“Not if I can help it.” I was trying to remember going to bed the night before.
Landon pinched my rear. “I’ll make it worth your while.”
I pushed sleepy clouds from my mind. “What time did you get in last night?”
“It was after midnight.”
“Why didn’t you wake me up?”
“You looked so cute, all curled up with your Kindle in your fuzzy pajamas,” Landon said. “I didn’t want to ruin the moment.”
“What did you guys do yesterday?”
“The usual stuff. Mall. A few antique stores. We went to an Irish pub for dinner and drinks afterward. What did you do?”
I told him about my visits with Mrs. Little, Edith and Chief Terry. He was impressed. “You had a busy day.”
“Yeah. We still don’t know what’s really going on, though,” I said.
“We have more information,” Landon said. “That’s always a good thing.”
“I guess.”
“Wait a second … Chief Terry wasn’t sure I was good enough for you?”
“He says you’re a good man now; that’s all that matters,” I replied.
“I am a good man,” he agreed, pulling me closer. “I’m the best man. I was thinking you could let me prove that to you.”
“Oh, yeah? What did you have in mind? Because breakfast in bed sounds great,” I teased.
“You wound me.”
“Sorry.”
“What about Aunt Tillie? Did she drink the truth potion?”
“No,” I grumbled. “She did everything but. She hid in her pot field all afternoon.”
“I told you not to mention the pot field,” Landon growled.
I hadn’t meant to mention the pot field. I’m not on top of my game in the morning. “Sorry. I forgot your oath thing.”
“What oath?”
“To protect and serve.”
“That’s cops.”
“Do no harm?”
“That’s doctors.”
“Be prepared?”
“That’s boy scouts.”
“I give up.”
“Well, other than your investigation yesterday, did you have a nice day?”
“It was great being away from your mother and Blanche.” Wait. Did I just say that out loud? That’s one of those things you keep to yourself.
Landon stiffened. “I know she’s been difficult … .”
“I don’t know why I said that.”
“You’re still half asleep,” Landon said, climbing out of bed. “I’ll give you a pass.”
He was angry. I scrambled out of bed, grabbing his arm before he could open the bedroom door. “I’m really sorry. That was a horrible thing to say.”
Landon sighed. “It’s okay. It’s not like she’s been nice to you.” He brushed his lips against my forehead. “Let’s get some coffee into you.”
I followed him out into living room, finding Thistle and Marcus snuggling on the couch.
“Hey, Marcus,” I said. “We haven’t seen much of you this past week.”
“The festival has been a nightmare,” he admitted. “It’s like a nonstop parade of crap that needs to be done – and guess who gets to do it?”
“You?”
“Yup.”
“The only good thing about it is that Thistle has missed me, which makes her more … pliable.”
I smirked. “Is that true? Are you more pliable?”
“I went all out last night,” Thistle agreed, frowning as the words escaped her mouth. “That’s not what I meant.”
Landon laughed from behind the kitchen counter, where he was dishing ground coffee into the filter and starting a pot. “I guess Bay isn’t the only Winchester woman with a muddled brain this morning.”
“Just how much did you miss me?” Marcus teased.
“So much that I put The Notebook in the other night just so I could have a good cry,” Thistle admitted. Her mouth dropped open in surprise. She would never admit something like that.
What the hell?
Marcus was obviously shocked. “That’s really sweet. Well, not the crying part, but the other part.”
“That is really sweet,” I said. “And so unlike you.”
“Oh, really? What did you do last week when Landon’s case kept him away for three nights in a row?”
“I pretended my pillow was him so I had something to cuddle with,” I answered. Crap.
Thistle dropped her head into her hands. “Oh, no!”
“How did she find out?”
“She’s evil. She has her ways.”
“What are we talking about?” Landon asked.
“The truth spell,” I replied. “Aunt Tillie turned it around on us.”
Landon glanced over from the other room. “Wait, are you saying that you’ve been cursed to tell the truth?”
“Yes.”
“Oh, well, this could be fun,” he said, sauntering into the living room with a cup of coffee in his hand. He settled into the big armchair at the edge of the rug and fixed me with a hard look. “What’s your favorite color?”
“Purple.”
“What’s your favorite movie?”
“The Goonies.”
“How many guys have you slept with?”
“Five.”
“You told me three. Why did you say three before?”
“Because I didn’t want you to think I was a slut.” I sank to the floor. “This is a nightmare.”
“I like it.”
Marcus decided to play the game with Thistle. “How many guys have you slept with?”
“Eight.”
“You said five. Why did you pick five?”
“You always pick a lower number when you’re a girl.” Thistle shot me a murderous look. “We have to counteract this spell.”
“We can’t,” I said. “You know it lasts for twenty-four hours.”
“Then we’re going to have to shut ourselves in this house until it passes,” Thistle said. “Landon is going to have to go up to the inn and tell them we’re sick.”
“Aren’t you overreacting?” Landon asked.
Thistle furrowed her brow. “We have to answer any question we’re asked with the truth,” Thistle said. “Do you know how dangerous that is?”
