“They took some information, but they did not tell me if they were going to go out right away or not. So I called the Delaware State Police and the New Castle County Police, but I was told it was a matter for the Wilmington Police. Finally, an officer called and said he was going to come by the house to talk to me within the hour. It was, like, nine-fifteen or so and I was frantic at that point.”
Kelly felt herself growing angry with her husband as he told her the details. He was frantic? Suddenly, she spat out, “Sorry to have frightened you so, Dan,” and then she turned her face away from him.
“Oh, Kel,” Dan said as he stroked her hair. “It wasn’t like that. I mean, I was so scared because I love you so much and I felt helpless. I wanted to run and run and comb every inch of Wilmington to find you but I knew that wasn’t going to work either. I am so sorry.” Dan made a sudden gurgling noise, and then the sounds of muffled crying.
Kelly had never heard Dan cry before, so she listened first with alarm, and then with a detached curiosity. She felt completely separate from him, as she lay with her arms wrapped tightly around herself. “Dan,” Kelly said impatiently, “Okay, okay! Please keep going. What happened next? The police guy on the phone was coming to the house….Then what happened?”
Dan took a few breaths, steadying himself. Then he began speaking slowly, carefully.
“Your mother showed up about nine-thirty or so, and just a few minutes after she arrived, the phone rang. Someone from the Wilmington Police Department told me they had found you in the woods and that you were on your way to the hospital.” Dan paused for a moment and swallowed. “When I got here they told me that you had been assaulted.”
Kelly felt her stomach tighten at Dan’s words. Then she snorted. “Assaulted? They said raped, didn’t they?” Dan was silent. Sounds of hospital staff being called in the hallway slipped into her room. “So, where is my mom?” Kelly sounded hostile.
“She’s home with the girls. She’s a little bit of a wreck too, but she does want to come see you. She just wants you to know she’s here in case you need her.”
“I don’t have the flu, or a broken arm, Dan. It’s not that simple.” Kelly surprised herself with her bitter tone.
Dan looked like he had been slapped. “Kel, I am doing my best. I really don’t know how to deal with my wife’s rape, okay?” Kelly was almost relieved to hear anger in Dan’s voice. It sounded much more natural under the circumstances. “I mean, you go out for a run and then you don’t return. The next thing I know, I’m in the hospital and my wife is a bruised and battered rape victim. I’m trying to process this and react to it, but I have no idea what to do. I have no idea what even happened. How did we get here?” Dan’s voice cracked again as he tried hard not to cry. He waited a few moments before he spoke again. “I love you, baby. I hate that you were hurt so much. I don’t know what to do. Tell me what I can do… I’ll do anything.” Dan’s voice grew desperate and he finally gave in to full sobbing. His big strong right hand softly caressed the back of Kelly’s head.
Kelly grabbed Dan’s hand with her hand and pulled it away from her head. “My head hurts. Please stop.”
Dan took a step back.
With her head turned away from Dan, Kelly spoke to him in a tired and quiet voice. “I can’t do it. I can’t do it.” Kelly started to cry again. Dan just stood there dumbfounded, afraid to talk or touch her. He looked up as a knock sounded and the door to the room opened suddenly. A tall, bearded man in a white jacket entered. Kelly didn’t turn or in any way acknowledge his presence.
“Hello… I am Doctor Kamali.” He and Dan shook hands.
“Dan Malloy, Kelly’s husband.”
The doctor cleared his throat. “Kelly, I have some findings about your injuries and instructions about your care after today. I’m talking about your CAT scan, X-rays, that sort of thing. I do not know anything about the rape kit, though.” He looked at Kelly directly. “Do you want me to talk to you with your husband here, or would you rather I talk to Dan outside while you get some rest?” The doctor’s question was met with silence. Kelly didn’t acknowledge him. She felt an overwhelming sense of fatigue and detachment. Dr. Kamali shrugged his shoulders at Dan and then motioned with his head toward the door of the room.
