by J. L. Ostle
“All this will look good on my college applications, of course, but music is my life and if I can get a toe in the door to let it be my actual life, I will do whatever it takes.”
“You’ll be playing?”
She nods. “Yup.” She pops her p. “I hope I’m good enough, enough to impress someone.” She looks to me and then stands.
“I’m sure you will be great.” I smile.
“Thank you.” I am so enthralled with her eyes that when I lean forward to get the screwdriver, I don’t look at what I’m doing. I flinch when I feel something sharp slice my hand and it instantly starts bleeding. I must have touched something sharp on the lighting. “Hurry, come with me,” Sasha says, grabbing my other hand. We jog out of the gym and to the nurse’s office where she just walks in, without knocking or anything, and pushes me on the slabbed bed as she grabs the first aid box.
“Won't we get in trouble for being here?” I look around the room. Sasha opens the box and starts rattling through it.
“No, she’s gone for lunch, and besides, no one comes in here during lunch period. Now hold still, this will hurt.” She uses a wipe which has something on it that causes a sting when she cleans the cut.
“Fuck.” I groan.
“Don’t be such a baby.” She bites her lip as she concentrates and the pain I was feeling is gone as my eyes focuses on her mouth. She looks back up to me and we both pause, just for a moment, before she shakes her head and grabs a bandage, wrapping it around my hand. “It doesn’t look like it needs stitches or anything.” She puts the first aid box away and puts the used stuff in the trash.
“Thank you.”
“Anytime.” She starts to head to the door.
“Sasha,” I call out and she turns, giving me a questioning look. I jump off the bed and walk towards her. “I was wondering if you’ve ever watched me play.”
“Sorry, I don’t watch football. I find it very boring.” I chuckle at her honesty.
“Well, maybe you should watch me train sometime. Tomorrow, come to my practice.”
“Why would I do that?” She crosses her arms.
“Because you want to see what the fuss is all about,” is all I say as I walk around her and head to the cafeteria. I really hope she does come.
I walk into the cafeteria to my usual table, glaring at Danny and Nathan. They wear apologetic faces while Aaron has a shit eating grin, knowing I’m going to give them an ass kicking.
“Where the fuck were you guys? Do you want me to get suspended? Do you not want me to play in our next game? If that’s the case, just tell me now and I’ll let Mr. Atkins kick my ass out,” I grunt out.
“Hey, man, we’re sorry, there were a couple of cheerleaders, you know how it is.” Nathan chuckles and I just glare at him.
“Do you think those cheerleaders will be all over you if you lose the next game? We are a team and we need to help each other out. Stop thinking with your dick, you get me?” He nods.
“Bros before hoes,” Aaron says, leaning back and I roll my eyes.
“How was working with the music nerds?” Danny asks me. I don’t mean to, but I look over the room to where Sasha is laughing with her friends and when I look back to the guys, all their gazes are on where I was staring.
Shit.
They all give me knowing smiles and I inwardly groan.
“She is a nice piece of ass.” Danny looks back over to her. “She has that sexy, nerdy, librarian look to her. Is she your next conquest?” Before I have a chance to answer, Aaron starts laughing.
“He wishes.” He continues laughing. “She can’t stand being around him. You should have seen her before, stomping over to the principal’s office because she didn’t want us jocks to be anywhere near the talent show. He has as much of a chance with her as I have with our English Lit teacher.” Nathan and Danny chuckle with him.
“I think if he wanted to, he could bag her,” Danny says.
“You didn’t see how she was around him.” Aaron leans back in his chair. He didn’t notice that she was actually nice to me once we were alone.
“I agree with Danny boy, if Colin wanted to fuck her, it would happen. Come on, it's Colin. Who says no to Colin?”
“Guys…” I try to butt in.
“You wanna bet?” Aaron sits up straight.
“If you are prepared to lose.” Danny smiles.
“You are so on.”
“Guys, you do know I’m right here, right?”
