In the span of a couple of days, Fatos had managed to take away the only real friend Valon had made. He had ruined her in a way that no matter if she looked in the mirror, or if she even looked at Valon, she would always think of Fatos.
But as Valon lay awake over the course of the night, consumed by guilt, he refused to let this be the end for her.
She had asked him to kill her, to end the pain that she was going to live with if she remained here…he would give her something better.
“We have to go.”
“Valon…what are you talking about?”
Her eyes were closing again, probably from the drugs he had given her last night, but if he was going to get her out of this place, they needed to go. Now.
“Elena!”
But she was too groggy to do anything more than nod her head.
Sliding out of the bed, Valon slipped an arm beneath her legs and another around her shoulders, lifting her as best he could. She groaned with the moving, blinking her eyes open as she squinted at him.
“What are you doing, Valon?”
“Do you want to leave this place?”
That seemed to finally get through to her. “Are we leaving?”
No, Valon probably could never leave this place. “Yes,” he lied because he didn’t think she would go if he said only her. “Can you walk? Do you need my help?”
He set her down as he asked, checking her bandages as he did so.
“I’m fine. Let’s just go. Where’s Loki? Are we bringing him?”
He almost smiled. She cared as much about him as she did their own safety, but Valon needed Loki to stay there and guard the door. It would buy them more time.
Luckily for them, there wasn’t much for them to take since she usually wore his clothes, and it wasn’t like he was leaving anyway.
Outside his bedroom door, he crouched down so that he was eye level with Loki, making sure he got his command across. “No one goes in, understand.”
He didn’t have to tell him twice. Loki made a little circle then sat in front of the door.
Grabbing hold of Elena’s hand, he led her through the hallways, out through the back where the least amount of guards were stationed. Valon had learned the layout of this place, and the woods that made up the backyard were second nature to him. As they crossed through, however, he did make a stop beneath a giant oak tree, digging his hands into the dirt until he uncovered the little sack he had buried so many years ago. He didn’t have time to go through it; he just stuffed it in his pocket and kept going.
From his old apartment, the train station was about a thirty-minute walk, but adding in the distance from Bastian’s compound, it was much further.
Valon didn’t complain, and when it grew to be too much for Elena, he carried her on his back until they reached the station. Because of the sheer amount of times he had won in the Pit, Bastian had begun to give him small stipends. Since he lived in the compound, there was very little that he bought himself.
At the counter, Valon looked the frightened old woman in the face. “Ticket to anywhere, and I’ll give you two hundred euros if you make no record of it.”
He might have looked dangerous, but most people cared more about money than looks.
When the ticket and boarding pass was printed, Valon walked with Elena over to a vending machine, getting her a soda and a bag of chips, and then he handed over the jacket from when he was thirteen that no longer fit him, but probably would fit her. When she had it on and zipped, he pressed all the money he had to his name into her hand.
She looked from it to him, and he saw the very moment when she realized that he wouldn’t be coming with her. “Valon, they’ll kill you.”
“Maybe.”
“Why won’t you come with me?” she asked, tears welling in her eyes. “We can start over somewhere.”
“They’ll look for me first, and that’ll give you more time to get away from here. Otherwise we both die and what good would that do us?” He pushed a strand of hair out of her face. It didn’t matter what Fatos had done to her, she was still beautiful to him. “Be free for the both of us.”
A train horn blared in the distance, growing ever closer.
When she still looked reluctant to walk away from him, he said, “When this is all over and every single one of them is dead, I’ll find you.”
He drew her into his arms, kissing the top of her head as the train came slowly into the station, the doors opening as others stepped off and more stepped on. It was time for her to go.
“I love you, Valon.”
He smiled brokenly, accepting her words, even when he knew she didn’t mean them. It was his fault she had gotten hurt. And it was his fault that her face would never look the same again.
No, she couldn’t love somebody like him.
No one could.
Letting her go, he took a step back, urging her with his eyes to get on the train. After a brief hesitation, she did exactly that, handing over her pass to one of the people inside. He didn’t know how far she would get, but he hoped for her sake that she at least made it out of the country.
As the train whistled again, announcing its departure, he held her gaze and mouthed the words, ‘I love you, too.’ She had been a true friend to him, and now that he knew what that was like, he would cherish this memory.
He remained there long after he had lost sight of her, thinking of what he’d given up but also of what he had gained. There was no question that what he did was the right thing to do, but the guilt still ate at him for how long he had allowed her to suffer—even if he had been blind to it—and ultimately, the price she’d had to pay for his selfishness.
____
Valon tucked his hands into his pockets, his head held high as he headed back to the place he’d called home for the last five years. He’d turned a blind eye to the life he’d led in that place, becoming the very thing they had wanted, but now…who was he now?
He wasn’t a mindless killer like they wanted…
He wasn’t the man Elena had wanted him to be…
Maybe one day he would find out. Maybe one day he would be better than he was.
