by Tanith Frost
But evening has fallen now. All we have left to do is wait.
I study him more closely as he drinks his coffee. He looks tired and drained. It has to be taking all of his resolve to keep himself from jumping into the Pathfinder and heading back to town to feed.
As for me, I almost wish I felt worse. I feel drained, too, and I’m craving blood as a proper vampire should be. But I’m not as weak and tired after this morning’s strain as I would once have been. I wish there was someone I could talk to about this strange power in me, even just to ask whether it will go away.
I’ve managed to ignore my difference since we arrived here, since I became sure no one senses it in me. I’m feeling it this morning, though, as my body seems to draw on it whether I want it to or not—and I am fighting it, hunger be damned. And yet I’d embrace this advantage if my power didn’t feel so off balance as it resists this foreign strength. I can’t stand this tension in myself.
This falls firmly in the category of Shit I Don’t Need Right Now, especially with the elders coming.
I picture Silas’s fire being walled up behind dark stone constructed of my own power. My hands tremble as the artificial strength leaves me, but I instantly feel more at peace.
“Aviva?”
“Hmm?”
Daniel looks concerned. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. Just thinking. What do you think the elders will do about this?”
He sips his coffee again and shrugs. “I try not to think too hard about it. They’ll do what they’ll do, and we’ll do as we’re told.”
I frown at him. “Nothing has changed for you, then?”
He moves to the window and looks out. The sun set more than an hour ago. They’ll be here soon. “The elders make mistakes. I acknowledge that. They acknowledge it, too, or at least some do. They’re not perfect, but they are vastly more experienced than I am, and whatever my feelings about them as individuals, they all have their parts to play within Maelstrom.” He turns back to me. “And if I ever want to be in a position where I’m the one making decisions, I have to do the best I can to serve their interests now.”
I press my lips together, afraid of what I might say if I speak. Daniel’s never indicated that he has aspirations higher than hunting rogue vampires and helping out with other threats, but there it is. Should he survive long enough and not fuck things up too badly for himself, he’ll hold power someday.
I have no such aspirations. But whatever happens, I’m not going to end up in a place like this. I’m going to keep fighting. Much as I’m beginning to understand the elderly vampires who are caged in this house—Hannabelle’s hatred of the darkness in her, Trent’s frustration with our species choosing safety over freedom, even Genevieve’s need to stir the pot for a bit of excitement once in a while—I can’t let myself become like them.
I’m going to pass Miranda’s fucking tests, balance the scales, fit in, and find a place for myself. Even if it kills me.
Again.
I pour another mug of coffee and carry it to the downstairs sitting room, where everyone has once again gathered. I hand the mug to Naya. No one speaks. Not even Daniel when he joins us. It’s like we’re waiting to be sentenced for someone else’s crime.
Everyone has made themselves presentable for the evening. Trent is in his customary suit, while Edwin sports an unsuitably fancy black tuxedo that makes him look more like a magician than anything else. Lucille and Hannabelle look quite presentable in their usual dresses, and I suspect that Genevieve stepped in to tame Lucille’s hair into the tasteful braid twisted at the back of her neck. The old glamourpuss herself is wearing slacks for the first time since I’ve met her, coupled with a black sweater set and a string of pearls.
I feel underdressed in my ripped jeans, t-shirt, and leather boots, but it’s not like I’ve had time to go shopping.
The distant rumble of an engine makes every vampire in the room turn his or her head toward the front of the house, followed a few seconds later by the humans.
“I’ll um… I’ll make sure everything is set in the dining room,” Sean stammers, and bolts from the room.
I can’t help smiling after him. Even with his awareness of our existence and our culture, he’s still not going to have an easy time fitting in after his eventual change. Like the dorky new kid in class, but one I suspect will carve out a place for himself.
Doors slam outside, and Daniel looks to me.
Right. This is my show now, for as long as I can maintain control. Daniel doesn’t work here. Everyone else is a mere human or considered irrelevant by the elders.
