Escape. He’d said the word out loud I barely let myself whisper furtively in my head. Did I dare let myself believe it? Was it really possible that there was a place where we could live without the constant, strangling threat of deactivation?
“And Markan,” I cut in suddenly. “We have to take Markan too. I don’t care if he’s not a glitcher.” I said it with such certainty I almost sounded angry. I blinked, surprised at myself, but Adrien only nodded.
“Of course. But”—he had that pained expression again on his face—“we can only take Markan because there’s a hope he’ll be a glitcher like you. We can’t take your parents. Even away from the Community and the Link, there’s no way we’ve found to extract the adult V-chip hardware without it killing the subject.”
“Why?” I asked. “Surely you have the equipment to take the hardware out.”
“It’s not that. By the time people reach adulthood and get the invasive final V-chip installed, they can’t survive without it regulating their limbic functions. Their brains become completely dependent on the hardware. We can keep them alive on life support, but the damage just gets worse till they’re brain-dead.”
“It’s all so horrible,” I whispered, his words sinking in. “How could human beings do this to one another?”
“It’ll be okay.” Max moved closer and put an arm around my shoulders. “I would never let anyone hurt you.”
“But Max,” I said, pulling away from him in exasperation, “this isn’t just about me. There are so many other people out there being hurt. We have to help them.”
His jaw hardened. “You can’t just save everyone—”
Adrien cut him off. “Maybe not everyone, but we can help some. I know there’s at least one more girl. I had a vision of her a couple days ago. I’d been laying low so they wouldn’t notice anything anomalous about me, but I had to contact you after I saw the vision. Her name’s Molla—she’s a year behind you at the Academy and she’s been glitching for a couple weeks now. She’s not handling it well. If we don’t get to her soon, they’ll crack her for sure.”
“What are her powers?” Max asked, glaring at Adrien.
Adrien shook his head. “I don’t know, that wasn’t part of the vision. I’m not even sure they’ve manifested yet. She’s been glitching such a short time, and they don’t always show up right away.”
“Maybe we should wait until we see if she’s worth it,” Max said. “There’s no point in risking exposure if she isn’t powerful enough to be useful to us. It’d just be dead weight.”
“Dead weight.” My mouth dropped open. “She’s a person, Max!”
He waved a hand. “You know what I mean.”
“No, I really don’t,” I said, suddenly furious.
Adrien cocked his head sideways, listening. “Your brother’s getting off the treadmill. These walls are cracking thin. We can’t risk talking anymore.”
“Fine.” My whole body shook in frustration at Max. “I’ll try to talk to Molla tomorrow. Will you point her out to me?” I asked Adrien.
“Yes,” Adrien whispered, “but be careful. New glitchers can be unstable, sometimes they struggle with it and turn themselves in. The Chancellor’s been watching you very closely ever since you disappeared, so you gotta be crackin’ careful with how you approach Molla. If she’s skittish, back off, or we could get all cracked.”
I nodded. “I’ll be careful. Now you guys, go.”
Max’s jaw set. “Not until after he does.”
“Max!” I barely managed to keep my voice under control. Everything that came out of his mouth tonight made me want to punch him.
“It’s fine,” Adrien said calmly. He looked at me, like he wanted to say something. After a moment he just closed his mouth, shook his head, and climbed up the ladder to my loft bed. He lifted his body up through the square space of the ceiling tile he’d removed.
The door to my room suddenly opened and I felt my heart stop cold. It was Markan.
I clenched my fist tightly behind my back, my fingernails digging into my palm as I stifled a yelp of surprise.
Markan was sweaty from the treadmill, but his eyes were sharp and alert as he scanned the room. He looked back and forth between Max and me, his forehead furrowing. Max and I stood still. I held my breath, wanting to look up and make sure that Adrien was gone, but made myself resist. I forced my eyes to stay on Markan, knowing I’d give something away for sure if I glanced at the ceiling.
“I heard voices,” Markan said, his head tilted sideways as he looked at me with an uncanny acuity.
“Maximin and I were discussing an Academy assignment.” My voice was a little high in spite of my attempt to control it.
Markan’s gaze quickly shifted to Max. “I thought I identified more than two voices.”
My neck stiffened, but Max didn’t flinch.
“You were incorrect,” Max said coolly.
Markan’s gaze flicked around the room, but then he exited, sliding the door behind him.
After the door was securely shut I immediately looked up. The tile was only half closed. Markan hadn’t seen the tile slightly askew, or else we would all have been reported. Adrien didn’t say anything, but Max and I watched in silence while he shifted the tile quietly into place above us.
I looked back at the door Markan had just shut. If he’d walked in just one moment earlier, or if he’d glanced up and seen the tile … a terrified chill clutched my chest.
I was about to say something, but Max put a finger on my lips and shook his head. His glance went toward the door and I knew what he was thinking. Markan might still be listening. We were all trained to investigate and report anomalies, after all.
Adrien had just talked about living free in the Rez, apart from the Community, but I suddenly wondered if that wasn’t just a dream made of smoke. I felt with a sinking sureness that the day was coming when I wouldn’t be so lucky—when the Uppers would find me out for what I was. But what I hadn’t fully understood until now was the horrifying realization that it all could end so easily at the hands of the brother I was trying so hard to save.
