“You okay?” Jay asked, following him.
“I’m good. Tell Flint I’ll meet you all over there.”
“Will do,” he said, but Jay was still giving him a curious look.
“Tanner?” Macy, small voice and waterlogged eyes, stood behind him.
He didn’t know what else to do, so he opened his arms. She poured herself against him, heaving sobs racking her slim frame. For a long time he rubbed her back and told her it would be okay. He didn’t know how, but it would be okay.
“I don’t know what to do for him. He’s just broken and so hurt, and I don’t know what happened. I wish Grant and I had talked more. If we had, maybe I would have known what was going on. I would have known if they were having problems in their marriage, or if they had a bad night, and Colby felt guilty. I would know how to fix this. I should know how.”
“Now that he’s started opening up, it’s only a matter of time before it all comes out, Macy. And we can pray. For him. For you to know how to help. And for the staff here.”
“Yes, I know. I get so caught up in the pain, and I just want to dig our way out of this.”
“Understandable.”
She leaned into him and sighed. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” He led her toward his truck. “Want to ride along with me?”
“I would like that. I think I can’t be here much longer. Eleanor is going to help Colby calm down and put him to bed.”
“Let’s go. After we get done, I’ll take you to dinner.”
They were pulling up the drive of the Triple C when Macy’s phone rang. Tanner glanced her way as he negotiated the driveway and then the narrow lane that led to the barn.
“Chloe? What’s wrong?” She bit down on her lip and avoided looking at Tanner.
Chloe was practically shouting. “He was with another woman. Macy, they were holding hands.” Tanner didn’t think he heard every word, but he got the gist of it.
“But he invited you?”
“The note wasn’t from him. I think I knew that, but I wanted...” The rest was garbled. Tanner clenched the steering wheel and waited for someone to tell him what was going on.
“Oh, honey, I’m so sorry. What can I do?” Macy held the phone tight as if she knew he was tempted to take it. He parked and waited for someone to include him.
He could hear his sister talking. He heard the word note. And over. Macy looked everywhere but at him.
“I’m here. If you want to stay the night at my place tonight, you can.” She cleared her throat. “You should call Tanner and tell him.”
He grumbled about that being a sweet idea.
“No, he’ll say he loves you.” Macy smiled at him. “And then he’ll threaten to go beat Russell within an inch of his life.”
Another pause, and then Macy spoke again.
“Yes, he is.” And she handed him the phone.
He took it, his hand brushing Macy’s in the process. He’d been in control for years. A carefully ordered and structured life, the antithesis of what his parents had provided them. And in a matter of weeks, two females and a boy had turned his life topsy-turvy.
He was okay with that. That was the part that really stunned him.
Chapter Fifteen
A cool wind blew, reminding everyone that it was fall, even though they’d had summerlike temperatures for the past week. It was close to the end of October. In less than a week the boys would be sleeping at the Triple C.
Macy had volunteered to help paint one of the new wings, and Chloe had joined her. Josie Markham was there also, but they wouldn’t allow her to help paint. She brought water from time to time and then left again. The surprise helper was Jay Maxwell. When he arrived, bringing a sandwich for himself and Chloe, Macy made a point not to ask questions.
“How is Colby doing?” Chloe asked as she dipped the roller in paint and swiped it down the wall.
“He’s better. He’s still not really talking. I just know he blames himself for his parents’ deaths. He was doing so well, and we were planning what it would be like when we got home, and now he won’t talk about it.”
Jay set his paintbrush down on the shelf of the ladder and descended to grab a bottle of water. “This happens, Macy. He does want to come home, but there is a fear of not being able to handle it. He probably can’t vocalize that at his age, but it happens to older children. The great ‘what if’ factor. They’ve been doing so well, but what if when they get home they can’t continue their recovery? What if they revert to old behaviors?”
“Eleanor is working with him, trying to get him to confront those fears. We’re hoping his trip home this weekend will help.”
“And don’t be too hard on yourself if there are rough spots.” Jay climbed back up the ladder and continued painting.
Macy happened to glance at Chloe and saw the other woman watching him. Interesting. They were finishing up for the day when they heard a commotion from downstairs. Jay stored the paint in the closet and took the brushes to clean.
“That sounds like a woman on the warpath. I’m taking the chicken’s way out and using the back door,” Jay said as he stepped back into the room. Chloe joined him and the two left.
Josie glanced at Macy. “That leaves the two of us. Should we escape, too?”
They could hear raised voices.
Macy shook her head. “I want to see this.”
They walked into the living room to see Avery Culpepper confronting Gabriel and Bea. The younger woman, in her 1970s version of country, was wearing big sunglasses, and her brass hair was pulled back with a headband.
“Miss Culpepper, I assure you, no one is trying to take away what is rightfully yours. And your grandfather was not an elderly man coerced into giving over his property,” Bea soothed, but the tone didn’t match the spark in her eyes.
