Chapter 11: Never fear, Cowboy Samurai Jake is here!
[Mr. Suit VS Nix Duo] Fight!
“Evolution One.” Both swordsmen cried and their living-metal swords glowed with a green-tinged light and transformed. Nix Duo’s sword, like Mr. Suit’s transformed into a claw. They charged each other and their swords clashed-
They leapt back from each other and raised their swords to command, “Evolution Two!” Both swords glowed and Ōkami’s holographic image appeared next to Mr. Suit while the holographic image of a tengu yokai (crow demon) materialized next to Nix Duo.
“Karasu-Tengu.” Mr. Suit murmured the name of Nix Duo’s living-metal sword. According to Mr. Suit’s Intel, it was a living-metal sword that had the ability to send painful electric shocks into its opponent. The tengu demon was a crow-like human sized creature that was standing on its clawed feet and dressed in the robes of a Buddhist Monk. It had glossy black feathers, a sharp looking beak and glowing red eyes.
Mr. Suit and Nix Duo transformed their swords back into their katana forms and charged each other and engaged once again. They danced around each other exchanging blocks and blows with grace and skill. Mr. Suit had to admit that Nix Duo had gotten faster, but through training like Mr. Suit had or by using illegal Accelerator Tech, he didn’t know for sure. Nix Duo had actually become a challenge.
They leapt backwards again to put some distance between themselves before they held their swords up before them: “Evolution Three!” Both Mr. Suit and Nix Duo’s swords transformed until tiny metal tubes sprouted on the swords’ metal surfaces - air ducts that began sucking in oxygen and transforming it into plasma energy to be able to attack with. An aura of green plasma began to swirl around both of the living-metal swordsman and their swords.
Mr. Suit swung his sword forward releasing a gigantic plasma energy attack. “Ōkami Plasma Energy Attack!” The energy attack transformed in midair to resemble an attacking wolf.
Nix Duo swung his sword through the air and unleashed his own plasma attack that transformed into a crow in flight. “Karasu-Tengu Plasma Energy Attack!”
The Plasma Wolf leapt into the air at Nix Duo while the Plasma Karasu-Tengu flew towards Mr. Suit - the attacks clashed in midair and fought each other for dominance.
However, Mr. Suit had used up a lot of energy in his fight against the Metalheads and was already having trouble keeping up with Nix Duo, when Lunae latched onto Nix Duo’s arm, and gave Mr. Suit an angelic smile. Mr. Suit realized that if he continued with his attack Lunae would be hurt. Mr. Suit hesitated and his energy that was already wavering began to falter entirely. This was all Nix Duo needed to increase the power of his attack and simply cut through Mr. Suit’s attack as he ran forward towards the now unprotected Samurai Superhero.
Mr. Suit barely managed to block the downward slash of Nix Duo’s sword, which suddenly moved like a snake and coiled around Mr. Suit’s own sword.
A wide, psychotic smile formed on the faceless mask. “Gotcha.” Nix Duo said before he sent thousands of volts of electricity coursing through Mr. Suit’s body.
“Ack!” Mr. Suit stumbled backwards in pain, his body enveloped by crackling silver energy.
Nix Duo took advantage of Mr. Suit’s stunned state and swung his sword down in a deadly arc, slicing through Mr. Suit’s smart-suit and cutting deeply into his chest. Only a living-metal sword could cut through Mr. Suit’s smart-suit that in other situations acted as protective armor.
SPLURRTT! Mr. Suit’s blood spurted through the air and he fell backwards, losing consciousness.
“Mr. Suit!” Jake yelled out in horror as he watched the Samurai Superhero being cut down in front of him.
Ultraviolet, with a white cloth bandage now wrapped around her arm, suddenly arrived upon the scene. She entered the room through the hole in the wall and took her tonfa down from her back. “Mr. Suit!” she cried as she caught sight of the fallen Samurai Superhero. Nix Duo was approaching Mr. Suit - a psychotic holographic grin on his mask - he raised his sword, prepared to stab Mr. Suit through the gut to finish him off. “NOOO! Get away from him, you shitty bastard!” Ultraviolet charged Nix Duo and leapt up into the air at him and as she descended brought her tonfa down upon Nix Duo.
Nix Duo used his living-metal sword to block Ultraviolet’s tonfa. Nix Duo smiled up at Ultraviolet beneath his mask. “A Battle Android…how quaint…acting like you care about that Samurai Superhero and acting as though you have feelings…pretty little android…” He purred his last words.
“I do care about Mr. Suit!” Ultraviolet shouted in Nix Duo’s face. “And I do have feelings, you shitty bastard!” Ultraviolet spit in his direction.
Nix Duo gave Ultraviolet a quizzical look. “I think you’re forgetting something, my dear - you’re an android. A robot, an A.I. unit, and you know electricity can be extremely dangerous to an android…you may just blow up if exposed to too much at once.” His malicious holographic grin was still on the faceless mask widening even more.
Ultraviolet furrowed her brow at Nix Duo. “What?”
However, Nix Duo’s sword suddenly wrapped around Ultraviolet’s tonfa so that she could not escape and then through his psy-link he caused thousands of volts of electricity to shoot through Ultraviolet’s body. Ultraviolet screamed - eerily like a real person would - before she fell to the floor in a twitching and sparking heap.
Jake was wide-eyed in his fear. “Mr. Suit…Ultraviolet…” He sunk to his knees in despair. “It’s over…” There’s nothing I can do…there’s no one here that can save us…
Nix Duo looked down at the sparking android and frowned to himself. He then turned his attention back to Mr. Suit. He walked over to the unconscious Samurai Superhero before grabbing Mr. Suit’s ankle and dragging the samurai over to the center of the room. Nix Duo then walked over to a sort of control panel and pressed a button on it. This caused a circular part of the floor in the center of the room to glow with artificial light before the floor opened up and a large wooden cross emerged, rising upwards.
Jake gulped at the sight of that cross. He had a bad feeling about this but was frozen in his terror and couldn’t move. Nix Duo walked back over to the fallen Mr. Suit, picked him up and slammed him against the wooden cross. Nix Duo then placed his sword against Mr. Suit’s smart-suit and sent thousands of volts of electricity into the smart-suit specifically. Jake watched as the smart-suit began to spark and suddenly the strangest thing happened. The suit began to remove itself from Mr. Suit as if it were a living thing, appearing like liquid metal.
The smart-suit completely removed itself from Mr. Suit, sliding down his body to puddle on the floor, leaving him clad in only his boxers before the smart-suit returned to its original state, which was a silver ball about the size of a soccer ball. A holographic frowning face appeared on the metal ball and it was still sparking.
Jake realized that Nix Duo had somehow managed to short circuit Mr. Suit’s smart-suit and that now he was completely vulnerable before the sadistic cyborg. Jake also couldn’t help but notice Mr. Suit’s red and blue Nintendo boxers that had a picture of Mario on them, a plus sign, a mushroom, and an equal sign that pointed to a larger version of Mario a.k.a Super Mario. The phrase ‘Bigger is better’ was also on the shorts. Jake knew that Mr. Suit would probably die of embarrassment if he knew everyone was now looking at his geeky…or perhaps ‘geek chic’ boxers.
Zero Two looked at Mr. Suit’s boxers and sneered before he held his hand up. Jake watched as a gigantic metal spike began to emerge from out of the palm of the cyborg’s hand with a sinister whirling sound. Nix Duo held the spike up to Mr. Suit’s shoulder before he suddenly let the spike staple Mr. Suit’s shoulder to the wooden cross.
Due to the excruciating pain, Mr. Suit suddenly regained consciousness and began to scream. Nix Duo paid him no heed however and didn’t hesitate to secure Mr. Suit’s other shoulder next. He then drove metal spikes into Mr. Suit’s thighs and his forearms to keep him completely
pinned to the wooden cross. A total of six metal stakes had been used to crucify Mr. Suit.
Jake covered his ears but even that couldn’t block out the sound of Mr. Suit’s ragged screams. Jake shut his eyes and wished it would stop. Why wouldn’t Nix Duo just stop and leave Mr. Suit alone? Hadn’t he made Mr. Suit suffer enough? Jake was trembling and absolutely terrified. Would Nix Duo torture him, next? Just the thought made Jake nearly piss in his pants.