Chapter 15
I FIRST SAW MOLLA in the crowded cafeteria and tried to memorize her face. At first glance, she looked ordinary, like the rest of us. One problem with all the monotone suits and functional haircuts was that they made it hard to tell us apart. She looked like most of the girls around her, but I did notice a sprinkling of freckles over her nose.
The more I watched her, the more I saw other ways she stood out. Little things, like the way she tapped her toe or fidgeted with her tablet strap. People around her walked in calm, measured movements, but she seemed to radiate nervous energy. I could see why Adrien was worried. At least she had managed to resist reporting herself. That was something.
Still, I felt anxious just watching her. My eyes flicked over to the Regs-in-training, trying to see if any of them were giving any attention to the restless girl. Their faces were impassive. It was impossible to tell what they were thinking. Besides, it was more the job of Monitors to look for more subtle anomalies, and Monitors could be anywhere.
I glanced around the room, trying to be unobtrusive as I did. The last thing I needed while worrying about Molla was to look anomalous myself. But the thought that any of the students I went to the Academy with every day could be a Monitor, secretly working for the officials … it sent a shiver of fear through me.
After a few more minutes, in spite of my fear, I stood up and made my way toward Molla. Just like Adrien had said, this girl didn’t have long before she was found out. We had to get to her first. The flood of students exiting blocked my way, though, and by the time I got to the column she’d been standing in front of, she was gone.
The rest of the day was just as disappointing. She wasn’t in any of my classes, since she was a year behind me. I caught sight of her once in the hallways but it wasn’t as if I could push my way through the stream of students to get to her without attracting notice. I went to
each class more frustrated than the last. But then I finally found my moment. Right before my last session of the day, I saw her slip into the bathroom. This was the best opening I was going to get.
I hurried as quickly as I dared across the hallway and into the bathroom after her. I peeked under the stalls. Only one set of feet. I went into the stall beside her and quickly popped the cap off the marker I’d brought from home. I grabbed a wad of toilet paper and scribbled a quick message on it: You’re not alone. We will contact you again soon. Until then, stay calm and stop fidgeting all the time! Flush after reading. I shoved the paper under the stall and hissed, “Molla!”
I saw her feet hesitate. Then slowly her hand came into view and she took the paper. After another minute, the toilet flushed again and I breathed out. Good. I unlatched the door and walked to the sink. I glanced at her. Her face was pale and she was staring at me, her eyes so wide they looked like they might pop out of her head. Then she turned and bolted from the room.
I started to call after her, but another girl came in. I put my hands under the spout and pretended I’d been washing them. I stood there, my hands under the water longer than necessary to hide their trembling. Max was right. This was a huge risk. I hadn’t thought about what I’d do if Molla didn’t believe me, or if she was caught and reported me. I hoped she’d flushed the note I’d given her like I’d instructed, but then she’d run away. What if she’d run straight to the Regulators?
I forced my back ramrod straight and walked out to the hallway. I made my face blank through the rest of the day, secretly terrified that I’d jeopardized everything. I wanted to signal to Adrien, to let him know what had happened. I’d wanted so badly to help, to do something, but on my first try I might have ruined Adrien’s entire mission.
That night at home, I waited impatiently until I saw the ceiling tile shift. I let out the tense breath I’d been holding and whispered the Link release words.
“I tried to talk to Molla,” I burst out in a vehement whisper as soon as I saw the shadow of his torso coming down through the hole in the ceiling. I was sitting on my bed waiting for him and I got up on my knees to talk to him as he settled beside me. “But I think I did it wrong. She ran away! What if I made everything worse? What if we’re all in danger now?”
“Zoe.” Adrien took my chaotically waving hands and shook his head. “You did fine. You made first contact. That’s cracking huge. It’ll make her more careful and hopefully she’ll be less afraid the next time we approach her.”
“But—”
“But nothing,” he said firmly. “Risks are part of everything we do. But we’re fine. We’re safe. Besides, with my Gift, I’m sure I’ll get a vision if we’re about to get cracked. Don’t worry about it.”
“Do you always?” I asked anxiously. “Get visions before something happens?”
I could see his thick lips curving up in the dim light from the night pod light by my bed. “How do ya think I lasted this long? It’s why the Rez sends me in on the long-term missions. I can see danger coming before it shunts things up.”
I sat a moment, taking in all he’d said. It was comforting to know we weren’t just barreling into a dangerous future completely blind. Still, it seemed too good to be true. “But do the visions always come true?”
“It’s too soon to tell for some of them, but I think so.” He sat back against the wall and I could see the outline of his silhouetted face. “Most of them have been fulfilled, but others haven’t happened—least I don’t think they have. I just know things will happen, not when or even how. I’m trying to hone it so I can get a clearer sense of timelines. It’s not perfect, but I’m getting better and better at it.” He smiled.
I looked at him quizzically. “How can you hone it? My powers just seem to happen.”
