by Annie West
Mina. One look and the ground shuddered beneath his feet. Yearning filled him.
Instead of the casual clothes he was accustomed to, she wore an evening dress of crimson with a square-cut neckline that emphasised the purity of her slender throat and graceful posture. Her hair was up and a tiara of brilliant diamonds sparkled in that dark mass.
How had he ever imagined her to be Carissa Carter? She was every inch a princess.
She was the most stunning woman he’d ever beheld.
Alexei’s heart battered his ribs as he fought not to cross the room and pull her close.
As he watched her mouth flattened into a straight line and her beautiful eyes clouded. The hurt he saw there tore his conscience and his hopes.
All his resolve, all his certainty he could set things right, were shaken to the core.
* * *
He looked the same. No, not the same. Bigger, sexier, more charismatic than she’d let herself remember.
Heat swamped Mina. Her quiver of awareness was proof that, if anything, memory had done Alexei Katsaros a disservice. The only change in him, apart from the suave suit, was that he looked hollow around the eyes. Tired from travel. She wouldn’t allow herself to imagine their parting had interfered with his sleep.
She was the one cursed with wakeful nights.
She drew a deep breath, hands clenching. That was when she remembered the diamond necklace in her palm. She moved to put it in its box but her hand shook ridiculously. Fortunately Ghizlan reached out and scooped it from her.
Mina had been on tenterhooks all day, unable to settle, after Huseyn told her Alexei was coming. Ghizlan’s insistence that she decide on some finery for an upcoming royal reception had been a welcome diversion that stopped her checking the time every two minutes.
Now she’d been caught all glammed up. Full-length silk rustled as she shifted. Diamond drops swung from her earlobes and she was conscious of the pins securing the heirloom tiara.
Her chin tilted as she took in Alexei’s stare. So what if he had a problem with her royal status? She wasn’t ashamed. She was what she was, as much at home in a formal gown as old jeans.
‘Mina.’ Alexei’s voice was the same, a deep cadence that did crazy things to her self-control.
She drew a sustaining breath. ‘Alexei.’ Then she turned to her sister. ‘Ghizlan, this is Mr Katsaros.’
‘Mr Katsaros.’ Contrary to her usual friendly manner, Ghizlan gave the tiniest nod, her expression a degree short of glacial.
Alexei didn’t look fazed by the lack of welcome. ‘Your Highness.’ His eyes tracked back to Mina.
She’d arrived here unexpectedly, desperate for the comfort of her sister’s presence. Like when she’d been a child. Ghizlan and Huseyn had, in their different ways, provided that comfort. Huseyn’s expression now made it clear he’d intervene if Alexei upset Mina, and Ghizlan bristled with protectiveness. She’d guessed Alexei had caused the unhappiness Mina couldn’t hide. Bless her, and Huseyn too, for closing ranks.
But this was Mina’s battle.
‘I’d like to speak to Alexei alone.’ It was a lie. Facing him was torment. But this had to be done. One final conversation and their abortive relationship would be over. Pain crested to a point behind her ribs and Mina rubbed the spot, till Alexei tracked the movement. She dropped her hand.
Huseyn folded his arms. ‘Anything he wishes to say can be said before your family.’
‘But surely,’ Alexei said, without taking his eyes from her, ‘Mina has the right to privacy.’
Mina stifled the urge to roll her eyes. The air was thick with testosterone, the two very alpha males each determined to stand their ground.
‘This won’t take long.’ Mina ignored the pang of regret she felt at that, and sent a pleading glance to Ghizlan. ‘Then I’ll come and join you.’
After a searching glance Ghizlan nodded. ‘We’ll finish this later.’ Not just the choice of jewels, but, she made clear, a conversation about Alexei Katsaros.
Wearily Mina nodded. She owed Ghizlan an explanation even if it was a truncated version of the truth. For no matter how she’d tried, since arriving in Jeirut she hadn’t been able to hide the fact that something was terribly wrong.
