by Tricia Goyer
Never a piece of vegetable so small but that it can go into the salad or be made into a garnish or added to the soup. No bit of fruit, but it can be made to brighten an aspic, garnish a chop plate, top a meringue or decorate a cake.*
* Ruth Berolzheimer, 250 Ways to Serve Fresh Vegetables (Culinary Arts Institute, 1940), 2.
Chapter Twenty-Four
The best things in life are not things.
AMISH PROVERB
Hope put on her blue dress and walked to Ruth Ann’s house with a lightness to her steps. Jonas must have been watching for her because he opened the door even before she knocked.
“Ruth Ann and Emma insist that you and I have dinner with everyone at the big table, but I have something special set up in the backyard for after. I hope you don’t mind.”
“Of course I don’t mind.” She stepped inside and breathed in deeply. “I’m looking forward to spending time with your family.”
Within minutes Ruth Ann had filled the table with all the fixings for a haystack supper. She watched as Jonas piled up the rice, cauliflower, ground beef, and so much more. He wasn’t shy about eating. Hope tucked away that knowledge for future use. Ruth Ann seemed especially pleased with Hope’s presence. Every one of Hope’s comments was met with a nod of approval and a smile. There was no room to doubt what Jonas’s sister thought of their growing relationship.
Ruth Ann’s daughter Hannah joined them halfway through. She still had two months to go before the birth of her twins, and she looked larger than almost any pregnant woman Hope had seen. She looked uncomfortable and picked at everything on her plate. Though she tried to be cheerful, Hope had compassion for the woman who was just her age. And just to think, the pregnancy was just the beginning. Soon she’d have two infants to care for, with a husband who often left town for construction jobs.
Maybe Ruth Ann will be so busy still helping her daughter there will be need for Jonas to return to Pinecraft in the fall. But the thought was futile. Where would she be in the fall? That had yet to be determined.
“Oh Hope, I wish that I could come and see your garden. Being on bedrest sure isn’t fun. I’m tired of lying on my back all day.”
Hope thought about Janet and their stroll in the garden. “What about a wheelchair? My dat has one he doesn’t use much. I’m sure you could borrow it.”
“Really?” Hannah’s face brightened. “I would love that.”
Jonas paused from his meal. “It’s a good idea, Hope. When I walk you home later, maybe I could pick it up.”
When I walk you home. The sentence was music to her ears.
Hope smiled. “It sounds like a wonderful plan.” Her stomach tumbled at his eyes on her from across the table, and she was thankful she hadn’t served herself too much. She’d be lucky if she’d be able to finish the food on her plate with all the attention he gave her.
Less than a month ago she’d been counting down the days until she could leave Pinecraft and move north, but now? Now she wished time would slow. She wanted to spend as much time with Jonas as she could before he returned to Kentucky.
And Emma too. She glanced over at the young girl, realizing how quiet she was being. Her eyes were wide, and her cheeks flushed pink. She looked from Hope to her dat, and the girl’s desire was clear. She wants this as much as I do…
Dusk fell, and Ruth Ann ushered Hope and Jonas outside, refusing to let Hope help with the dishes. Jonas lit a hurricane candle. Then he motioned for her to wait a moment, and he went into the house through the back door. The candle flickered, just like the stars overhead. Jonas returned a few minutes later with a plate of chocolate chip cookies. A smile touched his lips.
Hope cocked her head. “I thought Emma was going to bring the cookies out?”
“Ruth Ann said Emma didn’t want to interrupt us. But… ” He lifted a piece of folded-up paper and handed it to her. “I think this is for you.”
Hope took the paper from his hand, unfolded it, and moved it closer to the light. “Dear Hope. Do you like oak meal cookies? Yes. No. Circle one. P.S. Come by tomorrow if the answer is yes.”
She chuckled. “So it seems I’m invited back.”
“So it seems.”
