by Ali Parker
And what about moving? She loved her job, but getting out of New York was a smart move considering that she'd have a fresh start, one that didn't include the sad disposition of everyone around her as they looked on her with pity. The very thought of it sickened her. Maine wasn't particularly on her list of places to go, but with Lisa and Sicily there, it was sure to be an adventure.
A knock at her bathroom door scared the hell out of her. She reached for her towel and called out from behind the curtain. "Who's there?"
"It's me, baby. I'll wait in the living room." Her mother's voice echoed in the small bathroom and Kari exhaled the sudden bout of fear. Lisa had most likely called her mom, who didn't live too far down the street. It would be good to let her tears flow in present company, her mom knowing exactly how she felt, seeing that she'd been through it years before with her father.
Chapter 3
The rest of the weekend was a blur, her mother and Lisa helping her to cancel everything related to the wedding with the thought of calling the various vendors to see about partial refunds being on the back burner. Her kitchen table looked like a file cabinet exploded all over it, her mother and Lisa moving papers around to find this and that.
Kari sat at the bar top, looking into the kitchen on her mother as she worked to grill everyone a cheese sandwich, her long dark hair, full hips, and sleek figure very much Kari's older version. Her mom glanced over her shoulder, almost as if she could hear Kari's thoughts and smiled.
"You sure are beautiful, baby."
"Thanks, mom." Kari took another sip of her coffee and set the mug down. "I wish I could wake up from this and it be a lie."
"Me too, but it's better to know now than waste twenty years of your life." Her mother gave her a silly look and yet the sadness still lingered under her cheerful disposition.
"I couldn't agree more. That bastard doesn't deserve you." Lisa moved into the kitchen, working to refill her coffee as Kari's mom scowled at her friend.
"Does your mother know you talk like that?"
Lisa laughed and winked at Kari's mother. "She's where I get it from."
"Good Lord."
Kari laughed and settled back in her chair, enjoying the peace of the moment in simply watching two of the people that she loved most. They loved her as well and she was well aware that each of them would do or be anything she needed them to. She choked back emotion, tired from crying and sore from clenching her stomach as she sobbed. Frank wasn't worth her energy, but she needed to let it out in order to move on eventually.
"Four years is a long time," Kari spoke as she looked up, not really thinking about whether her thoughts were put on display.
"Yeah, it is a really long time. I haven't dated longer than a year since high school." Lisa took a long sip of her coffee, cursing at the temperature. Kari's mom scowled again and Kari chuckled, unable to help herself.
"Well, I think that it would be good for you to go with Lisa and Sicily. I hate to lose you being so close, but being in a new place and surrounded by new faces and opportunities is good medicine." Her mom turned and placed a hot sandwich in front of her, the small wisp of steam bringing with it the smell of buttery goodness.
"So that's a yes?" Lisa set her coffee down, her body poised to jump into the air any minute.
Kari nodded. "Yeah... I guess if my mom's for it, then I'll try it out. If nothing else, I guess I could just come back home."
"Hell yes!" Lisa danced around the kitchen, pretending that the fridge was a good looking man as her hips rocked against it. Kari's mom rolled her eyes and walked out of the room.
"I'll be in here, trying to purge from my mind Lisa's vocabulary and whatever she was doing to your refrigerator."
Lisa chuckled and dropped the act. "I love your mom. I wish we would've gone to the same high school so I could have grown up getting abused by her."
Kari took a few bites of the sandwich and lifted her eyebrow. "Yeah, then you could know my brother too. He's so much like you it would drive you nuts."
"I think he's my soul mate. When can we sleep together... I mean, meet?"
"I'm thinking you would sleep together. He's a whore and you're his lost half."
Lisa wagged her butt. "Don't be jealous of this jiggly goodness."
"I can still hear you two." Kari's mom's voice lifted above the fun and they both laughed.
The weekend would be hard, but next week would be better, and the week after when they were packing up would be even more doable and after that... she'd be back to normal. Hopefully.