“I’m with the FBI, I like truth.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
“Bay, what do you think of Landon’s mother?” Thistle asked pointedly.
“I think she’s mean and she wishes Landon wouldn’t have settled for someone like me.” Sonofabitch!
Landon glanced over the chair’s arm and met my gaze. “I didn’t settle for anyone. Stop thinking like that.”
I buried my head between my knees miserably. “This is horrible.”
Landon reached over and rubbed the top of my head. “What are the odds that anyone will ask you a dangerous question?”
“With your family and my family locked in one room together? What do you think?”
Landon blew out a sigh. “It will be fine.”
“It will be fine,” Thistle mimicked.
“Is that supposed to sound like me?”
“That’s how your voice sounds in my head sometimes,” Thistle said. “You’re bossy.”
Landon leaned forward. “What do you really think about me?”
Thistle frowned, fighting the urge to answer. She wasn’t strong enough, though. “I think you make Bay happy and you’re really sweet to her so I like you. Dammit!”
Landon smirked. “I knew it.”
We all turned when the front door of the guesthouse opened and Clove slipped in, clad in the same clothes she’d worn the day before. “What are you guys doing up so early?”
“Landon woke me up for sex,” I admitted.
“Marcus woke me up for sex, too.”
Clove frowned. “What’s going on?”
“The truth spell backfired,” I replied.
“We’re the ones who have to tell the truth,”
Thistle added.
All hints of color washed from Clove’s face. “Are you sure?”
“No, we’re making it up because we like being miserable,” I grumbled.
Clove reopened the door and started to move back in the direction she’d just come from.
“Where are you going?” Thistle asked.
“I can’t be around you guys if I have to tell the truth. You’ll find out what I’ve been doing. I have to get out of here.” Clove squeaked and slammed the door shut.
Thistle and I exchanged incredulous looks. We were on our feet and racing toward the door in seconds. Clove was already in her car and backing down the driveway before we hit the front porch.
“I knew she was up to something,” Thistle complained. “I knew it.”
“She’s going to hide all day.”
“Which means we’re going to be on the hot seat,” Thistle said. “Alone.”
Marcus and Landon were watching Sports Center when we walked back in the room.
“You don’t seem upset about this,” I said.
“I’m concerned,” Landon said. “I don’t think it’s the end of the world, though. Marcus and I will run interference up at the inn. If anyone asks you a question, we’ll interrupt really quickly and ask you another question.”
“What if I say something stupid in front of your mother?”
Landon reached over, tumbling me into his lap and wrapping his arms around me. “I’ll just tell her you’re drunk.”
“It’s not even nine in the morning yet. She’ll think I’m an alcoholic.”
“You’re right. You’re randy when you’re drunk,” Landon said. “I’ll tell her you’re high.”
“Is that better?”
Landon gave me a quick kiss. “I guess we’ll find out.”
Will this week ever end?
“I have one more question,” Landon said.
“I’m not answering any more questions,” I said. “You’re taking advantage.”
“It’s not a bad question,” Landon said. “It’s about something you said the other day, when you were talking about Kenneth.”
“What did I say?”
“You said he had a magic penis.”
“So? What does that have to do with anything?”
Landon waggled his eyebrows. “Do I have a magic penis? And, more importantly, do you want to spend quality time with my magic penis before breakfast?”
Crap.
Nineteen
“We can still go back to the guesthouse,” Thistle offered.
We were at the back door of the inn, Marcus and Landon leaning against the wall of the house, watching us. They seemed more amused than anything else.
“Am I the hottest guy you’ve ever slept with?” Marcus asked Thistle suddenly.
“Ooh, that’s a good question,” Landon said.
“Yes,” Thistle replied through gritted teeth.
Landon opened his mouth, a similar question on his lips, but I cut him off. “Don’t you dare!”
Landon opened the door without knocking. He’d been at the inn enough times to know that my mother and aunts would already be in the kitchen. He wasn’t expecting to find Aunt Tillie sitting on the couch.
“Don’t you knock?”
“I figured you were already at the table,” he replied.
“Obviously not.”
“Obviously.”
Aunt Tillie glanced over her shoulder, eyeing Thistle and me with an evil grin. “And how are you this fine and sunny morning, my dear nieces?”
“Sucky,” Thistle said.
“Terrible,” I replied.
“Why?”
“Because you’re an evil, evil woman,” Thistle said. “We know what you did.”
“I should hope so,” Aunt Tillie said. “It wouldn’t be a very effective punishment if you didn’t know who did it to you.”
“How did you know what we were doing?” I asked.
“I helped raise you,” Aunt Tillie said, turning back to the television. “You wouldn’t be the nieces I raised if you didn’t try something like this.”
“Can you take the curse off of us now? We’ve learned our lesson.”
“No.”
“Why not?” Thistle whined.
“It’s for twenty-four hours. You know that.”
“What happens if someone from Landon’s family asks a question that puts us in an awkward situation?” I pressed.
“You should’ve thought of that before you tried to trick me,” Aunt Tillie said. “Your mothers are waiting in the kitchen.”
