“Any number of the staff would fit the bill,” Dayton answered. “Phoenix comes to mind, Wiley, or Two-Bit or Dallas.”
I shook my head. “Two-Bit is too short.” I wanted to pull Dallas from the list, but in all fairness, I couldn’t. I had no reason other than the fact that I had feelings for him.
“Wiley makes more sense.” I tacked on. “Is it possible that he’s the master and the apprentice might be Dixie?”
Dayton’s head shook before I had a chance to push the thought. “Female killers are rare, you know that.”
“But not completely unfounded,” I said not wanting to leave a stone unturned.
As if noticing her for the first time, Dayton wrapped an arm around Isabelle’s waist. “I’ll start trying to dig up information on our suspects.”
“Wiley’s real name is Winston,” I said.
The part of me that belonged to Cassidy withered in shame as I broke Dixie’s trust. The part of me that remained Lindy didn’t care.
♦ ♦ ♦
I wanted to talk to Isabelle about what she’d said in the hospital. I wanted to ask her if she still liked me more than she liked Vanessa. There was so much I wanted to ask her about Ryder’s youth and what had made him into the man he’d become. I knew she spoke to him daily and I wished I could ask what he’d decided to do with the fortune, or if he was planning on marrying Vanessa. Most of all I wanted to beg the question, “Do you think Ryder ever cared about me?”
But the silence persisted for the duration of our trip.
As we pulled under the Rockin’ B arch, I felt dread grip my body. Isabelle noticed and her icy demeanor softened. “It’s not normally like this,” her voice felt out of place after an hour of silence, “normally the ranch is a happy place. It was healing to my soul after I ran from Charles.” When I didn’t respond, she took it upon herself to fill the silence. “I don’t know how you do what you do. Ryder told me you were the strongest person he’d ever met, and I didn’t believe him, not until today.” Her breath choked out in disbelief. “I lost it in there, all those bodies, all that death. I didn’t see you falter once.”
“Trust me, I was on the verge,” I confessed, “but I know if I can hold it together, I might see what’s underneath all the violence, and I might be able to help the next victim.”
“Thank you for not mocking me,” she said as if she thought it was some great struggle to hold back.
My neck grated as I shook my head. “I don’t know why you think I would. I wish I could be like you, feel all those emotions when I look at that sort of carnage.” The driveway jostled me and I winced at the ache. “I feel broken inside because I don’t.”
“You’re stronger than you give yourself credit for, Lindy.” She peered into the fading light of the sunset over the wheel toward the lodge. “Are you sure about Dallas? I mean, I know you have a relationship, but are you really sure he’s safe?”
“Is anyone ever sure?” I said without hesitation. Ryder’s warnings to be careful tugged at the darkest corners of my mind and I had a hard time silencing them. “But Dallas doesn’t fit the profile for either killer.”
We turned the bend in the road that spilled into the parking lot and Isabelle nodded her head toward the barn. “For your sake and mine, I hope you’re right.”
I followed her gaze and noted a lone figure near the lodge. He was bent over, elbows dug into his thighs, face buried deep in his open palms, sitting on a bench alone. My heart quickened as I saw Dallas, but I was unsure of the reason.
I felt a stab of guilt as I thought of Isabelle’s lot in life. Dallas had been mentioned, but she lived with Tate. I thought of her life before the ranch, the way she hid weapons around her room to defend her life if need be. Had she escaped one deadly killer, just to share a roof with another?
“People can hide their true nature. Psychopaths can hold it together up until they break.” When our eyes met, I knew she understood my thoughts. “Be careful,” I said.
“I will.” Her head twisted to stare back at the cabin. I had to wonder if she feared, like I did, Tate’s possible involvement.
I didn’t bother with goodbye; she didn’t seem the type. Instead, I pushed open the door and did my best not to shuffle as I walked up the driveway to meet Dallas. My odd gait alerted him before I ever had the chance to speak. I scrutinized his every movement, every twitch in his face when he saw me again for the first time. A deep breath filled his chest, as if he’d been holding it for hours. He exploded to his feet and stumbled twice on his race to meet me.