I set my jaw and move quickly toward the door, arriving just in time to answer after the first knock.
Three vampires in black suits and sunglasses stand shoulder to shoulder, blocking my view of whoever’s behind them. Without a word they push past me, looking around the entryway, scanning for threats.
I want to tell them that the only threat to their current position would be falling vampires and that Edwin is safely stowed away with the others, but they wouldn’t get it.
And they’re just doing their job.
“Good evening, Aviva.” Viktor offers me a wide, oily grin that sets my skin crawling. “Who’d have thought we’d meet again so soon?”
“It certainly wasn’t on my to-do list,” I offer back, with the most pleasant smile I can muster. “But we’re glad you could come on such short notice.”
His smile fades. “This is most serious, of course. We’re pleased you were able to contain the threat so quickly and effectively.”
He steps aside, and Miranda enters, followed by another vampire I’ve never met. Another elder, in fact, and the raw power the three carry between them is almost nauseatingly overwhelming.
“Aviva,” Miranda murmurs, and glides down the hallway to greet Daniel, who’s waiting to direct them into the dining room. She’s wearing a white dress, as she has been every time I’ve seen her, though tonight her long, dark hair flows loose over her shoulders. Her power surrounds her as Viktor’s does, but there’s a different quality to hers. It’s every bit as intimidating and terrifying as his, but there’s something more certain about Miranda’s. Its strength is unquestionable, its depth unimaginable.
The other elder, a male only a little taller than I am with broad shoulders and pallid golden skin, offers me a smile that does nothing to offset the chill in his black-brown eyes. He adjusts the knot of his crimson tie and takes in the shabby decor of the hallway with obvious distaste.
It’s not my home, and has only recently become my responsibility, but a wave of hot shame washes over me. This is no place for a vampire who has any kind of pride or power, and it’s clear that the assignment reflects badly on me.
He doesn’t bother to introduce himself before he heads for the dining room, followed by five more burly vampires and the human I assume did the early-evening driving. Two of the vampires carry guns, which they take upstairs without waiting for permission to invade our space.
I look out the door before closing it, noting the two vans with tinted windows parked not far from Daniel’s vehicle. I close my eyes and open my awareness, but feel no one else. No more great elder powers, thank goodness.
Though there’s someone behind me.
I turn and let two of the bodyguard types move past me to take up positions on the porch.
“There’s a back door,” I tell them.
“We’ve got it under control,” the guy on the left tells me.
I wonder whether his face would crack if he smiled.
I hesitate just one more moment, letting the evening air cleanse what passes for my spirit, and head back into the house.
It’s just vampires in the dining room. Three elders, two bodyguards, one Daniel. No partridge, no pear tree. Just me, standing awkwardly in the doorway.
Miranda takes the seat at the head of the table, and the other elders take the chairs on either side of her. This calms me for some reason. Miranda has made it cle
ar what she thinks of me—that I’m a disappointment, possibly a danger, that I’m being punished—but at least she’s honest about that. I have no idea where I stand with the others, but the fact remains that Miranda is in charge here.
I didn’t realize until now that even though I don’t like her, I almost trust her. And I’m kind of glad she’s here, after all.
I’ll have to watch that. Better than Viktor is a pretty damn low bar for me to fall into the trap of trusting someone.
Daniel sits next to the unfamiliar elder, which leaves me with the open seat next to Viktor. The guards take up positions beside the door and the window and stand at ease, like secret service agents so well trained they’ve become statues, without even a pulse to throw off their concentration.
“Raymond, I don’t believe you’ve met Aviva,” Miranda says.
“Just now,” the elder responds. He doesn’t sound impressed. I don’t care. At least I have a name for him now.
