“Brody, stop playing with that bear and help me look for it!”
“Yeah, who's the doofus now? You're the one that lost the money.”
“Come on, we're going to have to backtrack to find it.” Jayden took off on the run with Brody following as they kept the conversation going.
That didn't sound like such a good idea to Brody and he was trying harder to think smarter. “If we backtrack aren't we gonna run into the mother bear?”
“The way things are going I'm sure we will. And you can walk right up to her and giver her back the cub and tell her to be more careful.” Jayden was in a panic as he frantically searched for the money.
Brody scratched his head vigorously as he ran, which wasn't easy. “Hey that could work. If she sees her cub she might not be in such a hurry to eat us.”
“Come on we have to find that money!”
The bear cub again approached Brody and sat in front of him. Brody looked down at the bear as the cub looked up at him; he scanned the area and there was no mother to be seen. He bent down and talked to the cub loudly so that the bear could understand him. “YOU are a BEAR! You have to find other bears! We are peoples! There's no point in following us because we're not bears! See? I have no fur!”
Jayden had to stop and watch. “Oh brother.”
“This bear is not too bright,” said Brody.
“One of you is definitely not too bright,” said Jayden.
The cub sat and raised its back foot and commenced to chew on it and then fell over, and they both got such a kick out of it. They thought it was hilarious and so cute.
Brody shook his head, thinking that he might actually have to teach that bear how to be a bear. “Don't eat your own foot because you need that to walk on! Jayden that is one dumb bear. He's trying to eat his own foot. Look at him! I can't talk him out of it.”
“He's just playing you doofus.”
“What kind of a sick game is that?” Brody looked to his left as Jayden continued to search for the money. He saw a moose just standing there. “Hey Jayden, look how big that dog is!”
Jayden looked up at the moose and he didn't think that anyone could be that stupid. “That is a moose. Don't you even know a moose when you see one? You can't tell me that you have never seen a moose on television.” If there had been a cliff nearby Jayden would have seriously considered throwing Brody off of it.
Brody scratched his head again. “Well, what's he doing out in the woods? Shouldn't he be with his own people?”
“Did your mother drop you on your head when you were a baby?”
“Of course not but she did throw me out the window a couple of times; we were only on the second floor. That's a joke Jayden.” He was proud of that joke.
Jayden shook his head. There was an awkward silence as they stared at one another but for now Jayden had nothing more to say to his stupidity. He spotted the bag of money and ran as fast as he could to pick it up. He even hugged it. “Thank god I found it!”
“Thank you god,” said Brody. “Hope that moose doesn't try to bite us. Here boy! Come here boy! We have a bear that you can play with. What if that moose follows us home?”
“He's not going to follow us home.”
“But what if he does?”
“Then you can tie him out in the backyard.”
They continued on into the forest, now far from the forest path. The came to a vigorous brook and sat on the bank to rest. They were quiet for a time as Jayden went into his backpack and took out two ham and cheese sandwiches. The cub again approached them and sat nearby; making a funny noise that caught their attention.
“Brody, I think that bear's mother was probably killed.”
Brody looks really surprised. “No! Took a heart attack?”
“Probably shot.”
“Who shot her?”
“Now how the hell should I know that?” Jayden was definitely annoyed.
Brody looked at the bear as it started to chew on his pants leg and felt sorry for it. “What's that little, ouch, bear going to do, ouch, without a mother?”
“Probably die.”
Brody imagined the poor little bear lying dead in the forest. “That's terrible. What if I could teach him how to be a bear? What does a bear eat?”
Jayden was just about ready to count the money. One would think that Jayden would be used to his stupidity by now but it wasn't something that he could get used to at all. “They eat fish and berries and people that are dumb enough to wander in the woods. Some bears eat honey.”