He nodded. “It was like that for me at first too. But I started to practice focusing the visions whenever I have them. Sure it’s cracking frustrating ’cause I have to wait for them—I can’t make them happen. But when they do, I try to slow them down, notice details—anything to get more control over it instead of it just crashing over me. The visions are getting more detailed too since I’ve been working on it.” He moved a little closer on the bed. “It’s one of the things I wanted to talk to you about. You should be practicing your telekinesis.”
I shuddered, thinking about it. It seemed to take all of my energy not to use my power. It was volatile, unpredictable, like a caged monster underneath my skin. It felt like only a matter of time before it hurt someone, or got me caught. So I kept it locked up tight inside, hidden behind my mask with the rest of my emotions.
“Think how much better it would be if you could call on it when you need it, like Max does with his,” Adrien said.
“It just always seems so risky when he uses his power.”
“It doesn’t have to be,” Adrien said, and I thought I detected some disapproval in his face. “Max takes a lot of risks, from what I’ve seen. But if you just practiced here at home where no one can see you, you could get to be in control of your powers. I could help you.”
“It only happens when I’m not thinking about it,” I said. “Like a reflex. And even then, it doesn’t always react the way I intend. Like on the train.” I swallowed hard. The pain of that night rose up and almost choked me. “People died that day because of my powers.”
“No, Zoe, you’ve got it all wrong,” his voice was low, but insistent. “People survived that day because of your powers. All the people on the train lived because you were able to set the train back on the cracking tracks. I survived that day, and it wasn’t even the first time you’ve saved my life!”
I couldn’t decipher the look on his face. It was so frustrating not understanding emotion. His features changed before I could even try to figure it out.
“Do you mind just giving it a try?” he asked. “We’ll start small, like with that pillow.”
I nodded reluctantly, and he settled in next to me, both of us facing the pillow at the top of my bed.
“Now, it sounds like for some reason your power works best when you’re in an emergency. It could be fear, or adrenaline, or some other reaction that allows you to access that power. Maybe with the right trigger, we can channel that so you’ll be able to call on it whenever you want.”
I nodded, my eyes never straying from the pillow. I stared at it intently, memorizing its shape and willing it to lift off the bed. I squinted my eyes shut, teeth clenched in concentration. I waited for the high-pitched buzzing that usually seemed to accompany my power.
Nothing. I kept pressing, my eyes boring holes in the pillow as I summoned memories of fear and dread and channeled it through my eyes toward the pillow.
Suddenly, Adrien picked up the pillow and tossed it in my direction. I gasped in surprise, then felt the soft thud of the pillow hitting my face.
“Why did you do that?” I asked.
“I thought maybe some element of surprise would help you.”
We stared at each other. Adrien looked at me, taking in my tousled hair and confused face, and his face slowly spread to a wide-eyed grin. His shoulders started to shake with silent laughter. Soon I joined him, my laughter muffled into the pillow he had thrown at me.
Adrien wiped at his eyes. “Okay, so that strategy clearly doesn’t work. Maybe we have to try something more dangerous next time.”
“If you wanted to scare me, a pillow is probably not the best choice.”
“Okay, we’ll try something else next time,” Adrien said, still laughing. “It was a good first practice, though. Just remember, Zoe. Keep trying. Find out whatever it is that gives you that power, and hold on to it.”
“But when I use my power, I can never direct it the way I want to.” I felt frustrated all over again. “It’s unsafe. There’s no way I can control it and keep it from hurting anyone.”
“That might be a risk you’ll just have to take. It’s the only way you can get better at it. See if you can access that power first, a
nd then we’ll worry about controlling it.”
The smile slipped from his face and he became serious once again. “There’s something else I need to tell you, too. About when you were away. I didn’t want to talk about it in front of Max the other night.”
“What?” I immediately frowned. “Is it something bad?”
His brows furrowed. “Sanjan—our crank who specializes in this kind of stuff—he said it shoulda been impossible for you to have an allergic reaction like you did without being exposed to it before. Maybe someone from the outside had some mold gnange on their clothes and you came into contact with them. Though secondhand exposure isn’t usually enough to do it.” He shrugged.
“Molds.” I sat back, frowning in thought.
He nodded slowly. “Yeah, the attacks would get worse every time you’re exposed. But!” He brightened, reaching back into the ceiling to pull down an aluminum case. “There’s some medicine we can try. It’s called immunotherapy. I brought it with me when I came back. It’s gonna mean regular injections, though.”
“For how long?”
“It could take months. But if we do the injections regularly, we might weaken the allergy enough to be able to get you out of here safely.”
I let go of the curl I’d been twirling. “Are you sure it will work?” My eyes flicked back up to him.
“I hope so.” He paused a moment before opening the aluminum case and just watched me. “Do you trust me? You did once. I hope you can again.” He seemed to see the hesitation in my eyes and ran his hand through his hair. “Look, I don’t wanna pressure you but the sooner we get started, the sooner we can see if it’s having an effect and start planning the escape.”
A thrill rushed through my body at the word escape. I nodded.
“Good. Then as soon as your allergy is neutralized, or the Rez can find a safe place for you to live with the allergy, we’ll take whatever other glitchers we’ve found and get the godlam’d hell out of here.”
Glitch (Glitch - Trilogy) Page 17