“Very good.” Miranda leans back in her chair and rests her pale, graceful hands on the dark wood of the table in front of her. I don’t want to stare, but I look her over in quick glances. She looks much as she did the last time I saw her. Beautiful in an unearthly way, calm on the surface, but strained about her midnight blue eyes. Unadorned save for the graceful cut of her dress.
Raymond taps a heavy gold ring against the table. “There’s no doubt about the human’s intentions?”
“None,” I say, and tell them exactly what happened when I entered the attic to check on Hannabelle and Naya. As with my story to Miranda over the phone, I leave out what I was doing before—what almost distracted me.
“I called Miranda while Daniel took over questioning,” I finish, and look to him.
He flexes his fingers like he’s about to pop his knuckles, then seems to think better of exercising his old habit. “She claims she was working alone,” he says.
Viktor narrows his eyes. “Do you believe her?”
“Not for a moment. She seems foolish, even uninformed in some ways, but she had the skills to find this place, and I have no doubt she would have finished Hannabelle off had Aviva not stopped her. Someone has been teaching and training her, if not perfectly.”
“Perhaps you could have twisted her arm a little harder,” Raymond suggests.
Daniel shrugs. “I dislocated both of them. I’m not sure how much harder I could have twisted.”
I mentally congratulate myself for not letting my face show the cold horror that flashes through me at his admission. No wonder he didn’t give me details.
“Foolish in what way?” Viktor asks.
I pull the crucifix from my pocket and set it on the table. The little figure’s head falls back, as though a botched beheading has been added to the list of indignities committed by his abusers.
Miranda’s lips tighten, but her eyes give away her amusement. “Well, then.”
“But she had stakes,” I add.
“And I found a bag in the attic with a small axe and several large knives,” Daniel says.
I nod, though this is news to me. I’d probably know about this if I’d had the guts to ask about what happened up there. “So I suppose she planned to hide out until daylight, take out whatever human was on duty, and go about her business when we all should have been sleeping.”
A foolish plan, of course. It’s a terrible time to be up, but there’s no law saying vampires have to sleep during the day. Still, it’s my best guess.
The elders exchange looks with each other.
“A test?” Raymond offers, and Miranda nods.
“Quite possibly.”
“So we should expect more?” I ask, and the three exchange that look again. “Will you leave help?”
“Our personal guards will not remain here,” Viktor says. “They’re needed elsewhere. Everyone is.”
I try not to hear an except you at the end of that last comment. I’m going to become paranoid about my status if I’m not careful. And even if he is baiting me, I’m not going to bite.
Miranda’s lips tighten, but there’s no dissent from our high elder.
“I’ll do my best to protect them,” I say, “but it will be difficult doing it alone. I’m going to need help.” No one answers. As the silence stretches on, my irritation grows. “You can’t leave the old ones out here to be taken down by vampire hunters,” I continue, unable to hide the emotion in my voice. “This one was an idiot, and I was lucky. What if the next ones who come aren’t so inept?” I drop my voice in case any of the others are listening in. “I get it. You probably see this place and everyone in it as a burden. But they’re worth saving. Every one of them. They have knowledge and experience, and—”
“As do we all,” Viktor cuts in, “but we’re not a drain on resources that could be supporting the active, involved, productive members of our clan. Protecting this home is a waste of vampires who would unquestionably be more useful elsewhere.” He leans toward me, and for a moment I’m afraid he’s going to touch my hand in a gesture that would be a mockery of kindness. But he doesn’t. Instead, he gives me a leering grin that exposes his fangs. “I must admit though, it is nice to see that your empathy now extends toward your own species.”
The horrified chill that washes over me brings goosebumps up on my skin.
I look to Daniel, but he’s focused his attention on Viktor. “Aviva is a loyal member of Maelstrom,” he says. “I’ve never doubted it. Not during her training, not after. We might have avoided quite the mess at the sanctuary if we’d listened to her sooner.”
A lump forms in my throat. Judging by the hard looks Daniel is getting from Raymond and Viktor, even this small defence is going too far.
