She began by admitting she wasn’t her mother. She’d actually been her live-in nanny, working for an Elite socialite. The original Julia had never been healthy. She had a bad heart, a birth defect that the lady of the house, her mother, did not want to acknowledge. She insisted all the tests had showed a perfect baby and that Julia was simply a true lady, fragile but not in need of a heart transplant. And yet she knew it in her heart not to be true, and she decided to order a clone.
It took several years for the clone to develop into a beautiful girl, even though the artificial growth rate had been highly enhanced.
The day came when the mother signed the papers to have her daughter put to death, and the clone sent to the house, all memories transferred from one to the other. The new girl was full of life, but she never went to her mother for affection or attention. When she scraped her knee or wanted to show off, she always went to her nanny.
Eventually, the lady felt as if she had a stranger in the house, not her beautiful pet girl. The original Julia had always been there, quiet and smiling timidly, pleased to be hugged between her mother’s appointments.
Regret ate at her heart that she’d put her sweet, gentle little girl to death in order to get this boisterous, dirty tyrant, who was turning her immaculate house into a circus.
One day, the lady came to the nanny and discussed with her the options. Together, they decided it was better to send the clone away with her nanny under the guise of a tragic accident. After all, she was the living image of Julia and she deserved a chance to live. But the lady simply could not have her there in her presence any longer. She paid the nanny a handsome fee for her silence, lest bad fortune follow them both.
To the rest of the city, Julia perished in a terrible accident while her clone, becoming Jules, came to live with her new mother in the Servers’ compound, far away from the Elites that would recognize her.
“How could you do that to me? Not telling me anything all these years?” Jules asked, her tears flowing openly down her cheeks.
“What could I say? You were so little when we left, not even five. It was for your own good, my darling.”
“You could have told me later on, when I was able to understand. You had no right to hide from me who I was.”
“How would that have helped you? So you could track down your real mother and maybe get yourself killed? When we left, she told me never to come back. That was not an empty threat. We should be grateful we were allowed to live. Jules, I love you so much, I was just happy to have the chance to be with you and raise you. I sacrificed my life for you, can’t you see?”
“I can see the lies you fed me. And I can remember how you brought in that horrible man, and how you ignored me, not wanting to see what was happening in our own home, his advances, and his dirty looks in my directions. How could you do that to me if you loved me?’
“I’m so sorry. I wanted so much to have a family. When he came into our lives, I was so happy. I just thought he cared about you, because he was nice to you.”
“Oh, how naïve can you be, mother!” Jules sighed. “I’ve been trying to tell myself it’s over now, and he’s gone. Tell me the truth, weren’t you repulsed by me, being a clone?”
“How could I be repulsed? You brought joy to my life. I felt sorry for Julia, a little sick child, but when you came to the house, you were so full of energy, so playful, you had a great imagination. You changed me. You made me laugh, you came to me for hugs, and we played together. You were like a daughter to me, from the moment I set my eyes on you.”
“I don’t know who I am anymore, mother. I feel lost. Every time I had to clean up after a human being was replaced by a clone at the hospital, I felt so angry seeing clones taking over one’s life. It didn’t seem right. I hated them. And look at me now. I’m one of them. What can I do with myself? How will I live with this?”
“Jules, you are a human being. Not a machine, not a manufactured product, not a toy or an object. You are as human as I am. Don’t let your anger hide from you the fact that you are human. You came from an embryo that had its DNA replaced with someone else’s, that’s all.”
“But that girl had to die in order for me to come to life. How can I live with the fact I took someone else’s life?”
“You did no such thing. Besides, Julia was very sick, her mother waited too long to make a decision to have a heart transplant done. The poor little thing was very weak. It might have worked, the transplant, but the choice was not yours or mine. Think about it, you had a chance at life, and they granted you that chance. Enjoy it, my darling. You are alive and strong and smart.”
“And I have no place to live, no escape door to a different world. My life is doomed, nothing is in sight to make it better.”
“You have just as many chances as any of us. What’s in store for me? Work and lonely years ahead, with just the idea that one day I might decide to go to the Happy Endings clinic, to put an end to my life, either sick or depressed.”
“Don’t talk like that. You’re still young.”
“You are even younger, darling. My hope is that you will have a better life.”
“How can it be better?”
“You have a lot of energy and are very smart. Who’s to say you can’t make life for the Servers better, or that you can’t help change the human replacement practices you hate so much? The future is yours.”
“Mother, I love you so much.”
“I love you, too. Will you stay here with me?”
“I can’t right now. One day, maybe I will want to come back,” Jules smiled.
“I’ll live with that hope then.”
“And don’t even think about Happy Endings, all right?”
Mother and daughter ended their conversation in a tight embrace.
14
The next day at dawn, Lan and Tom were already on their way back to the city. Tom was very concerned that Thomas would find out Lan hadn’t been out partying after all.
“Who knows whether he’s got somebody on your tail? Have you thought of that?” he asked Lan in a somewhat angry voice. “These are dangerous times, boy. You have to be extremely careful from now on.”
