by J. S. Scott
“Yes, you are, Diana,” he insisted. “You’re exactly what I want. I think you want me, too.”
Nic could see me, and he knew damn well that I wanted him. “I do want you, Nic, but this is crazy. I can’t be your princess.”
I’m not a virgin anymore, and there’s no way to change that.
My breath caught as Nic bent his head and took my mouth with a ferocity I’d never experienced before. His tongue demanded entrance, and I couldn’t deny the passion that was soaring between us. My body was craving his touch, and I had to have more than just his kiss. I needed him.
I kissed him back with all of the desperation that I was experiencing, knowing he could never permanently be mine.
It nearly destroyed me to pull away from him, but as soon as he released my mouth, I did it. “I’d like to go back to the hotel, please. I need to get packed.”
Nic was silent for several heartbeats before he answered tersely, “Very well. I can’t force you to care about me as much as I care about you.”
Tears streamed down my face as I kept my back to him while I walked to the front entrance of his home. My heart was aching so desperately that the pain echoed everywhere in my body.
I did want him. I would accept his proposal of marriage so fast his head would spin if I had only kept my virginity.
I slid into the vehicle, moving over as I realized Nic was riding along.
I turned my head toward the window and quickly wiped at my tears. I was going to have to be strong for Nic’s sake.
I was the wrong woman, a bride who could get him killed if anybody found out I’d slept with Alex. Honestly, I had no idea if my first and only lover was from Rubare Virgina. His native country had never come up, and I just assumed he lived here. He could out me if I ever tried to marry into the royal family, and humiliating a man I’d fallen in love with was the last thing I wanted.
I wanted Nic to be happy and safe.
Another droplet hit my cheek as the landscape flew by the window on the way back to the city, and I couldn’t help but wonder how a simple plan had become so damn painful and complicated.
CHAPTER 7
Diana
“Will you come to the festivities with me tomorrow? The anniversary of Rubare Virgina is a pretty big holiday for us,” Nic said in a raspy voice as we reached the entrance of my hotel room.
I opened the door, then turned to him, trying my best not to cry. My tears had dried, but my heart was an entirely different matter. I had no idea if or when it would even heal. I felt like I could hardly breathe as I looked at Nic, trying to memorize every detail of his handsome face. “I can’t. This has to be goodbye. I’m sorry.” He needed to choose a bride, and I had to leave before it was announced.
He moved lightning fast as he wrapped his powerful arms around my waist and bodily moved me away from the entrance. He stepped inside and closed the door behind him before he cursed, “Fuck goodbye, Diana. I’m not willing to say goodbye to you. I don’t know what’s wrong, but I’ll stay here all damn night until you tell me. I know I’m not the only one feeling like this. You have to feel it, too.” His voice was raspy and demanding.
I couldn’t deny it, and I refused to do so when I looked up into his grim and injured expression. “I’m not the woman you have to marry, Nic. I do feel it, and God knows I wish that I could be the one for you. But I’m not. It’s not you. It’s me. It’s personal.”
“Are you already married?” he asked.
“No. It’s nothing like that.”
“I don’t buy the bullshit, Diana. Something’s wrong. If you feel the same way I do, you’d never walk away from us. From this…”
I moaned into his mouth as his lips slammed down on mine with a fierceness that echoed exactly the way I was feeling.
Hopeless.
Helpless.
Despair.
And…love.
I wrapped my arms around his neck, showing him in actions what I couldn’t say in words. Every emotion had broken loose, every inhibition gone. I had to show Nic exactly how I felt, and I knew I couldn’t say it. But I could have this raw passion, the almost combustible reaction that he set fire to the minute he took me in his arms.
When he finally lifted his head, his mouth closed over the sensitive skin of my neck. “God, Diana. Do you know how much I’ve wanted you? How much I’ve needed to touch you?”
His voice was muffled against my damp skin, and I felt like I was in flames, my entire body responding to his touch. “I’ve wanted you, too,” I said breathlessly, my hands spearing into his hair.
His hands stroked down my back and cupped my ass, pulling me against his hard erection.
My core flooded with moist heat, and I gasped as Nic nipped harder at my skin, then moved his tongue over the area to soothe it.
My hair came loose as Nic’s hands started to roam, and he pulled the clip from the back of my head. “This,” he said in a dark tone as his fingers threaded through my curly locks. “I’ve had wet dreams about seeing this hair spread out on my pillow while I fucked you until you screamed my name.”
I tilted my head back as Nic urged me to yield with his grip on my crazy locks. I could close my eyes and visualize the scene he’d just talked about, and the image made me half crazy to merge our bodies together. “Yes. Please.”
I started to claw at his T-shirt, finally finding my way underneath it to the hot, smooth skin of his back.
After planting a kiss on my neck near the pendant my father had given me, he freed himself to whip the shirt he was wearing over his head, then dropped it on the floor without even looking at it.
When he reached for the hem of my shirt, I lifted my arms, eager to feel Nic’s body skin-to-skin with mine.
I rarely wore a bra, and I wasn’t wearing one today. My breasts were small, but my nipples were hard and sensitive, and the feel of the cotton slipping over the sensitive peaks made me shiver with longing.