Kari slid off the stool and lifted her mug into the air, draining the rest of the potent liquid before taking her dishes into the kitchen. She looked over at Lisa. "I guess I need to put my two weeks’ in at the newspaper. You and Sicily are thinking two weeks from now, right?"
"Yep, unless you want to go sooner. I've quit my job and Sicily hasn't properly found one. I keep telling her she should start her own shop when we get to Maine, but she's scared to death of failing."
Kari turned and rested her lower back against the stove. "I understand that feeling altogether."
Kari's mother walked into the kitchen and moved to the sink, taking care of the few dishes that dirtied the place. "You didn't fail, baby. Frank cheated on you. I would consider this a complete success. What a better way to test your relationship than remove sex long enough to see if anything else remained."
"That would suck to high heaven," Lisa muttered and dropped her cup into the soapy water Kari's mom stood above.
"Life isn't just about sex, young lady."
"What? Who told you that lie? As hot as you are... you should be living the high life, Ms. M." Lisa waggled her eyebrows and walked toward the living room. "Kari, you want me to help you start packing up all this shit?"
"Vulgar!" Kari's mom yelled behind them as Kari followed after her friend.
"Yeah. I guess we could start packing the living room and dining room. I'll wait on my clothes and personal stuff until we get a little closer."
Lisa opened the hall closet and pulled out a few folded boxes, turning around to hand one to Kari. "These are still in here from when we moved you in a year ago?"
"Yeah well, I knew I'd be moving out before too long and really didn't want to have to buy more. I hate spending money on stupid stuff." Kari shrugged and walked to the small entertainment center in the middle of her living room, dropping to her knees and pulling DVDs out to box up.
The front door of her apartment opened and she could hear her mom talking with her brother. She looked over at Lisa as her friend’s eyes grew wide.
"A boy is here..." Lisa whispered with a wicked smile on her pretty face.
"Not just any boy, my brother." Kari stood up and walked toward the sound of voices, Lisa giggling behind her as if the girl had never seen a boy.
"He did what?!" Her brother's voice grew loud, his large frame hovering over the bar top as he spoke to their mother. Kari put a hand on his back and he turned, realization washing over his handsome features just before he pulled her into a tight bear hug.
She was a normal-sized woman, but in the embrace of her brother's large arms she felt almost doll-like. She patted his back and murmured into his chest that he was choking her.
"Oh sorry, sis." He moved back a little, but still kept a hold on her. His chestnut hair so much lighter than hers or their mother’s, her brother resembling their father much more in appearance. "Are you okay? I mean, obviously you're not okay, but are you hanging in there?"
Lisa cleared her throat from the opening to the dining room. "She'll get through it. It will take some time, but it always does when your heart gets involved."
Marc turned his attention from Kari toward Lisa, a smile touching his mouth. "Yes, love has a way of messing up everything."
"Marc Martin. You better watch your mouth around me." Their mother walked toward them, her hand on her hip.
He held up his hands and backed up a little as Kari smiled. "Sorry, momma. I was just speak
ing the truth."
Lisa extended her hand, her other one on her hip as she batted her eyes. "I'm Lisa, Kari's best friend from college."
"I've heard about you. She says you're my other half." He took her hand and shook it, his lips tugging into a smirk.
"Good Lord I hope not." Kari's mom popped Marc in the chest and gave Lisa a very motherly look.
"It's all good, Ms. M. I'm not interested in long-term engagements. I'll be a crazy cat lady when I'm old, but until then... lust every day of the week."
Kari pushed her brother’s chest slightly until he let go of Lisa's hand and backed up another step. "You guys can do this age-old dance another time. I'm not in the mood to be sprayed by your mating fluids."
"Kari Martin!"
"Sorry, Mom, but you know it's true." Kari shrugged and smiled, the tension in the room dying down from her sense of loss.