Valon saw the car coming toward him but didn’t bother to move out of the way, a part of him hoping that he would get hit and end it all. He had been wandering for hours, so the likelihood of them knowing which train Elena was on was slim, not to mention they couldn’t have known what time they’d left.
Stopping, Valon waited, a smile spreading on his lips when Strom climbed out of the backseat and pointed a gun at him. That little grin made him unsure, but he merely tightened his hold, more assured when Fatos got out next.
Unlike Strom who looked angry, Fatos looked…disappointed.
“Bastian is waiting for you.”
Valon shrugged and started walking toward the car, ignoring their looks of surprise. Did they think he would run? He didn’t care much about anything anymore, not even his life.
The ride back was uneventful and unbearably quiet, but Valon just rested his head against the glass window and thought about where he would have been if he’d gone anywhere but to Bastian.
There were more waiting when they arrived back, most staring at him as though they couldn’t understand his actions. No, they wouldn’t.
Valon didn’t need the escorts because he wasn’t afraid to face Bastian’s wrath. He was waiting inside the barn, his face flushed red with anger.
“Where’s Loki?”
“Oh, shut—”
When Strom moved to grab him, Valon struck first, dropping him with one hit. They could do this one of two ways. Either he got the answer he wanted and he accepted whatever punishment Bastian decided on, or he would break every single person in the room and not think twice about it.
“He’s still locked in your room. No one has touched him.”
His answer given, Bastian nodded for the others to tie him up, and this time, Valon didn’t fight back.
“Women,” Bastian said conver
sationally as he ignored the men zip-tying Valon’s wrists, hefting him up onto one of the hooks dangling from the ceiling. “They can destroy the best of partnerships. No, the best relationships. Have I not been good to you, Valon? Have I not given you everything you have asked for and more? Where is your loyalty, boy? I hand you the world, and you spit in my face.”
Valon, all the while Bastian was speaking, stared at the ground, not in fear, but because he didn’t feel the heaviness he normally did. When he finished a round in the Pit, there was always that sinking feeling in his gut that kept him awake at night. But this…this act of defiance had taken some of that away.
Finally, after condemning so many to misery or death in this place, he had managed to help one person get away. She was smart, smarter than anyone here had given her credit for, so he didn’t doubt for a second that she would run for as long as it took.
Just the image in his head of her staring back at him through the small window of the train brought a small smile to his face.
Whatever punishment Bastian wanted meted out, he would gladly accept it.
“Fatos.”
Valon’s body tensed as he heard his friend’s footsteps, and then looked up into his face as he came around to his line of vision.
“You did this to yourself,” Fatos said with a frown. And the part that baffled Valon the most was that he actually looked like he regretted what he was about to do…but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t enjoy it.
His shirt was cut away, landing in a pile on the dirt floor.
It was worth it…
That was what Valon had to remind himself of as he heard Fatos pick up a blade, even as that same blade scored down his back, ripping his flesh open.
He tried…he tried desperately not to vocalize the pain he was in, but with each cut, the pain multiplied and before he knew, he was screaming…but he didn’t beg.
Valon was done begging anyone for anything.
-
14
______
Three years later…
Valon trailed along behind Fatos and Bastian as they were led through the mansion where the infamous Besnik family lived. It was grand, bigger than any home Valon had ever seen, but while Fatos looked around in open envy, Valon was unfazed. He didn’t think anything could impress him anymore.
Now that he was known beyond their small circle for what he was capable of—notably for how he lacked emotion while doing it—apparently, he was being offered a job that only someone like him could pull off.
But Valon didn’t believe that for a second. There were plenty of fucking idiots who wanted to do this, kill just because, especially if they were getting paid to do it. But since Bastian wanted him to do it, he had no choice.
“Stay here.”
Valon remained outside the door as Bastian and Fatos disappeared behind it, their voices muffled behind the heavy door. Unlike Bastian’s place of residence, the Besnik family had armed guards everywhere, and none of them looked like they had ever smiled a day in their life.
He couldn’t have been standing outside of the room for more than a couple of minutes before he heard, “Bring him in.”
Remaining silent, he trailed behind the two who were leading him in, digging his hands into his pockets to fight the urge to fidget. He wasn’t nervous, but something about this group of men made him wary.
Bastian’s men were like open books. Give them alcohol and semi-conscious women and they were satisfied. This lot seemed far less obvious.
All eyes were on him as he entered the room. Bastian and Fatos were seated at a table with two other men. It was clear which one was the boss, the other just seemed far too young.
“Valon, yes?” the boss asked with an easy smile, gesturing for him to take the lone seat available at the table. “I’ve heard great things about you. I am Jetmir Besnik.”
That he could kill with his bare hands…and when he was really inspired, he could drag out that death for hours. This trait wasn’t something he thought was great.
Not responding, Valon just waited for him to go on.
