“It’s not just that. I’m scared. I care about Wesley. I really do. But I’m not sure that I’m ready to be anyone’s wife.”
“I know. I don’t think anyone is ever sure of that. You just have to trust your heart and move on with your life.” Ellen sat up with her back to the headboard.
“Aren’t you scared?”
Ellen blushed. “Sure, a little. But I know Patrick well enough to know he’d never do anything to hurt me. He cares about me.”
“And I know that about Wesley, too, but I talked to Harriett about…well, marital relations. She said the first time really hurts.”
Ellen didn’t respond because she knew that Harriett had a very different sort of marriage than Wesley and Malinda would have. She hadn’t been happy at all, and she knew that Malinda would be. The way Wesley looked at her told everyone how much he cared for her.
“Aren’t you worried about the wedding night?” Malinda asked.
Ellen nodded. “Obviously not as much as you are. When Patrick touches me, I don’t want him to stop. God wouldn’t have made the way to make children pleasurable for just men. Besides, I’ve had friends who have married and they said only good things about the marriage bed. I really don’t think we have anything to be afraid of.” She reached out and patted Malinda’s hand, hoping she would be calmer.
Malinda bit her lip. “Do you think if I married Wesley tomorrow he’d agree to wait for relations until I felt comfortable with it?”
Ellen shook her head. “I don’t think you should even ask that of him. I think if you marry him, he has every right to expect a wedding night.”
“Well, if I marry him and I’m not having relations with him, I’ll still be cooking, and cleaning, and doing all the other things he needs his wife to do. I’ll just sleep in his spare bedroom.”
Ellen let out a short laugh. “You wouldn’t like his spare bedroom. Patrick says the mattress is lumpy and almost impossible to sleep on.”
“Well, I may talk to him about it in the morning before the wedding. I decided to go in my wedding dress just in case I decide to marry him tomorrow as well. It seems unfair that you and Patrick are marrying before Wesley and I are.”
“That’s your decision, though. Patrick and I decided we wanted to marry and left it at that. You’re the one dragging your feet.” Ellen knew the words were unfair as soon as they popped out of her mouth. She loved her sister despite their differences.
Malinda stood up. “I’m sorry I was so mean to you about your decision to marry Patrick. I know you care about him, but I know you care about me as well.”
Ellen smiled up at her sister. “I’m really glad you’re going to be there when I marry Patrick.”
“How could I miss that? Of course, I’ll be there!”
Ellen watched as Malinda left the room, and then rolled to her side, snuggling into the pillow. She was marrying a wonderful man, and her sister would be there with her. What more could she ask for?
*****
Ellen went to the kitchen first thing the following morning as had become her habit. There were more pots going than Ellen had dreamed possible. Alice was obviously going all out as she fixed the special wedding lunch Ellen had requested. Alice turned from the stove and smiled. “How’s the bride this morning?”
Ellen felt as if her grin would split her face. “The bride is excited and nervous and happy all at once.” She felt as if she was floating as she skipped into the kitchen and took the toast Alice had fixed for her. She sat at the table in the kitchen and slathered blackberry jam onto the toast. “You make the best blackberry jam I’ve ever tasted. I’m going to have to get some cooking lessons from you.”
Alice nodded. “You can cook with me anytime. Just don’t get rid of me, please.” She said it with a laugh, because she already knew Ellen well enough to know she wouldn’t do anything of the sort. “My friend will be here in an hour to help you get ready. What time is the wedding?”
“Ten.”
“That should work out just fine then. You can take a nice hot bath and by the time you’re done, she’ll be here to fix your hair.”
Ellen nodded. “That sounds nice. Thanks so much for setting that up for me.”
“It’s no problem. I’d do anything to help Mr. Patrick get married to a girl who obviously has tender feelings for him. I really didn’t like the idea of him marrying Malinda after I’d met her.”
Ellen sighed. “Malinda is truly a good person. She’s just scared of a lot of different things. I think she’ll marry Wesley today.” She finished her toast and stood. “I’m going to go get started on that bath.”
“I’ve got hot water heating now. I’ll carry some up for you if you’d like.”
“Absolutely not. You have enough extra work to do with cooking the wedding lunch. I’ll get it myself. It’ll make me feel useful for a change.” The only thing Ellen was still worried about with being married to Patrick was the amount of free time she had. How quickly could she look for volunteer work to do without him thinking that being married bored her?
Once the tub was full of warm water, she sank down into it. She washed her hair with the soap Mrs. Smith had provided, and made sure she was clean from head to toe. She had just stepped out and dried herself when there was a knock at the door. Wrapping herself in the towel, she peeked out.
“Alice sent me? She said you needed help with your hair for your wedding.” The girl in front of her could be no older than sixteen or seventeen. She was wearing a frayed dress that was as clean as could be. Her hair was a bright red, and she spoke with a slight Irish accent.
“Come in! You’re just in time.” She looked around. “Would a robe be a good thing to wear? I’ve never had anyone fix my hair for me before.” She was looking forward to it, though. It would be nice to have her hair fussed with.
The girl nodded. “A robe would be perfect.”