I wonder whether he’d be so quick to draw their attention away from me if he knew the whole truth about my sins.
One of the bodyguards appears at the door and nods to the elders.
“Supper’s here,” Miranda says quietly, and the guard standing behind her moves to the door. She smiles gently, as though the tension around the table doesn’t trouble her at all. “I persuaded some of the better stock to make the trip out for the weekend. All trustworthy, of course. Experienced, but still fine quality.”
The look on Viktor's face clearly indicates that this is yet another waste of resources, but I’m grateful. I wasn’t looking forward to seeing what kind of fare we’d get out here. I expected the dregs, desperate enough to be fed on that they’d allow their asses to be hauled out here, foregoing the convenience and ambience of the club for a guaranteed bite.
My mouth waters. I need blood badly enough that my hunger washes all other concerns away.
“You may go,” Miranda says, but neither Daniel nor I move. Her eyes narrow threateningly, like we’re treacherously close to fraying her patience. “We’ll need some time to discuss matters amongst ourselves.”
Daniel nods and rises, and shoots me a significant look that tells me to do the same. My time for arguing my case is over. I doubt they’d become any more inclined to listen to me even if I spoke for another hour, but I still have to fight to keep my mouth shut as I follow him out the door.
“They’ll do what they’ll do, and we’ll do as we’re told,” I say once we’re out of earshot, though my tone is significantly less respectful than Daniel’s was when he spoke the same words earlier.
“Give them a chance,” he tells me, but to his credit, he doesn’t sound at all confident. He leans in and bumps me with his arm as we head down the hallway toward the sitting room, where a few tentative human voices now mix with the vampires’. “Whatever happens, I’m not going anywhere this time. I promise. We can handle this together.”
Guilt pools in my stomach even as my heart lifts at the promise. He won’t leave me again. He wants to stay with me.
I should tell him everything.
I will.
But not tonight. I’m not ready to lose him again.
At least it’s over.
Not a thought I’ve ever had abou
t feeding—at least, not since my earliest days of denial, and I don’t like to think about those anymore. But there it is. At least it’s over.
I don’t know how I thought it would go. Maybe I assumed the elderly vampires would be allowed to take their stock up to their rooms, or at least find some privacy somewhere. Instead, they all fed in the sitting room. Well, all save for Edwin, who had to be restrained in the kitchen and bound tight to a chair while a scarred and grizzled human who looked up for a challenge allowed him to feed.
Apparently charming quirkiness and temporal confusion aren’t Edwin’s only failings.
Daniel and I did a little better. He claimed a couple of vials of pretty yellow liquid from a gunmetal grey briefcase and ordered a pair of young women to wait for us. They didn’t object to the order, and seemed relieved when we led them away after everyone else was finished. By then I was past ready for my meal, stressed out by the awkwardness of everyone else’s semi-public feedings and the subtle judgemental looks the stock’s escort vampires gave the elderly as they fed.
This could be you some day, I wanted to tell them, but they’d have laughed in my face.
I’m sure Genevieve never saw it coming. Or Trent. Or any of them.
In any case, we’re done, and the stock have gone off to wherever Miranda is putting them up for the weekend. And though my meal in the office was more awkward than I’d have liked, at least I’m physically satisfied.
I’ve discovered that nothing caps off a feeding like a hit of starlight, and since no one has called me and Daniel back to the dining room, I head for the back door to step outside for a few minutes.
The old vampires have all dispersed, I assume either to their bedrooms to relax or to the upstairs sitting room to talk. Though they didn’t say anything to me about it, I’m sure it didn’t escape any of their notices that no elder came to pay their respects before our meeting. I’m also sure they all have thoughts on it.
I’m relieved to find the back porch unoccupied when I step out, though I quickly spot the pair of bodyguards making a circuit of the house, cutting through the grassy field that separates the house from the ocean. I raise a hand in greeting, but neither responds, though I know they saw me.
