by Karen Anders
“Backdraft!” she screamed.
Then someone pushed her out of the way of the door as it exploded outward. The hose caught between her and her body thereby protecting her and anyone else around her. Lana fought to hold on as the hose seemed to squirm with a life of its own.
“Are you okay?” Sean yelled close to her ear.
Lana rose to her feet.
“I’m fine.” She turned to look and all her squad members were rising from where they had jumped for cover.
“Good call,” a firefighter yelled. Lana couldn’t make out who it was because of the smoke and roar of the flames.
Lana’s heart lurched thinking what could have happened, but the fire was what was important right now. She shrugged off the incident and pushed forward. She had a mission to clear a path to the roof.
The rest of the fire was a blur. Chopping holes with the large, powerful circular saw, sending in streams of water, steam so thick it obscured a clear view. The building creaked and groaned and cracked. Every so often more paint exploded, sending what looked like fireworks into the air. Timbers gave way with muffled thumps, and the metal corrugation whined as the intensity of the heat bent and melted it. Every so often, too, the air cleared and Lana could make out the tall and thin wreck of the structure.
Lana and her crew members fought the blaze all afternoon, but the paint factory suffered irreparable damage. The only alternative for the owner would be to rebuild.
Lana went back to the engine and approached the captain. “Do you want me on fire watch tonight?”
“No, we’re being relieved by the seventy-fifth. Go back to the station. Good job on the backdraft, Dempsey.”
Lana smiled and nodded.
Captain Troy turned to her, his mouth tightening. “Did you see your mysterious firefighter?”
“No. Why?”
“Seems that the fire was started the same way. Accelerant soaked rags in the basement.”
Lana looked up at the building and suddenly wanted this to be her case so she could stop tiptoeing around. She felt the same shot of adrenaline she felt when being confronted with a challenge.
“Cap, I’m going to find Sean.”
“Make it fast, Dempsey.”
Lana headed toward the building, but she didn’t look for Sean. Instead, she headed for the office, the potential for a discovery sizzling along her nerve endings.
Parts of the office were still intact after the blast that had almost killed her and her squad members. What she saw made her pulse increase double-time. Someone had deliberately set up a backdraft, but the question wasn’t why? Lana knew whoever had done this was trying to kill firefighters. The question was had she been the target?
“Someone set this deliberately,” Sean said.
Lana turned to look at him. “Yes.”
“Your mysterious firefighter?”
“John Fisher? I don’t know. I didn’t see him at this scene.”
“If it hadn’t been for you, we would all be singing with the angels.” Sean rubbed at a smudge of soot on her cheek looking worried and pensive. “Remember how I told you to be careful?”
“Yes.”
“Now I think you should. It’s too dangerous.”
“I don’t need you to tell me what to do, Sean. You may have gotten a new lease on life, but that doesn’t apply to me. I make my own decisions.”
“I’m just saying that in light of this deliberate backdraft, I think you should back down.”
“You think this was meant for me?”
“Yes.”
“That by investigating this arson, I have put all my squad members in jeopardy.”
“Not deliberately.”
“If Bryant doesn’t do his job, Sean, then what? More firefighters in jeopardy, the public. I can’t stop now.”
“Then I’m going to be your shadow.”
“I don’t need a bodyguard.”
“Well, you’ve got one anyway.”
“I think this has gone beyond Bryant. I’m giving my information to Sienna.”
CALLS KEPT LANA BUSY the rest of her shift, and thankfully there were no more arson incidents.
Just as she was about to walk out of the station to go talk to Sienna, Sean stopped her near her car.
“I want to go with you.”
“That’s not necessary.”
“Lana, I’m worried about you.”
“I don’t need you following me around 24/7, Sean. I can handle myself and have been for years. Come over for dinner tonight, okay?”
“I don’t like it, but all right.”
FEELING SAFER AFTER HER VISIT with Sienna, Lana headed home. After some sack time, she went into the kitchen and began to prepare the meal.
She’d had a ball of apprehension lodged in her stomach, and the thought of eating didn’t appeal to her. What was the matter with her? Why couldn’t she feel relief now that the test was over?
Was she in the process of trashing her career? Why wasn’t she more alarmed? Why did the thought of never becoming captain not fill her with panic? It’s what she worked her whole life toward.
The soft knocking on the door sent her into the foyer to let Sean in.
She wanted to go into his arms and let him hold her, but that would be giving into her weakness. And she never gave in.
“You okay?” he asked, sliding his hand into her hair and cupping her cheek.
“I’m fine. Dinner is almost ready.”
“What are we having?”
“Salmon steaks, rice, salad and a nice bottle of white wine.”
“How did it go with Sienna?”
“I told her everything, including the backdraft suspicion.”
“What did she say?”
“She’s going to pick up John Fisher and consult with Bryant.”
“She’s a good cop. She’ll get the job done.”