“Would you mind not calling me a boy?” Lan asked, feeling slightly annoyed at Tom’s tone of voice. “I don’t like it, and I suspect Allan resented it too. It’s condescending.”
Tom appeared taken aback. “Allan never mentioned that to me. I’m sorry if that made you feel uncomfortable. I’m so used to seeing him, and now you, as a young boy.” He paused for a bit before continuing, “I have to tell you; seeing the two of you together is very confusing for me. I was going to say when did you grow up so soon, but then, I was addressing Allan, not you. And yet, you are my son, too. I guess I’ll need a bit more time to find the proper way to talk to you in a way that’s appropriate.”
“I understand perfectly how you feel,” Lan decided to open himself up to this man, his father. “In my mind I keep calling you Tom. I thought Thomas was my real father, but then it turns out you’re my real father, and yet neither of you are my father, or maybe both of you are. It’s really screwed up.”
“You’re right. A complete mess… And guess what? We have to make sense of it all very soon, because they’ll find out about us sooner or later.”
“Do you know that when I came to the house last night, I wasn’t entirely sure I was a clone?” Lan felt the need to continue on the topic they had started. “Part of me still wanted to believe that this was a game of sorts. I mean, everything Allan had told me made perfect sense, and logically I was convinced. Emotionally, I was a wreck. I felt totally lost and alone, scared and nervous that I would die any minute. Do all clones go through the same agony like I am?”
“No, not as far as I know,” Tom replied. “According to my knowledge, the clones don’t even know what they are. Imagine how you felt the day after you’ve been brought home to live with Thomas, the thought never entered your mind until Allan told you otherwise, right? I believe tha
t is the standard. I’m not saying that the family members haven’t noticed some minor changes in temperament, or that there was no adjustment period, but I haven’t heard of any major problems with clones slipping right into life as if nothing happened. For all intended purposes, they were the originals brought back to life.”
The two stayed silent for a time. “That’s very troubling to me,” Lan said eventually. “How come the members of their families haven’t realized they were dealing with different human beings altogether? How come you never suspected anything in your position of power? You could have said something, done something.”
“But I didn’t know for sure, Lan. I’m looking in retrospect now. I don’t remember any instance when an original and a clone lived their lives in parallel. Even now, I can’t tell whether you’re just Allan continuing on a different path, as if you’d lived in a parallel universe.”
“That’s absurd! I’m not Allan, can’t you see? I am a human being who had been dreaming desperate dreams in a tube filled with fluid, waiting to be awakened. An enslaved human being, not even knowing it… I can’t even begin to imagine myself in suspended animation, waiting for the tube to rise so I could escape.” Lan actually started to cry, angry over the thought of his prison.
“Lan, it’s over now. You are free, my son. It’s over.” Tom’s unsteady voice, as if fighting back his own tears, brought Lan back to the present.
“You’re right, it’s over. But my whole life has been altered by the knowledge of who I am. Nobody could ever understand me, except maybe Jules. She must be devastated. I’d like to believe that she’ll be all right. I should have stayed, to wait for her to come back.”
“Out of the question, Lan. You need to go back now. We’ll see each other soon enough. And I’ll let you know about Jules’ situation. She’s very strong, an admirable girl. And you two appear to have more in common than any of us thought.”
“You may be right. If she can make it, so can I.”
On that note, they got close to the edge of the forest, behind the Server compound, and Lan said goodbye to his father. With his mind still in turmoil, he decided to call him Tom from then on, not yet comfortable calling him father.
15
Sunday morning was bright and cloudless. Allan woke up feeling rested and at peace for the first time in days. He went downstairs to find David and Daniel eating in the kitchen, while Mel’s voice could be heard outside feeding the chickens their breakfast.
“Scrambled eggs again?” he asked.
“There’s a good supply of those from our feathery friends outside,” David mumbled, with his mouth full. “Help yourself.” He pointed towards the stovetop, where a pan was still half full.
“Where are Lan and my father?”
“Tom went to help Lan through the forest,” Daniel replied. “He’ll be back soon.”
Sure enough, a short while after that, Tom came in and joined them at the table. “So, Allan, can I ask you more about the Imaginarium?”
“We should probably wait for Mel to join us,” Daniel intervened. “She’d be upset if we started without her.” He went outside to help Mel finish her work.
They moved to the living room to have more space, and Allan started to recollect his actions from a few days before. He told them about the sequence of events in the War of Sovereign Nations game. He talked about Brad and his traditional warfare approach. Then he moved onto Brent’s cyber-attacks and nuclear war scenario.
Allan explained his own strategy and how the food had been laced with addictive chemicals, dulling people’s minds, and he mentioned the great entertainment that would distract the people whose country he was planning to conquer.
“Thus, when my troops landed, nobody cared about what was happening to their country. They had lost any desire to fight, freedom becoming an empty word. I won without a shot being fired. In a way, it was less satisfying because there was no real war, as if I had been cheated of a fair victory,” Allan concluded his story.
