“You like it here, don’t you?” Nathaniel whispers, returning to my side.
“I do. You?”
He nods. “What do you like the most?”
I stare at the enclosure, looking over the mother’s strong leathery chest, the thick hair, the face that is close to human, the eyes that blink slowly, pondering something I could never imagine. Sometimes I wonder if they are sick of people like me staring back at them or wondering why people are staring at all. After today, I could understand it.
“Their eyes,” I say. “They’re so expressive, so…” I’m at the point where I want to leave. It always happens after a few minutes of seeing them, even though I adore them. Out of every animal in the park, I find the gorillas the hardest to look at.
“Human,” he murmurs.
“Yes.”
“Shall we?” he asks, gesturing behind us.
I nod and his hand returns to my back, guiding me back up the hill and into the buggy.
“Is there anywhere you’d like to go?” Nathaniel asks.
“I come here every few weeks, so you choose.”
“That often?” He laughs. “Given that there will soon be cameras at every turn, I was thinking now is probably a good time to leave. I have to be in the Yarra Ranges at three.”
“Oh. Okay.” That was sudden.
Nathaniel taps Ashley on the shoulder, letting him know we’re leaving. He leans across to me. “You could always come along? I’m meeting with builders for the final inspection on my house. Three years of construction and it’s finally finished.”
“That must be some house.”
He nods. “So, are you up for a trip to the forest?”
“It is beautiful up there, but, I don’t know… That’s an hour each way.”
“You’re worried about Aaron?”
If I go up to those mountains I can easily see this date going for six hours or more—park + travel time + Nathaniel’s house. Aaron already thinks I like Nathaniel too much, but if I’m gone that long…
Then I have an idea. “I’ll go on one condition.”
“Go on…” he says.
“We have that dinner tonight.”
He nods slowly. “You’re trying to get rid of me quickly again.”
I shuffle on the spot. Am I trying to get rid of him? No, I think Jeremy ruined my faith in men. “Honestly, I don’t know,” I say at last. “But if I go there even for two hours it will be dark by the time I get home. I might as well have dinner.”
“Anyone would think that Aaron has given you a curfew.”
Curfew! Hardly. “You don’t understand. Aaron hates the fact that I promised you dinner.”
“I bet he does.” He laughs coldly. “And you’re thinking that if the dinner’s over tonight he won’t mind how long you’re gone, because he’ll have his answer. Am I right?”
“Maybe,” I breathe.
“Do you already know the answer?”
It should be easy. I’ve already agreed to wait for Aaron—we’ve been together—but I find myself shaking my head.
“That’s something, at least.” Sighing heavily, he pulls out his gold watch and flips it in his fingers, looking at the people wandering the park. We arrive at the exit and Nathaniel is out of the buggy in seconds. I think he’s about to leave without saying another word, but he turns and offers me his hand. I take it, feeling his strong grip as he helps me down. As he walks me through the turnstile and out onto the sidewalk, Brewster and Hunt stand back several feet to give us space. The car park is less crowded than before. People walk past without a second glance. I’m relieved. I couldn’t bear another second of attention—except from Nathaniel, who has distanced himself completely.
“Nathaniel,” I whisper. “What are we doing?”
“Let’s forget tonight. I’ll walk you to your car.”
By the time we reach my little white hatchback I’m almost in tears. This is all ending horribly. I turn the key and hear the beep of my doors unlocking—the first signal that we are parting ways.
“Evangeline?” he says.
“Yes?”
He turns me to him. “I don’t want to move to fast with you. I want you to know me before you choose.”
His words slam into my chest, and I meet his eyes. “I’d like that.”
“Good.” I don’t think he even realizes that he’s rubbing my arms very lightly. “So, as part of us getting to know each other, how would you feel about me attending your show tomorrow night?”
“Um…” I bite my lip.
“I won’t go. The last thing I want is to put you off your performance.”