"I'm so glad mom heard you say that. All these years I've been telling her how horrid you are and finally you prove it. Just filthy!" He winked at Lisa and protected himself as Kari and her mother started swatting at him.
"Leave the poor boy alone. If he is my soul mate I'd rather you not scratch him up please," Lisa chided them, the blush on her cheeks giving Kari a quick temperature gauge that something beyond mere silliness might be up.
"Alright, well... enough for me today." Kari's mom pulled her into a hug, kissing the side of her face before moving to Marc and reaching up for the same. They finished their goodbyes, Kari's mom giving Lisa one last lecture about her language and lust before slipping out the door. They had dinner plans later that week, and her mom would come back to help her sort through her personal items and help her pack over the weekend.
Kari closed the door behind her, turning to look over her shoulder at Lisa and Marc as they stood flirting in her kitchen. She locked the door and walked back to the living room, taking her position once more of cleaning up and clearing out. The soft snorts of laughter coming from both her brother and Lisa warmed her heart and stabbed her soul all in the same moment.
Things would never be the same between her and men. She would always question where he, whoever the hell he was, or where he'd been or where he was going. The sense of inadequacy kept reappearing and she beat it back as best as she could, but the common denominator in the situation was her, right?
It was she who hadn’t pleased Frank enough for him to wait.
It was she who hadn’t been the right size or shape for him to be satisfied.
It was her relationship with him that wasn't as strong as she thought or hoped.
It was her.
She sat back on her heels and closed her eyes, her fingers rubbing at her temples as she tried to push her depraved thoughts back. Beating herself up over a cheating bastard wasn't going to do her any good, and yet, she couldn't help herself.
Her phone buzzed beside her and she cringed at the thought of seeing his handsome face on the small screen again. She needed to get it off of there.
It was a text from Sicily: Just checking to make sure you're doing okay. You need anything from me?
Kari hit reply: Not unless you want to come take Lisa away. I'm not sure if she's seducing my brother or my brother is seducing her.
The phone rang, Kari jumping with a small yelp. She answered it quickly, Sicily talking before she could even say hello.
"Wait... isn't your brother a baby?"
Kari laughed, leaning back on her heels to look at them in the kitchen. "He's a really big baby if that's what we're calling him."
"How old is he? You refer to him all the time as your baby brother."
"He is my baby brother, but he's six-foot-four and two hundred thirty pounds."
"That's not little. Is he hot?"
"Too late, sister," Kari chided. "Lisa seems to already have her claws in him."
"How old is he?"
"Let's see... I'm twenty five, so he just turned twenty-one."
"Twenty-one? That seems like ages ago for us." Sicily laughed into the phone. "And Lisa seems to be all up in his grill?"
Kari leaned back again, her brother having moved a few steps closer to her friend. "I'd be surprised if they don't go on a date tonight."
"NO!"
Kari jerked at Sicily's voice raising so drastically. "Um, why? He's not your type at all. I promise. He's right up Lisa's alley... um literally."
"I'm sure he is, but we're leaving in two weeks. What would be the freaking odds of Lisa falling in love for the first time... well..."
Kari finished it for her. "Ever."
"Yes! For the first time ever and we have to go. We've already signed the lease on the house and Lisa's got a job and everything is set," Sicily huffed into the phone.
"I doubt that's going to happen, but I'll put the brakes on them if you want me to."
"No. Just give the phone to her and tell her it's me."
Kari laughed, grunting a little as she stood up. "Okay. This should be interesting."
She walked into the kitchen and slipped her hand between Marc and Lisa, both of them looking at the phone and then her. "It's Sicily for you, Lisa."
Lisa sighed and moved back a few steps, sitting down at the dining room table before responding, "Hey, what's up?"
Kari turned to her brother as he moved closer to her, his large hands reaching out to rub her arms as concerned filled his face. He was a man-whore no doubt, but he worshiped her like she was his hero. He had since they were little. She moved closer and wrapped her arms around his muscular center, pressing her cheek to his chest as she melted against him. He was one of the few people she'd ever really trust - completely.
