by Marie Savage
I’m still confused about why it was such a big secret that she moved here. Why didn’t Mike just say so? It’s obviously a good sign that she moved here. It means she wants us to work things out. That’s the only thing it can be.
I follow her down the winding countryside road just outside of Kerrville. I used to love driving out here when I was younger and remember the roads well. When we finally pull up into her driveway, I immediately fall in love with her place. It is a beautiful country home, just like her and I talked about getting one day, when we were discussing our future. She did it, she bought a home like we discussed, and she bought it in my hometown. This has to be a positive sign.
I park beside her and get Dustin out of his car seat before joining her on the front porch. “This is a nice place, Julie.”
“Thank you. It sits on ten acres, with the woods and a small pond in the back.”
I’m amazed. She remembered how I wanted that too. I hear whining coming from the other side of the door. Bo knows right away it’s me.
“He’s missed you terribly. Be careful, he might charge you.”
“It’s okay, I’ve got it. I’ve missed him too. Go ahead and let him out.”
Julie opens the door and Bo runs out and greets me. He is whining and wagging his tail.
“Hey, boy, how are you? Did you miss me?” I say, sitting down on the step with Dustin on my lap, as I pet him. I notice Julie walk inside to give Bo and me time to bond again.
“Doggie.” Dustin tries to pet him, but Bo gives him kisses and Dustin hides his face in my shirt.
“This is Bo. He won’t hurt ya.”
After giving Bo his much-needed attention, I pick up Dustin and join Julie inside to look at the house.
“Here it is, home sweet home,” she announces, walking back into the living room.
“Looks like you’re all moved in,” I respond before sitting Dustin down on the couch. Bo immediately joins him on the couch. I shoot a disapproving look at Julie.
“I know what you’re going to say, but in all fairness, it has been a tough time for him with the move and you not being around,” she adds before stopping. “I know he shouldn’t be on the couch, but it’s an old couch. When I get a new one, then I will make him stay off,” she says, finishing her little speech.
I smile at her, letting her know I’m not really upset. Besides, it’s her place and I don’t really have a say.
“I know the look of the house is very outdated, but I have so many plans for what I want to do with it,” she says as she walks around the room.
I watch her as I take in the place. This is Julie; everything in this room is her. I look at the fireplace mantel and notice that our picture from Christmas sits proudly up there, along with pictures of her family. She didn’t hide it or throw it away. I’m still with her, and the feelings washing over me that she still wants me, has me dying to sweep her up and make her mine once again.
But I can’t rush this. We need to take things slow. I don’t want to fuck this up again. “Why don’t you show me what you want done first? That way, I can call Bobby and get an estimate for you,” I tell her, hoping that if I can stay focused on work, I will keep my mind occupied.
“Sure, the room is right here.”
I follow her down the hallway and to the room. “It’s a guest room, then? You sure you want to start here first?”
“Yes, I thought it might be the easiest,” she adds.
“I guess you’re right. It wouldn’t take but a few hours to do.”
“Can you start today?” she asks.
“I guess I could. I would have to run back to town and get the paint you want and my supplies, and of course, drop Dustin off at a babysitter. That is, if I can find someone to watch him.”
“What about Renee?” she asks. “I’m sorry, that’s none of my business,” she adds.
“No, it’s okay. Normally, I would make her watch him, but she’s indisposed right now.”
“Indisposed?” Julie asks.
“Hungover,” I clarify.
“Oh.”
“Yeah, I just don’t want Dustin around her today. It will be okay. I’m sure my neighbor wouldn’t mind watching him.”
“He can just stay here. I will watch over him while you work,” she volunteers.
“You don’t have to do that,” I tell her.
“I would really like too. That way he is near you, and you don’t have to worry about him.”
“Are you sure? I don’t want to impose.”
“You’re not imposing. I would love to watch him. Just go and get the paint and supplies and his things. I will fix us all a nice lunch. You can start after that.”
“Okay, well let me go get our stuff and get started.”
Julie
While Ben takes Dustin with him to grab the paint and other supplies he needs, as well as some things for Dustin, I straighten up the place and fix some lunch for all of us. I don’t change out of the baggy overalls, since it helps hide my baby bump better than my normal outfits. I’m slowly finding the courage to tell him. He seems so happy to see me. Will he still feel that way once I tell him the news?
The three of us enjoy a nice kid friendly lunch of homemade macaroni and cheese. Ben then heads to the room to start painting, while I watch Dustin.
He is better around me now and not shying away so much. He is a normal two-year-old and is inquisitive about everything. He seems to love the fact that I will sit with him and play cars or whatever he wants. Finally, he is done with toys and chills out on the couch to watch cartoons, with a pillow and blanket and Bo right there at his feet. When I look over again, they are both fast asleep.
I quietly get up and decide to bring Ben some coffee. “Hey, it’s looking good in here,” I say, stepping into the room.
“Be careful, wet paint everywhere,” he says as he steps off the ladder and walks over to me. “You read my mind, thanks,” he says, taking the cup from me.