“It’s not that,” I whisper. “The show terrifies me. Large crowds terrify me. Millions of viewers watching. Terrifying. You seeing me terrified—I’m not sure whether that would calm me or terrify me,” I say, waving my hands flightily.
He captures them mid-flight and pulls them down, squeezing my palms tight. “How’s this, then? I’ll go to this first show, and if it so happens that you are as terrified as you say you’ll be, find me in the crowd. Sing to me. Pretend that I’m the only one in the room.”
I nod rather rapidly. “Okay.”
“You do realize that I’ve heard you play Rachmaninov to a room full of people, and you’ve already sung on national TV and the internet which can be viewed anywhere in the world. Performing to large crowds is not as new to you as you might think. Plus, I know Aaron. He’ll have your back. The guy was made to be on stage.”
“You’re not wrong there.”
“Tomorrow night, then?” he asks.
I smile. “I’ll be looking for you Mr. Blake.”
He brushes the hair from my face. “You’d better be, or I want my money back.”
I sway toward him, then stop. How did we get to the goodbye part of the date so soon? There’s even that awkward tension before a first kiss. Not wanting to do something stupid like kiss him, I laugh. “What money? The tickets are free.”
He shrugs lightly. “A small technicality.”
I send him my best glare and take that as my cue to get in the car, waving to him at the last second. As I drive off, I spy him in the rear-vision mirror. He is smiling to himself, while Brewster and Hunt tag along behind him.
When I arrive home, I’m fully prepared for Aaron to interrogate me over my date. He isn’t there. By midnight, I march off to bed wondering what on Earth has happened.
Damn it. I should have gone with Nathaniel. I love forests. I love…
Performance one
The Green Room backstage has dissolved into chaos. Singers are testing their voices with crazy sound effects. Musicians are plucking their guitars in a final tune-up. Make-up artists are hurrying to put the final touches on contestants. Twenty-three bands and singers are going through their last-minute preparations, but not Aaron and me. No, we’re standing off to the side, leaning against a table of equipment while the stage crew gives us instructions for when to use our earpieces and microphones. I barely remember a word of it. I’m minutes away from singing on stage in front of millions of people! And judges! And possibly Nathaniel!
I shiver and dab my forehead. It feels cold, clammy. Truly, I’m doing my best not to run to the toilet and be sick.
I peer across at Aaron. His stage make-up barely covers the circles under his eyes and the bruise covering his cheekbone, courtesy of Nathaniel. He’s looked exhausted ever since he arrived home at eight o’clock this morning, which made us late for rehearsals at nine. When he revealed that he’d been partying with some old school buddies and had been too drunk to drive home, my irritation grew. I shouldn’t care, but he should have taken more care of his voice for tonight’s performance. Not just that, he’s been short with me all day. He never even asked me about Haven Park.
“Are you going to warm up, Eve?” Aaron asks, tuning his guitar once more.
I shake my head. “If I sing anymore I’m going to lose my voice.”
“You don’t look so good,” he says, e
xamining my face. “You’re not going to pass out, are you?”
“Maybe.”
“Deep breaths.” He rubs my back, his hand surprisingly warm on my skin. I’d forgotten my back was bare. I’m wearing that white lace dress again, the one with the cut out back and neckline that sits at the base of my throat. I don’t remember it being this long or this tight at the photoshoot, but I have the sudden urge to rip it off and put my old clothes back on.
Beside us, Fatal Attack are screaming the last chorus of their song. They sound slick and powerful, even with their guitars unplugged. They will win votes on coolness factor alone. As for their frontman, Jay, he’s already wreaked havoc on my name, and its spread like wildfire through the cast and crew.