"I'm going to kill Frank, by the way." Her brother spoke against her hair.
She nodded and took in a shaky breath. "I keep thinking that these horrible emotions will stop. One minute I'm fine and the next I think I'm the most worthless person in the universe."
Marc moved back and put his hands around her face, tilting it up toward him. The stern look on his features fit him better than she imagined it might. "You’re beautiful and smart, funny and loving. You are everything any man would want. He cheated on you because he is worthless without physical stimulation to remind him that he's a man and he's wanted. He's a piece of shit and you are a priceless jewel. Do you hear me?"
She felt tears swim against her vision as she bit into her lip. He pulled her close again as she simply nodded her agreement. Lisa broke into the moment with a loud, exasperated sigh.
"I guess I need to go."
Kari moved back and wiped her eyes as Marc questioned Lisa's reason for leaving.
"So soon?" He put an arm around Kari, but his attention was all for Lisa.
"I guess. My roommate locked herself out of the house and needs me to come over and let her in." She shrugged, turning her attention toward Kari. "Alright, well... I love you. I'll be over tomorrow night after work. Good luck putting in your notice tomorrow."
Marc stiffened beside her. "Notice for what?"
Lisa winced. "Oh shit. I thought he knew. Okay, well - I'm out."
Kari growled at her friend, walking her to the door and turning back toward her brother, his hands on his hips. The look in his eyes was pensive.
"Tell me what's going on - now."
Chapter 4
Steve sat back in his chair, Kari waiting for the explosion. Her boss had taken her under his wing for the last two years and had tried to start grooming her for larger responsibilities at the newspaper. She was happy just taking photos here and there wherever he needed her, but Steve wanted to eventually get her in front of a camera. She was quiet and introverted by nature, her willingness to stay in the background suiting her perfectly as a photographer, but he wouldn't have it.
"Where the hell is Bar Harbor? Is it even big enough to be on a map?" he grumbled, turning toward his computer, his thinning black hair combed over as best he could manage. He reached up and smoothed it down as if her thoughts were being read.
She crossed her a
rms across her chest and leaned back in her chair, so grateful that he hadn't thought to scream at her just yet. The meeting wasn't over, but he seemed to be taking it better than she thought he would. He was highly emotional and belonged on a Broadway stage somewhere rather than behind a desk at a newspaper. He was rail thin and yet his eyes shone with secrets that the world might die to know about.
"It's in Maine," Kari responded, suddenly realizing that she didn't know much more than that. Having just made the decision to move with Lisa and Sicily, she hadn't really taken the time to dig deep into what her new surroundings would look like. She honestly didn't care. It would most likely just be an extended vacation and then she'd return to New York. How a city girl would ever survive anywhere but the heart of the city was beyond her.
"Well no shit, Sherlock. I knew that. But in the scope of your career... where is this place? Is it where Bigfoot has been seen or where Jimmy Hoffa's bones have been claimed to be buried?" He turned from the computer, his thin fingers tapping rapidly on the large wooden desk between them.
"I don't know. I just know that life has thrown a truck full of lemons at me and I need to get out of here, Steve." She sighed, her fingers coming up to rub along the bridge of her nose, his stare burning a hole in the top of her head.
"I understand."
She looked up, waiting for the rest of his dissertation on how he understood all right. He understood that she was running instead of fighting. He understood that she was racing from a great and grand career to the middle of nowhere. He understood that she was throwing away the opportunity to be coached and mentored by one of the best known names in newspaper in the twenty-first century.
He stopped at simply, I understand?
"You understand what?" she muttered, her hands dropping back into her lap, trying to remain focused as the colorful awards that littered the walls of his large office called for her attention. Just beyond his chair was one of the best views of the New York City lights, the small corner of the city snuggling in the newspaper as if it were one of its own and beloved.