“You think you could get close to Miss Goody, Goody?” Aaron asks me.
“If I wanted to, but that’s not the point…”
“Right, let’s see how far Mr. Player can go then. If he can get her to sleep with him then you win,” Aaron says, interrupting me again.
“What do we get if we win?” Nathan asks.
“Guys…” I try and stop this.
“Two hundred bucks.” I get ignored again. Danny and Nathan laugh.
“Not worth it.”
“Fine, five hundred.”
“Deal.” They shake hands and I put my own up in exasperation.
“Aren’t you forgetting one thing?” They all look at me, confused.
“What?” Aaron asks.
“For me to agree with this childish shit. I am not going to try and fuck someone because you guys made a stupid bet.” I stand up and head towards the doors. I hear my name being called out and a few girls bat their eyelashes as I walk past them.
“Come on, don’t you want to see if you really are God’s gift? To see that you can really have anyone you want?” Nathan pleads to me.
“Even though in the process we are fucking someone over?”
“You fuck and ditch all the time, so why would this be any different?” I hate how he is describing me. I’m not that bad. I look back to Sasha and yeah, I would love to get between her thighs, feel her tight cunt around my dick, but knowing I’m doing it for my friends to earn money seems seedy.
“I think deep down he knows he won’t win,” Aaron tries to goad me. “He knows she will turn his ass down.”
“See, you have to prove him wrong. Let’s do a bet on how far he can get. Each base he gets to, one hundred dollars is added. One hundred for a passionate kiss.” Aaron rolls his eyes. “Two hundred for under the shirt feel up, three for a hand-job, four for a blowjob, five if she lets him go down on her, and six if they fuck.”
“What do I get out of all this?” Aaron complains.
“You scared he will be able to do any of those things?” Nathan chuckles.
“Sex is harder than a fucking kiss.”
“Fine, he has a week to reach a certain base. Week one, he needs her to kiss him, the second week for her to let him feel her up, etcetera. If he doesn’t manage that base on that certain week, you win the money for that week. Makes sense?”
“I think so. Okay, you’re on.” They shake hands again, I groan.
“You still need me to agree to this.”
“Come on, if she does let you get that far, just think how good the prize will be. All that money and you get your dick wet by that tight ass.” Danny pats my shoulder. I really don’t feel right doing it, but with all the guys looking at me, I groan and nod in agreement and they all cheer.
“Well, your first week starts now. Good luck.” Aaron smirks at me. I am already starting to regret this.
I watch as Sasha leaves through the back doors and, without thinking, my feet start chasing after her. I don’t know what I’m doing but I call out to her, and when she stops and faces me, her face is all scrunched in confusion, I can’t help but smile at her cuteness.
“What’s up?” she asks me, her head turned to the side a little.
“I was wondering if I could walk you to class?” I see the wheels turning in her head before she shrugs.
“Okay.” She starts walking and I fall in beside her. The walk is silent, no words are forming and I have no clue what to say. My friends are betting to see if I can fuck you, what do you think of tha
t topic? Yeah, I can’t say that. I’m still trying to figure out what to say when I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket. I pull out my phone and see a text from my dad. He’s working late.
Again.
“Are you okay?” Her voice pulls me out of my trance.
“Yeah, fine.”
She nods. “Your forehead was all scrunched up, that’s all.” Out of reaction, I press my fingers to my forehead.
“It was my dad.”
She nods again. “And you don’t get along with him?”
“I hardly see him. The only way he communicates with me is through text messages.”
“I’m sorry to hear that” We walk in silence again.
“What about your dad? Are you close?” Her eyes dart to the ground as she walks.
“I was close to my dad. He passed away four years ago.” I feel even shitier than I did before.
“I’m so sorry.”
“You didn’t know,” She whispers as she swats away a stray tear. “God, look at me.” She chuckles. “Bet you didn’t plan for this on the walk to class.” I stand in front of her and grab hold of one of her hands.