Ellen turned her back to the girl and dropped her towel, wrapping the robe around her. She’d never been overly modest, but undressing in front of anyone went against the grain. “Where do you want me to sit? And what’s your name?”
The girl smiled. “I’m Angela. I guess I should have told you that.” She looked around the room, and finally pulled the arm chair from the corner placing it in the center of the room. “This will do nicely.”
Ellen sat down while the girl pulled out a brush and some hairpins. She chattered away about how much she loved weddings while she brushed Ellen’s hair dry. When she was finished, she carefully pinned up section after section.
“How are you fixing it?” She hoped it would be a style Patrick would like. Not that he seemed overly fussy, but she wanted an elegant look for her wedding to him.
Angela grinned. “I want you to be surprised. I think you’ll like it.”
Ellen bit her lip as she considered. “Do you have time to do my sister’s hair as well?”
“Oh, of course. I have all the time in the world.”
Ellen had never had anyone fuss with her hair the way Angela was. She and Malinda had dressed each other’s hair when they were young, just playing around with different styles, but neither of them had ever had anyone who knew what they were doing fix their hair for them.
Finally, Angela pushed the last pin in her hair and moved around in front of Ellen. “That’s perfect. Have a look.” She gestured to the mirror over the dresser and Ellen stood to peer into it.
Her hair had been fixed in a style she’d never before seen. It was as if it had been rolled from the bottom up all over her head. She smiled and nodded. “That’s perfect. Patrick’s going to love it.”
Angela looked excited that she’d liked it. “You’re a lucky woman to be marrying Patrick Harris. He’s a good man.”
Ellen nodded. “He really is. I think I’m very fortunate to marry him.” She opened the door and knocked on Malinda’s door across the hall.
Once the door was opened, she could see her sister had taken a bath as well and was in the process of getti
ng ready. “Malinda, this is Angela. She’s just finished fixing my hair for me, and I thought maybe you’d like her to do yours as well.”
Malinda’s eyes widened and she smiled. “Oh, I’d love that!” She grabbed Angela’s arm and pulled her into the room closing the door in Ellen’s face. Ellen let out a half laugh as she went back into her bedroom, knowing she’d been dismissed.
She pulled her wedding dress down from where it hung in the closet, and dropped her robe. After pulling on the stack of undergarments she’d laid out for herself, she carefully stepped into the dress, although she knew there was no way she’d be able to button every button. She’d planned to ask Malinda to help her, but she was ensconced in her room with Angela, and Ellen was certain she wouldn’t see her again for a while.
She buttoned as many buttons as she could on her own and ran down the stairs to the kitchen. “Alice?”
Alice turned and immediately saw the problem. She rushed around behind Ellen and buttoned the rest of her buttons and then turned her around to study her. “You look beautiful.”
Ellen sighed with relief. “Do you think Patrick will be pleased?”
Alice laughed. “I think Patrick would be pleased with anything you wore, but he’ll really like this dress. Did you make it yourself?” She walked in a slow circle around Ellen inspecting the dress from every angle.
It was a long white dress with lace that came up to her chin. It had a white satin bodice and skirt, but was covered with lace and had lace over her arms.
Ellen nodded. “I did. My sister helped. We made our dresses together. Malinda is an excellent seamstress.” Her sister was better at making tiny stitches that looked good on formal dresses than Ellen was. Ellen was fast, but her stitches weren’t nearly as pretty.
“It’s wonderful. You could make some money in a town like this with those skills. Of course, you don’t need the money, but your sister might be able to make some extra to add to the sheriff’s salary.”
Ellen decided to bring that up to her sister when she had the chance. It would relieve Malinda’s mind to know there was something she could do to help her household’s finances and maybe even support herself if anything ever happened to Wesley.
She went back up the stairs and put on her pretty white shoes she’d purchased just for the wedding. They were uncomfortable and impractical, but she wanted to look just right for her wedding day. It was the only frivolous purchase she’d ever really made.
Once she was ready, she sat on the edge of her bed, and breathed slowly to calm her nerves. As thrilled as she was to be marrying Patrick, she was still nervous, wondering how things would go once they were actually married. Glancing at the clock on the mantle, she saw it was quarter before nine. He’d be there any minute to take her and Malinda to the wedding.
She slowly walked down the stairs and saw him waiting at the foot. He was wearing a black suit and looked more handsome than she’d ever seen him. She smiled at him, not noticing that Wesley was standing right beside him, because she had eyes only for Patrick.
“Is your sister coming?” Patrick asked after kissing her hand.
She nodded. “She’s getting her hair fixed.”
They heard a door at the top of the stairs open, and she watched with the others as her sister came down the stairs. She looked like a princess in her beautiful white gown. Ellen hoped Wesley and Malinda would be able to sort things out in time to have a double wedding.
They all went to the buggy and she sat in the front with Patrick as she had when the men had first picked them up in Denver. It seemed like months since they’d stepped off the train instead of the four days it had actually been.