Relief.
If he’d cut my lines, I wouldn’t see the tangible exhale of his relief. Cautious of my injuries, he took me in his arms and kissed my cheek.
“I got back in an hour ago. Dixie told me everything. I was so worried about you.” His voice felt wispy against my ear, as if he couldn’t believe it himself. “Dixie said you were okay, but I couldn’t believe it until I saw you.”
“I’m okay,” I assured him, and it was only a partial lie, because I wasn’t actually okay. How could I be? After everything with the wedding, the accident, the body in the morgue, no sane person would still be okay.
“I should’ve been there with you in the hospital. I had my truck started before Dixie told me you were coming home.”
“You couldn’t, you were on an overnight.”
“Yeah,” he agreed, “but Tate added me last minute, pulled Wiley and gave it to me. I should’ve put my foot down, but how was I supposed to know something like this would happen?”
He wrapped his arms around me and I let myself sink into his comfort, but my mind raced. Why had Tate pulled Wiley and sent Dallas away? Was I onto something? Or was I being paranoid?
♦ ♦ ♦
My identity faded over the next couple days. There was nothing left to call my own. Everything I had left belonged to Cassidy. I’d heard about culture shock, and brainwashing by elimination of personal belongings, but the feeling that I’d lost myself overwhelmed me. As I stared in the bathroom mirror after my shower on Thursday evening, I squinted hard to something familiar in the reflection. I was there, but it was faint. Cassidy had taken over with her long blonde waves and sparkling eyes.
Even beyond my reflection, I could feel the change, the desire to let go and disappear into her world. Cassidy didn’t have killers or mutilated bodies. Nightmares were confined to her childhood. Instead, she had sunset trail rides, and evenings in the arms of a cowboy who adored her.
I braided my hair and let the damp length of it dangle down the center of my back. Hoping to run into Dallas, I took the long way, past Two-Bit’s and below the cabin that Dallas shared with Wiley Fox. As I came around the corner, harsh voices pressed me back, like hands that warned me of trouble before I realized it.
“I’m telling you what Dixie heard. She’s not who she says she is,” Wiley said. “And the syringes, they had that same name.”
I pressed my back against the cabin and took a couple steps to the corner. The other voice belonged to Dallas. “I don’t care what Dixie heard. She’s Cassidy Billings.”
I had a need to watch them together, to interpret the body language, but I knew if I even so much as stuck a toe out, Wiley would spot me.
“I knew from the first time I saw her that she wasn’t Cass. Things don’t add up. She didn’t remember Tumbleweed. Or being with me. Dallas, she doesn’t even drink coffee. You don’t think that’s strange?”
“You’re sore she didn’t pick you this time around,” Dallas said, obviously picking a fight. “Your fling didn’t mean much, did it?”
I heard rough hands shove against a jacket and the sound of a twig breaking as someone stumbled back. I tried to imagine it in my mind, Wiley shoving Dallas and Dallas stumbling under the pressure.
“You know that’s not it.” Wiley’s tone had changed, darker and threatening. “Don’t make me take it into my own hands again.”
The frame of the cabin shook as a body cracked against it. Instinctively,
I closed my eyes as I felt the impact pulse through me. His voice turned cold, disconnected, not what I expected from Dallas. “Leave her alone, do you hear me? Don’t go near her.”
I tried to imagine the fight, but it wouldn’t compute. I needed more information. Before I could be discovered, I circled back to the bathroom and traced my normal path.
By the time I arrived, Dallas waited patiently for my return on my front step. His smile spread at the sight of me. “You look great.”
I pulled at the baggy length of my pajamas. “Sure, nothing says flattering like a pair of over-sized pajamas.”
Dallas caught my hand and pulled me against him. “We still on for tomorrow?”
The part of me that wanted to run away from Lindy spoke first. “Absolutely.” I pressed my lips together and ventured into dangerous waters. “I thought I heard a scuffle a minute ago, are you okay?”
His jaw went slack before he could recover. His palm rubbed over the back of his neck. “Wiley and I had a fight, nothing important. We’re spending too much time together.”
