by Tamie Dearen
“Josh?” she whispered between quickening breaths.
“Hmmm?” he answered, zoning toward her lips.
“We need to talk.”
He grumbled, “Now? Couldn’t we talk later?”
“But it’s about this.”
“This?”
“Yes, this. The physical stuff. We’re getting married in three weeks, but we’re not in love yet. So we probably shouldn’t get too physical before we’re in love.”
“But surely we can kiss a little, right? That’s not too physical, is it?”
“No, I guess not. But I thought it might confuse the issue,” said Charlie
“What exactly is the issue?”
“The issue is how we’re going to know when we really love each other. I believe it can happen, if we both work at it. But you know... It might not happen to both of us at the same time. So how are we going to know?”
His sigh was heavy as he dropped his hand. “We could just tell each other.”
“No, that could make the other person feel pressured to say it if it wasn’t true.”
“Why does it matter so much?”
“Well... I don’t think we should... Even after we’re married... We shouldn’t sleep together until we’re in love.”
His face contorted like he had a splitting headache. “We’ve got three weeks. Don’t you think we can be in love by then? I don’t want to waste a honeymoon.”
“Josh, you can’t make yourself love someone. These things take time... months... years even.”
“Years?” his voice squeaked. “Charlie, I don’t think I can wait years to make love to you.”
“It won’t be making love unless we’re both in love.”
“Charlie... I love you already.”
“Right.” She laughed. “Of course you do, since sex is on the line.”
“No really, I do.”
“Forget it, Josh. I’m not buying it. You were in love with Olivia two weeks ago. You’re not in love with me now.”
“Charlie,” he ground out. “I’ve discovered another of your faults.”
“Oh really? What?”
“You talk too much.”
He crushed his mouth against hers, devouring her with his lips. His hand slipped behind her head and tangled in her hair as he pulled her head toward his. Her right hand rose up to settle on his chest, and she could feel his heart pounding even through his sweater. The crisp cool air and the light earthy smell of his cologne wafted in through her nose as she gasped for air. His mouth moved around, feathering small light kisses around her lips before he slanted his lips across hers, forcefully. Her lips parted as his tongue teased across and moved inside to dance with hers. A warm buzzing sensation vibrated from her neck all the way down to her toes. She was squirming in the seat, unable to sit still under the assault to her senses.
When he moaned, she heard it and felt it in her mouth, which was now on fire with sensations. She moved her lips against his, answering his attack with her own, deepening their kiss. He pulled her lower lip into his mouth and stroked it with his tongue, eliciting a whimper from her throat. She tried to pull herself closer to him, unconsciously reaching with her left arm.
“Ahhh!” she cried.
“What’s wrong?” He pulled away like he’d been burned.
“Aunt Charlie? Are you okay? What happened?” Jace craned to look behind him.
“I’m fine, Jace. I kind of forgot my arm was hurt. But I’m okay.”
“Sorry, baby,” Josh whispered.
“You don’t look sorry.”
“I’m only sorry you got hurt. I’m definitely not sorry I kissed you,” he murmured into her ear, opening his coat and pulling her inside to lean back against his chest. And there she stayed for the rest of the sleigh ride, cozy and comfortable, snuggled inside Josh’s coat under the blanket, soaking in his heat, and wondering how on earth she would know when Josh really loved her. She’d been wrong about the physical attraction—it was obviously still there. But she already knew Josh had slept with women he didn’t love in his past, so physical attraction couldn’t be the gauge of love for their relationship.
As the sleigh rounded back to the house and its next awaiting passengers, Josh leaned in close and spoke, his voice so soft she had to strain her ears to hear. “I really do love you, Charlie.”
Charlie twisted her head to look into his eyes. “I know you think you do, Josh. But you don’t.”
His brows scrunched over his eyes. “What do you mean?”
Brad’s voice, calling from below, interrupted before she could answer. “Hey, lovebirds! It’s our turn!”