It all begun at the first dress rehearsal this morning. Everyone was there, each of us watching and reviewing the other’s performance in a small masterclass. Jay had decided to critique Ardent Strangers’ performance—or more precisely, me. Supposedly, I’d needed to look at the audience more, and my breathing was shallow. I’d thanked him. He’d said, “No probs, Snow.” I’d looked down at myself and became highly conscious of the white dress and the loose curls trailing to my waist. I then remembered the make-up lady had painted my lips blood red, and I knew I’d looked pale—that’s when the stage fright had kicked in. By description, I could have been written into a fairy-tale, with Aaron as my knight in shining armor. Part of me is still wondering if the stylists did this intentionally—a marketing ploy.
“Hey, Snow?” Jay calls.
Leaning past Aaron, I see Jay’s grin. “Yes?”
“Your man’s here.”
I shout over the noise, “I don’t—”
Jay points up to the television monitor on the wall opposite. Zach, Skylar, and Hudson are already seated behind the judges table. On Hudson’s left, first row, Nathaniel is checking his phone. He looks bored, possibly impatient, as if he’d prefer to be anywhere else. On either side of him, Brewster and Hunt look much the same way.
Seeing Nathaniel on screen, Aaron growls beside me. I immediately place a curse on Jay, one for him to lose his voice before we go on stage.
“Aaron,” I whisper. “He’s just my friend, okay?”
“Are you sure about that, Eve?” he says through gritted teeth. “He certainly looked more than a friend when I saw you both on the news yesterday. The whole world thought so, too. The newspapers this morning gushed over you both, at the real-life love story unfolding before their eyes.”
Damn. It sounds like he followed it all. “Is that why you went to that party last night, because you thought I’d chosen him over you?”
“I wasn’t about to sit around watching news updates any longer.”
I feel queasy, again. “You weren’t with anyone, were you? I’m mean, you were gone all night.”
“We’re waiting, Eve,” he says vaguely, staring up at the screen.
“We are. But I’m wondering if that means something different to you now that you’ve sent me on that date to the park.”
“Your date obviously went well, because Nate’s in the audience, and I doubt that he’s here for me.”
“Answer the question, Aaron.”
He clenches his jaw. “Fine. Yes. I saw you and Nate together and it got to me. All I could think of was that I pushed you toward him. I saw you laughing in the cart together, whispering back and forth. He was holding your hand like you were lovers, for Christ’s sake.” He draws in a breath. “I figured it was over between us, that you were with him. So I…” He rubs the side of his face—the anger inside of him is huge. “I messed up, Eve. I was so jealous. I—”
“Stop, Aaron,” I croak out. “Please. We’re about to perform together, and right now I’m questioning if I can still go out on that stage and sing with you at all.”
His eyes skip around the restless room, but he keeps his voice low, “Be honest. Tell me I was right, that you’re both together, that I haven’t screwed up everything between us?”
“I already told you, I’m not with Nathaniel,” I say, hoping the words stab him in the heart. “He asked about us. I told him everything.”
“You told him everything?”
“Yes.” I give Aaron a sharp look. “No point lying. He deserves the truth after the amount of people who have screwed him over and kept him in the dark.”
“What did he say?”
“That he’s waiting, too,” I say, as Aaron curses. “He’s vowed not to be with anyone until after our dinner and I’ve made my decision.”
“You didn’t have the dinner you promised him?”
I stand taller, a little pleased that Nathaniel postponed the dinner. “He doesn’t want to rush my decision, so he’s made it the three Saturdays from now.”
“The Grand final is the following night, Eve. What if we’re in that? That could jeopardize everything.”
I shrug. “You wanted me to have dinner with Nathaniel. That’s when he’s free.”
“I thought that would have been yesterday. I thought I’d finally know where we stand. Then it would be just you and I waiting for the competition to be over, not me vying for your affection the entire time.”
“Seriously?” I throw my hands in the air, more flustered than ever. “You want to know something?” He looks dubious, but I turn on him angrily. “So far, Aaron, he’s winning. He hasn’t been with anyone since I met him. You have.”
“It wasn’t cheating, Eve,” he exclaims. “I thought we were over.”
“You could have called me before you cheated. You could have asked me if it was over. You could have been there when I got home from the date you sent me on. But you didn’t do any of those things. Honestly, I think you wanted to screw someone else.”