He opened his arms and I moved forward, eager to feel the warm skin of his muscular chest beneath my fingers. Nic’s body was perfect, every muscle developed and delineated. My fingers moved to stroke him, outline every muscle that he’d uncovered when he’d removed his shirt.
Nic reached out and cupped my small breasts, tracing the nipples with his thumbs. “You’re so damn perfect, Diana. So beautiful.”
Maybe the moment should have been awkward since I had no experience with sex. Well…not that I could remember anyway. But my body’s reaction was too strong, the impulses too powerful to think about anything else but having Nic surging inside me. My body ached, and I didn’t know how to stop the longing.
“Nic…I don’t know what to do. I hurt,” I said in a breathless gasp.
“I know, sweetheart. I’ll take care of you,” Nic rumbled, his hands moving down to remove my skimpy panties.
I squirmed as he pulled the lacey underwear down my legs, then urged me to step out of them. A moment later, I was standing before Nic completely naked and entirely unafraid of whatever was going to happen.
My body was one big churning mass of need, and I knew only Nic could make it better.
He picked me up and carried me to the bed, then turned back the covers so he could lower me down.
I waited while he shucked the rest of his clothing, my breath catching with every inch he exposed.
“This is what I wanted to see, Diana. The way you look now…that’s what I dream about,” he told me as he kicked his jeans and boxer briefs out of his way, his eyes never leaving mine.
I was on the bed, my crazy hair falling all over the white pillows. “Is it how you imagined?” I asked hesitantly.
He grinned. “Hell, no. It’s so much better. You look like you’re waiting for me, and you look like you’re mine.”
I smiled at him as he lowered his body onto the bed. “I’m not experienced—”<
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“I know, sweetheart. All you have to do right now is feel me.”
I moaned as his hands started to explore my body sensually, his fingers stroking over my nipples and down my stomach. I gripped the sheets as his fingers slid between my thighs, through my folds, and stroked over my clit.
“Yes…” I hissed, the sensation of him touching me where I really needed it was almost too much to handle. “Nic. Please.”
I wanted him, and I couldn’t wait much longer. Just like him, I’d had my own dreams about this incredible man. Sweet, tormenting dreams of someone that would never be mine.
“Be patient, sweetheart.”
“No patience,” I warned him.
“You’re so wet for me, Diana,” he rumbled as his fingers slid sensually over my pussy. He teased and taunted until I felt like I was slowly losing my mind.
“I need you,” I admitted on a strangled whimper.
Nic gently spread my thighs, pushed them up, and then lowered his head before I could figure out what he had planned.
“Oh, sweet Jesus!” I screamed as his hot mouth connected with my core, burying his tongue, lips and nose into my pussy like a hungry man who’d been deprived of what he’d wanted for a very long time.
A streak of white-hot energy arched through my body as Nic’s tongue laved over my core. My hands speared into his hair, and I held him against me, hoping he’d never stop.
My experience was minimal, and the sensations were overwhelming. I panted through the sweet ache, stunned by the pleasure that was flooding over my body. “More,” I pleaded, not caring what I had to do to reach the pinnacle I was craving.
He gave me more, his tongue stroking harder over the tiny bundle of nerves that were quivering and swollen, my entire body begging for release.
I fisted his hair as my climax hit me like a falling boulder.
Swift.
Fast.
Heavy.
Hard.
And completely out of control.
The waves of release rolled over me so forcefully that it was almost terrifying. I finally just let go, trusting that Nic would catch me like he always did.
“Oh, God,” I moaned as Nic lapped up the nectar that had been released when I came, stretching out the sweet orgasm for as long as possible.
I was a breathless, panting, sweaty mess by the time Nic slid up my body. “Are you okay, love?” he asked with concern in his voice as he supported his weight on his arms and looked me in the eyes.
I wrapped my arms around him and held him close to me. “Yeah. I’m okay. Just a little stunned. I didn’t know it could be like that.”
He pressed sensual little pecks on my neck, and then he kissed me. I savored the taste of myself on his lips, feeling unusually possessive as I kept my arms wrapped firmly around his neck.
I didn’t want to leave him.
I didn’t want to let go.
And I sure as hell didn’t want him touching any woman but me.
When he broke away, he said in a graveled voice, “I want to bury myself inside you so bad it hurts, Diana. But I don’t want to hurt you. I’m a big man.”
“You won’t hurt me,” I assured him. It wasn’t like I was a virgin.
“I might,” he answered as his hips surged forward, his cock entering me with one forceful thrust.
The momentary pain surprised me, but he’d warned me that he was a big guy. He hadn’t been lying. It had been painful, but the sensation of him filling a part of me that longed for him was so damn good that it overrode the initial discomfort.
“Tell me you’re okay,” Nic demanded, his body completely still while he remained seated deep inside me.
I could feel his powerful body shudder, but he still didn’t move.
I took several deep breaths, then wrapped my legs around his hips. The pain was gone, but the ache for Nic was intense. “I’m fine. All I want is for you to make love to me.”
“I plan on it, sweetheart,” he answered in a strained voice. “I’m not sure I can wait much longer.”