“I’m so terribly sorry about what has happened here to Kelly. It’s awful what people are capable of. The good news is, her scans showed no major damage. She has a mild concussion, so her head will be sore and she may be nauseous for a few days. She has also suffered some bad bruising on her back, her buttocks,her inner thighs and her pubic area, and she has rope burns and abrasions. The nurse will give you printed discharge instructions and a few prescriptions that you will need to fill right away. One is to be applied to her rope burns and scrapes a few times a day—just follow the directions on the label. There is also a medication to help her get some much needed rest in the aftermath of such a trauma.”
“Do you mean a sleeping pill?”
“No. It’s actually more for anxiety. I consulted with a staff psychiatrist here at the hospital, Dr. Scott, who has an appointment to follow up with Kelly in a week or two. Dr. Scott also advised that Kelly meet with and talk to a counselor who specializes in this sort of thing.”
“Who?” Dan looked confused.
“The state or the city—I am not sure which—provides this resource whenever there has been a sexual assault. A licensed and certified counselor who specializes in sexual abuse victims is available to meet with Kelly and help her try to work through the emotional and psychological injuries that she has sustained.”
Dr. Kamali put his hand on Dan’s shoulder, as if to fortify him for his next words. “Your wife was kidnapped and brutally raped. Her physical injuries fortunately will heal soon. It’s her other injuries—her pain, her fear, her self-esteem, her anger and a host of other emotions and psychological impacts—that will be with her for a long, long time. You are going to have to be very patient with her.”
“I will, of course,” Dan said, quickly, sounding defensive. Then the impact of Dr. Kamali’s words hit him. Brutally raped.
Dr. Kamali looked at his watch. “I am sorry, but I have to run to my next patient.”
“Of course. Thank you, Doctor.” Dan shook his hand and then watched him walk quickly down the hallway to his next patient.
Dan stood silently in the hallway of the hospital for what seemed an eternity, hearing sirens outside the building and urgent calls for doctors and nurses over the intercom. People donning green scrubs and white lab coats hurried by him, oblivious to his anguish. In the midst of this chaos, Dan was unable to move his feet, to take those steps that led him back to his wife and to what came next. He felt his hands clenching and unclenching into fists as he tried to block out the images that kept flashing through his head. A picture of another man, large then small, white, black, brown, in a sweatshirt, in a denim jacket, with black hair, curly hair, long hair, no hair, climbing on top of her, brutalizing and defiling her—his wife and the mother of his children. He couldn’t make out a face, but the ever-changing man attacked, assaulted and tried to destroy everything that Dan held dear.
Dan simultaneously struggled with feelings of rage, disgust, hurt, and the most uncomfortable one of all—fear. He was terrified at the thought that he did not protect his wife—that he could not protect her. He was also terrified at the thought of what could have been. If her attacker had wanted to kill Kelly, there had been nothing to stop him. Dan feared for his beautiful daughters, knowing now that there are dangerous and deranged men out there who could harm them for their own sadistic pleasure. And, he realized, as he turned to force himself to walk back into Kelly’s hospital room, he was most fearful of the broken person lying under the sheets on the hospital bed ten feet away.
Dan had always known who Kelly was, and he had always been certain about their life together. But now, as he re-entered her hospital room and approached her bed, he placed his feet slowly and carefully as if he were steppi
ng onto thin ice. He felt a colossal shift in what he thought was their life together. He silently resolved to be brave and strong and patient, and so he kept moving forward into the room and toward his wife.
CHAPTER 8
CHAD: SEPTEMBER 24, 2011
AS CHAD APPROACHED his driveway he felt sick with dread. The events of the morning had left him physically spent, and he still had to face his father’s rage. As he turned into the driveway, he was surprised and relieved to see that his father’s truck was gone. Chad quickly ran into the house. His hands were shaking as he poured himself a glass of water and stood leaning against the kitchen sink. He took a deep breath and tried to calm himself down. “Mom,” he called out, “where are you when I need you?” A deep and painful pang of longing hit him. She would have known what to do. Chad pictured her soothing the woman on the ground while Chad ran to call the police. Chad’s panic transitioned to deep regret, as he realized that was how the ordeal should have been handled.