Nix Duo’s holographic psychotic grin was back as he looked at Mr. Suit and licked his lips beneath the mask. “Mmmm.” Nix Duo made a groan of pleasure and Jake wondered if causing pain turned the sick fuck on. “You have a delicious scream, Mr. Suit. I want you to scream for me even more before I break you and then finally kill you, nice and slow.”
Mr. Suit was panting for breath, pale, and sweaty, but he gathered his strength to look up and spit on Nix Duo’s mask. “Fuck you! I won’t let you hear my screams again, you sick bastard!”
“Hmm.” Nix Duo hummed as he walked over to the control panel and pressed another button on it. Another section of the floor glowed before a table with sharp medical instruments on it emerged from the floor, rising up on a sort of platform. “We’ll see about that, Mr. Suit. What was that you said earlier? About scum like me not having rights?” Nix Duo stabbed Mr. Suit in the stomach with a twisted piece of metal and began to prod and dig at Mr. Suit’s wound.
However, Mr. Suit bit down on his lower lip so that he would not cry out. Jake watched, feeling bewildered as blood trickled down Mr. Suit’s chin. He said he wouldn’t scream and then he doesn’t. He has such a strong will. I on the other hand am a cowardly, spineless wimp. Why doesn’t he just give up? Ask for mercy? Why is he still trying to be strong? Fighting for what he believes in. Fighting as a chivalrous Samurai Superhero until the very end…Mr. Suit…
A cool guy like that…would never want to be friends with a coward like me who watches and does nothing as someone’s being tortured. With those thoughts in mind, Jake somehow managed to stand on wobbly legs and began to make his way over to Nix Duo and Mr. Suit, sword in hand, that was also trembling. “S-s-stop!” Jake managed to shout.
Nix Duo turned to face Jake curiously and looked amused as he took in Jake’s trembling legs and trembling hands. His knees were knocking together Jake was so scared. “You’re frightened out of your mind right now aren’t you, cowboy samurai?”
“Hell yea…” Jake admitted as he swallowed. His throat felt dry.
Nix Duo tilted his head thoughtfully at Jake. “And yet…you still seek to save your partner. That’s very admirable of you…brave even…”
Jake shook his head. “I wouldn’t call it ‘brave’ - I would call it stupid. I know I can’t win against you.”
Nix Duo sauntered up to Jake and flung his arm around Jake’s shoulders amiably, “Or perhaps it’s smart.” Nix Duo chuckled. “I like you, Jake Lonestar. You know you can’t win against me and yet here you are. I owe you one, you know. You saved my gang from that semi-trailer truck and so, guess what? I’ll let you off the hook just this once…I won’t kill you.” A wide holographic grin formed on the faceless mask and Nix Duo paused expectantly as he awaited Jake’s response.
Jake was too shocked to respond however, and so Nix Duo simply released him sauntering back to his metal throne. Nix Duo sat down comfortably and held out the palm of his hand. Jake watched as a metal wine cup emerged from the palm of Nix Duo’s hand, which he held out to his side as if expecting someone to fill it. Lunae immediately appeared with a bottle of red wine at his side and filled the metal cup for Nix Duo, placing a straw in it. Nix Duo swirled the wine thoughtfully, but didn’t try to drink it. “Tell you what, Jake, I’ll even offer you a deal. I want the SSF to participate in this year’s E.T. Tech Race. If you win, Jake, I’ll spare Mr. Suit’s life. If you lose then, well, Mr. Suit’s life is mine. Do you accept this challenge, cowboy samurai?”
Legs still trembling, knees still knocking together, a fierce look came to Jake’s eyes. “Hell yea! You’re on Nix Duo! I’ll win this race!” Maybe..epp! Someone please help meeee!
Nix Duo nodded. “Then it’s settled. Now go before I change my mind and decide to kill you.” Nix Duo waved Jake away with his hand in a dismissing gesture before a tiny hole opened up on his faceless mask and he began to drink his wine with the straw.
Jake swallowed and nodding vigorously began to stumble his way out of the room. He was just about to climb out of the hole in the wall when he realized he had forgotten Ultraviolet.
“Don’t forget to take that piece of scrap metal with you,” Nix Duo drawled as he looked at the fallen android pensively.
Jake felt angry at Nix Duo’s words for some reason as he walked back over to the fallen Ultraviolet. Jake took out a pair of leather gloves and began to put them on. “She’s not a piece of scrap metal.” Jake found himself defending Ultraviolet and wondered if Nix Duo would kill him for his insolent remark. Jake carefully picked Ultraviolet up into his arms bridal-style and with such care that Nix Duo and the other cyborgs that were present began to snicker at Jake’s strange actions. She was just an android after all. But to Jake this was simply a necessary precaution. Dr. Valery had warned Jake not to touch Ultraviolet with his bare hands because it could have unforeseen results similar to when Jake touched other electrical appliances. His mere touch could theoretically destroy Ultraviolet.
Nix Duo raised an internal eyebrow at Jake, the gloves, his gentle treatment of Ultraviolet, and the fact that he could even pick her up to begin with. Since she was an android and had a solid metal endoskeleton she had to weigh at least two hundred pounds. Or more. “I’m surprised you’re able to pick that android up so easily - she must weigh at least two hundred pounds because of her metal endoskeleton.”
“She’s as light as a feather to me and if Mr. Suit were conscious I’m sure he’d say: you’re never supposed to make a comment about a lady’s weight.” Jake raised his eyebrows at the cyborg.
Nix Duo felt amused. “You speak of that android as if she were a person…you do know she’s just a robot, an A.I. unit? To treat her with such care and respect is unnecessary…”
Jake glared at Nix Duo heatedly. “She is a person. She’s…Ultraviolet. She’s not just an android, she’s…special. She also deserves my care and respect. She risked her life to save Mr. Suit and was hurt doing it…”
“Risked her life?” Nix Duo let out a thoughtful hum. “If that robot is destroyed it’s not like she has a soul that will continue on. That’s what separates us from them Jake - that’s what separates humans from androids - our immortal soul. When Ultraviolet ‘dies’ she merely ceases to exist…”
Jake frowned. “Do you really know that for sure? I think…it’s all up to God in the end. Maybe God is looking down from heaven on Ultraviolet right now and maybe he’ll decide to give her a soul too. The only thing we know about the great mystery of this universe, Nix Duo, is that we don’t know shit.”
Nix Duo raised his wine cup at Jake at his final parting comment. “Touché. I’ll have one of my Battle Droids take you to Gold Fist. You have to sign up with him in order to participate in the E.T. Tech Race since he’s acting as the bookmaker.”
Jake nodded silently and watched as Nix Duo snapped his fingers and one of the Battle Droids began to walk out of the room with the intention that Jake was supposed to follow it. The Battle Droid led Jake to Gold Fist’s office that was located in one of the upper levels of Kaleidoscope. They stopped in front of a metal door and the Battle Droid punched a code in the keypad that was attached to the wall next to the door before the door slid open and Jake was able to enter. Jake gave the robot a quick ‘thanks’ before stepping into the office.
Just as the metal door was sliding shut behind Jake he swore he could have heard the robot say ‘Your welcome, Metaloid’. Gold Fist - the wealthy billionaire and Crime Lord sat in a swivel chair behind a well-polished mahogany desk. His bushy white eyebrows raised when he sa
w Jake with Ultraviolet still in his arms enter his office.
“Samurai Superhero…Jake Lonestar.” The billionaire steepled his fingers together on the desk top before him just like a cartoon villain and grinned at Jake revealing his gold teeth. “What can I do for you, boy? You’re not here to try and arrest me are you? That would be unwise…”
There was a clunking sound as several golden robots revealed themselves from the shadows of the office to stand a bit closer to Gold Fist in a protective manner.
Jake frowned at the golden robots and shook his head. “No, Gold Fist - I’m not here to arrest you. This time.” Jake gave the cyborg a cocky smirk. “I want to sign the SSF up for the E.T. Tech Race and Nix Duo told me that you’re the bookmaker.”