“I’m glad that you opened up. If you ever want to talk, depressing or not,” we both chuckle, “I’m here.” She looks up to me with her big eyes and I know I should walk away, leave this poor girl alone, but her eyes are drawing me in, trapping me.
“Good to know. Might hold you to that.” She smiles.
“Please do.” We walk in silence again.
“So, are you going to watch me practice? See what your talent show is investing in?” I eventually ask and she laughs.
“I’ll think about it.” Her smile is so contagious that I can’t help smiling with her. We get to her class and stand there facing one another. “Thank you for walking me to class.”
“Anytime. It was fun.” She shakes her head.
“Liar.” She chuckles and I move closer to her, lifting her chin so her eyes connect with mine.
“I enjoyed walking with you.” My eyes train on her mouth when she licks her lips and I’m dying to press my mouth against hers. “There’s a party this Friday. Come.” I want to spend more time with her. The more I’m around her, the more I’m fascinated by her.
“Is that an order or a request?” she breathes out, making my whole body vibrate with pure want.
“Both.” I step back.
“Maybe.” She smiles and heads into class. I watch as she sits in her seat and she looks surprised when she notices I’m still standing there. I probably look like a weirdo but when she smiles brightly at me, giving me a little wave, it makes it worth it.
Sasha
I drive home after school and when I open my garage, where me and my band practice, I see they are already there. Including Karen, who is the guitarist/manager. She’s glued to social media most of the time anyway, so we make her promote us and keep our website up-to-date.
“Why haven’t you been replying to my messages?” Karen waltzes up to me. Since Colin took me to class, rumors already spread around school and Karen was first to question me. I switched off my phone and decided I would wait until now to talk to her.
During the rest of school, my mind kept drifting off to Colin. I still don’t understand why he wanted to walk with me. I wasn’t really all that nice to him. God, I can’t believe I talked to him about my dad, got all emotional in front of him. But him holding my hand, touching my chin. Wow. His touch makes this electric energy surge through my entire body and I know he is going to be trouble.
I can feel it.
“Colin walked me to class and we talked, that’s it.” I head to my guitar, placing the strap around my shoulder.
“I heard his body was basically pressed against yours. He was holding your face.” Her hands go to her hips. Our school really needs to get a life.
“He touched my chin, he was being nice.”
“Who touches chins?” I don’t mean to, but I burst out laughing.
“Well, obviously, he does.” I continue laughing.
“What were you two talking about?”
“He asked me to watch him practice sometime and invited me to a party.” Karen’s mouth hangs open.
“Colin Baxter asked you to a party? Holy shit, he likes you. He wouldn’t ask you to go if he didn’t like you.” She squeals.
“He was just being nice.”
“He likes you.” I feel my face blush.
“Come on, let’s practice and stop talking about Colin.”
“Yes, please. I can already feel my mind turning into mush,” Brady, our drummer, groans. Brady looks like a stereotypical nerd. Gel slicked brown hair, huge dark framed glasses, and a love for plaid shirts. But, damn, he can play. People are always in awe when they watch him.
“Sorry Bards.” Karen gets to her spot. I adjust my microphone that’s right in the center. I turn to make sure Karen is ready and she gives me a thumbs up. I look to my right to see Leo, our bassist, is also ready. Leo is more on the gothic side, with black eyeliner and black hair but he’s a fun guy.
I face forward and when Brady taps his sticks and starts to play, we all join in at the right moments. When it’s time for me to sing, I close my eyes and let the words come out of me. I don’t need to see what I’m doing. I’ve been playing the guitar since I could hold one.
We play the song three times until we are happy with it and have adjusted any keys we feel needed improving. We really do work well together as a team. Music is our life; we breathe, eat, and sleep music and if we want to make something of ourselves, we need to be perfect. The talent show is going to be a big step up.
We continue the same flow with a few of our original songs and some covers. We want the covers to sound more like us, to put our stamp on them. After a couple of hours, we all take a break and sit on the old couch that sits on the left side of the room.
