“Just thinking. What were you planning on cooking?”
Dani got up and rinsed out her cup. “I saw what he served before.” She mock-shuddered. “It was a good thing Caleb has a cast-iron stomach. I’m going to teach him to make scrambled eggs the right way. It’s probably one of the simplest dishes to start with.”
Gareth grinned. “And what are you serving with the eggs?”
She gave an exaggerated roll of her eyes as she turned off the water, then went for the refrigerator, where she began pulling things out and putting them on the counter. “Sausage and bacon, of course. And we’ll even make you some hash browns and smother them in pepper jack cheese.”
Sean shook his head. “I never agreed to that. He’s going to get the eggs and be damn happy he got them.” Then he flushed and his eyes opened wide. “I apologize, Alpha. Of course, I was teasing. I would make anything you like.”
Sean started to stand, and Gareth reached out and snatched his hand, holding him still. Sean turned toward Gareth, and there was uncertainty there. He was trying to find his place, and Gareth needed to assure him he had.
“You can tease me, Sean. I don’t mind.” He tilted his head to indicate Dani. “I’m used to it, trust me.”
“Don’t think I don’t know you pointed at me, Alpha.”
“She’s a mother. Eyes-in-the-back-of-her-head type, you know. She caught me in the refrigerator once, sampling the hors d’oeuvres she put together for the pack gathering we have before the full moon.”
Dani spun on her heel. “He ate the whole tray! I worked damn hard on those, and he had them gone within minutes.”
“Well, what did you expect me to do? They were mini bacon quiches!” He stuck his bottom lip out, hoping to get on Dani’s good side. For an added bonus, he batted his eyes. “You know how I love those.”
Sean snickered, which took a load off Gareth’s mind.
Dani blew out a breath. “I told you, I would make you quiche every day if you wanted.” She beckoned to Sean, who went and stood by her side. “He doesn’t ask me for things, at least not normally. He’s not a fussy eater, but he does love meat of all kinds.” She looked over her shoulder and glared at Gareth. “And before your mind goes to that dirty place, that’s not what I was talking about.”
Now it was time for Gareth to chuckle. “Who, me?”
She shook her head and went back to showing Sean how to make breakfast. Gareth sat there and watched them. The surprise on Sean’s face when Dani told him they’d need two dozen eggs—mostly for Caleb, of course—three packages of bacon and sausage—for Caleb, but the biggest chunk would be for Gareth—and two pounds of hash browns, was amusing as hell. They worked well together, with Sean hanging on her every word. When she had him cracking eggs, he was so hesitant, he ended up bobbling two of them, and they fell and smashed on the floor.
“I’m sorry! I’m… nervous. I don’t want to disappoint anyone.” He sighed as he pushed the egg carton back toward the wall. “Maybe this isn’t for me.”
“Nonsense. Don’t give up, Sean. Cooking is an art, and it takes time to perfect. You’ve made eggs before, but I’m going to show you the right way to do them. Now, let’s try again, and this time, we’ll go at your pace.”
Dani was incredibly patient, and that was one of the things that made Gareth want her as his counsel. She took her time, never chiding, only making suggestions. While Sean continued his work with the eggs, Dani put two trays of bacon and sausage into the oven. After a few more tries, and with lots of encouragement for her obviously nervous pupil, Sean was able to get all the eggs cracked and whisked. He practically glowed at his accomplishment.
“Now comes the fun part. We’re going to cook them. The incredible thing about eggs is they’re so versatile. Even something as simple as scrambled can take on new flavors with the addition of a few ingredients. Some people like to add things like cream cheese to make them richer. Others like to melt Fontina or Gruyère inside. Maybe they’ll throw in some mushrooms, peppers, or onions. They can be whatever you want.”
“What does Caleb like? I figure I owe him a lot for helping me out.”
She laughed. “Caleb likes food. To be honest, I’m not sure he really tastes it. He holds the plate up and inhales it, pattern and all. But he loves eggs and cheese, so you can’t really go wrong with that.”
Sean turned and bit his lip as he regarded Gareth. “What do you like in your eggs, Alpha?”
“Whatever you’re making is fine. As long as there’s bacon and sausage, I’m happy.”
Sean’s eyes brightened. “What if we chop up some of the meat and put that in the eggs, along with some cheese? Will that work?”
Gareth’s stomach growled, and Dani snickered. “I think that’s your answer. Gareth likes that idea.”
The beatific smile made Gareth’s tummy flutter. An Alpha, the biggest and baddest wolf, and his stomach was turned to mush by some pretty white teeth, soft, pillowy lips, and violet eyes.
You like Sean, don’t you?