Gold Fist nodded, “Indeed, I am. I’m also the one who’s offering the three million dollars to the winner.”
“Three million dollars?! Woo wee!” Jake whistled. “But why? And why did you buy the illegal Accelerator Tech from Prism?”
“I’m well over sixty, Jake, have no heir, and I have billions of dollars that I don’t know what to do with. But most of all I’m bored. So very bored. I want entertainment. And the E.T. Tech Race provides me with that. It amuses me to see people compete in this race and try to kill each other in order to reach the finish line first. I bought the illegal Accelerator Tech from Prism and gave it to random participants of this race in order to stir up the odds. I like things being…unpredictable. In this race…anything can happen.” A pleased smile curled Gold Fist’s thin chapped lips.
“You just gave the Tech away…unreal.” Jake shook his head in disbelief. “Well, as I’ve already explained I’d like to sign up the SSF to participate in your race.”
“Indeed.” Gold Fist’s beady black eyes glittered with interest. “May I ask why? I mean, Dr. Valery is a billionaire herself so I don’t think that the SSF lacks money…” Gold Fist stroked his chin in thought.
“Nix Duo has Mr. Suit hostage. If we win the race he’ll let Mr. Suit go…if not…” Jake trailed off, not even wanting to think about it.
“I see.” Gold Fist nodded in understanding. “Now, that’s very interesting. I love twists like that. Of course you can sign the SSF up for the race, Jakey boy. You will need six members in order to participate in the race. The rules are simple…reach the finish line first and you win. Taking out opposing teams is permitted along the way. The only thing that is not permitted is for participants in the race to reveal the existence of aliens to those citizens of New York who are not a part of the secret society that knows of their existence.”
“Six members?” Jake frowned. “But Mr. Suit…”
“What about that pretty little android girl with you?” Gold Fist nodded with his head in Ultraviolet’s direction.
“Ultraviolet?” Jake was surprised by Gold Fist’s suggestion. “But she’s an android…would that be allowed?”
Gold Fist chuckled. “I have no rule against robots participating in my race. In fact, several of the gangs competing have robot drivers. Now, I’m assuming you know the pass phrase?”
“Er, beam me up Scottie?” Jake tried.
“Yes, mere formalities, you see.” Gold Fist put his hands out in a helpless gesture. “Are there any bets you’d like to place on the other teams? The Linx Space Pirates are a favorite in this race.” Gold Fist informed Jake as he slid the entry list in front of Jake. Jake noticed there were several other names of gangs already signed up on the list. Jake picked up a pen and wrote in: Samurai Superheroes Force. “Bets? Naw…”
Gold Fist opened one of his desk drawers and pulled out an interesting, high-tech metal bracelet and tossed it to Jake. “Here, catch, boy.” Gold Fist fished a cigar out of his pocket, struck a match against his desk and lit it up.
He began to take deep puffs from his cigar as Jake caught the metal bracelet and looked at it curiously. “What’s this?”
“That is a holo-map bracelet. Put it on. Tomorrow at the appropriate time the race’s starting point will be revealed to you. Once you reach the starting line the bracelet will automatically reveal the location of the finish line.”
Jake snapped the bracelet on his wrist and nodded. “Got it.”
“Before you go, I’ll give you one piece of advice, kid. I’d recommend not trying to take out your competition, but heading straight for the finish line. There are some real monsters competing in the race this year. Compared to them you’re just a little mouse and they’re hungry lions. Well, good luck. You’re going to need it!” Gold Fist blew a cloud of smoke out in Jake’s direction and chuckled with amusement. “I can already tell that this year’s race is going to be anything but boring…I’m especially curious to see what that little android can do.”
“Er, thanks, I think.” Jake nodded his thanks to Gold Fist and left the office. This time Jake used the teleportation platform to get to the appropriate level with the secret passageway that led back to club Salamander. Jake was completely oblivious to the sound of the explosion as the teleportation platform exploded a few seconds later.
Jake had no problems with entering the passageway, getting back to club Salamander, moving through the club unhindered, and exiting back out into the night. Ginger and Pinstripe were still tied up right outside of the club to a lamppost. Jake walked over to Pinstripe and untied the horse that seemed to be eyeing Jake warily as if asking Jake ‘where’s Mr. Suit?’
Jake shook his head sadly at Pinstripe. “He’s not coming. But we’ll come back for him. I promise.” Jake said as he patted the side of Pinstripe’s silky black neck.
Pinstripe let out an unhappy little puff of air and pawed at the ground in an uneasy manner.
Jake mounted Ginger with Ultraviolet still in his arms. “Hyah!” Jake snapped the reigns and urged Ginger to merge into traffic and whistled behind him so that Pinstripe would follow after them. Pinstripe hesitated a moment before galloping after Jake. Jake was heading to the SSF Headquarters a.k.a Dr. Valery’s mansion first.
He felt a heavy weight on his shoulders since he had to somehow convince the SSF to enter the E.T. Tech race so that they could save Mr. Suit. What if they refused? What if he had made a bad decision by entering them all into the race? Jake was beginning to panic with worry. He had acted again without thinking, something he was doing a lot lately.
Unbeknownst to Jake, the Samurai Superheroes were all currently undergoing special training regimens given to them by Dr. Valery. This was her way of punishing the SSF for their failure on their last mission.
Jake galloped up the road that led to the mansion but took the horses to the stables first. After he had gotten Ginger and Pinstripe safely into their stables he picked Ultraviolet back up into his arms and approached the mansion with her. The house greeted Jake in its synthesized yet female sounding voice: “Welcome back, Jake.” The house greeted and then the front door swung open as if Jake were entering a haunted house.
“Er, thanks.” Jake absentmindedly thanked the house while humming ‘Hotel California’ in his head, and wondered if he should keep doing that. Thanking robots and androids for stuff.
Jake walked into the living room and set Ultraviolet down on a fancy silk settee. “House, err, Computer? Where are the SSF?” Jake asked loudly and felt kind of silly speaking to thin air.
“They’re all undergoing Dr. Valery’s special training regimens…Galaxy Girl is currently in the West Wing hallway…Black Fox is in the library…Bulldozer and Red Dragon are both in the dojo…” The house explained.
Jake nodded. “Thanks babe, err, house!” Jake took off, heading for the West Wing where Galaxy Girl was apparently. A goofy grin formed on Jake’s face as he thought about getting to see Galaxy Girl. He had a bit of a crush on the famous pop star. She was extremely beautiful and had the voice of an angel. It made Jake wonder: Can androids sing? What would Ultraviolet sound like if she sang. Would her singing move me? Or would I feel nothing? Jake quickly shook his head of such thoughts.
Galaxy Girl looked down, spotted the broken expensive vase, and swore. “Shit. Dr. Valery is going to kill me.” Galaxy Girl whipped out a dustpan and bent over to begin to sweep the broken shards of porcelain into the dustpan. “I wonder where I can hide this…”
Panty shot! Jake was suddenly gifted with a glimpse of Galaxy Girl’s lacy pink panties. Jake’s eyes turned into two large pink hearts. There is a God! Jake thought to himself as Galaxy Girl continued to bend over and pick up the broken pieces of the vase. Ultraviolet would never wear pink underwear that looked like that…Gah…who cares about what kind of underwear a robot would wear! Galaxy Girl is real. A real young woman.
“Ouch! Dammit! A delicate flower like me shouldn’t be made to do such menial tasks!” Galaxy Girl exclaimed when she cut her finger on a piece of porcelain and watched as a bead of red blood formed on the very tip of her finger.
Jake immediately leapt into action and went to Galaxy Girl’s side. “Are you okay? Here.” Jake, not thinking, took Galaxy Girl’s finger and stuck it in his mouth and began to suck on it. Galaxy Girl gasped, her eyes widening as her cheeks turned pink beneath her silver domino mask.
Jake turned his head, his eyes met with Galaxy Girl’s, and he realized in that exact moment that he had Galaxy Girl’s finger in his mouth! What had he been thinking - oh, yea, right, he hadn’t been thinking - again. Yep, he really needed to stop doing that. “Ack!” Jake quickly released Galaxy Girl’s finger and scuttled backwards across the floor.