“Can I drive again?” asked Jace.
When Randy didn’t object, Josh said, “Sure. I think Brad and Grace need a chaperone, too.”
“What’s a chaperone?” asked Jace.
“A special guard who makes sure nothing happens,” Josh said, with a wry smile. “You’re really good at it.”
Jace replied, “Cool!”
Josh didn’t get another chance to talk to Charlie alone, during the entire marshmallow-roasting-s’mores-making time following the sleigh-riding time. Frustrated didn’t even begin to describe how he felt.
“So Josh,” Collin jibed. “Why isn’t your fiancée wearing a ring, anyway? Are you ashamed to claim her? Or is she ashamed to claim you?”
“I’ve been too busy making sure she was still alive to take care of those other details.”
“Hmmm, she looks alive and well to me.” Collin made a point of giving Charlie the once-over. “I don’t think that’s the problem at all. No indeed. I overheard a rather interesting tidbit a minute ago... Something about you not being able to choose between Charlie and Olivia.”
“That’s not true. Who said that?”
“Never you mind. I don’t want to get anyone in trouble with you. I hear you have a terrible temper.”
“I could give you a demonstration if you’d like.”
“Don’t get your dander up. After all, I haven’t done anything. I’m only reporting what I heard. Am I to blame if your friends and family are telling tales?”
“Yes, because my friends and family would never say that. So I think you’re telling the tales.”
“No, no, no. It didn’t come from me—I could never make up something that good. And you know if Charlie hears you’re having a hard time making up your mind, she might decide she doesn’t even want the ring when you finally get her one.”
“I’m not having a hard time making up my mind. I’m marrying Charlie.”
“But I heard you were engaged to Olivia before the accident. Is it true?”
“No, we were never actually engaged.”
“But you bought her a ring?”
“Yes, but she didn’t take it, so...”
“So you proposed to Olivia, but she turned you down? And now you’re trying to marry Charlie?”
“No, it’s not like that at all.”
“Okay. You tell me what happened.”
“I... We... It’s none of your business.”
Collin’s laughter trailed behind him as he left him alone to fume.
“EVERYTHING SEEMS TO be going well,” Olivia remarked to Emily. “Surely after this, Charlie will realize Josh is head over heels in love with her.”
“I hope so.” Emily had her doubts.
“Did you send Brad suggestions for the engagement ring?”
“Yes, but I’m actually having to guess. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her gush over a single engagement ring. She’s really particular. There’s always something about every setting that’s not quite right.”
“Maybe he needs to take her shopping for her own ring,” suggested Olivia.
“You could be right,” said Emily. “She hardly wears any jewelry, so it’s hard to guess her taste.”
“I love the necklace she’s wearing,” said Olivia.
“I know. Can you believe it? Josh picked it out for her all by himself.”
“Rea
lly? Maybe there’s hope for him after all.”
STEVEN SPOKE PRIVATELY to Josh. “Okay, Josh. I gave you my blessing, but you know I still have reservations. I’ve got to know you’re putting the health of your marriage ahead of the adoption. I’m still concerned you’re rushing into this marriage before you have your relationship straightened out.”
“No. Everything’s under control.” Josh felt guilty for the lie, but he intended to make his statement true before the wedding.
“I’m sorry about Collin. His father’s been a constant thorn in my side since we were children.”
“Yeah. I saw him flirting with Anne, earlier.”
“Nothing slows him down. Not even marriage and twins.”
“I’m surprised you tolerate him as well as you do.”
“Only because of Gram,” Gherring muttered. “Otherwise, I might have killed him on several occasions. But he’s careful never to be far away from her protection.”
“His sons seem to be exactly like him.”
“I agree. Those rotten apples haven’t fallen far from his tree.” Steven cast a disparaging look toward David and Collin who were busy regaling Grace’s sisters with stories about their escapades in Europe. “And I have more bad news. I’m afraid my cousins will be attending our New Year’s Eve celebration, as well.”