“That’s not even close to the truth. You—”
“Was she important to you, Aaron?”
He straightens, his shoulders seem to loom over me like a tall building while I’m shrinking beneath it. “It was my friend’s sister. Johanna. We hook-up when I’m in town sometimes. There’s nothing there, not like with—”
“Don’t say it.” I raise my hand.
“Eve. I made a mistake. The idea that I’d lost you…it killed me.” He rubs his head, hard. “Let’s start over. We’ll wait, and other than that dinner with Nathaniel, it will just be us. Will you at least give it a try?”
“Alright, people, it’s time to shine,” Emma says, breezing through the room in a business suit and red curls fluttering from her bun. “We need everyone to move to the stage entrance. If you’ve forgotten, it’s the long corridor on your right.”
The contestants shuffle past us, some still singing, others talking with glee. Me? I lean against the table, stunned. As I glance up at the television, I see Nathaniel at the side of the screen. His gaze is serious as it wanders over the stage and the contestants waiting area in front of him. I don’t know whether this is a blessing or a curse, but his seat is perfectly aligned with mine. I’m guessing it was intentional on his part, a way for me to find him in the crowd. The problem… I feel like I’m betraying him if I agree to Aaron’s terms again. It actually hurts to look at Nathaniel. Weird, as he’s so easy to look at.
Emma takes my arm and leads me halfway across the room. “Are you alright?” she whispers, clasping my arms.
“Not really.”
“Is it…?” Her gaze flickers toward Aaron.
“Ah-ha,” I whisper. Thankfully, my back is turned from him and the few remaining stragglers. He can probably lip read with all his training.
“How bad?”
My eyes fill with tears. I sniff them up, remembering my no crying vow.
“We’ll talk later,” she says, and I give a grateful nod. “Can you go on?”
I manage another nod.
“Great.”
I walk out into the corridor, my mind spinning.
Rayne turns to me. He’s decked out in street gear, hair gelled and styled. He leans in close. “Forget about him. Go for the billionaire
instead.”
“You heard that?”
He nods.
Aaron grunts on the other side of me and I flinch. I hadn’t known he was there. He looks ready to punch Rayne in the face.
Rayne doesn’t seem to care, turning to chat with contestant number four, Friday McNamara, who is all curves in a gold dress that floats loosely over her waist. Her curls have been braided back from her face, and her skin gleams with glitter. At thirty-two, she’s the show’s only indigenous singer, her voice so emotive and huge it rivals any pop diva’s. In rehearsals, Aaron and I were completely floored by the lullaby she’d written for her baby daughter Abigail. It wouldn’t surprise me if she walks away with a record deal at the end.
Dan’s mic booms throughout the studio, as he says, “Australia, please welcome your top twenty-four to the stage!”
The line begins to move as the lowest ranking contestants filter onto the stage, therefore placing Aaron and me near the back of the queue, with Rayne laughing in front of us.
The tension is killing me.
The Fatal Attack frontman cuts past me, winks, then slaps the number three contestant heartily on the back. “You know, I disagree with that, Rayne. Me and the rest of the band have been talking. We think Snow should give Randall another chance. Sounds like he’s woven himself into a shit-fest of epic proportions. But from what I can gather, Randall made Snow here go to the wildlife park to see if there was chemistry with her and the billionaire. From what I saw on TV, I’d be just as peeved as Randall here. I’d think it was over, too.”
“Jay, that’s not how—” I begin.
“Snow,” Jay says, smiling. “You’re cute and all. I even have a soft spot for you, but I’m with Randall. I’d be gutted if I were him. I’d be with every woman I could to get over you, probably with a dose of revenge mixed in for good measure. I think if he’s willing to try, you should give him another chance with this waiting you two have been doing. The other ‘waiting’ with the billionaire, I don’t know what to do with that. That’s messed up, babe.”
Ardent Strangers Page 18