Galaxy Girl found herself doing the same thing as she scooted away from Jake out of surprise. “Epp! Who does that? That was gross!” Galaxy Girl complained to hide her embarrassment. Jake’s mouth had felt hot and wet around her finger.
Jake put a hand behind his head in a sheepish gesture. “Uh, err, I’m sorry…”
Galaxy Girl sighed and shook her head, “No, it’s okay…you were just trying to help, right?”
Jake nodded, “Yea.”
Galaxy Girl’s expression suddenly turned concerned as she noticed the absence of Mr. Suit and Ultraviolet. “Where are Mr. Suit and Ultraviolet? Did you both complete your mission successfully?”
Jake’s expression turned grim. “No…that’s why I’m here. I need to talk to all of you. Er, I thought you were doing some kind of ‘special training regimen’ for Dr. Val?” Not cleaning…
Galaxy Girl blushed, “Yea…this is my ‘special training regimen’…it’s to work on my ‘clumsiness’. Dr. Valery ordered me to dust the entire mansion. Isn’t she a slave driver? How can she actually expect me to do something like this? Besides, I have way better things to be doing…like practicing my singing and doing yoga. I need to keep my body in shape after all for my fans. And Dr. Valery has my poor managers locked away somewhere in this mansion and I can’t find them!”
Jake gave Galaxy Girl a sympathetic look. “That sucks…oh, hey, I might have something that might cheer you up.” Jake reached into his jean pocket and pulled out a Snickers. “Here.” He held the candy bar out to Galaxy Girl.
Galaxy Girl looked at Jake as if he’d just pulled a toad out from his pocket. “A candy bar! Get that thing away from me!”
Jake looked crestfallen. “You don’t want it? You’re not hungry after all that dusting?”
Galaxy Girl’s stomach grumbled at that exact moment and she blushed. “Of course I’m hungry but I have to watch my weight…dammit give that candy bar to me!”
Jake brightened and handed Galaxy Girl the candy bar. She took it, quickly unwrapped it and began to quickly eat it as Jake just watched her. Galaxy Girl glared back at Jake. “Stop staring at me, weirdo. It’s creepy.”
“Sorry.” Jake immediately said though he was still grinning at Galaxy Girl. Galaxy Girl ate my candy bar. For some reason that made him happy. “Hey, where are the rest of the Samurai Superheroes?”
Galaxy Girl shrugged as she finished the candy bar and began to lick her fingers of the left over chocolate. “Dunno…I think Black Fox is in the library. That’s where she always is anyways. Did you know she used to be some kind of famous linguist before she became a part of the SSF? She knows more than six thousand different languages. Though most of those languages are only spoken by fewer than a thousand people.” Galaxy Girl informed Jake excitedly. She loved to gossip.
“Wow. That’s impressive.” Jake continued to smile at Galaxy Girl before he snapped out of his daze. “Well, let’s go get Black Fox and then we’ll find the guys.” Jake stood up and dusted himself off before offering his hand to help Galaxy Girl up.
Galaxy Girl hesitated before accepting Jake’s help and putting her hand in his. Being extremely careful, Jake helped Galaxy Girl to stand and she wondered why he was treating her like glass. “Alright, fine.” Galaxy Girl grudgingly agreed and the two of them headed for the library.
Jake entered the library with Galaxy Girl lagging behind him. He caught sight of Black Fox seated at one of the many large wooden tables that had been set up in the library. She was dressed in a provocative, black leather maid’s outfit that consisted of a lot of straps and buckles. She also had a lace-up corset and a pair of fishnet stockings. Whereas, Galaxy Girl’s maid costume was definitely cutesier Black Fox’s was definitely sexy. Jake immediately suffered a massive nosebleed from the sight of the sultry Black Fox and sunk to his knees as he put a hand to his nose to try and staunch the blood flow.
Galaxy Girl rushed over to Jake’s side out of concern for his sudden nosebleed, not knowing that men suffered from nosebleeds when they had a painful erection. “Jake! Are you okay?” She questioned.
Without looking up from her book Black Fox shook her head. “Pervert.” Apparently, Black Fox knew why Jake had gotten such a massive nosebleed.
Jake pinched his nose as he tried to get a hold of himself. He didn’t have time for this silliness. Though, he decided he’d give his perverted aunt a piece of his mind later for all this trouble. Jake struggled to stand and wiping the blood from his nose he walked over to Black Fox’s table. “Howdy Black Fox. So, your special training was, let me guess, cleaning the library?”
Black Fox looked up from her huge book (it must have been at least five hundred pages long) and arched an eyebrow at Jake. “Dr. Valery told me to put all these books away.” Black Fox motioned to the pile of books on the table. “But…they’re much too interesting to not read first. As you know I’m Japanese and a lot of these books are about Japanese folklore. They contain tales about yokai, Japanese demons. Dr. Valery has some very rare and hard to find books on yokai in her library. These books are utterly fascinating. I’m hoping to find out more about the Makai World…where the demons live.”
Jake scratched his head in confusion, “Makai World? But aren’t yokai really aliens…so where they live would be outer space, right?”
Black Fox nodded. “Indeed. And magic is really just advanced alien technology. Knowing this secret has caused so much pain…” A dark shadow fell over Black Fox’s face for a moment before she quickly shook her head to clear it of sad thoughts. But not before Jake noticed her look. Jake wanted to ask Black Fox about it but he didn’t want to be too invasive. “Dr. Valery even has books that contain alien languages. Each alien race has their own language, of course. I intend to learn them all if I can.” Black Fox’s dark eyes glittered with interest at the thought of learning even more languages.
Jake blinked. Ms. Hot Dominatrix was actually a nerd! S
he was totally a bookworm, and the bookish type despite her ultra sophisticated appearance and style. “Oh my God…Black Fox is a Closet-Nerd!” Jake burst out.
This caused Galaxy Girl to start cackling. “Like you totally pegged it! Before Black Fox came to the mansion her name was Hana, she was a linguist back in Japan, and apparently a total nerd. She used to dress in thick sweaters, baggy sweatpants, and had this awful pair of thick-rimmed glasses! She was a walking fashion emergency.” Galaxy Girl shuddered as she remembered Black Fox’s original state before Dr. Valery got a hold of her. “Now she’s just a poser, of course.” Galaxy Girl sneered with her hands on her hips as she looked Black Fox over from head-to-toe. “She may pretend to know about fashion but it’s all just an act.”
Jake was surprised when he saw a light pink blush spread across Black Fox’s cheeks. “Was it really necessary to tell him all that, Galaxy Girl?” Black Fox glared at the pop singer.
“Thank God Dr. Valery got her hands on Hana…if she hadn’t helped Black Fox then I would have!” Galaxy Girl exclaimed with a passionate look on her face all the while ignoring the death glare that Black Fox was currently giving her.
“I probably would have ended up in something pink.” Black Fox shuddered at the visual image that had formed in her head. “At least Dr. Valery lets me wear black…even if the outfits she creates for me to wear are somewhat ridiculous.”
“Well…” Jake cleared his throat. “I think you ladies both look really nice.” He offered.
Black Fox’s attention was suddenly drawn to Jake. “Why have you returned to the mansion? You were on a mission with Mr. Suit, were you not? Where is he?” Black Fox’s expression was subtly shifting to concern. It wasn’t like Mr. Suit not to report to the others as soon as he returned from missions after what happened with Nix Duo and his last partner…
At the mention of Mr. Suit Jake’s expression turned grim. “That’s what I need to talk to you all about. But I want to find Bulldozer and Red Dragon before I tell you what happened.”
Black Fox nodded stiffly sensing the worst had occurred. “Very well. Then, what are we waiting for?” Black Fox stood up from her place at the library table. “Let’s hurry and find the others.”
“Right.” Jake immediately agreed.
“I, err, need to go powder my nose really fast. I’ll meet you guys there.” Galaxy Girl declared before she took off down the hall.
Jake blinked. “Powder her nose?”
“She had to go to the bathroom.” Black Fox explained bluntly.
Jake blushed. “Oh. Don’t you girls like to go in groups to the bathroom or something?”
“Hmm.” Black Fox let out a thoughtful hum. “I think you’re right. That is the proper social protocol in this kind of situation. I believe I will go accompany Galaxy Girl to the bathroom. We shall meet you at the dojo, Jake.”