“I’ll have to tell Emma that I love both oak meal and oatmeal cookies, especially if they have raisins.” She looked to the door. “Emma’s pretty thoughtful. Not wanting to interrupt us like that.”
“She is thoughtful. She had to grow up too fast.”
“I’m sure that’s true. I can understand… ” Hope started and then paused. “No, I take that back. Dat’s only been sick—really sick—the last four years or so. When I was a child I… I had no idea how much his illness—his weak lungs—was taking a toll on him. He hid it well.”
“I think you can understand in part, Hope. I believe most of us see our parents as strong and indestructible. It’s hard for anyone to see a parent in poor health.”
“What was she like—Sarah?” The question was out before Hope had a chance to censor herself.
Jonas sucked in a breath and looked away.
Hope reached over and touched the cuff of his shirt. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have… ”
“No, I’m glad you did. It’s strange that, well, most people are afraid to say her name. People who knew her their whole life will carry on a conversation with me and not mention her once. It doesn’t seem right.”
“Maybe they don’t know what to say.”
“Maybe not, but I’d rather they say something—anything—than pretend that she didn’t exist.” He took in a deep breath and then turned to her. “Sarah grew up on a farm just down the road from ours. The first time I saw her she was just starting school and she passed us as we walked. She was driving a pony cart and acted as if she owned the road.”
Jonas chuckled and Hope joined him. “I can imagine Emma doing that.”
Jonas’s eyes widened and he looked at her. “You know what? I can too. I was worried about that, you know, Emma not getting the chance to know her mem’s personality as she grew, but I think God took care of that. Emma is like Sarah in so many ways.”
“That’s beautiful, that God gave her that.”
“So it doesn’t bother you, my—our memories of Sarah.”
Hope paused before she answered, not because she didn’t know her response, but because she was trying to put it into the right words.
“Not at all. In fact I’d be more worried if you didn’t mention her. The look in your eyes when you talk about Sarah shows me that you’re a man who can love deeply.” She pressed her lips together and added to herself, Someone who could love me deeply too.
They talked more about their memories during their growing-up years, and Emma was already in bed when Jonas went inside for a flashlight to walk Hope home.
When he’d finally left with the wheelchair, Hope got ready for bed, but she had a hard time falling asleep. Her thoughts of the past continued, taking her back to their home in Walnut Creek. When they moved to Pinecraft they’d sold most of their things, including the large hutch in the dining room. It had been filled with china, most of which Mem had picked up at auctions. The hutch had glass doors, and the inside of the doors had been lined with obituary cards. Since the Amish didn’t take photos, it was one way they remembered those they’d lost.
Sarah Sutter. What had she been like as a wife? But as quickly as that thought entered her mind another was added to it: Hope Sutter. She liked the ring of that, but heat rose to her cheeks, and she was glad that Lovina was asleep not to hear her gasp. If she and Jonas fell in love, would that love ever match up to his first wife? Hope wished it would. Wished it more than anything. Wished it enough to put aside all her plans to see what God’s plans for them together were.
Haystack Supper
1½ cups evaporated milk
2 cups finely shredded cheddar or American cheese
Salt and pepper to taste
⅛ tsp. paprika
Cracker crumbs
Cooked brown
or white rice
Shredded lettuce
Onions, chopped
Tomatoes, chopped
Cauliflower, chopped
Green bell peppers, chopped
Corn chips
Taco-seasoned browned ground beef
Salsa
First, make cheese sauce. Heat evaporated milk in saucepan until very hot, but not boiling. Add cheese and stir until it begins melting. Remove from heat and continue stirring until sauce is smooth and creamy. Add spices to taste.
Layer remaining ingredients on plates or in a large bowl in order given. Top with cheese sauce.
Chapter Twenty-Five
You only live once, but if you work it right once is enough.