“Don’t wait,” I pleaded. “I need you.”
“God, Diana! I need you, too.”
“Then fuck me, Nic. Do it now.”
Like something inside him had snapped, Nic drew back, and then buried himself again…and again.
I tried to catch his furious rhythm, surging to meet him every time he thrust upward, but I got lost in the insanity, the pleasure of having him fill me over and over, and his fierce possessiveness as he repeated one word again and again...
“Mine!” Nic repeated it several times as he claimed my body in a way I’d never been taken.
I tried to hold him, my fingernails digging into his back as I felt the onslaught of release rushing toward me.
“So good. Too good,” I moaned, my body writhing beneath him.
I climaxed, my sheath clamping down on his cock as my body rocketed into space. I clung to Nic like he was my lifeline, my nails digging into his skin as my orgasm pounded over me.
“Diana,” Nic groaned, my channel milking him of his hot release.
We were both a hot mess of sweaty, tangled limbs as we tried to catch our breath.
Nic eased off me, then flipped onto his back and pulled me over him like a blanket. He buried his face in my hair, and his hand stroked lovingly over my back as we slowly recovered.
I knew I was wrecked, destroyed. I should have never let this happen, but I hadn’t known I’d feel such a ferocious possessiveness once Nic had claimed me.
I had no idea what my first time had been like, but the man who was so tenderly caressing my body, holding me like he never wanted to let me go, had completely captured both my body and my heart.
CHAPTER 8
Diana
“I’m sorry to bother you on such an important day, but can you possibly get me out of Rubare Virgina today?” I asked Princess Jessica as soon as she arrived at the door of my hotel.
I had no doubt she was answering an urgent summons that I’d requested through Theo. It was the anniversary of Rubare Virgina becoming a nation, and I was pretty sure I’d probably called her away from the important celebration. But I was desperate to get home, and I needed a royal ally to help me get there.
Jessica smiled at me as she stepped into my hotel room and closed the door. “Why so urgent?” she asked in a concerned voice. “Did something happen at home?”
“Yes…no…well, I really don’t know. This is personal,” I answered uncertainly.
How was I supposed to explain to her that I just couldn’t see Nic again? We’d both fallen asleep not long after the eye-opening sexual interlude we’d shared, and he’d had to leave early this morning to attend to his duties for the anniversary. I hadn’t been very wide awake when he’d asked me If I’d come to the festivities later, so I’d been noncommittal.
But even earlier in the morning, I’d known that I couldn’t see him again. I had no control when I was with him.
The pretty brunette princess—dressed in a formal gown that put my jeans and tank top to shame—took a moment before she spoke. “Is it Nic?” she asked hesitantly. “I know you’ve been going out with him.”
I nodded, tears springing to my eyes as I thought about last night and how much he meant to me. “I can’t see him again. I might give in and agree to marry him.”
“And that would be a bad thing?” Jessica questioned. “You don’t care about him?”
“I do. I love him. That’s why I need to go. He’s everything I could ever want, and more than I ever thought I’d find. I want to marry him, but I can’t.”
Princess Jessica look at me with a confused expression. “Why? I know he cares for you. His father thinks he’s ready to make his announcement.”
I shook my head. “He can’t. I’m not a virgin anymore.”
A secret smile lit on Jessica’s face. “I don’t think he’s going to care. I can tell you with certainty that you can become a princess even if you aren’t a virgin.”
“Maybe if nobody knew,” I agreed. “Maybe if I’d lost my virginity in the United States. But I gave it away here, Princess Jessica. The day I arrived on the night of the ball. Alex, the gentleman who introduced me to you that night at the ball was the man I chose to sleep with to get rid of my virginity. I don’t know for sure, but I’m fairly certain that he’s a Rubarean. He could out me at any time, and that would be humiliating for Nic.”
“Is there any possibility that you could be pregnant?” she asked in a hushed voice.
Oh, God. I’d never even considered that possibility since I had planned on insisting the taker of my virginity used protection, and I wasn’t in the fertile part of my cycle. “I’m not sure Princess Jessica. I hope not.”
Jessica sighed as she took a seat on my bed. “Please just call me Jessica. I’m still not used to titles. And yes, that could end up being a problem. But there must be some way to fix this.”
“The only way to fix it is for me to leave and for Nic to pick another bride. I was scheduled to fly out in the morning. But if I stay, I’m afraid Nic will find me since I didn’t attend the celebration today.” My heart skipped a beat at the thought of seeing Nic again.
“He will,” Jessica agreed. “The Demande men are relentless once they decide they want something. If he wants to marry you, he’ll pursue you to the ends of the Earth.”
“He does want to marry me. He asked me. But no matter how much I want to be with him, I can’t make him a laughing stock in his own country. He’d never be the same man. And then there’s the Arcano. What if they punish him for marrying a woman who wasn’t a virgin, and who slept with another Rubarean? And what if there’s any chance I could be pregnant? It wasn’t in a fertile time of my cycle, but I can’t remember whether or not he used a damn condom.” I was so frustrated with my own stupid actions that I wanted to cry.