Lyram’s words came back to Gareth. It should be impossible to have feelings for Sean beyond the ones he did for any other pack member, but Gareth had to admit, he totally did.
“OH MY God, those were amazing.”
Breakfast was over, with evidence of the frenzy everywhere. Empty bowls of eggs, with one overturned on the table, the plates that had held bacon and sausage practically licked clean, and four people sat back as they patted their stomachs.
“I’m going to have to go on a run so I can work that meal off.” Caleb smiled at Sean. “Thank
you for breakfast, Sean. Anytime you want to cook, just know that I’ll be happy for you to feed me.”
Sean’s cheeks heated. “Oh, your mom did most of it. I only—”
“Don’t do that.” Gareth leaned in closer and put a hand atop Sean’s. “I sat here and watched as the two of you worked together to create this meal. You might have been doing what Dani said, but you were the one who pulled it all together. Caleb is thanking you, and the gracious thing to do is accept it with a smile.”
Sean wanted to say words. He wanted to tell Caleb he was happy to have cooked, but…. He couldn’t take his eyes off Gareth’s hand, which engulfed his own. The hand was remarkable. Where Sean’s were slender, almost delicate, Gareth’s were thick, blunt, and had a strength to them. He wanted to stroke Gareth’s hand, or to have Gareth stroke his. Sean wished to feel the power they held as they—
“Sean?”
He snapped his head up, seeing Dani looking at him expectantly.
“Are you okay?”
He glanced down and found he was still holding Gareth’s hand. His stomach churned as he drew his away. “I’m sorry, Alpha.”
Gareth sighed. “Clear the room, please.”
Caleb and Dani were on their feet in an instant. Sean made to stand, but Gareth pinned him with a stare. “Not you, Sean. We need to talk.”
As soon as Dani and Caleb were gone, Gareth stood and poured himself another cup of coffee, then turned and filled Sean’s again.
“Can you tell me what has you so freaked out?”
“I—I didn’t mean to hold your hand. I just….” He clamped his mouth shut. Nothing he could say would make this okay.
Gareth put the pot back on the warmer, then sat down and took Sean’s hand in his. “You just… needed the comfort? The human touch? How long were you without, Sean? A wolf needs their pack. They give them strength enough to go on. When Dani’s husband died, there wasn’t a pack member who wasn’t there for her. They cooked, they sat with her, they comforted her when she needed it. Who touched you last, Sean?”
“You, Alpha.”
“And before me?”
Sean had to think. Had anyone ever really touched him? His parents weren’t nurturing, and the only other person in Sean’s life had been…
“My brother.”
Gareth squeezed slightly. “And that was how many years ago? Do you know how strong you must be not to have gone mad from not being touched or held? I could never do what you did. I need the contact with the people in Lydon every day. We’re always very free with our affections. I believe that once you feel you’re truly safe here, you’ll accept it more readily.”
Accept it? Didn’t he understand? He thought he did feel safe, but maybe that was an illusion.
“My old pack was different. Ryker was anything but a nurturer. You did everything you could to avoid letting him see you, because once he had his sights set on you, he would have what he wanted.”
“So he raped people. That is what you’re saying, right?”
The screams. Sean could still hear people as they begged for help. “Yes.” He’d wanted to stop Ryker, but Sean’s parents had said the Alpha could do what he wanted and that Sean should never get involved. He’d done exactly that, doing his best to ignore the kids who went missing, to block out the whimpers in the night.
“I understand now.”
How could he? How could anyone? “What do you mean?”
“Do you feel safe here? In Lydon?”
“Yes, Alpha. I can sleep again without having too many dreams, and even the ones I have don’t have me curled up in a corner somewhere.”
Gareth rubbed his hand over his eyes. “I swear to you, Ryker will pay for what he’s done. For now, though, will you trust me for fifteen minutes?”
A month ago, Sean would have said no way in hell. Alphas were never to be trusted, a lesson that had been beaten into him. But Gareth had done what he said he would. He worked to ensure Sean felt safe.
“I do.”
“Good. Come with me.”
He got up and held out a hand. Sean reached for it, then pulled away.
“Trust me, Sean.”
A leap of faith was needed here. He took a deep breath, then grabbed Gareth’s hand. As soon as they made contact, the familiar warmth of Gareth’s skin washed over Sean. Who was this man that he affected Sean so?
“Good. Let’s go.”
Gareth led them through the living room and out the double doors that overlooked the forest. Sean inhaled, loving the scent of the pines, especially when it blended with Gareth’s own musky-sweet smell.
“I want you to stand here and close your eyes.”
Sean did as his Alpha bade him.
“Good. Now just relax. I want you to take deep, even breaths. Inhale through your nose, exhale through your mouth.”