Brody got up and jumped in the brook. “Watch me bear. Over here! See you get in the water like this and when a fish swims by you catch it in your talons like this.” He stuck his hands in the water and pulled out a big fish and threw it on the bank where the bear pounced on it. “Jayden, did you see that? I caught a fish with my bear hands. Look, he's eating it alive! I did it! I taught him how to fish.”
“Eating it alive. What do you want him to do? Hit it with a shovel?” Jayden was flabbergasted. “How on earth did you catch that fish? I've never seen anything like it.”
“He could hit it against a tree and knock it out before eating it. Hey, am I the bear's mother now?”
“Yes, you're the bear's mother.”
“Cool.”
Jayden opened the bag and there was an explosion of sorts; his face was now red and covered in dye. It made him jump back but he wasn't faster than the dye. He staggered around and then fell over an old broken tree stump.
Chapter Ten
SAM'S WATCH WENT OFF AT 5 A.M. and his eyes immediately opened, because when one had something so important to do it was often difficult to sleep. It had been a restless night and all the snoring didn't help. It shouldn't have been easy to be so determined to venture that far into the forest, where both a challenging distance and perhaps even danger might await them, but what they had discovered made it all worthwhile. The deep forest was not to be taken lightly because there would be no one to rely on but themselves. Night time in the forest was the scariest time of all, with no street lights to diminish the darkness it was a different level of blackness. It would be so easy to imagine monsters in there, and what if they ran into Bigfoot? Most people didn't believe that Bigfoot was genuine but what if he was? And what if his food of preference was 11-year-old boys?
There were lots of things to consider before trekking out into the deep forest.
“Who, who,” asked the nearby barn owl from high atop his tree, his reflective binocular vision catching the movement of a rat on the forest floor. A nonvenomous bullsnake started to slither toward the rat that made a run for it; it managed to escape the snake but not the owl. He hadn't been fast enough to avoid being a snack. Two woodpeckers pecking on the same fir tree sent their echoes bouncing through the forest, giving the area a nice atmosphere. The insects they were dislodging from beneath the bark were delicious.
“Five o'clock comes too freaking early,” Sam said to himself. He got up and accidentally stepped on Jake's foot; he turned over and went right back to sleep. Some people were not easily awoken at such an early hour.
Both Randy and Michael were snoring up a storm, so loud that they appeared to be having a contest. Sam went outside to pee and enjoyed the quietness of the morning although there was a dog barking somewhere far away; he didn't imagine the neighbors would be happy to hear that at this time of the morning. Sounded like a big dog too. Sam took in a deep breath of fresh air, and it was a little cool but not bad at all. He wasn't sure why but he had always loved the scent of the forest, probably because his father had taken him camping when he was only two. Back home in the living room was a picture of them holding up what looked to be a smiling a turtle they had discovered.
Although the sky was starting to lighten he could still see some stars and wondered where the saucer had come from and what kind of strange beings had been in it? Or had it been a robot ship with no life in it; perhaps it had been sent to take photos and such? He hoped if the aliens came back f
or the saucer that they wouldn't be too scary looking, especially not like the monsters in the movies. He knew he might never get over seeing a real monster. It would be no fun to be eaten by aliens.
Johnny was the next one to exit the tent after he had pushed the others awake. He tripped and fell out of the tent, getting up he stretched, yawned and playfully pushed Sam. “I can't wait to get back to the saucer! You got your father's cordless drill?”
“It's in my backpack.”
Johnny nodded. “Sam, how do you think Randy's gonna handle this trip? He seems kinda freaked out to me. He's trying hard to not show that he's scared but he is.”
Sam cracked his own neck. “Wouldn't you be? He can't run away if a bear shows up. He has to depend on us. Not being able to walk must be a pain. He's gonna be miserable until he sees it, and then it's all gonna be worth it.”
When Johnny realized that no one was moving he screamed into the tent. “Time to get up!”