The others had been listening carefully, absorbing every word. After the story ended, everybody was quiet for a while, as if they were still under the influence of the emotions they felt as the story unfolded.
“Very interesting,” Tom started. “The scenario you played brought about the similar results I’ve seen in the city. You remember me talking about our citizens, especially the Servers, losing interest in life, their whole existence centered on entertainment and food? I think you’ve just opened up the possibility that what’s happening to our city is real, not just a figment of our imagination. I see no other reason for the attempt on your life.”
But Tom was no closer to finding out the masterminds of the plot than before learning about the game. Even with his security contacts, he couldn’t come up with any logical culprits.
“You may not have an answer, but think about it,” Daniel intervened. “Allan performed an experiment, with the hypothesis being that a whole population can be manipulated into doing something without them realizing it. Thomas was probably afraid that he’d start thinking that way in real life, or that with some prior knowledge, he’d start noticing things in the city.”
“That’s true, since Lan seemed to have all my memories but those about the game. But how would Thomas know what I was playing?”
“Perhaps he has a way of connecting to the game,” David speculated. “Who knows, maybe all the games we play are monitored and analyzed.”
“The fact that the authorities don’t do anything about the Scrappie compound, and that they don’t care to keep us contained, shows that they are not concerned about an uprising or other dangers. Maybe it’s because they already know everything,” offered Mel.
“You’re right,” Tom added, “while to you it may seem that city security is simply lax, it’s a proven fact that it’s easier to control people that do not feel cornered. We have to leave them a way out. Otherwise, they become dangerous and lash out. We kept the Scrappies under control by ensuring that they have a choice of coming back to resume their existence in the former positions, after the initial rebellious stage was over. Meanwhile, the ones with real mental issues or leadership qualities, the potentially dangerous ones, we took them to the Happy Endings clinic.”
“So what do we do?” Allan felt at a loss.
“I’d like to propose something.” Daniel stopped briefly, deep in thought. “If I could conduct a field test, on a small population of mice, for example, perhaps we could draw some conclusions regarding the food. No offense, Allan, but I’d hate to just jump right to the conclusion that our food is contaminated. Yet based on the symptoms Tom mentioned before, and my observations, it is a definite possibility.”
David was quick to jump on his idea. “In the meantime, I could dig up some background information about entertainment. I remember some friends talking about subtle messaging being layered into advertising during the last century. It seemed farfetched at the time and I didn’t pay much attention. Maybe it could shed some more light on the situation.”
“Very well,” Tom concluded. “Let’s do that, and then we’ll regroup and see what we’re up against.”
They finished their discussion and David went back to the city to get some lab mice for Daniel to start his experiment. Tom went out too, to discuss with Serge the latest developments, and ask if there was anything his old friend could do to help, in addition to what they had already agreed upon.
Allan, Mel, and Daniel were left alone to speculate on everything that had happened.
A few hours later, in the middle of the afternoon, they were sitting outside on the back porch.
Jules and Lan turned the corner at the back of the house. Allan saw them coming and was unsure what to do, torn between anger of seeing his brother disobeying father’s instructions and happiness that Jules was back and seemed all right.
“What are you doing here, man? I thought father told you not to come here except in an emergency,” Allan started.
“I thought you’d
like to know that Brent and Brad are all right. No harm came to them like with you, though it’s hard to say for sure that no one got to them.” Lan sat down on the porch. “And I wanted to make sure that Jules was all right. Don’t worry,” he added, seeing Allan’s stare, “I’ll go back before dark.”
“It’s true. I am a clone,” Jules stated simply, taking a seat on a wicker chair. She told them everything.
“So do you feel any less of a human being, now that you know what you are?” Lan asked her, with no hint of sarcasm.
“It’s weird to know that I’m the result of laboratory work. But then, am I me or just a collection of a poor girl’s memories and a shadow of her soul? I don’t even remember being sick or weak or anything like that, and apparently Julia was always sick. I have a hard time understanding this. Yet, what I am has no bearing on who I am, a human.”
“I think,” Mel ventured shyly at first, “that all human beings, whether originals or clones, have divine origin. I read a lot and it got me thinking that never once were we able to create a living cell from nothing. Manipulate yes, but not create. Even when we take the DNA and replace it with another person’s, we’re just playing God, nothing more. So my theory is that the essence of life, the soul, is something given to us and is unique, ours forever and ever. Our memories, our thoughts, they’re external additions. You understand what I’m trying to say?”
“I think I do and I’d like to believe you,” said Lan. “That way I can be at peace with the fact that it’s still me when I have memories of things I’ve never experienced, some of them quite gross, I might add,” he made a puking face looking at Allan, who smiled.
“Why does it have to be a god who has created life, etcetera, etcetera,” intervened Daniel, his face quite intrigued. “It could just be that we were born, we live and we die, end of story. Life could have come from outer space, other planets, you know, via meteors or comets, or simply through evolution.”
Elysian Fields Page 8