“Okie dokie.” Jake agreed.
Black Fox stalked down the hall and made her way to the bathroom. She entered and was immediately met with the sound of Galaxy Girl throwing up within one of the bathroom stalls. She raised an eyebrow at this before turning to the row of sinks. She stood in front of a sink and turned the tap on deciding to splash her face with water since she felt tired after all that reading she had been doing.
The sound of Galaxy Girl flushing the toilet was heard before she exited the bathroom stall. Galaxy Girl looked up and started when she caught sight of Black Fox splashing her face with water at the sink. “Black Fox? What are you doing here!?”
Black Fox moved to grab a paper towel, which she began to use to dry her face off. “What does it look like I’m doing? Are you feeling alright, Galaxy Girl?”
“Peachy,” Galaxy Girl shot back giving Black Fox a suspicious look. “I wasn’t throwing up on purpose if that’s what you think. I don’t need to do that kind of disgusting thing to keep my perfect figure the way it is. Although, I bet you throw up. Don’t you, Miss Dominatrix?”
Black Fox tossed her paper towel in a tin garbage can and gave Galaxy Girl a bland look. “Who said anything about throwing up on purpose? Ah, so you were throwing up on purpose because you’re worried about your weight. You’re bulimic.”
Galaxy Girl turned red. “What?! I am not!” Galaxy Girl stalked forward and grabbed Black Fox by the front of her black leather bodysuit. “If you so much as tell anyone…I swear Black Fox. You’re dead.”
“Now, if only you would treat our cyborg enemies with as much hatred as you just showed me then perhaps you would be a skillful warrior.” Black Fox smiled.
Galaxy Girl gave Black Fox a disgusted look before letting Black Fox go with a little shove. Without another word Galaxy Girl exited the bathroom and took off in the direction of the dojo.
A frown curled Black Fox’s lips downwards. Galaxy Girl is bulimic? That’s not good. She’d never accept help from me but perhaps I can get Jake to somehow help her. The wheels in Black Fox’s mind were already beginning to turn as she began to formulate a plan to help the pop star.
Jake, Galaxy Girl and Black Fox met in front of the dojo. Jake had been waiting for the girls to arrive before he nodded at them and opened the door to the dojo. The first thing that met his eyes, however was-
“Oh! Gah! I really didn’t need to see that!” Jake covered his eyes with his hands and stumbled backwards. He ended up running into Black Fox and could feel her boobs pressing into his back. Jake immediately began to blush.
In front of Jake were Bulldozer and Red Dragon. Both men were dressed in nothing but a pair of tight fitting Speedos! Bulldozer was currently bent over the floor with a wet towel in his hands that he was using the clean the dojo floor with as he ran across the room. The cyborg’s Speedo was a bright orange color. Red Dragon was in a black Speedo and was also cleaning the dojo floor in a similar manner until he noticed Jake and the others entering the dojo. His eyes darted to Galaxy Girl and he froze.
Oh my God, I so did not need to see that! Dude! My perverted aunt and her fetishes! Once Jake got over his initial shock of having to see two men bent over with their asses in the air, dressed in nothing but skintight Speedos, the next thing Jake immediately realized was that this was the first time he was getting to see Red Dragon without his full bodysuit on.
Jake’s expression shifted from horror to surprise as he took in Red Dragon’s true appearance. Now it made perfect sense why he was called ‘Red Dragon’. Red Dragon’s entire body was covered in shiny, red scales. He had spiky black hair and golden eyes with slanted pupils.
With the way Black Fox and Galaxy Girl’s eyes widened at the sight of the practically naked Red Dragon, Jake thought it was perfectly possible that this was the first time the girls were seeing Red Dragon without his bodysuit too.
Abruptly, Red Dragon snapped out of his stunned stupor and wrapped his arms around his torso and screamed like a girl: “Ahhhh!”
“Why does he look like that?” Galaxy Girl asked aloud. “He’s all…scaly.”
“Red Dragon’s father was a Dragon Alien and his mother was a human. He’s a hanyou. Or half-breed. When aliens mate with humans their offspring sometimes turn out…not looking entirely human.” Black Fox informed Galaxy Girl helpfully.
“You sure seem to be well-informed on this subject, Black Fox.” Red Dragon snarled at her.
“I’m well-informed about a lot of things, Red Dragon.” Black Fox answered simply.
“Smart-ass, fox.” Red Dragon spat.
“Hot-tempered fool.” Black Fox drawled.
“ANYWAYS.” Jake said loudly. “Now that we’re all here, there’s something I really need to tell all of you…” Jake swallowed. This sucks. It wasn’t like he was even an official member of the SSF and yet he had signed them up for the E.T. Tech Race without their permission. Oh crap, I’m so screwed! This is never going to work! They’re going to be so pissed that I signed them up for the race without their permission!
“Aren’t you forgetting about the most important person
being present, Jake?” A silky voice purred in his ear as Dr. Valery draped her arms around Jake’s neck from behind and began to draw seductive circles on his chest while her other hand made a beeline for…?
“Dr. Val! Hey! Let me go! I’m not your personal teddy bear that you can just hug anytime you want to!” Jake cried out in a panic.
Dr. Valery raised an eyebrow at Jake’s comment. “Personal teddy bear? How juvenile. I want you to be my personal sex slave.” She winked and tried to make a grab for Jake’s crotch again.
Black Fox shook her head at Dr. Valery’s crass display, but her mouth twitched in amusement. “Cougars.”
“Ack! Get off of me you crazy, perverted aunt!” Jake cried as he shoved Dr. Valery off of him so that she went flying comically leaving Jake red and panting for breath.
“Jake, wasn’t there an urgent reason why you needed to talk to all of us?” Black Fox reminded him swiftly.
“Um, yea…it’s about Mr. Suit…” Jake went on to recount what happened while on his mission to arrest the Solar Flares and the Metalheads. How Jake and Mr. Suit managed to take care of the Solar Flares, but how Mr. Suit was injured because of a female hostage…
“That idiot!” Bulldozer burst out loudly once Jake came to this part of his tale. “When’s he going to get over that gentleman code of his? He’s going to get himself killed. Really, women will be the death of him!” Bulldozer opened a can of beer and began to chug it.
Black Fox eyed Bulldozer’s beer enviously.
“Poor Mr. Suit.” Galaxy Girl frowned. “Letting himself get beat up like that…his smart-suit must be all wrinkled. The dry cleaning bill for that will be astronomical.” She shook her head sadly at the thought.
“Evil witch.” Red Dragon muttered.
“What was that, Scaly?” Galaxy Girl shot back quickly.
Red Dragon grit his teeth angrily, unable to respond.
“Mr. Suit has his reasons for why he won’t hurt women.” Black Fox stated mysteriously.
Jake shot her a curious look. “Oh yea, like what?”
Black Fox met Jake’s eyes with her own dark ones. “It’s not my place to say. You’ll have to ask him yourself.”
“Black Fox and Mr. Suit knew each other back in Japan.” Galaxy Girl informed Jake. “I bet they were going out but it seems like Black Fox dumped Mr. Suit as soon as she laid eyes on Bulldozer.”
Bulldozer and Black Fox immediately looked at each other before blushing and looking away from each other with guilty looks on their faces.
“Idiot gentleman samurai…che…” Red Dragon sneered but even Jake could tell that he was worried about Mr. Suit.
Jake then continued his tale recounting how Ultraviolet helped Mr. Suit out, and then how Orochi awakened to take care of the Solar Flares. Next, he told them about how Mr. Suit had discovered the location of the secret VR club Kaleidoscope and how they had confronted the Metalheads. But then Jake went on to explain how Nix Duo defeated the already injured Mr. Suit although Ultraviolet had fought to protect him. Then, with difficulty Jake went on to tell the others how Mr. Suit was tortured and how he tried to fight. Lastly, Jake revealed that Nix Duo had decided to make Jake a deal since he felt he owed the cowboy samurai one for saving the Metalheads from a semi-trailer truck. A deal that if the SSF were to compete in this year’s E.T. Tech Race instead of trying to stop it like they did last year and if the SSF actually won - Nix Duo would release Mr. Suit.