Lana nodded and pulled the fish out of the oven and dished up two plates. “It’s out of my hands now.”
Setting them on her small table, she lit the candlesticks and turned off the lights.
“This is nice.”
“It is and when I get the kitchen remodeled and painted, it’ll be even better.”
“The last project for your bungalow.”
A demanding knock sounded on the door, startling Lana. She pushed her chair up and went into the foyer. When she opened the door, her father, his face twisted with fury, stalked into the house.
“Dad…”
“What is this I hear about you actively going against orders and investigating arsons?”
Sean came in from the kitchen. When Lana’s father saw him, he pointed a finger at him. “And you’re still sleeping with a squad member. This is too much, Lana.”
Lana felt heat suffuse her face as she glared at her father. Softly she said to Sean, “I’ll call you later.”
“Lana, are you sure you want me to leave?”
Her father answered for her. “Yes, leave, this is a private conversation between me and my daughter.”
“Dad!”
Lana took Sean’s arm and led him to the door. “I’ll call you later.” She kissed Sean on the cheek and opened the door.
He looked at her father and at her. “Call me as soon as you can.”
He went out the door and Lana closed it.
“I want an answer, Lana.”
“I couldn’t ignore the signs.”
“You couldn’t? Are you willing to take everything you’ve worked for and throw it away? Do you think you’ll get appointed as captain of a station with a reprimand in your jacket?”
“This is too much pressure. Too much. I’m only doing what I think is right. What is wrong with that?”
“I’ve made my share of mistakes, Lana. I know the score and you should heed what I have to say.”
“That’s not a very good answer, Dad. All my life I’ve thought that I wanted to be captain. Now I’m not really sure.”
“Are you deliberately trying to damag
e your record?”
“No. I told you. I’m doing what I think is right. The arson investigator is not doing his job.”
“And does that automatically make it your responsibility to buck authority and investigate on your own.”
“What would you have me do? Turn my back on potential deaths not only to firefighters, but also to the public? I made an oath to serve and protect. I can’t turn my back and pretend. I’ve tried to hand the evidence over and back out, but nothing is happening, not until I made sure it did. You should be proud of me for standing up for what I believe instead of acting like me not making captain is more important to you than my integrity.”
“What is this really about, Lana? Is this squad member you’re sleeping with changing your mind? Are you having second thoughts about a career?”
“I don’t know. I really don’t know what I want anymore.”
“I’ll tell you what you want. You want to be captain and I don’t know what’s been going on lately, but you get your head on straight and drop this investigation before it’s too late. Sever your ties with this guy, it won’t look good if it’s discovered that you’re having an affair.”
“Stop telling me what to do. I’m sick of it.”
He stood there in shocked silence as if he’d never expected those words from her mouth, but she knew they were true.
“You’ve taught me to be independent, but have never let me make my own choices.”
“Are you saying that this is my fault? My fault?”
Lana didn’t have an answer.
“I’ve only tried to help you on the path you wanted to go.”
“Have you? Have you really? I don’t know what that is anymore.”
“Have you gotten the results from your test? Is the score bad?”
“No, this has nothing to do with the test. It has to do with how I feel inside. Whether my dreams have been my own or something you wanted so desperately and superimposed on me. You couldn’t achieve captain, so you decided that your little girl would. Maybe you’re not even aware of it yourself, but you’ve pushed me. I need time to decide what’s important to me.”
“After all that I’ve done for you, I can’t believe this is how you treat me. When you’ve come to your senses, come see me.”
“Does that mean if I don’t choose your path, I shouldn’t bother to come see you at all?”
“Make the right decision, Lana.”
HER BREATH HEAVED in her lungs, her thighs burned, and her heart pumped frantically as she took the bleachers as if her life depended on it.
Had she been so blind that she couldn’t see that becoming captain had never been her dream? Or was she confused? Even in college when she’d wanted to change her major to forensics, her father had talked her out of it. Had she let him or was it what she really wanted?
He’d always been there to steer her back to becoming what he couldn’t. Had his dream been riding her for years and as a result had she pushed away her dissatisfaction, denied her feelings, and acquiesced.
She did know that the thought of using chemical tools and observation to bring arsonists to justice thrilled her. She couldn’t deny that anymore.
“When are you going to stop?” Sean asked when she got to the bottom of the bleachers.
Irritation slammed through her. When she’d called him and told him that she needed to let off steam and that she’d call him back tomorrow, she didn’t expect that he would show up here.
“When I’m ready.”
He grabbed her arm. “Lana, you look exhausted. Talk to me.”
“Don’t tell me what to do.”
“What happened with your father?”
Anger burst full force inside her and she paced away from him. “I don’t want to talk about that with you. I’m still trying to pick up the pieces of my life right now.”
“Right. I get it.” He turned and walked away and Lana’s heart lurched. She couldn’t tell him about this. It was too private, too painful to share with him right now. Why couldn’t he understand that?