She could hear Malinda and Wesley talking in the back, but she couldn’t make out their words. When they reached the small church, Patrick put his hands on Ellen’s waist and lifted her down, making her feel as if she weighed nothing. Wesley helped Malinda down and kept his hand at the small of her back as he led her to the others. He looked annoyed, so Ellen assumed they’d decided not to marry right away.
“We’re going to get married as well, and make it a double wedding,” Wesley said his tone biting.
Ellen looked at Malinda, but her sister avoided her gaze. She probably didn’t want to know what their little fight was about anyway.
The two couples walked into the church together, and Ellen was surprised to see the number of people waiting for them. She’d expected a quiet ceremony with just the preacher, but there were at least fifty people there filling the pews. She and Malinda waited at the back of the church while the men took their places and walked to the front arm in arm. “Best wishes,” Ellen whispered in Malinda’s ear. They hugged one another before going to stand with their respective men.
The ceremony was brief, but the preacher seemed kind. He was an older man, around sixty, with silver hair.
Ellen was surprised at how steady her voice was as she repeated her vows. She was agreeing to spend the rest of her life with a man she’d known for only a few days, and felt no conflict for doing it. She stared into Patrick’s eyes as she promised to love, honor and obey him for the rest of her life.
Patrick held both of her hands in his as he repeated the vows back to her. His warm brown eyes made her feel as if she could sink into them.
When it was time for Malinda and Wesley to repeat their vows, she stood with her back to Patrick’s front and listened to them. Malinda sounded almost frightened, and Ellen felt as if she’d done something wrong to ask her to speed up the wedding.
When they finished their vows, she turned back around to face Patrick. The minister pronounced them men and wives and invited them to all kiss. Ellen felt shy about kissing Patrick in front of the people watching, but she raised her lips to his. He kept the kiss brief, but sweet, and then she was facing the onlookers.
They were immediately flooded with well-wishers, and Ellen was introduced to more people than she cared to count. Patrick kept his arm firmly around her waist, and she was thrilled by that. It was much easier to face meeting all those new people knowing that he supported her.
During a lull in the crowd, she turned her head to look at Malinda. Her sister looked miserable. What on Earth happened between them?
Patrick caught her look and turned to her with one eyebrow raised. His lips were against her ear as he asked, “What happened?”
She shook her head as the next people came to meet her.
Malinda and Wesley rode with them back to Patrick’s house for their wedding lunch, and several of the people who had been at the wedding joined them as well. Ellen hadn’t expected so many people and hoped Alice had anticipated this type of crowd. Once she was in the house, she knew the older woman had done her job to perfection.
There were several extra maids on hand to help serve, and she was thrilled with the turnout as she took her seat on Patrick’s right hand side. Wesley sat at the foot of the table with Malinda to his right, although the two seemed to be avoiding looking at one another.
The house had been decorated with flower bouquets strewn everywhere. The hall simply exploded with color, and the dining room had bowls of roses in pinks reds and whites throughout. The quality of the meal served amazed Ellen, because there had been so little time to prepare. There was an excellent vegetable filled chicken soup with a rich broth, followed by baked fish with au gratin potatoes. For dessert was the huge wedding cake.
Once the meal was over, Ellen talked to various people she’d met, always anchored to Patrick’s side by his arm around her waist. She saw that Wesley and Malinda were standing apart and not even speaking with the same group of people.
It was late afternoon before the guests cleared out, leaving only the two newlywed couples in the big house, along with a small army of servants who were clearing up the mess made by the group. Ellen turned to Patrick. “Would you excuse me for a moment?”
Patrick nodded, though he removed his arm from around her waist with obvious reluctance. She went back to the kitchen and surp
rised Alice with a big hug. “Thank you so much for making everything so perfect. It was so much more than I ever dreamed it could be!”
Alice returned the hug with a grin. “I’m glad you enjoyed everything.”
“I can’t believe you were able to do so much in so little time.” Ellen truly was thrilled with the work the older woman had done.
“I’m just doing my job.”
“You do so much more than your job!” Ellen turned toward the door. “I have to get back, but I needed you to know how much I appreciate everything you did to make today special.”
She walked out to the dining room and saw the other couple was still there. “Do you need some help packing your things, Malinda?” She could see her sister needed to talk, but she wasn’t sure how to get her alone.
Malinda nodded slowly and they went up the stairs to the room she’d used for the past few days. “He’s mad at me,” Malinda said as soon as they’d shut the door behind them.
“I can see that. What happened between you two?”
“He’s mad that I suggested we wait to have our wedding night.” Malinda turned away as she started putting her things into the trunk they’d brought with them from Massachusetts.
“Well, of course, he is! I told you not to do that. What exactly did he say?” Ellen wanted to yell at her sister. What had she been thinking to even bring up the topic?
Malinda shook her head as the tears squeezed out of her eyes. “I’d rather not even say. He was really ugly about it.”
Ellen sighed as she helped gather up Malinda’s clothes and carefully packed them into the trunk. “You need to do what you can to fix the situation as soon as you get to his house.”
Malinda shrugged, but didn’t say anything.
Ellen wanted to shake some sense into her little sister but knew it wouldn’t do any good. Malinda was one of the most headstrong people she’d ever met, and once she’d made up her mind, there was no going back.
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