AMISH PROVERB
Hope had slept in, mostly because she was dreaming of a beautiful farm—maybe in Kentucky. She wasn’t sure, but it slowed her pace, and she didn’t arrive at the garden until nearly 7:30. Her breath caught when she rounded the corner and saw a surprise guest. Emma stood in the garden, pressing a small box to her chest. Her shoulders slumped forward and her head was lowered. She looked like a statue she stood so still.
Hope stepped forward. “Emma?”
Emma’s head lifted, and she turned. She extended her hands out as if offering the box to Hope. “I—I brought this to show you. I—I wanted to share a secret.” Her words came out with a sob and Hope took the box from her hands. It was the size of a cigar box but it looked handmade of pine.
“Did you want me to open it?”
Emma nodded. “Ja… but something fell out. I don’t know where it is.”
Hope lifted the top of the box. There was no hinge and the top slipped off easily. Inside was a collection of things—a bird’s tiny egg shell, a keychain from Shipshewana, a recipe for hummingbird cake, a small autograph book that she guessed was filled with signatures and poems from Emma’s friends. There were also a few letters. She glanced at the return address. Both letters were from a girl named Emma—most likely pen pals. And in the corner of the box was a pretty marble and a piece of yarn tied at the ends so Emma could play cat’s cradle.
“These are wonderful keepsakes. I had a box of treasures just like this when I was a little girl.”
Emma’s hand covered her face, and her shoulders shook.
Hope bent down on one knee beside her. “What’s missing, what did you lose?”
“Mem’s card… It had her name on it. I got it when she… she… ”
Emma didn’t continue, but Hope understood. A lump formed in her throat as she looked into the little girl’s dark brown eyes. “Was it your mem’s funeral card?”
Emma nodded. “Ja.”
“That was so special that you wanted to share it with me. I would love to see it.”
“But it’s gone. I lost it. I dropped my box… ”
Hope stood. “Will you show me where? I can go with you. We can look together.”
Emma wiped her eyes and nodded. Hope put the lid on the box and tucked it under her arm. She then extended her hand and smiled as Emma put her small hand in Hope’s larger one. They walked together back toward Ruth Ann’s house. About halfway there Emma rushed forward. She pointed to a small hedge next to the road. Hope quickened her steps. They paused in front of the hedge.
“A bike was coming,” Emma said. “I went to move out of the way and my box spilled.”
On the ground a flash of something glimmered in the sunlight. Hope bent down. There was a marble on the ground, similar to the one in Emma’s box. Hope looked around, but she didn’t see anything else. She opened the lid and added the marble to the box, and just as she was about to tell Emma that she didn’t see it, a card caught her attention. It had somehow gotten stuck in the hedge. Hope reached out and picked it out of the branches. It was off-white and the size of a small envelope. She turned it over.
In Loving Memory of Sarah A. Sutter
July 17, 1986 – January 10, 2013
Visitation Tuesday, January 13, 2013
to be held at the late home, 156 Lawson Lane, Guthrie, KY 42234
Funeral Wednesday, January 14, 2013
Northwest District Amish Church, Crofton, KY
Officiating Bishop Jonathan Kanagy
Burial to follow at Northwest Amish Church Cemetery,
Guthrie KY 42234
“For the hope which is laid up for you in heaven, whereof ye heard before in the word of the truth of the Gospel.”
Colossians 1:5
Tears filled Hope’s eyes as she read the card. There was a poem there, but Hope didn’t take time to read it. Seeing the card, Emma’s face brightened. She smiled and her nose wrinkled. She took the card from Hope. Hope opened the box, and Emma put it inside.
Hope blinked back her tears. “I’m so happy that you brought this to share with me, Emma. From now on we’d better keep it at your house. I don’t want you to lose any of this. These things are special.”
“I just wanted to show you.” Emma’s lower lip trembled. “Dat told Aenti Ruth Ann that you were special.”
“He did?”
Emma nodded.
“Well, I think your dat is special too. Does he know where you are?”