“Are you kidding me? I thought they said something about having a party or tickets or something.”
“As it turns out, they only knew they had an invitation to a private party. They didn’t realize the party Gram mentioned was the Gherring Inc. New Year’s Eve Bash.”
“I can tell you one thing for sure. Charlie’s going to have a ring on her finger before we go to that party.”
“Probably a wise move.”
“ARE YOU FEELING OKAY,” Anne asked Charlie. “I don’t want you to overdo it and tear something.”
“No, Mom. I’m fine. With two doctors and two nurses watching my every move, I could hardly get away with overdoing it.”
“Okay. Just checking. You look kind of flushed.”
“Did Ellis and Micah like the sleigh ride?”
“Yes, except they cried when it was over, even though we took them twice and their faces were bright red from the cold. And Micah got mad because we wouldn’t let him ride on the horse.”
“There you are, Charlie,” said Gram as she joined them. “I’ve been wanting to talk to you about the wedding.”
“You know we’re planning a really small, informal ceremony. Probably not many more people than are here right now.”
“Yes, I know what you said, but Gus and I would like to have it here, and throw a slightly bigger bash. It’ll be a wedding present.”
Charlie’s skepticism must have shown on her face because Gram said, “You won’t have to do anything to prepare, you won’t have to lift a finger. I’ll take care of everything.”
“I don’t know, Gram. I wasn’t even planning to buy a wedding dress or anything.”
Gram’s eyebrows lifted. “And why not?”
Charlie hesitated. Should she tell the truth? That she felt uncomfortable having a real wedding when they weren’t going to have a real marriage? That she couldn’t imagine walking down the aisle in a long white gown when her groom wasn’t in love with her?
“Honestly, Gram. There’s not enough time. But I’ll find something pretty to wear. And if there’s only about twenty people here, it really won’t matter anyway.”
“Exactly what I suspected,” said Gram. “So are you honestly going to tell me you never dreamed of your wedding day and imagined yourself in a beautiful white wedding gown?”
“Of course I did, Gram. But I was a little girl. Now I know those things aren’t important.”
“Emily and I both offered our dresses,” said Anne. “She turned us down.”
“Charlie. I’d like to say I hate to be pushy. But it isn’t true. I’m pushy, and I like it that way. I’ve already made arrangements for you to meet with the dressmaker who designed your mother’s dress.”
“But there’s only three weeks,” Charlie objected.
“She made your mother’s dress in less than a week,” said Gram. “And you’ll thank me someday when you look back at your pictures.”
“I’m grateful, Gram,” said Charlie. “But I wanted things to be small and simple.”
“Small and simple,” Gram said, nodding her head. “I’ll be sure to keep that in mind. Would you prefer a harpist or a string quartet?”
“I wasn’t planning to have music,” said Charlie.
“Okay, fine,” said Gram. “I’ll plan the music for you. Did you have a preference about the dinner menu?”
“Dinner menu?”
“We could do finger foods if you prefer, rather than a sit-down dinner.”
“Yes, please. I don’t want a sit-down dinner. Couldn’t we just have punch and cake?”
“Ah, the cake—I’m glad you reminded me. Have you picked out a cake already?”
“No Gram. I—”
“Good, because I saw one in the December edition of Modern Bride magazine. It was absolutely spectacular.”
“You were looking at a bridal magazine?” asked Charlie.
“I have several subscriptions. It pays to be prepared.”
“Mom, can’t you do something?”
“I’m sorry, Charlotte. She’s a force of nature.”
COLLIN WAVED CHARLIE over to the group that included David and the three youngest Marshall sisters. She wandered reluctantly that direction.
“Come on, Charlie. Give us your opinion,” said Collin. “Who do you think is the hottest male actor right now? We have two votes for Barry McClain and two for Forest Derringer. But I maintain Caspian Neveau edges both of them out.”