“And I, err, kinda agreed…without asking or consulting you guys first. I know, really dumb, but…” Jake suddenly got down on his hands and knees before the SSF. “Please. Won’t you please consider participating in the E.T. Tech Race so that we can save Mr. Suit? Together?” He looked up at the Samurai Superheroes and begged.
The SSF were all giving Jake wide-eyed looks, surprised at his display of loyalty to Mr. Suit - for one of them. The SSF turned to give Dr. Valery an expectant look.
“It’s really Dr. Valery’s decision if the SSF is to participate in the race or not…” Black Fox informed Jake slowly.
“What?” Bulldozer snapped. “Of course we’re going to participate! Right? Right?!” Bulldozer whipped his head around to look at all of them. “We have to save Mr. Suit! He’s one of our own! A Samurai Superhero!” He finished loudly.
“This can’t be good for our rep…if we back down from this challenge we’ll only look like cowards.” Red Dragon said. “Only a coward would run away from a challenge.”
“Do you think Nix Duo is torturing Mr. Suit, right now?” Galaxy Girl questioned, looking worried. Everyone gave her sympathetic looks before she continued. “His suit is going to have blood all over it. Do you know how hard it is to get blood out? It’s like next to impossible!” The Samurai Superheroes gawked at Galaxy Girl in disbelief at her heartless comment.
Jake turned and gave Dr. Valery his best puppy-dog eyed look.
Dr. Valery stood and gazed at her SSF for a moment and took in their almost pleading expressions. She evilly made them wait a little longer before a grin broke out on her face. “Of course, we, the SSF, accept Nix Duo’s challenge! We’re no cowards! The SSF will hereby participate in the upcoming E.T. Tech Race and not only that - we’ll win this thing. It’s also not everyday that we get to have an excuse to go after one of Nova Inara’s Nemesis Zeros. We’ll take out Nix Duo if the opportunity arises. I mean, arrest him of course.”
Jake let out a breath he had been holding, feeling relieved but worried at the same time. He had been unsure if he was going to be able to convince the SSF to participate in the E.T. Tech Race and was surprised they had agreed so easily. Jake was caught by surprise by how loyal the Samurai Superheroes Force seemed. These are good people…people I’d like to become friends with…maybe even comrades with but I don’t know how to fight. I’m a coward and lack motivation and am a lazy ass. Orochi is their comrade but what am I? Their mascot?
Jake frowned, “But Dr. Val the Metalheads are going to be using the stolen illegal Accelerator Tech…their souped up bikes can go up to nine hundred miles per hour when our genetically engineered cyborg warhorses can only get up to two hundred miles per hour.”
Dr. Valery’s blue eyes gleamed intelligently as she pushed her glasses up her nose, “Not to worry, Jake. The E.T. Tech Race isn’t until tomorrow night. I have an entire day to upgrade the horses of the SSF, specifically their cybernetic legs using some of our own Accelerator Tech.”
Jake was suddenly interested in something. “You came up with the Tech yourself, Dr. Val?”
Dr. Valery had a mysterious look on her face. “Well, actually…I have a little bird that whispers Tech into my ear from time to time. She gave me the highly advanced Accelerator Tech that will surely help us to defeat the Metalheads. However, there’s something I want to make very clear to all of you.” Dr. Valery pushed her glasses up her nose as she eyed the Samurai Superheroes seriously. “Even if I’m able to get the horses to go up to nine hundred miles per hour…I don’t want any of you going that fast. At that speed the G-force that your body is experiencing would be similar to a car crash and your body will explode.”
Jake paled at Dr. Valery’s cryptic words. “Dr. Val could you please take a look at Ultraviolet? She’s downstairs on a couch in the living room. Nix Duo shocked her pretty badly with his living-metal sword Karasu-Tengu and she hasn’t woken up since…” Jake gnashed his teeth in worry.
Dr. Valery was intrigued by Jake’s apparent worry for the android. “Sure, don’t worry, Jake, I’ll see what’s wrong with your Sex Droid.” She teased.
Jake blushed and immediately gave a look of disbelief to Dr. Valery. “What? She’s not my Sex Droid!” Jake looked over to Galaxy Girl and gave her a look as if to say Dr. Valery was clearly crazy.
Galaxy Girl merely gave Jake a disgusted look while Black Fox muttered. “Pervert.” Under her breath.
“So, she was shocked by Karasu-Tengu?” Dr. Valery stroked her chin, “Nix Duo’s living-metal sword is
able to produce millions of volts of electricity. I’m sorry Jake but any normal android who’s been hit with that amount of electricity would be done for…”
Jake paled at Dr. Valery’s words, “What? You mean she’s dead…” Jake swallowed, his throat suddenly felt very dry.
“That’s not what I said. I said there’s the possibility that she may not wake up. And that a normal android wouldn’t even have a chance but…” Dr. Valery trailed off sadistically.
“But? Ultraviolet is not a normal android though is she, Dr. Valery? Ultraviolet is…special. Isn’t she?” Jake gave Dr. Valery a hopeful puppy-dog look.
A cat’s paw smile formed on Dr. Valery’s face. “Perhaps, we shall see, Jake, but I wouldn’t get your hopes up.”
Nooo~ Ultraviolet! Jake moaned in his mind and a tear came to his eye.
“Just kidding!” Dr. Valery laughed loudly at Jake’s distraught expression. “I’m a genius so of course I’ll be able to fix your Sex Droid, Jake! No worries! You’ll be able to get it on with her very soon!”
Galaxy Girl shook her head at Jake. “You are so disgusting.”
Jake’s expression fell. “You don’t actually believe her, do you? Ultraviolet is not my Sex Droid…she wouldn’t let me touch her inappropriately anyways without hitting me over the head first!”
“So, what you’re saying is you’d like to touch her inappropriately but because she’ll hit you over the head you don’t get to.” Black Fox decided to clarify to everyone present.
“Exactly.” Jake found himself nodding before he caught himself. Ack! He had fallen right into Black Fox’s trap. “I mean, no!” Jake was glad Mr. Suit wasn’t here to hear this conversation since he would have loved to make fun of Jake for it…and then Jake remembered just why Mr. Suit wasn’t there and took it all back.
“Yep, you were right about him Black Fox, he’s a total pervert.” Galaxy Girl was nodding to herself.
“He should be locked up.” Red Dragon suggested happily.
Jake put his face in his hands and moaned. “Why me?”
Dr. Valery made her way down to the living room and found Ultraviolet on one of the couches just as Jake had said she would be. Dr. Valery snapped her fingers and several android butlers appeared to help Dr. Valery carry Ultraviolet back to her laboratory. As soon as the android butlers had deposited Ultraviolet down on one of the medical beds she immediately set to work with finding out what was wrong with the android.
Apparently, Nix Duo’s sword had caused several fuses to blow in the microchip in Ultraviolet’s A.I. brain but these were easy enough for a genius scientist like Dr. Valery to fix. After that she had to concentrate on upgrading the cyborg warhorses for the E.T. Tech Race. Dr. Valery immediately set to work with making the horses new and improved cybernetic legs using advanced E.T. Tech. This took her the remainder of the night and most of the following day. It was 7:00 PM by the time Dr. Valery had completed the new cybernetic legs for the horses. She used a kind of assembly line that consisted of several high-tech machines to help replace the old legs on the horses for the new ones.
Dr. Valery made an announcement over the intercom that the Samurai Superheroes were to dress in their uniforms and meet outside of the mansion and that she would arrive momentarily with their newly improved cyborg warhorses. The Samurai Superheroes Force - Cowboy Samurai Jake Lonestar, Galaxy Girl, Red Dragon, Bulldozer and Black Fox - had all dressed in their official SSF uniforms with domino masks on their faces and their living-metal swords strapped to their sides. They were quite a sight as they stood waiting for their warhorses to arrive. Suddenly, the ground in front of the mansion opened up and a ramp that led from the laboratory to the outside was revealed and five horses began to emerge at a gallop.
Ginger ran up to Jake and he inspected her new high-tech legs. They looked awesome. He ran his hands over her hind legs and noticed that it appeared as though she had rocket boosters attached to them. Jake whistled through is teeth in appreciation.