“He knows I was going to the garden. He said he’ll meet me there and we’d walk to school together.”
“Well, in that case we should get back to the garden. I also have a feeling that more people will start showing up soon. We get a lot of visitors.”
Emma walked beside Hope, holding her hand. “Do you like visitors, Hope?”
“You know, it used to bother me, but it doesn’t much anymore. God has helped me with that.”
“Did you pray about it?” Emma’s eyes widened.
“Ja, I did. And I can tell God is at work in my heart, Emma.” Hope glanced down at the girl, wondering if she understood.
“I’m praying about something too.” Emma reached up, taking Hope’s hand. She squeezed it tight.
From the look on Emma’s face it was clear what she was praying for. Emma wanted a new mem. And she’d brought the funeral card to show Hope that she still had a place in her heart saved for her biological mother too.
Hope lowered herself onto one knee and allowed the young girl to wrap her arms around her shoulders. Hope took Emma into her embrace and squeezed. “I’ll pray with you, sweet girl. I will pray that God gives you the desires of your heart, if that is in line with His perfect plan.” She closed her eyes, breathing in the scent of her, and it was only the sound of footsteps that caused her to open them. There, at the corner of the building, Jonas stood watching them. Hope offered him a smile, and he smiled back. He looked like a pleased father, thankful that she was caring for his little girl. Yet deep inside Hope’s question remained. Did he only want a mem for Emma? Or did he want her for himself as his bride? Would their relationship be moving at the same pace if it was just the two of them? Hope wasn’t certain, but she liked to think so. She wanted to be loved by this man as a wife, not just someone’s mother. As much as she loved Emma, she needed to know that Jonas was offering his hand not because of what she could provide for Emma, but what Hope could give to him—her heart, her life, her future. Until the last breath she breathed, just like Sarah had.
Hummingbird Cake
3 cups all-purpose flour
1 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. salt
2 cups granulated sugar
1 tsp. cinnamon
3 eggs, beaten
1 cup vegetable oil
1½ tsp. vanilla extract
1 8-ounce can crushed pineapple (with juice)
1 cup chopped pecans
2 cups chopped bananas
Cream cheese
Butter
Powdered sugar
Vanilla extract
Combine flour, baking soda, salt, sugar, and cinnamon in a large bowl. Add eggs and oil, stirring until moistened. Do not overmix. Stir in vanilla, pineapple, ½ cup pecans, and bananas. Pour batter into 3 greased and floured round cake pans. B
ake for 25-30 minutes. Cool for 10 minutes before removing from pans. When completely cooled, combine cream cheese, butter, powdered sugar, and vanilla to make icing. Spread over top and sides. Sprinkle top with remainder of pecans.
Chapter Twenty-Six
There is no beauty without purpose.
AMISH PROVERB
It was hard to believe that nearly two months had passed since Hope had first written her goals for the year, and now February was nearly through. She’d spent at least part of each day with Jonas and Emma. They had become as close to her as family. It seemed as if she’d known the two her whole life, and Hope didn’t want it any other way.
The house was quiet, except for a slight shuffling in the kitchen, when Hope rose. It was late—nearly six o’clock. Back in Ohio the days had started early, spring, summer, fall, or winter. Dat had been up before four o’clock, feeding livestock and milking the cows. She and her sisters always helped with chores too. Sometimes they helped with the milking or gathering the eggs. Lovina usually stayed inside and helped in the kitchen, and when winter slipped into spring Hope found herself in the garden. In Pinecraft it seemed almost every day was a good one to be in the garden.
It was going to be a big day with the Gospel Express auction, and Mem was already up and making breakfast. Oatmeal was on the stove, and she was scrambling eggs. Hope considered stopping by the auction later. It depended on who would show up at the garden. The children weren’t coming today, but there were always new tourists in town. A smile touched her lips as she considered that. She still enjoyed her quiet and peace, but she’d made many new friends from Amish communities all over the United States.