“Sean,” she called and caught up with him. “I’m sorry, but I can’t.”
“You’ve been doing that quite a bit lately. Is it because now we’re lovers and our friendship isn’t quite as defined as you want it to be?”
“No. It doesn’t have anything to do with that.”
“You’ve always been able to talk to me before. Why is it different now?”
“I don’t know. It just is and I can’t explain it any better than that.”
She watched his retreating back, feeling as if something was slipping through her fingers, something precious and unique, but she couldn’t holler for him to come back. She just stood in the cool night and watched the fog roll in off the ocean, feeling as if the murkiness was clouding a lot more than her vision.
13
“WE PUT AN APB OUT ON JOHN Fisher,” Sienna said as she walked into Lana’s kitchen.
“So you were able to get a warrant for his arrest?”
“Based on the pictures you supplied, yes. We searched his house and discovered accelerants. We also discovered firefighting gear. Lots of it. Kate is analyzing the accelerant and the containers now.”
“Have you told Bryant any of this information?”
“Yes, stopped there first.”
“Did he give you the negative?”
“What negative?”
Lana pulled the picture out of her bag. “See here. Right at the edge of the photo, someone’s been cropped off. I thought it might be useful to find out who he was talking to.”
“Right. I’ll ask Bryant about this when I see him.”
“Thanks for moving on this so quickly.”
“Putting an arsonist behind bars is important. One of my best friends is a firefighter after all.” Sienna smiled, grabbed a piece of toast off Lana’s plate.
“What’s wrong?”
“Everything.”
“Why didn’t you call me?”
“I’m so confused, I don’t know how to express what I’m feeling.”
“Start at the beginning.”
“You know that this arson thing has gotten me into hot water. My father found out and he came over last night, embarrassed me in front of Sean. I sent Sean home and had it out with him.”
“What did you say, Lana?”
“That I was tired of him telling me what to do. Now I’m not so sure what I want.”
“But you have opportunities, right?”
“Yes.”
“Can’t go wrong with that. I think you should do what makes you happy, Lana. Don’t worry how it affects other people.”
“Do you love being a cop?”
“Yes. I can’t imagine doing anything else.”
“It’s not that clear-cut for me.”
“It will be, just work it out in your head.”
“Then there’s Sean.”
“What about him?”
“He’s changed from my best friend into this lethal hunk with attitude all over the place. I can’t seem to tell him about the test or articulate what’s going on with me.”
“Lana, your relationship with him has changed entirely. Why don’t you give it time?”
“I wish I knew what to do.”
“Are you sure it’s Sean who’s changed?”
“You always ask me the tough questions, Sienna.”
“Answer them now, Lana. Believe me. It’s best to deal with your emotions now rather than later.”
“This dare I pushed you all into. I did it on purpose because I wanted a reason to go after him. I should have left our relationship alone. I don’t think he and I can just be friends anymore.”
“Discovery is sometimes a violent thing.”
“So isn’t change?”
“That it is. Listen, why don’t you think on it some more and call me if you need me. You got me in on this case and I want to find this guy for you. It worries me that he’s on the street.”
“Thanks for stopp
ing by.”
“How about a movie tonight?”
“I have to work. Got called in and with the overtime I’ll have enough to remodel my kitchen.”
“The place is coming along beautifully. Be safe and I’ll talk to you soon.”
Lana sat at her kitchen table and pondered what Sienna had to say and what her father had to say. Maybe he was right. Maybe her confusion stemmed from her closeness to Sean. She did have an obligation to her family. And becoming captain was important. She had been muddled when she’d rebelled against her father and the many years of Dempsey tradition at Station 82. How could she have gone this long wanting something and then decided it wasn’t right for her? Sean was the confusing factor in her life. Once she cleared her mind, she would be very sure that becoming captain was the right decision for her.
It would be best to transfer to another station. Her father wouldn’t like it, but she couldn’t ask Sean to do it. It wouldn’t be right. A clean break was what she would need to get him out of her system and back on track.
It hurt to think about distancing herself from Sean, but her life had only gotten complicated when their relationship had changed.
SEAN STOOD IN FRONT OF THE LIST and looked at it dumbfounded. Lana’s name was at the top. The number one slot. She would be promoted.
Admiration, elation mixed together with dread. In the next minute it got worse as panic circled in his gut. There was a significant reason why Lana hadn’t told him about the test. He knew that she had aspirations even though she hadn’t voiced them to him.
He’d come to the station to find his misplaced wallet. After looking in his uniform pants, he’d found it. When he’d come downstairs, he saw all the guys milling about and realized that they’d posted the list of the people who’d passed. It was always a source of gossip.
He left the station and drove over to her house. Parking the truck, he got out. She was outside digging in the garden, her dark hair flashing mahogany in the sun. When he walked up to her, she gave him a wistful smile.
“Hi, want some lemonade? I was just about to get myself some. The sun is hot.”
“The list is out.”