“Sweet.” Bulldozer grinned as he looked over his own horse.
“Yea.” Jake agreed softly, still feeling like his new life in New York City had to be a dream.
“Very impressive, Dr. Valery.” Black Fox nodded in acknowledgement of Dr. Valery’s skills.
“Che…they had better work or we’re screwed, or I guess Mr. Suit is screwed. Heh. That makes me feel better, actually. Who really cares about that cocky bastard, anyways?” Red Dragon snarled.
Galaxy Girl was actually dabbing at her eyes with a handkerchief. “Poor Mr.Suit’s…suit!” Apparently, Galaxy Girl was still worried about bloodstains.
Dr. Valery stood in front of the Samurai Superheroes with her hands on her hips as she gave her team a serious look. “Attention, Samurai Superheroes, these are your new and improved genetically engineered cyborg warhorses. They can now travel up to eight hundred miles per hour. You should be able to keep up with the Metalheads’ bikes now. However, it is not recommended to exceed a speed of four hundred miles per hour. The stress that would have on your bodies as well as on the warhorse’s body is…” Dr. Valery shook her head, looking grim.
Jake patted Ginger’s neck and frowned. The last thing he wanted was to injure or kill Ginger. “Are you sure it’s safe for the horses to run that fast?” Jake asked.
Dr. Valery pushed her glasses up her nose and nodded. “Yes, their bodies are different from normal horses Jake. So don’t worry. You’d blow up long before they did.”
“That’s comforting.” Bulldozer groaned.
Galaxy Girl was looking pale. “I don’t want to blow up…if I did…” Her lower lip was trembling in a cute manner.
Red Dragon started to comfort Galaxy Girl. “Don’t worry I won’t let that happen I-”
“What would become of my poor fans! They’d be so sad! I’m sure my funeral would be bigger than Whitney Houston’s. I wonder if New York could afford it?” Galaxy Girl finished.
“I take it back. I hope you get blown up, pop princess.” Red Dragon sneered.
Jake mounted Ginger and thought about the possibility of blowing up if he went up to nine hundred miles per hour and swallowed. “Um, Aunt Val, you know what? I think I just developed ‘I can’t race on a cyborg warhorse without dying painfully disease’. Think I should just sit this one out…maybe go take a nap somewhere or maybe stargaze. Yea, that sounds nice and not life threatening…” Jake suddenly got a crisp visual image of himself exploding on Ginger’s back, his guts spewing everywhere and he shuddered. His face began to turn green. “I think I’m going to be sick…”
“No, Jake, you’re going and you’re going to be the team leader tonight as well. You got everyone into this mess, cowboy, and I intend to see you get everyone out of it!” Dr. Valery stated firmly.
“AW MAN~!” Jake moaned.
“However, I’m not sending you into battle one member short. SSF I would like to introduce you to our newest member.” Dr. Valery made an extravagant hand wave to her right and Ultraviolet stepped out from behind Dr. Valery.
Dr. Valery had apparently designed Ultraviolet her very own superhero costume. The android was wearing an edgier version of a traditional Japanese high school girl uniform. The shirt was white, sleeveless, and had a purple tie to go with it. The skirt was pleated and made of a silver and dark purple material. Ultraviolet also had purple and silver sleeves that attached to her elbows to complete the outfit. Her hair had been dyed a deep violet color, which brought out her eyes in a stunning manner. She was also wearing a black domino mask on her face. To complete her badass look she was wearing a pair of black leather knee boots that had lots of buckles.
“This royally sucks…” Ultraviolet was complaining to herself as she fished a cigarette out of her shirt, lit it, and took a drag on it.
“Ultraviolet!” Dr. Valery finished excitedly.
Yay! Ultraviolet…she’s better! A sexy new super heroine is born. Can you fall in love at first sight with a robot? After having
already seen her before? Jake wondered as his eyes turned into two large hearts. Naw. “Ultraviolet! You’re all better! Yay!” Jake bounded over to Ultraviolet and made a move as if he’d hug her.
Ultraviolet swiftly sent a flying sidekick Jake’s way that sent him flying. “What are you trying to do, you touchy-feely bastard! Keep your paws to yourself, perv! Mou!” Ultraviolet’s black painted lips curled down in a frown.
Jake was on the ground twitching. It’s not like I would have really hugged her anyways since it’s too dangerous. This sucks. Jake mentally pouted. But…Ultraviolet…she’s okay and she still has her badass attitude. Jake grinned goofily.
Ultraviolet gave Jake a disgusted look as she took a long drag from her cigarette and the smoke curled off into the starry night sky. “Baka…” Why does he look so happy just to see me?
So cool~ Jake thought as he took in her badass superhero look.
“Now, Ultraviolet is our newest member. I thought it was appropriate that she join us as an official member since she risked her life to save Mr. Suit. Any objections?” Dr. Valery gave the SSF an intent look.
“A fucking Sex Droid is going to be a Samurai Superhero? What the fu-” Red Dragon was saying, however-
Black Fox whipped out her sword, evolved it, and lashed the whip-sword out at the half-alien man, so that it wrapped around Red Dragon’s body and covered his mouth, effectively shutting him up. “No, there are no objections.”
Jake snickered at Red Dragon’s plight and wondered if Dr. Valery had been that far off after all concerning Black Fox’s dominatrix tendencies. Black Fox could definitely be a little scary and dark sometimes…
Ultraviolet makes a kickass superheroine…Jake thought to himself as Ultraviolet walked over to Ginger and hopped up behind him into the saddle effortlessly. She had done the motion so easily it made her appear weightless though Jake knew that in reality she was rather heavy for such a petite looking girl. Two hundred pounds heavy.
“Ultraviolet will assist you during the race, Jake. I gave her a few upgrades too. You’re in for a few surprises…” Jake didn’t like the twinkle he caught in Dr. Valery’s eye. “Since Jake is the team leader that means he’s the one that needs to reach the finish line first. The rest of you will be backing Jake up and protecting him. Jake has proven that he has exceptional riding skills so I’m certain he won’t let you all down.”
“No pressure, dumbass.” Red Dragon sneered at the cowboy.
“Shut up, scaly.” Jake shot back, sticking his tongue out at Red Dragon in a rather immature fashion.
“Why don’t you make me?” Red Dragon challenged cracking his knuckles.
“Sure.” Jake shot back in a cocky manner. “Go get him Ultraviolet!”
Ultraviolet hit Jake over the head in response. “Quit fooling around. Gah, I can’t believe I got stuck babysitting you again. Why is my existence cursed? We’re so going to lose because of you…” She began to complain in a pessimistic manner.
Jake pouted. “Harsh dudette, harsh…”
The Samurai Superheroes all mounted their respective cyborg warhorses and then waited for Jake’s holo-map bracelet to activate. They only had to wait a few minutes before the metal bracelet glowed with a green-tinged light and a holographic image was projected out of the bracelet and in front of Jake and the others. Everyone looked at the hologram that was being shown and recognized it as the Brooklyn Bridge. This meant that the bridge was the starting line for the E.T. Tech Race.
“Let’s ride. Hyah! Giddy-up Ginger!” Jake snapped his reigns and headed off in the direction of the Brooklyn Bridge.
Ultraviolet hit Jake over the head. “Other way, dumbass.”
“I knew that.” Jake turned Ginger around and began to take off galloping in the other direction with the rest of the Samurai Superheroes following close behind on their cyborg warhorses. Dr. Valery had already informed them that once they reached the starting line the holo-map bracelet would then reveal the finish line to the gathered participants signaling the start of the race.
In ten minutes, the Samurai Superheroes Force had arrived at Brooklyn Bridge to discover that the competing gangs had already gathered at the starting line - this was a true testament to their incredible speed.
Jake spotted Mayor Stark’s gang - the Silver Fox Gang and the Green Avenger. Jake noticed that they were standing on what looked like futuristic skateboards, but the skateboards were floating two feet above the ground. “They’re like Marty McFlying! That is so cool.” Jake exclaimed. “Just what are those?”
Ultraviolet turned to see what Jake was looking at and saw the floating boards. “Hoverboards, duh.”