“I have a little problem, you see. I have been asked to do something for a couple of friends of mine, the Volkov brothers. Perhaps you have heard of them? And while I would not mind doing it, I need someone with your particular skills.”
Apparently, someone needed to die if he was coming to Valon about it. He had to admit, he was a little intrigued. And he had, actually, heard of the Volkovs, though he didn’t know much about them or their operation. Mikhail and Viktor, he thought their names were.
“Who?”
“A man by the name of Mishca Volkov. He has information that I need to expand my business over in the United States, but he has been unwilling to share this information with my associate, so my associate has come to me to fix it. You can see my problem, yes?”
Valon shrugged. No, he really didn’t.
Jetmir reached into his inside coat pocket, pulling free a photograph and sliding it across the table to Valon. When he picked it up, he studied the black and white image and the man featured in it.
There was not much he could tell from the photo, only that the boy had dark hair and dressed well, and he was a year or two younger than Valon.
Dropping the picture, Valon looked at Jetmir, meeting his gaze. “Why do you need me for this? You have capable men here?” This was an assumption on Valon’s part. Just because a man carried a gun didn’t mean he knew how to use it. Strom was the perfect example.
“This boy you see, he is a captain in the Volkov Bratva. You may or may not have heard of them but know that they are deadly, and if one were to go after them, they need to send the best. You are the best at what you do.” His smile was a contradiction to his words. “And you do not know fear.”
That wasn’t right, actually. Valon did know fear. He had felt it many times in his life. It was that he didn’t show weakness in the face of those fears. That was what made him different from each man seated at that table.
“How much?”
Bastian frowned at him, but Valon ignored him. Otherwise, the fat man would help himself to whatever it was Jetmir intended to give him in return for completing this job for him.
“Thirty-thousand U.S. dollars.”
Nodding once, Valon asked, “When do we start?”
____
Having never flown on a plane, or even left the countryside that he’d grown up in for the last twenty-three years, Valon felt out of sorts. Luckily, he had Loki with him, though he had been regulated to a crate during the ride. He had requested that stipulation for this assignment. Bastian had been annoyed by this fact, but Jetmir had readily agreed. With what Valon was doing for him, he hadn’t cared if he brought all the fucking dogs in Albania.
Landing in a place that he had only ever read about, it seemed far busier than he expected. And louder. Everything just seemed almost too bright for someone who was used to the silence of everyday life. But he didn’t mind it. He actually liked it, and if he were here for any other reason than to kill someone, he might have enjoyed it more.
From the plane, they took multiple cars to a brownstone building in Brooklyn—or at least that was what Strom said—and climbed out. Valon opened the gate for Loki to jump out, laughing when he stretched in the way only dogs did, stopping abruptly when Fatos clapped a hand on his shoulder.
Either he didn’t notice the glare or he just ignored it as Fatos said, “We need to go over strategy.”
Shrugging off his touch, he headed into the building, Loki trotting at his heels.
“I’ll drive,” Strom offered as they began discussing what the night would entail. “You two wait in back and surprise.”
Considering Valon had learned how to speak better English in a few years than Strom did after more than thirty, he really needed to do better, but that might have just been because Valon had wanted more for himself after Elena had gone.
It hadn’t taken long before everything was forgiven and things had gone b
ack to normal. When police didn’t show up for those first six months, they’d figured that she was smart enough to just disappear.
In three years, Valon had learned how to drive—though he wouldn’t say he was particularly great at it—and read any book that he could get his hands on. He could be a slave, but at least he would be a smart one.
“He won’t know what hit him!” Fatos exclaimed on a laugh, again looking at Valon as though he would find some kind of camaraderie. There was none.
“Let’s get this shit over with.”
____
Quiet and observing, Valon leaned back against the wall of the van, his ski mask shoved up to bunch at his hairline. The others had been excited about what was going to happen tonight. They were too eager, which meant that they would be prone to making mistakes.
Valon didn’t feel such things.
He didn’t relish in the pain he was going to inflict by the night’s end. He was resigned to it. He definitely felt for the poor bastard who was going to get taken tonight.
They were heading out of Brooklyn, toward the location where the Russian was supposed to be for the night, but before they had gotten far, Strom suddenly exclaimed from the front seat, “There he is!”
Since there were no windows in the back of the van, Valon didn’t know whether this was true or if Strom was just an idiot. If he had to wager, he’d bet on the second.
“Are you sure?” Fatos asked, already reaching to tug down his mask.
“It is, but there is the girl with him.”
Shit. There wasn’t supposed to be any witnesses. If—
“We’ll bring her, too,” Fatos said. “Circle the block so he doesn’t get suspicious.”
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Valon asked as Strom follow his instruction. “The girl wasn’t part of the plan.”
“If you get squeamish, then I’ll take care of it.”
Valon: What Once Was (Volkov Bratva Book 0) Page 9