Liars have tells, little ticks that let others see the holes in the story. The eyes dart, the body shifts, many times they will touch their nose or subconsciously cover their mouth. Amos hid all those signs away from me, but he taught me that the body can’t hide the pain of a lie, the slight twinge in the shoulder or neck muscle that suddenly tightens under anxiety. It’s as sharp as a pin prick and hard to ignore. Dallas had lied to me, or at least wanted to keep something from me. The way he had phrased it made me feel as though he hadn’t wanted to lie, but needed to.
The cotton fabric of his shirt slipped beneath my palms. His muscles tensed as I traveled the uncharted territory. “Are you protecting him, Dallas?” I asked.
His sigh escaped through his nose as his lips pinched shut. “We’ve been friends a long time,” he said. “But, the wrong choices can ruin that.”
I wanted to ask him to explain more, but he kissed my cheek and turned away. “Sleep in tomorrow,” he advised before he turned around, “we’ll have breakfast alone for once.”
Waiting until he was out of sight, I stepped into my cabin. Dixie stood, still dressed in her wrangler’s clothes, as if she’d been waiting for me. “Isabelle dropped off an envelope for you.” She scooped her things off the bed and started for the door. “I hope you left me at least a little hot water.”
I didn’t pick up the pink envelope from my pillow until she’d left. Examining it closely, I noted tears at the edges, a sure sign of someone trying to loosen the seal and read the contents. Between Wiley’s comments and the envelope, I no longer felt safe with my roommate. I pulled the note free and found Detective Dayton’s writing inside.
“We found Winston Fox’s record, AKA Wiley Fox. He’s got a bad temper, two counts of aggravated assault, one of breaking and entering on an ex-girlfriend’s apartment with a knife. Plus a count of theft. All were settled outside of court, so he never did any time. I would bet money that he’s got other aliases as well. All around, I’d say he fits our profile. Please be careful.”
I crumpled the letter into a ball and tossed it in my wastepaper basket. Setting it on the step, I lit a match and watched it burn. I left it there on the porch, smoldering in the dying light of the evening, a message to my roommate that she wasn’t as sly as she thought she was.
Chapter 26
I woke up with Dixie, but only so that I could keep track of her movements. I didn’t let on that I was awake and once she left, I promptly fell back asleep.
Later that morning, as I was putting the last touches on my makeup, there was a soft rapping at my door. Pushing it open, I found Dallas, dressed in jeans that had never seen the trails and what I suspected was his good hat, carrying a tray of food from the kitchen.
His face became sheepish. “I was hoping you were still in bed. I thought we could snuggle up and have breakfast.”
My teeth ran over my bottom lip as I considered his thoughtfulness. “We might get crumbs in my bed.”
“My bed is empty,” he offered.
I laughed at his allusion and instead pulled my quilt free and spread it on what was left of the floor. “How about a picnic?”
Dallas stepped into my cabin and shrugged. “Almost as good.”
I pushed all thoughts of the case aside as we ate and embraced what Eleanor would refer to as my ‘girlie side’. Dallas fed me fruit, and I kissed the syrup from his lips. Lindy would have been sick at my romantic antics, but Cassidy did what felt good, and everything about Dallas felt great.
As the plates clattered back onto the tray Dallas breeched his next question. “Did you bring a swimsuit?”
I paused and nearly dropped the glass I was holding. “I think so.”
“You get changed,” Dallas kissed my cheek, “I’ll meet you at the truck.”
♦ ♦ ♦
I’d tucked in Cassidy’s only swimsuit when I’d packed, though it still begged the question why. I repeated her name in my mind over and over again as I pulled the suit over my skin, as if it had the power to transform me into someone who didn’t hate the water. Before I could dwell on it, I added a pair of cutoff jeans and one of Cassidy’s glitzy tank tops. I forced my feet to carry me to Dallas’ truck and up into the cab.
Cassidy wasn’t afraid of the water.
As he fired up the engine, a smile spread across his face. “Come on, Cass, you act like you’re marching to the executioner. It’s only a little pond.”