“You’re welcome.”
“Where’s your cup?” he asks, knowing my coffee addiction.
“Oh, I cut back. I was drinking too much of it. It’s not healthy.”
“Yeah, I know what you mean. Lately I have been drinking way too much trying to stay awake.”
“Is there anything I can do to help?”
“Where’s Dustin?”
“He fell asleep on the couch. He’s fine. We played for awhile and then he wanted cartoons. Next thing I knew, he was out.”
“Thank you for watching him. He likes you.”
“He just met me. How do you know if he likes me?”
“I know because he’s like his daddy.” Ben smiles, giving me a wink. “If you want to help, you can paint the trim in the doorway,” he says, handing me a brush.
“You think he’s okay?” I ask him
“I’ll go check on him.” Ben touches my shoulder as he steps past me. His touch—God, how I’ve missed his touch. I start painting when Ben returns.
“He’s still fast asleep. He’ll be out for a little bit. So, I’m curious about something,” he says to me as he climbs the ladder and continues to paint.
“What’s that?” I ask him, while concentrating on the trim.
“How come you dropped out of school?”
I smile, knowing he would eventually ask. He begged me to go to school and wouldn’t let me join him in January when he left to visit Dustin. He didn’t want me dropping out. “I just wasn’t enjoying it as much as I thought I would,” I lie. The truth is, I missed him terribly.
“What do you want to do now?”
“I’m not sure. Right now, I’m just concentrating on the house. What about you?” I ask, turning the tables on him.
“What about me?” He chuckles.
“What about police academy?” I ask.
“Oh, that, well, I guess it wasn’t in the cards.”
“Why not?” I ask, looking at him.
“You know, I need the money to help with Dustin. Besides, it’
s hard to work all the time, be a dad, and find time to go to the academy. I did think about joining the Texas Game Wardens, though.”
“You did?”
“Yeah, but I’m still not sure.”
“I think that you should, you would be great.”
“Well, I don’t think it’s a good time to leave Dustin right now.”
“You don’t trust Renee, do you?” I ask him point-blank.
He stops and stares at me. “No, I don’t trust her. I never will.”
“I still don’t think you should give up on your dreams. If you want to be a game warden, you should go for it,” I add.
Ben steps down from the ladder and approaches me. “You do realize that it is still police work? Last time I checked, you weren’t really crazy about the idea of me being a cop.”
“I know, but if it’s something you love, then you should go for it.”
“Let me get this straight. What you’re saying is, if I love something, I should go for it?” He stands in front of me, taking the brush from my hand and placing it in the pan.
He looks at me again, staring deeply into my eyes. I’ve seen this look before, and I’ve missed it terribly.
“What’s the matter, kitten, cat got your tongue?” he asks as our faces come closer.
He places his hand on my waist and slowly pulls me closer. A hunger inside me starts to build. The moment I’ve dreamed of is suddenly about to happen.
“You haven’t answered me. Do you still think I should go for it?” he whispers, his hot breath near my lips. If either of us move just a fraction of an inch, our lips will touch. Pleasure and torture colliding.
“Absolutely,” I whisper, barely getting the words out before his lips touch mine. He slowly takes my lips as I wrap my arms around his neck. His sweet seductive kiss is calling to all the parts of my body that belong only to him. I’m his—then, now, and always.
He pulls back, breaking our embrace. I want to protest and pull him back to me, but the sounds of Dustin calling for his daddy stop us both.
“I’ll keep that in mind.” He smiles again and gives me a wink before heading to the living room to check on Dustin.
Chapter 10
Julie
I once again sit with Dustin while Ben finishes the room. Our sweet passionate moment may be over for now, but the memory of it will last for a lifetime. We are one step closer to being together and I couldn’t be happier. Thoughts run through my mind again. Should I tell him now? If I tell him, will he be angry? How do I go from please kiss me again, to by the way, I’m carrying your babies? Did he feel my belly when we kissed?
“Julie, I need to talk to you,” Ben announces as he walks into the living room, startling me out of my thoughts.
I quickly jump up to face the music. He knows my secret. Please don’t let him be angry with me, I pray to myself.
“You okay? I didn’t mean to startle you.” He laughs as he gives me a funny look.
“I’m fine. What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. I think the room is finished. I can finish up next weekend and double check if I missed anywhere, if you like.”
“That sounds great,” I chime.
“But I think I should look at your kitchen sink before I do anything else. You got quite a leak going on.”
“Thank you, that would be great.”
He smiles at me. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Yes, of course.” Oh crap, here it comes.
“Would you like to go out on a date with me tonight? Dinner and a movie, just the two of us?”
I stare at him in awe. A date? He just asked me on a date?
“Or not?” Ben says as his smile fades.
“No, I would love to.” I smile back at him.
“Are you sure? We could do it another time if tonight’s no good.”
“Tonight’s perfect,” I reiterate.