Her sister took Huseyn’s arm. For a moment he stood, unmoving. Then he nodded. ‘Very well. We’ll be in my study.’ His tone held a warning as if daring Alexei to step out of line.
‘Your family is very protective,’ he said when the door closed.
‘They are.’ Sometimes overprotective. But there was comfort in having family who cared.
‘I’m glad. You deserve to have people who care.’
Surprised, she shot Alexei a wary glance and was snared by those green eyes she’d tried to avoid.
It was impossible to look away, no matter how she ordered herself to do so. It was as if he drew her to him, compelled her against her will.
No, not against her will. That was the problem. Despite everything, Mina couldn’t eradicate her weakness for Alexei. All she could do was pretend it didn’t exist. It shouldn’t exist. They’d only been together for a week. Far too short a time to fall in love. What she felt was infatuation.
A lump rose in her throat as she fought to stifle her feelings. She felt so wretched, not like herself at all. Once she’d have lost herself in work no matter what was going on around her. Now work took second place to the pain she carried like a layer beneath her skin.
Mina propped her hands on the table, grateful for something to lean on. She hadn’t thought he’d come. Whenever she thought of that last day his words burned her soul. She’d told herself he’d spoken in the heat of the moment. That he didn’t really believe what he’d said. But maybe he had.
After days of thinking herself at her lowest possible ebb, Mina knew she’d finally hit rock bottom. Shame, outrage and, yes, sheer hurt, scraped every inch of her flesh, making it smart. She tore her gaze away, pretending to tidy the gems that blurred before her eyes.
‘I know because you’re standing there, unscathed, you didn’t suggest to Huseyn that you owed him a fee for taking my virginity.’ She spat the words out, hating their acid taste. ‘So let me reiterate, once and for all, I don’t need your wealth. Nor does my family. There’s no fine to pay.’
In the old days it would have been called a bride price and the suitor would have been ushered into a hasty marriage. But Alexei was no suitor. He despised her.
Mina clasped her hands, projecting as much calm as she could when her heart pounded like the hoofs of a runaway stallion. ‘So there’s no reason for you to stay. I can arrange for you to be on the next flight out.’
‘I didn’t come for that, Mina.’
His voice didn’t sound right. She was used to lazy cadences, the mellifluous sound of a man confident and at ease. Her senses quickened at that too-tight timbre, as if something squeezed his voice box. Till his meaning sank in.
There was only one other reason for Alexei to come.
Another scrape of pain, this time so deep Mina was surprised she didn’t see blood.
She lifted her head and met his eyes. The shock of what she saw reverberated through her. He looked gaunt and strained where minutes ago he’d looked solid and strong. His olive complexion was a sickly grey that made his eyes look sunken.
The alteration was so profound she actually moved towards him, then stopped mid-step.
‘If you’ve come to check if I’m pregnant, you can relax.’ Her voice was harsh. ‘Those condoms did the trick. No inconvenient accidents to worry about.’
To her surprise Alexei recoiled as if from the lash of a whip.
‘Are you sure?’ His voice held a husky quality that reminded her too much of his words of praise and encouragement when they’d made lo—when they’d had sex. ‘I assumed your supposed period was a sham.’
Mina’s f
ingers pressed tight together. ‘Absolutely sure.’
She’d been amazed to find herself fighting tears when she arrived in Paris and discovered her period really had started. She should have been relieved, she was relieved there was no pregnancy to complicate things. Yet it had been final confirmation that the fantasy was over.
‘I’m sorry, Mina.’
She blinked and realised he’d closed the space between them. Instantly she stiffened. ‘Sorry there’s no baby? I can’t believe that.’
‘Sorry for everything.’ He lifted both hands in a gesture that was at once open and weary, as if he carried an impossibly heavy weight. ‘If I could eradicate everything I said that day I would. I’m ashamed of the accusations I threw at you. That’s why I came, to apologise.’
Mina stared, grappling to connect this desperate man with the one she recognised. They were both Alexei, both real, but this one, with the anguished eyes, was new.
