by Bijou Hunter
Goldie hates her little brother and screams whenever I get near the baby. Worse still, Boone has something called colic and screams whenever awake. With the kids’ screaming so much, no one can hear me freaking out too.
Before we lose our sanity, Blackjack calls in reinforcements. Grandma Barbra arrives to care for Boone. She bounces him like a football, and he stops crying. I don’t know why he likes that position, and I’m too tired to care. I just need him to be happy because he’s beautiful and I want to hold him without also wanting to yank out my hair.
The crew takes Goldie on outings whenever possible. They walk with her outside or play in the pool. The crew also babysits Boone once he feels better. That way, Goldie and I can enjoy alone time. Blackjack organizes everyone’s help, showing why he’s a great club VP.
“Bossing people around comes easily,” he says and gives me a wink when I compliment him one night.
Sometimes, I think about Blackjack and wonder if our life is real. Back in the dark room, I had strange dreams that felt so real. Is my life with Blackjack and our kids too good to be real?
Then I remind myself of all the details of my life that I could never have dreamed up. I didn’t know about painted elephants or swimming pools or zombies or having a family. No, I lack the imagination to create a world with so many amazing—and frustrating—moving parts.
That means I got lucky when a woman and her friends killed my father and dragged me out of the darkness and into a life where a man like Blackjack was waiting.
➸ Blackjack ★
Yarrow goes through three obstetricians before we find one that’ll schedule a C-section from the get-go. Cayenne is certain Yarrow can’t handle delivering naturally. She claims an epidural alone will leave a lot of people vulnerable to my woman’s biting reflex. The third doctor listens to our situation and agrees immediately. No doubt he’s more frightened of me than Yarrow. People in Rawlins lack imagination.
Yarrow’s pregnancy goes almost too smoothly. I’m a negative fucker and wait for something bad to happen. Nothing does. Yarrow doesn’t even seem too bothered by her recovery from the C-section. All she wants is to stare at our baby and fuck me. Unfortunately, she needs to wait awhile for sex, but we do spend much of our days simply basking in the beauty of the child we made together.
Goldie is the spitting image of me as a toddler, but people still say she’s a little Yarrow. She does have her mother’s big eyes, though they’re brown like mine.
Laughing easily, Goldie wants to touch everything. She’ll eat any food and loves going fast. No doubt one day she’ll be a speed demon like me.
My darling princess can’t stand her brother, Boone, when he comes along. I try to help her see the best in having a sibling, but she hates the kid. Stubborn like her mother, Goldie refuses to acknowledge him once she realized we’re not sending Boone back to the hospital. I hope she’ll mellow out once he’s crawling and less of a blob. Instead, she gets even more invested in pretending he doesn’t exist while also attempting to dress Oyster in Boone’s baby clothes.
Finally, Ginger suggests we tell Goldie that she can’t play with her brother. Every time they’re close to each other, we ought to separate them and insist Goldie stay away from him.
Two days after we start, Goldie tells us that Boone is her baby now. I swear nothing makes our kids want to do something more than telling them it’s off-limits. Despite their age differences, the kids are like twins. They both look like me. They’re both painfully stubborn. And they both love speed.
“Roller coasters are stupid,” Yarrow says when the kids try to get her to join them at the carnival.
The kids know not to mess with their mother when she says she doesn’t want to do something. As stubborn as they are, they’ve got nothing on Yarrow.
I’m the easygoing parent, meaning I get railroaded into doing crap I hate. Every time a carnival comes anywhere near Rawlins, the kids beg to go. I always swear we’ll give each ride only a few tries.
Then an hour passes, and I’m ready to puke while my kids beg for more.
“Uncle Camo will take them,” Yarrow announces.
And he does. Again and again and again until they’re begging to go home and he wants to ride a few more times.
“That’s why family is good to have around,” Yarrow tells me that night.
The crew grows gradually, taking in brothers with something to offer rather than caring only about increasing our numbers. Oz runs a tight ship, and I always have his back. I still think the fucker got handed too many lucky strikes over the years, but that resentment is my problem, not his. I see him as family now. If something happened to me, I know without a fucking doubt he would protect Yarrow and the kids.
We’re safe in Rawlins, though. Once former Deputy Douchebagasaurus Rex takes a deal with a six-month stint in prison, the other cops realize where they stand in the local food chain. The law keeps their distance, and we spill the blood of any assholes who mess with our territory. Oz and Ginger prove to be a powerful team, and the club grows in ways Cell could never have imagined.
Despite my current surplus of good luck, my most important dreams revolve around Yarrow and our babies. Every other blessing is icing on top of the cupcakes my woman loves eating.
About Bijou
Living in Indiana with my three sweet sons, three wacky cats, one super mom (and her ugly dog), I love cats, 1970s and 1980s music, Call of Duty, and sitcoms canceled before their time.
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