“Great. Let me go and grab a shower and change. Renee can watch Dustin. I will pick you up around eight o’clock?”
“I’ll be ready.”
He grabs his things and heads to his truck while I gather Dustin’s things for him. Tonight will be perfect. I can finally tell him. We’re finally getting back together.
I stand by the truck, waiting for Ben to securely put Dustin in his car seat. I’m so thankful he is getting this experience. He is going to need it. Not to mention, we will need a larger vehicle one day.
“All set, buddy,” he says before turning to face me. “I will see you tonight?”
“Eight o’clock, I’ll be ready.”
He hesitates before climbing into his truck and I am hoping it is because he wants to kiss me again as we stand so close together.
“You have a little paint on your nose.” He winks, touching my nose, before giving me a sweet peck on it and getting into his truck.
Ben
I’m driving back and realize that I was so excited to ask Julie out, that I forgot one important detail—I’m broke. No way, can I afford a nice restaurant. I barely have enough for a Big Mac. I can’t cancel out on her; this is a turning point. Things are going well and I don’t want to fuck this up.
There’s only one solution and I know what it is—pawn my guitar. It is the one thing that I hoped I would never have to do, especially after all the trouble Julie went through to get it back for me, but if it will help me get her back, it’s worth the sacrifice.
Julie
Pulling out another dress, I have no idea what to wear. My clothes are beginning to be too snug and it’s warmer now, so bulky clothes would look weird, especially on a date. I decide on a nice sundress that will hide the baby bump. It’s warm enough to pull it off since spring is almost here. Besides, I’m telling him my secret tonight, anyway.
It is hard to believe, but this will only be our second date. First one, if you count the fact that we are no longer a couple. Will that change after tonight? I hope so. I’m still unsure about the whole Renee living with him thing. It sounds like she is not through with game playing and is now using Dustin to her advantage to get to Ben.
Ben
“Where do you think you’re going?” Renee asks me when she notices I’m a little more dressed up than usual.
“Not that it’s any of your business, but I’m meeting with some guys from work. We’re going to dinner and then probably to the bar,” I lie to her. If she knows I’m going out with Julie, she will do something to fuck it up.
“You have money? I thought you said you were broke,” she says.
“The guys are buying,” I lie again.
“You’re going to pick up women? You and these guys from work?”
“What if I am? I am single,” I jab at her as I check on Dustin. I made sure he was well fed before I started to get ready.
“Well, don’t think for one second that you are going to bring some bar floozy back to our apartment,” she announces, acting like the lady of the house. She is so delusional. I should just walk away and ignore her, but I’m still pissed that she was too hungover this morning from her own partying to watch our son.
“Okay, first of all, it’s my apartment. Second of all, bringing a person you only met a few hours ago home, is something you would do, not me. Finally, you have no say, whatsoever, in my affairs. We’re not married, Renee, remember?” My little speech shuts her up quickly and the surprised look on her face is priceless.
“Maybe I could go too. I’m always cooped up with Dustin. I’m sure I could find a babysitter. Mrs. Wooten will watch him, she loves watching him.”
“No, you already dump him off at her house every chance you get, to do God knows what. You need to stay home with your son.”
“It’s not fair. Why do you get to go out?”
“Look, I don’t have time for your shit right now. I’ll be home later tonight, and I better find my son safely snug in his bed.”
“Don’t threaten me. Like you always remind me, we’re not married anymore, and I can do what I want.”
I
glare at her and leave the apartment. She is looking for a fight but I refuse to give her one tonight. She is not going to mess this up for Julie and me.
I make a quick stop at the drugstore and pick up a bouquet of flowers. I don’t get roses, feeling ashamed for throwing her Valentine’s Day roses at her door weeks ago. I decide on a colorful spring mix—it suits her. She is looking so pretty, yet different from when I first met her—more mature. With her hair styled differently now, it flatters her face, and no longer hides it. Her cheeks are pinker, and she is practically glowing. After I kissed her earlier today, I realized I needed to slow down. I decide that this go-around, I will take things slow. I will court her like I would have liked to have done the moment I first met her. I’m not sure why she decided to move here, but I’m so glad she did. Maybe we have a real chance to make this happen.
Chapter 11
Julie
“I’m going to tell him tonight,” I say to myself in the mirror as Bo sits beside me while I get ready for my date. I look down at Bo, and he is giving me that look he gives me when he isn’t really convinced I’m telling the truth. He gives me the same look when I tell him we are going to the park but end up heading to the veterinarian’s office.
“I swear, I’m going to tell him,” I say once more. “I will tell him after dinner tonight,” I say one last time before putting on my lipstick. Taking a step back from the mirror, I turn to see if the dress does a good job of covering my baby belly. I think it will work as long as we don’t get too close, otherwise, he will feel that there’s a little more to me now.
Bo leaves me and starts barking at the door, alerting me that Ben is here. Eight o’clock, on the dot, that’s my Marine. I can barely contain the excitement that this is really happening—we are on our way to being back together. We are finally going to be a family.