‘You were right, Mina. I need to take responsibility for my actions. Instead I got wrapped up in my disappointment.’
‘Disappointment?’ At last she found her voice. ‘It was more than that. It was rage.’
He inclined his head, but paused as if gathering himself. His mouth lifted in a bitter curve.
‘You probably won’t believe this, but I’m renowned for never losing my cool, even when things go badly wrong, even in highly pressured situations. I don’t waste energy on anger because I prefer to focus on fixing things and moving on.’
Mina opened her mouth to argue when Alexei put up his hand. ‘Please, hear me out.’ Reluctantly she nodded and watched as he drew a breath that expanded his chest mightily. He looked intimidatingly big and bold and heartbreakingly desirable, yet his expression indicated a pain that might even match her own. She didn’t understand what he wanted but she had to hear him out.
His hands dropped. ‘As a kid I had a lot of anger, directed at my stepfather. Then at the people who harried my mother into an early grave. But I learned to control my feelings and focus on the future. It worked. Once I had that goal I had somewhere to channel my energies.’
Alexei waved an impatient hand. ‘Sorry. Too much information.’
Mina was fascinated. But she was desperate to discover why he’d come. ‘Get to the point, Alexei.’
A brief smile curled his lips but it wasn’t reflected in his eyes. ‘The point is I never lose control. Only twice. First when I discovered Ralph Carter had swindled the company and betrayed me.’ His voice dropped to a sombre note. ‘I’d trusted him, you see. The first person I’d actually trusted in...’ He waved a dismissive hand again. ‘Not that it matters.’
It mattered. It didn’t take an expert to understand Alexei had major trust issues.
‘Then, when I realised you weren’t who you said, I lost it. Totally.’ He shook his head and the lock of dark hair that had been combed back ruthlessly from his forehead tumbled over his brow, reminding her of the rumpled, gorgeous beachcomber she’d known in the Caribbean.
Brilliant green eyes focused on Mina. ‘I told myself I was furious because you’d fooled me, that you and Carissa were laughing at me. I know now you weren’t. But at the time all I could feel was hurt that I’d believed in you, trusted you and you’d betrayed that trust.’
There was that word again.
Alexei stood straighter. ‘I lashed out because I cared for you, Mina. I wanted more from you than I’d ever wanted with anyone else. That’s why I was furious. Because I hoped...’ He stopped and she leaned forward, eager for more. ‘As I said, it doesn’t excuse my behaviour. You didn’t deserve that and I apologise.’
Mina stared, trying to read his thoughts. She saw regret and shame. But what else?
‘What did you hope, Alexei?’ Her nerves were shredded, her heart racing.
Those stunning, familiar eyes locked on hers. ‘I’d hoped we might have a future together.’ His voice dropped. ‘I’d even wondered how you felt about children.’
Mina gaped at him. ‘But we’d only known each other a week.’
He shrugged, the usually fluid movement jerky. ‘I trust my instinct. A week was long enough for me to feel things I’ve never felt before.’
‘Things?’ Her breath was a shallow draught of oxygen scented with warm male. Her brain froze.
Large hands took hers, their touch gentle yet compelling.
‘Emotions. Not just desire but affection. Trust. Pride. Caring.’ His eyes clouded. ‘Not that you’d think so, the way I went for you when the truth came out.’ His hands tightened on hers. ‘The way I overreacted has nagged at me ever since.’
Mina watched him swallow. ‘It made me realise the way I’ve stifled my emotions all these years isn’t healthy. I’m determined to learn a better way to deal with my feelings. I need to make changes.’
Mina stared into Alexei’s determined features, her emotions splintering in a dozen directions.
Wonder that he was here, baring his soul.
Sadness that his childhood experiences had affected him so profoundly.
Pride that he should confront his problems head-on and take action. Most men would run a mile from the idea of examining emotions and their own behaviour.
Regret that Alexei took all the blame when there’d been fault on both sides.