Thistle flipped the bird at Aunt Tillie’s back before moving toward the kitchen door.
“I saw that.”
“Good.”
Mom, Marnie and Twila were busy at the stove, and barely glanced at the four of us as we entered.
“What’s for breakfast?” I asked.
“Blueberry pancakes, sausage, eggs and fruit,” Mom said, glancing up. “Good morning, boys.”
“Good morning,” they replied in unison.
“Where’s Clove?” Marnie asked.
“She snuck in at the crack of dawn and then ran out before we could question her,” Thistle replied.
I shot her a dark look. We gave each other a hard time whenever possible – and it was just the three of us. We lied as a unit where our mothers were concerned, though. Thistle had just thrown Clove under the bus, whether she meant to or not.
“Where was she?” Marnie asked.
“I don’t know.”
“You don’t think she was doing anything dangerous, do you?”
“I don’t know,” Thistle replied. “I have no idea who she was doing or if he was dangerous.”
“Thistle,” I warned.
Mom smiled tightly. “Boys, why don’t you go and get settled in the next room. We’ll be out with breakfast in a few minutes.”
Landon looked torn. “I think Bay should stay close to me this morning.”
“Why?”
“I didn’t get to spend any time with her yesterday and I missed her,” Landon lied.
Mom smiled widely. “You’re so sweet. I think you can go five minutes without her, though.”
Landon looked at me, still unsure. “What do you think?”
“I think they’re going to grill us about Clove and then find out about the truth spell anyway, so it doesn’t really matter.”
Ugh!
Mom narrowed her eyes. “What truth spell?”
“We tried to cast a truth spell on Aunt Tillie yesterday so we could find out whether she murdered Floyd, and she found out about it and rebounded it back to us,” Thistle answered. “And we hate her for it.”
Well, it wasn’t a lie.
Mom mimed words but no sound came out of her mouth.
“I don’t even know what to say,” Twila said.
“I wish I had that problem,” Thistle admitted.
“Wait, are you sure?” Marnie moved in front of Thistle. “Who stole my black bra when you guys were in middle school?”
“I did,” Thistle said.
“Why?”
“Clove liked Michael Windsor and she didn’t think her boobs were big enough,” I answered. “We filled it with balloons full of pudding for her. It backfired when he tried to grab one, though, and it exploded. The pudding stained the bra and we burned it.”
I felt like crying. Landon’s shoulders shook with silent laughter as he rubbed my back.
“Oh, well, this could be useful,” Mom said, fixing me with a pointed look. “Where did you really go after the senior prom?”
“I ditched my date and threw a party on the bluff,” I replied. “We got drunk and skinny dipped in the pond with the Baker boys.”
“Bay!” Thistle’s face was beet red.
“The Baker boys?” Marcus wrinkled his nose distastefully. “I went to school with them. I’m so grossed out.”
“And did you drug us that night so we would fall asleep?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“Because we missed our curfew.”
“By how much?”
“Eight hours.”
Mom smiled. “You’re grounded.”
“Fine,” I grumbled. “Can it start now? Send me to my guesthouse.”
“No.” Mom shook her head. “Now you have breakfast with our guests.”
“And what if they ask us something that we shouldn’t answer?”
“Oh,” Twila said, realization dawning. “This could be bad.”
Marnie chewed her lower lip. “This could be really bad.”
“I already have a plan,” Landon said. “If anyone asks them a question anyone deems … dangerous, someone else just ask them a different question really quickly.”
Mom looked doubtful. “I don’t know.”
“Well, my other idea is to say they’re high.”
“That could work.” Twila brightened considerably.
She always did have a weird sense of humor.
“SO, WHERE is Clove?” Daryl asked, forking a bite of pancakes into his mouth.
“Thistle, can you hand me the butter?” Marnie asked quickly.
“Yes.”
“Clove had things to do at the store,” Mom said, filling in the awkward conversation gap.
“Oh, that’s too bad,” Daryl replied. “I was hoping maybe she could give me a tour of the grounds later.”
Landon’s eyes narrowed suspiciously. “Why?”
“What do you mean why? I want to see the grounds.”
“I’ll show you the grounds,” Landon said.
“You know the grounds?”
“I’ve seen quite a bit of them, yes,” Landon said.
“Did you give him a tour of the grounds?” Connie turned to me.
“Not really,” I said before anyone could ask another question. “Landon snuck on the grounds to spy on us one night and found my mother and aunts dancing naked under the full moon. Then, when we thought Marcus was a murderer, we took him up to the bluff so we could save Thistle before he stabbed her. Oh, and then there was the time Aunt Tillie was plotting to infest the Dragonfly with magical bugs so it couldn’t open on time. He got to see some of the woods then, too.”
“Magical bugs?” Connie asked.
“Figure of speech,” Marnie said.
“They weren’t magical,” Aunt Tillie replied. “They were regular bugs.”
“It sounds like you guys have a lot of … fun out here,” Earl said.
Something to Witch About (Wicked Witches of the Midwest Book 5) Page 12