Charlie stuck out her tongue. “Yuck! None of the above. Those boys are all too pretty. I could never be interested in a guy who couldn’t beat me in a rock-climbing contest.”
“I take it Josh fits that description,” said Collin.
“He’s one of very few who have that distinction.”
“If that’s all it takes, I’d certainly like the opportunity to best you.”
“You’re a rock-climber?” Charlie asked, cocking her head sideways to inspect his form. He did have a broad back, and he might be hiding some muscles under his sweater
“I’ve done a bit of climbing.”
“Outdoors or in a gym?”
“Both,” he declared, with a firm nod.
“Well unfortunately, I can’t climb for quite a while until I’m healed up. So I guess we’ll never know whether you could have beaten me or not.”
“I think it’s only fair you postpone this wedding until after we have a chance to compete. You could be marrying the wrong man.”
“I don’t think so. I’m happy with my choice.”
“But he might change his mind again,” Collin said. “I understand he was hot for Olivia before he settled on you.”
“That’s not what happened,” Olivia protested. “He was in love with Charlie from the beginning, but he didn’t think he had a chance with her.”
“Personally, I don’t think he’s worthy of either of you lovely ladies. But that doesn’t excuse his indecisiveness. How can you marry someone that fickle? He might change his mind at any moment. It could be the shortest marriage in history.”
Charlie schooled her face to hide her emotional turmoil. She couldn’t let Collin know how close he was to treading on her insecurities. “Josh isn’t that kind of man. But something tells me a girl might expect that from you.”
“Never.” Collin’s grin was broad. “Because no woman will ever get me to the alter of sacrifice.”
“Like I said, I’m happy with my choice.”
“Did I say no woman? I meant no woman but you. Only for you, Charlie, would I give up my wandering ways.”
“Pardon me if I don’t buy your sincerity.”
“Fine then—marry the guy. And when he shows his indecisive streak
and leaves you at home alone, give me a call.” With his words, Collin slipped a business card into her hand.
Charlie, still stunned at his blatant offer, dropped the card on the floor as if it were coated in acid. Collin chuckled as he picked it up and slipped it into her arm sling when she looked away.
JOSH SEETHED, WATCHING Collin flirting with Charlie from the corner of his eye.
“Josh, are you listening to me?” Gram demanded.
“I’m sorry.” Josh forced his attention back to the tiny white-haired woman. “I was distracted.”
“Because Collin is pursuing Charlie?”
“Uhmm... well, yes...”
“And do you think Collin has any chance of winning this competition?”
“No. I mean... I don’t think so. But I don’t know what he’s saying...”
“The best defense is a good offense. Isn’t that what they say?”
“Yes, but...”
“Where are your weaknesses, Josh? Time to shore ‘em up. Close the lines. Batten up the hatches. Go in with guns blazing.”
“What are you talking about, Gram?”
“Are all men so clueless?” She put her fingers in her mouth and let out a wolf whistle. “Excuse me.” Her voice was prim and proper. “I would appreciate it if Charlie would join me for a moment.”
Charlie moved toward Gram and Josh, eyeing them with caution, as everyone returned to their conversations, chuckling at Gram’s antics.
“Yes, ma’am? You wanted me?”
“Yes, dear. I wanted to show both of you something over here by the fireplace.”
Josh followed behind them, trying to ascertain Gram’s motives. “Here we are. Now what do you see?” asked Gram.
“The stockings?” guessed Charlie.
“Look higher,” Gram suggested. “Much higher.”
Josh grinned. “I see it... mistletoe!” Two rosy patches appeared on Charlie’s cheeks. “We can’t disappoint, Gram,” he said.
“I love it when a plan comes together,” Gram murmured as she departed.
Charlie stood trembling like a skittish doe. Trying not to spook her with a sudden movement, he cupped her face gently between his hands. He could feel her pulse throbbing a wild rock-beat in her neck.