“Yep, that’s the Silver Fox Gang…they’re kitsune aliens and they’re known for riding hoverboards. We’ll see just how fast those hoverboards can go, though I think they’ll soon be eating our dust.” Bulldozer chuckled.
The Green Avenger caught sight of Jake and his eyes widened beneath his green mask. “Jake! Oi! Jake, over here!” The Green Avenger enthusiastically waved at Jake trying to get his attention while Jake mentally concentrated on becoming invisible.
Bulldozer raised an eyebrow at Jake, “You know that kappa alien, bro?”
Jake sighed, “Yea, he’s my friend.” Best friend maybe…?
Riding his hoverboard, the Green Avenger approached Jake and floated directly next to him. “Oi! Jake! What are you doing here? I didn’t know you were going to participate in the E.T. Tech Race!?”
Jake sighed. “Er, yes, I didn’t know I was going to be participating either…but…I really need to win this thing…” A visual image of Mr. Suit being tortured by Nix Duo entered Jake’s mind and he shuddered wondering how Mr. Suit was doing. Mr. Suit had apparently been captured and tortured by Nix Duo once before only to fall into his sadistic hands again. Jake knew that Mr. Suit had been putting on a brave front even though he had been screaming his head off in the beginning.
The Green Avenger seemed impressed by Jake’s declaration and his eyes sparkled. “So, you decided to enter the E.T. Tech Race and you intend to win Jake-san? You are just so cool. I know you’ll win! You’re awesome!”
Mayor Stark floated over to Jake and the Green Avenger, and Jake saw that the fox alien was riding a white hoverboard. “What was that Green Avenger? I believe you’re forgetting that you’re on my team.” Mayor Stark grabbed the Green Avenger by his ear and began to drag him off. “See you out there on the battlefield, Jake. Be sure to watch your back. Things can get extremely…tricky out there.”
“Thanks, I’ll be sure to watch my back, Fluffy!” Jake called after him.
“Fluffy!?” Mayor Stark exclaimed in outrage and his fluffy white tail popped out behind him. “Oh bother…”
“Hey, I thought you said you defeated the Solar Flares, Jake, but look there they are!” Bulldozer said loudly as he pointed in a certain direction.
Jake’s eyes followed where Bulldozer’s finger was pointing and spotted the Galaxy Police officers that were currently all disguised as Solar Flares.
Jake kicked Ginger’s sides to get her to sidle up right next to Bulldozer’s horse so that he could slam his hand over the cyborg’s mouth. “Shhh! Dude, keep it down! Those aren’t the Solar Flares - those are Galaxy Police officers that are participating in the race undercover. One of the officers is a friend of mine and she’d appreciate it if we didn’t blow her cover.”
Bulldozer nodded in understanding and Jake removed his hand from Bulldozer’s mouth.
Black Fox raised an eyebrow at Jake. “Galaxy Police? Do you know why they’re here, Jake? They must be thinking of arresting someone during the race, but that would be incredibly dangerous…”
Jake nodded. “They’re after a Dragon Alien who’s apparently participating in the race for unknown reasons.”
Black Fox’s eyes went wide. Bulldozer went as white as a sheet. Galaxy Girl’s expression turned fearful. Red Dragon looked angry. “A Dragon Alien…here? Do you kno
w which one the Dragon is, Jake?” Black Fox quickly asked.
Jake nodded and pointed the Dragon Alien out to the rest of the SSF. The Dragon Alien was still dressed in his silver and blue bodysuit with full-face helmet. Five robots on futuristic bikes surrounded him. They were obviously Battle Droids of some kind.
Black Fox scowled, her expression darkening. “A Dragon here on Earth…that’s not good. Our primary objective is to win this race to save Mr. Suit, but after we win we should pursue that Dragon.”
Jake nodded. “Fine with me. I needed to ask that Dragon a few questions anyways…”
Red Dragon snorted. “Like you’d be brave enough to talk to a Dragon face to face. You’ll probably piss yourself.”
“He’s nothing to be afraid of…” Jake glared back at Red Dragon.
“Ha! Ignorance must be bliss! You just can’t sense his battle aura or else you’d run for the hills!” Red Dragon countered.
Jake frowned. Battle Aura? Is that what that was…?
“Jake, you’re pretty brave, wanting to speak with a Dragon.” Galaxy Girl complimented while giving Jake an admiring glance.
Red Dragon gave himself whiplash as he turned his head to gawk at Galaxy Girl. “Gah! No, he’s not! He’s a spineless coward! Galaxy Girl stop looking at him like that!” He moaned.
Bulldozer gave Jake a curious look. “Why do you want to talk to a Dragon anyways?”
“I’m sorry Bulldozer, if I tell you…” Jake paused for dramatic effect. “I’d have to kill you.” Jake struck a pose, grasping his chin with his hand and tried to look…err, dashing and mysterious…maybe.
Bulldozer burst out chuckling. “This guy is a riot!”
Next, Jake spotted the Linx Space Pirate Gang, which consisted of Captain Linx, Zoe and the rest of the nekomata aliens. They were all piled into a sleek, red hovercar that looked a little like a futuristic Ferrari.
“Cool.” Jake murmured as he caught sight of the hovercar.
Bulldozer’s eyes had gone starry as well. “Sweet ride!” He exclaimed catching sight of the hovercar. “I gotta get Dr. Valery to make me one of those! I love cars. Though I love monster trucks even more. Wait, just think, dude, how cool would a monster hovertruck be?”
Jake nodded vigorously in agreement with Bulldozer. “That would be sweet, man.”
“I bet Mr. Suit could handle the programming. He’s frigin smart, bro.” Bulldozer suggested before realizing that Mr. Suit was currently being held hostage by a sadistic cyborg and his expression fell.
Black Fox shook her head at Jake and Bulldozer. “Boys and their toys.”
“That’s the Linx Space Pirate Gang-” Bulldozer began to explain to Jake, but Jake raised his hand to stop him.
“Yea, I know that guy…Space Pirate Captain Linx and that golden-skinned babe next to him is the Bounty Hunter Zoe.”
Bulldozer’s eyes widened and his mouth gaped open. “Eh? You mean, the Bounty Hunter Zoe?!”
“Bounty Hunter Zoe was one of the Galaxy’s top Bounty Hunters before she retired.” Black Fox began to explain to the rest of the SSF. “I can’t believe it. She must have retired to earth. Jake, how do you know all these aliens? You know, humans aren’t supposed to even know of their existence. Of course, the SSF is a part of the secret society that knows of the existence of aliens but still…we’re not even personally acquainted with any of the aliens here…”
Jake blinked at Black Fox in surprise. He would have thought that Mr. Suit had told everyone about the secret community of aliens living in Brooklyn Prime but apparently he hadn’t said a word. “If I tell you…I’d have to kill you.” Jake said dramatically and put his hands out in a helpless gesture while shaking his head. “Sorry babe.”
“There seems to be more to you than meets the eye, Jake Lonestar. How very curious.” There was a mysterious twinkle in Black Fox’s eye. She always loved a good puzzle to solve.
Jake’s attention was drawn to the other biker gangs that all had souped up bikes, or hovercars. He also made sure to check out their riders that were a combination of cyborgs, aliens and robots.
Just then, a golden fembot walked out into the center of the bridge right in front of the gathered gangs and raised a gigantic white and black, checkered flag over her head. She then prepared to lower it.
At that exact moment, everyone’s holo-map bracelet suddenly activated, glowing with a green-tinged light, and then from out of the bracelets came a holographic projection that revealed the finish line. Jake held his bracelet out before him and the holographic image of the Statue of Liberty flickered to life before him.
“The Statue of Liberty.” He said as he looked around to see if the other gangs’ holo-map bracelets were displaying the same image and saw that they were. This was it. The finish line had been revealed to be the Statue of Liberty and now the fembot would only have to lower her flag and the race would begin.
Jake watched as the fembot raised the flag a little higher in the air before bringing it down with a whoosh signaling the start of the race. Immediately, biker gangs, hovercars, and hoverboard riders began to zoom past the fembot on either side of her.
The E.T. Tech Race had begun.
Cowboy Samurai X Badass Android Page 15