To make matters worse, Chad spotted an empty bottle of Jack Daniels on the counter. He retrieved his father’s coffee mug from the sink and smelled the strong odor of Tennessee whiskey. He had seen the clues before and he knew what followed. His father became angry and belligerent when he was drunk.
Chad made his decision at that very moment. It was already nine-thirty and he was very late for work. His father would be too difficult to contend with, and Chad was already unable to cope with the range of emotions that gripped him. Someone had tied up a woman, attacked her and left her for dead…. in his woods.
He pulled the yellow pages phone book out and flipped to “Travel Agencies.” He ran his index finger down the column of listings, looking for the one that was closest to him and had Saturday hours. He circled in ink two agencies within five miles from his house, ripped the page out of the book and stuffed it into the front pocket of his Levi’s. Then he went to get his money out of his closet.
*****
Chad’s first stop was the local Wilmington Trust Bank branch. He did not have an account there, but he had been there with his mother on numerous occasions when she came in for deposits and withdrawals.
“Hello, son. Can I help you?” A heavy woman in a yellow dress asked Chad as he stood, looking a little lost, in front of the counter.
“Um, I just want to exchange coins and small bills for bigger bills. Can I do that here?”
“Sure,” the woman said. “Normally I would send you to a teller, but I’m not doing anything at the moment, so I’ll get you started. What are we talking about here in the coin category?”
Chad felt his cheeks flush in embarrassment as he pulled three bulging Ziploc bags out of his backpack.
“Wow!” The woman chuckled. “That’s a lot of coins. Fortunately, we have a machine for that!”
“Thank you, Ma’am.” Chad followed her to a large machine and watched the woman dump the coins into it. After a few minutes, it spit out a receipt for $213. As he walked out of the bank, Chad tucked his $847 worth of savings, now crisp new bills, carefully into his wallet and threw his shoebox and empty Ziploc bags into a garbage can.
Ten minutes later, bells jingled on the door of Adventure Travel Agency, and a bearded man looked up from a computer screen as Chad entered. “Hey, man, what’s your adventure?”
“Excuse me?” Chad muttered.
“Where are you going, dude?” The man looked at Chad with curiosity.
Chad noticed colorful posters depicting surfers skimming tall blue waves, climbers rappelling down steep rocky cliffs and skiers crashing through waist-deep powder. “Um, I want to go to Arizona,” he said quietly.
“Awesome,” the man said extending his hand. “I’m Ken. What are you planning out there? Camping? Rock climbing? Rafting maybe?”
“I’m not sure. I really just want an airplane ticket.” Chad said.
“Oh, I see. You’ll kind of just figure it out when you get there, huh?” The man looked back at his computer screen.
“Yes. Can I get an airplane ticket here?” Chad asked, again feeling self-conscious by his lack of experience and worldliness.
“Sure, man,” Ken said. “The Internet has sort of made us obsolete in the air travel category. People usually come to us for the whole adventure ticket—we have connections to get you the best services and equipment for adventure travel. But, hey, we still deal with the airlines, too. So, sit down,” he said, gesturing toward a grey plastic chair opposite his chair and desk, “and I’ll hook you up.”
“Okay,” Chad said sitting down.
“Where in Arizona do you want to go?” Ken asked.
“Scottsdale,” Chad said.
“Okay. Then you’ll be flying into Phoenix and then just get a local bus to Scottsdale. You’ll be leaving out of Philadelphia, right?” Ken asked.
“Um, yeah,” Chad replied.
“Round trip, right?”
“Uh, no, I’m moving out there,” Chad replied, this time sounding certain about where he was going and what he was doing.
“Oh, cool. People don’t realize it, but Arizona is very diverse in its geography and its climate. It can be snowing in a canyon up north and you can be swimming in the southern part of the state, all at the same time.” Ken rambled on as he typed into his computer, pulling up various options and screens and occasionally jotting notes.
For a moment Chad followed Ken’s words, imagining fiery red sunsets and giant canyon walls. But then he found himself drowning out Ken’s words, and instead picturing his mother’s face. He didn’t care where his mother was; he just knew that she was his home.