The walls of the tent revealed bulges from them stirring inside. Several minutes later Michael and Jake brought Randy out and they got busy getting all their stuff ready. Jake was practically sleepwalking as he staggered around. They were bringing extra food and water just in case; they knew it was important to be prepared when venturing out into the forest. They were also bringing matches covered in plastic. Those who went into the forest unprepared would be sorry and maybe even end up being food for the bugs. Last time they had run out of food and were quite hungry by the time they got home but not this time. This time they were ready for anything.
Suddenly they could hear branches cracking in the woods, the noise was coming from somewhere off the forest path, but it certainly got their attention. The fear woke them all up. What the heck was it? Could it be a wolf or a bear? It definitely sounded like it was big and strong. And it sounded like it was moving a lot faster than a person could. Who else would be in the woods so early in the morning? It had to be an animal. Randy pointed his flashlight at Sam and could see that he was also a little frightened, and they hadn't even started the adventure yet.
“Relax guys I have pepper spray. That's if I can find it.” Sam searched his pockets as whatever it was getting louder and closer. Sounded like it was on a mission too, but hopefully the mission wasn't to eat them for breakfast. He was unable to find the spray.
It was moving fast and Michael thought that it was probably a wolf. It was snapping branches as if they were twigs and they thought that it was moving too fast to be a bear. Sam finally had his hand on his pepper spray but couldn't get his hand out of his pocket as it was upon them. They all screamed as Randy fell over backwards.
It came out of the forest like a bull after a matador.
Chapter Eleven
Brody looked at Jayden's red face. “Didn't you tell them not to put one of those things in there? Shit bird is your face ever red.”
“I did tell them but some people are just not honest.” Jayden tried hard to wipe the ink off his face but it was no use.
Brody laughed. “Well they certainly don't know how to follow instructions. You look like some sort of red faced monster. Didn't you check the bag before we left the bank?”
Jayden was so angry at himself that he could barely think straight. “That's how it works, as soon as you check the bag, bang. Damn it! Now the money is all ruined. And it's all my fault! I'm as dumb as you are.”
Brody killed a mosquito on the back of his neck. “Maybe next time you should shoot the lights out to show them that we're serious. Or if the bank manager is wearing a hat you could shoot his hat off. That old woman wasn't showing us any respect at all; maybe we should have shot her.”
“Trying to shoot someone hat off is too dangerous.”
Brody killed another mosquito. “Maybe we should have screamed louder.” The bear cub started to chew on his own foot again and Brody got down with the bear and played with him. “Hey, we can go home now. The money's no good so we didn't steal anything.”
“That's not how it works. Maybe I should have shot you to show them how serious we were?”
Brody thought about it and shook his head. “That's how it should work. You mean to tell me that we still have to stay in here for a week? And they'll still throw us in jail even if the money is ruined?”
“Yup. And then we gotta get out of Dodge.”
“When did this place change its name to Dodge?” Brody killed another mosquito.
“Just now.”
“Cool.”
Jayden shook his head. “Your tombstone should read: Here Lies Stupid, he doesn't even know he's dead.”
The cub scratched his right arm and made him bleed. “Ow! That freaking hurt. Bad bear don't hurt your mother. Jayden, it is possible to not know your dead. Let's say you're walking down the road and you get hit by lightning and killed. You wouldn't be expecting it and then your ghost just keeps walking down the road not knowing he was dead. But then when you tried to eat something it would just go right through you. And then you'd be like what the hell?”
“That actually kinda makes sense.” Jayden continued to sort through the money, and some bills only had a small amount of red dye on them. “I think I can save some of this money. Why don't you see if you can't catch a couple more fish and we'll have lunch?”
Brody made his way back to the brook which they had been following for a while and he jumped in; he almost immediately grabbed a salmon and threw it out on the ground where the cub tried hard to grab it but it was jumping around pretty good. He grabbed two more and threw them out as well where they flopped around. Jayden couldn't believe how good he was at catching fish with his bare hands, a bit of a genius at it he thought. Everyone had a talent and he guessed that he had finally discovered his. He got out of the water and cut the heads off the fish before cleaning them. Then he gathered some old branches and started a fire. “So how much good money do we have?”