A shiver ran through my bones as I considered all my experiences with water. I prayed he was right.
♦ ♦ ♦
As I stared at the gentle waters framed by the dark granite walls, I couldn’t talk myself out of the fear. Like Sirens of old, the depths sang a sweet song that tempted me to sink as it swallowed me into its cage.
Dallas set his hand to the small of my back. “Come on, Cass, it’s going to be fine.”
As he pressed me forward, I stepped back and shook my head. “I’m not going in there.”
It was Lindy. All Lindy’s fear. All my fear, bubbled to the surface.
It didn’t matter that the memory was false. I’d watched Jackie drown and it was as real as any other memory I had.
Dallas stopped pushing and wrapped his arms around my waist. “You’re really scared, aren’t you?”
Refusing to meet his stare, I dropped my eyes to the ground and allowed him to hold me close against his bare chest. His calm heartbeat soothed mine and I closed my eyes to focus on his breath, rising and falling against me. I felt his lips against my forehead, then my cheek. Then his finger and thumb held my chin and lifted me to meet his kiss. I fought it at first, unsure of how I felt, or why I felt that way, but I let go and met his eager desire with my own.
The warmth of his palms pressed into my back where my skin was bare and I wondered how I’d doubted someone so gentle and kind. Every touch, every kiss, every moment in his arms made me wonder how I could ever leave him.
Eleanor was right, I didn’t know him very well, but did I have to? Couldn’t some of life be left to spontaneity and excitement? Did I have to plan every moment? Did I have to read every emotion so there was no longer any surprise left? I loved the surprises that Dallas gave me, relished the spontaneity of our time together.
Dallas broke the kiss and shook his head. “You drive me wild. I swear I’ve never been with someone like you before.”
“Why would you say that?” The smile darted across my mouth before I kissed his cheek, the space beneath his ear lobe and the angle of his jaw.
He had a hard time focusing and it gave me evil pleasure. “Because you keep me guessing, I never know what to expect from you.” He swept the blonde hair from my eyes. “I’m crazy about you, Cass.”
The name cut into me, but I reminded myself that it was just a name. If he knew my real name, he would use it. My toes felt the cold water lapping between them. It was inviting, refreshing, and my curiosity peaked at the thought of being a part of it.<
br />
“I’m scared of the water,” I said, “but I think you could help me.”
“You don’t have to.” The severity of my phobia registered in his voice. “I didn’t realize how hard this would be on you. We can sit here on the shore. I promise I don’t mind.”
“No,” I said, “I trust you. You’ll keep me safe.”
My words brought a tender smile to his face and his fingers linked with mine. I stumbled at first, like a stubborn mule that refused a creek crossing, but like the patient cowboy I’d come to know, he didn’t force it. Instead, Dallas waited for me to adjust. My right foot splashed into the water, then my left. My nerves prickled against the cold. The day had increased in temperature and it was exactly what I needed. Dallas took another step back and I found myself ankle deep, then up to my knees. My heart raced within my chest and I felt as though I’d run if he didn’t keep a firm hold on me.
“I think that’s enough,” I said between my shallow breaths.
“Whatever you need.” His soft voice reminded me that I had nothing to fear. He dropped my hand so I could choose if I went deeper.
I cast a quick glance to the shore and calculated the distance and time it would take to sprint to dry ground. I looked back at Dallas, the hopeful tilt of his eyebrows, the tanned glint of his damp skin.
I could be his. I could admit my secret, tell him everything, and I could be his forever.
With a trembling hand, I reached out and Dallas caught me in his arms. The shelf dropped away as the water became significantly deeper. My lungs set in a vice. I struggled for footing, but his voice called me back.
“I’ve got you. I won’t let you go under. Trust me, Cass.”
With my arms looped around his neck, I felt the water wrap around me for the first time in years, smooth, silky, like velvet.
“I used to love this,” I murmured, more to myself than to Dallas. The memories filtered back, splash fights with my family, Jackie and mom against Dad and me, picnics at the lake, and chasing fish underwater with my older sister.
Saddles & Sabotage Page 26