As soon as Sean closed his eyes, the sounds of Gareth moving caught his attention. “Alpha?”
A firm grip on his shoulder grounded Sean in the moment.
“I’m not going anywhere, I promise. Keep breathing. Inhale. Hold-two-three-four. Exhale. Now I want you to keep that up.”
Gareth’s other hand went to Sean’s opposite shoulder and stroked over it. Sean groaned as the muscles Gareth worked loosened. He’d never realized how much tension his body held until this moment. Even when he was certain he was safe, the fear never let go of him.
“Wolves in the wild need touch with their pack. They eat together, sleep together, live and die together. They help each other out, and in that, they find a unity of purpose. We are a melding of wolf and human, both species that thrive on tactile sensations. What this means is, we need the touch more than either of our parts.”
He moved one hand to Sean’s lower back, and the other to his upper.
“And you, who have never known a gentle touch beyond your own brother, need it more than anyone I’ve ever known.”
It was true. Sean relished the times Quinn had hugged him. He soaked up the feelings, and they calmed him.
He turned and threw himself into Gareth’s arms, pleased when they enfolded him.
“See? There’s nothing wrong here. You needed the touch, and I did too. I quite like a hug now and then.”
When Sean realized he was hugging an Alpha—his Alpha—he tried to step back, but Gareth held fast.
“Stop. You said you trust me, so I need you to keep doing this. Hug me, Sean. We can share warmth, and you can start getting used to the feelings, because I guarantee you, Dani will want to touch you. So will Caleb. In fact, when you’re out in town, a lot of people will want to hug you. We’re a huggy bunch, you know.”
Sean sighed and melted into the embrace. Gareth was right, Sean did need this. A balm to his battered heart and spirit. Even his wolf sat up and paid attention. If Sean didn’t know better, he would swear it was smiling.
Chapter Eleven
FOUR DAYS later, Gareth sat in his office, preparing to go through the applications he’d rejected previously. He felt no small amount of shame for his reasons in turning these people down. The ones who had no marketable skills had been dismissed without further review. He never bothered to look deeper than the surface. In his quest to be the best pack, he’d forgotten the things that made one great—commitment, loyalty, love. He took the printed copies from a file and laid them out on his desk.
One by one he read through the applicants’ histories. Jenna Kaminski was a waitress in her old pack. Gareth had decided they didn’t need anyone, so he put her in the rejected pile. Today he would work on correcting his mistakes. He reached for his phone and dialed Wolfgang.
“Good morning, Alpha. What can I do for you today?”
“I’ve got a woman who wants to join our pack. She’s a server. Do you have openings?”
“Do I! We had two human servers quit in order to go back to school. They were excellent, and it hurt for them to leave. We most certainly need the staffing.”
A realization flashed through Gareth’s mind. He
’d been allowing shops in town to hire humans instead of finding wolves who could use the job. Yet another gut-punch for him. He had the opportunity to make the lives of wolves all over better, simply by allowing them to become part of the pack.
“Thank you, Wolfgang. I’ll contact her right away.”
“Alpha?”
“Yes?”
Wolfgang took a deep breath. “You know, we could use servers, cooks, dishwashers, and bus help. The wolves who live and work in Lydon tend to stay on the job longer than humans who need to commute here. We get a lot of visitor traffic into town from neighboring areas, but our remoteness makes it hard for those who need to drive to work here. I… I think it would be helpful if we took in more people. I know at least ten shops that could use the help.”
Gareth bit back a sharp retort. “Why didn’t you ever mention this to me?”
“Because you’re the Alpha!”
Of course. Pack politics were such that the Alpha was always right. That was the same bullshit that got Sean where he was today. It was wrong to question or contradict the Alpha. Gareth hated that his pack held the same opinions. That would have to change.
“No. If you have ideas, you will present them to me or Lyram. There will be no hesitation. I’m forming a council to help me as we open our area to more wolves. They will contact the pack members for their input. No suggestion—at least not a serious one—will be dismissed. Even if I’m against it, the council will have a voice. I am not perfect. The fact that I had my head up my ass about who to admit proves that.” He softened his tone. “Please, Wolfgang, never be afraid to talk to me. I don’t want there to be a division between us. I might be the Alpha, but my job is to serve my pack. I can’t do that if no one talks to me.”
“Then maybe we should….”
“Go on.”
“Why not take in any wolf that petitions to join? Those who might not have marketable skills can be trained. Some people, like say authors or musicians, make people happy with their works. Just because they can’t be the pretty face in the public eye doesn’t make them any less valuable to a well-rounded town. What person wouldn’t like to go to the bookstore and find something by a local artist next to a John Grisham novel?”
The Night Wolf Page 10