The bear cub backed away from the fire and remained quite a distance from it as he commenced to eat his fish. It was definitely not impressed with that fire.
Jayden smiled. “Not that much. Your share was completely destroyed by the dye.”
“Damn it. Of all the luck.”
Suddenly a huge black bear appeared and stood up on two legs as it showed an aggressive stance. They both ran screaming and climbed a nearby tree as fast as they could. The bear made its way over and commenced to eat their fish.
“Jayden, is that the bear's mother?”
“No.”
“How do you know?” Brody asked. He was having a difficult keeping himself from falling out of the tree.
Jayden stared down at the big black bear. “Because the cub is scared of it. Look.” The cub backed up and then ran off. “He wouldn't be scared of his own mother now would he?”
“Is that a male bear?”
Jayden stared down at the big bear. “I don't know I can't see his wiener from here.”
Brody thought about that. “How come that bear isn't scared of the fire?”
“Maybe he's insane from the lack of food. Notice how he's limping; his right paw is hurt.”
“Jayden, you do know that bears can climb trees.”
“I know I panicked. They can also run faster than people.”
Brody imagined the bear eating the both of them. “Do you think it hurts to get eaten by a bear?”
Jayden's grip on the tree was hurting his hand something awful; he didn't know how much longer he could hold on. “Of course it would hurt to be eaten alive. Give your head a shake.”
Brody shook his head. “If he eats me I hope I give him diarrhea. I'm just saying.”
Jayden shook his head. “That'll teach him.”
“Jayden, I think I'm gonna fall!”
Chapter Twelve
THE BIG DOG BURST OUT OF THE WOODS making them all scream because they thought it was a wolf, luckily it was just a German shepherd named Tessy in pursuit of a rabbit, relief washed over all of their faces as they realized that they weren't going to be
eaten. It was a great feeling having escaped what appeared to be certain death. The dog wasn't at all interested in them. Now the boys could hear the female's master calling her in the distance. “Tessy, get back here! Tessy!” The man and his dog had been walking on the trail when the shepherd had picked up the scent of the rabbit and the dog's nature took over, the hunt was on. In the end the rabbit had managed a narrow escape.
“That is one scary dog,” said Jake. “I thought it was gonna take a bite out of my ass. I thought it was a wolf.”
“I thought it was a wolf too. I thought we were all goners,” said Randy. “Boy, that'll wake you up fast.”
They geared up, put on their backpacks and helped Randy get comfortable on the lawn chair that they had covered in black tape for comfort and durability. The four were excited to get back to the saucer, with Randy not knowing what to expect. He sure didn't like being totally reliant on the others to carry him around but it was either that or don't go, and he had to admit that he was excited. Being stuck in that stupid chair all the time could get boring. In fact he hadn't been this excited in a long time. He hoped that a police helicopter wouldn't have to be sent in to carry him out; he could imagine lots of bad things happening but he would try hard not to think about it and to have some fun.
Across the road at Harold's house, the three had stayed up all night playing checkers, trying to keep an eye on Sam and the others through the window. Rolland stood up and looked out the dirty streaked window. “Guys, they're already getting up and it's like five in the morning. What the hell are they up to?”
“Come on,” said Harold. “Let's go find out.”
“I'm tired,” said Rolland.
“You can rest when you're dead. Come on.” Timothy was anxious to know what they were up to; maybe they had a tree house in the woods. It would be fun to burn it down.
Sam and Michael had carried Randy about a mile down the forest path when they decided to take their first break. The scent of the forest was fresh and inviting. It was a delightful morning in the woods, mild and sunny with different birds welcoming the new day in song. Chickadees flew from tree to tree singing, “Chick-a-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee.”
The Saucer Club Page 5