But above all excitement that he was here because he cared for her. He’d wondered about the future...with her! Did he still wonder? Or was he here simply to explain? Surely he couldn’t be so cruel.
‘I’m sorry too, Alexei. I lied to you and I wasn’t comfortable about it—’
‘You were protecting your friend.’ His hands squeezed hers. ‘Loyalty like that is a wonderful thing.’
‘Even if I acted impulsively?’ Her eyebrows rose.
‘If you hadn’t, we wouldn’t have met.’
The look he gave her, grave yet intense, turned her heart over. No man had looked at her that way. As if he spoke to her. Not the artist or the princess but the woman who sometimes struggled to find her way, who loved her life, yet made mistakes and sometimes doubted herself, like everyone else.
‘You’re not saying anything.’ His hands tightened.
‘We both overreacted.’ Mina drew a shuddery breath as if she’d inhaled a field full of butterflies. ‘I was so attracted to you but scared of what I felt.’ Even though it was glorious it was far beyond her experience.
Was that why she’d given up so easily, scurrying away rather than forcing him to accept the truth? Because she was frightened of where such a relationship might lead? Because she was used to being alone, not trusting anyone to know her fully?
‘Was? In the past?’ His voice was harsh, cracking on the last word.
Mina stared into that proud, handsome face, drinking in the familiar features that could seem intimidating or playful and right now looked drawn with tension.
She tilted her face high, defying the cowardly impulse to lie. ‘Am. Right now.’ It felt like the bravest thing she’d ever done, admitting that.
Mina swallowed as he stroked the line of her jaw from ear to chin.
‘Me, as well. I’m attracted and scared too.’
Her lips curved in an unsteady smile. ‘Who are you and what have you done with Alexei Katsaros? He’s not scared of anything.’
He shook his head. ‘I’m scared of losing you. Scared I blew my chance.’ His words made everything within her still.
‘Your chance for an affair?’ She had to ask, though she knew, deep inside, what he meant. She needed the words.
Alexei cupped her face in both hands, leaning in so his words feathered her mouth. ‘My chance to build a future with you. I know it’s too early. I know we barely know each other, but there’s something about you, Mina, that I can’t do without. I want you in my life and I’ll do whatever I must to convince you to give me that chance.’ He drew a deep br
eath and she felt his hands shake. ‘I think I’m in love with you.’
His words resonated like the echo of a bell, the sound filling her with not just joy, but recognition.
‘It’s unsettling, isn’t it?’
For a moment Alexei looked dumbfounded, as if he couldn’t believe his ears. Then his face creased into a smile so broad it blinded. He released her hands and instead wrapped his arms around her, yanking her close so she was pressed against his hot, hard frame. It was heaven. Mina melted into him, her hands clutching, wearing a grin of her own.
Was this really happening?
‘Unsettling in the best possible way.’ He paused, his eyes locked on hers so Mina felt as if she were falling into a deep, bright sea. ‘You mean that? You feel—’
‘I’ve been falling in love with you since the day I reached your island and you made me furious and turned on at the same time.’ Mina shook her head. ‘I thought love was supposed to be all hearts and roses but you make me feel—’ she struggled for words to convey at least some of her feelings ‘—everything.’
He nodded, his smile fading, eyes serious. ‘Exactly. I want you even when we’re arguing. Even when we don’t agree. I want to make love to you all the time, but I also simply want to be with you, to share with you. To grow together.’
‘Even though I live in Paris and you live—’
‘I’m flexible. I can move.’
Mina’s eyebrows shot up. He was a CEO with a business to run. She was the artist who could work almost anywhere. ‘Even though I’m a princess?’
‘You’re not getting away from me that easily.’ He lifted a hand to her hair and began to tug out the pins that secured it up. ‘Besides, you look hot in a tiara.’
Mina saw a devilish glint in his eyes and sweet heat pierced her middle.
‘Even though my best friend is Ralph Carter’s daughter?’