“I always think we can’t get better, but, somehow, we do, if that’s even possible. We are going to blow everyone’s socks off at that talent show.” I look over at Karen and see she is on Facebook, updating our page. Not many people have liked our page yet, mostly close friends and family, but it’s a start.
“Okay, done.” Karen puts her phone away. “I think we rocked ass.” We chuckle at her. “So, what about this party? Are you going?” I groan.
“I don’t know.” That’s the truth. A part of me wants to go, that’s the part that really wants to see Colin again.
“I think you should.” Karen looks at me.
“I’ll think about it. I don’t really want to go on my own though and look like a weirdo sitting in the corner with no friends.” That’s also true; I would look so pathetic if I went on my own, not talking to anyone and eye stalking Colin. Yeah, not an impression I want to give off.
“We can go if you don’t think Colin would mind.” Karen shrugs. It is a party, and if he invited me, he wouldn’t mind me inviting my friends, he would understand I couldn’t go on my own.
“That would be great.” I smile and Karen squeals, making my ears pop. “We are going to a real house party, just like in the movies.” She shakes my arm in excitement.
“Please don’t be like this at the party.” I moan.
“Be like what?” She looks at me, confused.
“All high pitched and hyper.”
She scoffs “I can be cool.”
“Cool people don’t say they are cool,” Brady adds in and she sticks her tongue out at him. “So, is that invite open to all of us?”
“I don’t see why not.”
We chill for a little bit before everyone starts to grab their things and leave. I tidy up and close the garage door and decide to take a walk. With mom going on another date, there’s no need for me to be inside yet.
I put in my earphones, pressing play on my phone. The first song that hits my ears is Disturbed ‘The Sound of Silence’. I start walking with no destination in mind. I aimlessly wander, music playing. Thinking about everything.
Past, pr
esent, and future.
I’m still in my own head when I realize I’m at the lake. Looking out into the water, I decide to sit down on the clean-cut grass, my knees tucked into me. It's moments like this where I miss my dad.
He loved going for walks. Every weekend he would wake me up just so we could come here and watch the sunrise, staring in awe as the colors hit the sky. We would just sit there and watch, no words being said.
I hate that God took him away from me. Well, if there is a God. It’s a selfish thing to think, but I wished he took someone else, knowing I needed him. He gave me my most precious gift; music.
He bought me my first guitar, he took me to so many concerts, allowing me to listen to all kinds of music, making me appreciate that each type is just as special, just as moving, as the last. I want him to see me play. Even just once.
I sigh, closing my eyes. “I miss you, Daddy,” I whisper. My eyes are still closed when my body is suddenly being pinned down. When I open my eyes in shock, they connect with clear blue ones.
“Colin, are you trying to give me a heart attack?” My breathing comes in fast.
“I saw you sitting here and, what can I say? I couldn’t help myself.” He smirks at me.
“Are you just going to keep laying on top of me?” His eyes go dark at my words. It's then my body starts to come alive, Energy vibrating through as his body presses into mine.
“I kind of like where I am actually,” he says huskily, leaning further into me, laying on his forearms.
“I hope you’re comfortable.” My voice comes out a little breathy.
“Very.” Is all he says. His eyes stay on mine, and the more he stares at me, the more my body is screaming for him. I lock my legs around his waist and his eyes grow wide. Before he has time to think, I use all my body weight to flip him so I am now the one on top.” “Fuck.” He groans.
“Comfy now?” I tease.
“How the fuck did you learn to do that? It was hot, but fuck.” He squares his shoulders.
“Self-defense classes. Glad you think getting your ass handed to you is hot.” He relaxes and places his hands on my hips.
“I do have a great view.” He smiles sweetly at me. I try to stand, but he grabs onto my hips tighter, forcing me to sit back on top of him. “Don’t move, I like you on top.” He winks at me, causing me to laugh.