“When were you planning on going?” Ken asked, still looking at his computer screen.
“Today or tomorrow,” Chad said.
The travel agent looked up at Chad’s face, with surprise. “Wow! Man, you’re a bit spontaneous, aren’t you? What are you doing, running from a girlfriend or something?” Ken chuckled.
“Yeah, something like that.” Chad replied, shrugging his shoulders as he spoke.
“Let’s see what we got. You know the fares are cheaper when you don’t book them last minute. But at least this is not a holiday or anything. Can you travel late at night?”
“Yeah, I’m flexible.”
“Are you okay with a stop or two along the way?”
“It’s my first time on a plane,” Chad said. “So I’d really like to just take off and land once. But that depends on how much the different options cost.”
“Okay,” the agent said as he finished up the typing, comparing and jotting. “Here are your options. There’s a flight out in an hour that you would never make. There is also one tonight that is nonstop but completely booked. Tomorrow, we have a one-stop in Chicago then on to Phoenix. That costs four thirty-five, or, what I think is your better deal, there’s a nonstop that costs four seventy-five.”
Chad swallowed hard. His savings would be more than cut in half instantly. “I want the one that leaves tomorrow, nonstop.” Chad said. He knew without hesitation that he could not wait a minute longer to get away.
“Okay, then,” Ken spoke as he started typing again on his computer keyboard. “Flight 138 out of Philadelphia P-A to Phoenix, A-Z, leaving at four on September 25th.” A printer next to his desk started noisily churning out a page. Ken stood up and pulled the printed page from the machine. “Here’s the confirmation and details. If that is what you want, I can book it and print your boarding pass even. Of course, you’ll have to pay me first.”
“Okay,” Chad said as he pulled a roll of bills out of his wallet.
“Wow!” Ken said. “Real money. No one uses paper money anymore.”
“Well, I don’t have a credit card yet,” Chad said, embarrassed.
“I’ll have to see some I.D., though, man.” Ken said.
Ken took Chad’s driver’s license and made a photocopy on the same machine that had printed his confirmation a moment earlier.
“You’re all set,” Ken said, handing Chad his boarding pass, his
license and his change. “Have a good one and good luck in Arizona.”
Chad carefully put his license and his boarding pass into his wallet. He exited Adventure Travel with his hands tightly clutching the wallet, knowing its contents would lead him to his mother and away from the loneliness and the feeling of certain doom that engulfed him here.
CHAPTER 9
KELLY: SEPTEMBER 24, 2011
KELLY AWOKE TO find herself looking up into the face of a tall woman with very short blond hair. The woman looked down at Kelly with kind eyes, and she rested her hands lightly on the metal rail of Kelly’s hospital bed.
“Hi Kelly. I’m Detective Helen Becker, with the Delaware State Police. I specialize in sexual assault cases, so the Wilmington police have me helping out with your case.”
Kelly continued to gaze into the woman’s eyes but said nothing. She was exhausted and her whole body ached, but she found herself somehow comforted by this woman’s presence.
“I’d like to ask you some questions about what happened this morning, for the purposes of the investigation. Are you up for that?”
Kelly slowly nodded her head “yes” without opening her mouth.
“Okay, then.” Detective Becker retrieved a notebook and a pen. “Your husband already confirmed some background information for me, so let’s get right to what happened this morning, okay?”
Kelly sat up and pulled her knees against her chest. “May my husband come in for this?” Her head throbbed, her entire backside ached and she shuddered as she realized her inner thighs and her vaginal area felt bruised. She put her face against her knees and sobbed.
“Sure. Let me go get him.” Detective Becker replied quickly, relieved to leave the room as Kelly cried. A moment later, Dan followed her back through the doorway to Kelly’s room. He strained to mask the pain that he felt at the sound of his wife’s sobbing. He looked at Detective Becker, who shrugged as if she had no words for the situation.
Kelly wiped her eyes and took a deep breath. “I feel safer with you here.”
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