“I don’t know why you expect me to believe that. Here I am, his granddaughter, and I’m getting nothing but the runaround and questions about my identity. And you all are getting this house and hundreds of acres. For a boys ranch! And I know what the lawyer Mr. Phillips thinks of you all abandoning the ranch that his family donated. He isn’t too happy about it.”
Gabriel stepped forward. “Miss Culpepper, we’re not abandoning the Silver Star. There are uses for both properties.”
“Yeah, bringing in ruffians to thieve and vandalize.” She flipped her hair over her shoulder. “I have to go, but I can guarantee you, this isn’t over.”
Gabriel motioned her toward the door. “Might I remind you that when this is over, if you stay here, these people will be your neighbors. So you might want to be careful how you treat people.”
She flounced—that was the only word to describe it—out of the house. From the window they watched as she got in her convertible and sped off.
“Well, that was interesting.” Josie stepped away from the window. “She does make an entrance. And an exit.”
“I wish she would exit the whole area,” Gabriel said.
Bea hushed him. “We’ll get through this. The law is on our side. And, Macy, you are the person I came here looking for.”
“Is Colby okay?”
Bea nodded and motioned for her to follow. “He is. As a matter of fact, we had a good conversation today, and there are some things you should know.”
Her heart sank, but she followed Bea, taking some reassurance from the older woman’s smile.
Bea led her to the kitchen. They still had some painting and cleaning to do, but the room was big and bright. It would serve the boys well.
“Sit down.” Bea motioned to a step stool, and she grabbed one for herself, first putting the paint can on it down on the floor. “It’s hard to believe we’re days away from moving in here. But I’ve learned in life to not sweat the small stuf
f. What looks like a mountain in the distance is often just a bump in the road.”
Macy sat and waited. She felt a little like she had in school when sent to the principal’s office.
“Stop looking so worried,” Bea ordered in a sweet but firm voice.
“But I am worried.” So bothered that her hands trembled, and she clasped them together.
“Okay. I want you to know this because Colby is coming home this weekend for a pass. And it is not going to be easy for him, now that we’ve dredged up the past. Most specifically the night of his parents’ accident.”
Her heart trembled along with her hands. “Okay.”
“Macy, they had a fight, before the babysitter got there. I don’t think it was the end of the world, but to Colby it was. His mom was mad at him because he didn’t want them to go out. She was mad at your brother, too. She said sometimes she wished she could just go away. It was probably one of those things a mom might say without thinking. But in this case, Colby’s mom was mad, and she didn’t come back. And then your fiancé, Bill, left.”
“With the parting message that he didn’t sign on to raise a kid.”
“The two situations were just too much for a little guy to process.”
Macy put a hand over her face and shook her head. Her poor little boy. “So how do I help him?”
“Love him. Be his mom. Let him talk. When he’s afraid, don’t discount his fear, just talk openly and honestly.”
“I do love him, Bea. Sometimes I worry that I won’t be able to help him.”
“You’re helping him. Being there for him is the way to help move him forward.”
“Thank you, Bea. For everything you do for Colby and for the other boys.”
“I love these kids, Macy. And their parents. That includes you.”
She was a parent. Colby’s parent. She reminded herself of that as she walked out the front door a short time later. She hoped she didn’t let him down.
As she pulled her keys out of her purse, she became aware of someone standing on the porch. “Tanner.”
* * *
“I’ve been waiting for you. I wanted to see if I could fix you dinner.” He stepped out of the shadows, wanting to see for himself that she was okay.
“I...” She closed her eyes, took a deep breath and nodded. “I would love that.”
“I thought you might not want to be alone.”
She took his hand and he led her down the steps. “I would love for life to be less complicated. Just for a week or two.”
He opened her car door for her. “It will be. And in the meantime, you’re still moving forward.”
“I am still moving forward,” she agreed.
Instead of Tanner cooking, they stopped on their way back to town and took a pizza to Macy’s. He parked his truck behind her car and followed her inside. The house had changed. Gone were the dark pictures on the walls. She’d replaced them with brighter colors. It was starting to feel like her home.
“Do you like it?” she asked.
“I do. It fits you.”
He eyed the tubs and boxes. “Things you’re getting rid of?”
“Yes. It’s been difficult. I still have a drawer or two in their dresser that I just can’t bring myself to open and look through. It feels too personal.”
They walked into the kitchen, and she flipped on a light. Somewhere in the house he could hear the puppy barking. “Do you want me to let the puppy out?”
“Please. I have him kenneled in the spare room. Down the hall on the left.”
He returned a few minutes later. “I put the puppy in the backyard. And, Macy, if you want help sorting through things, I can do that.”
“I know. And thank you. My mom is coming up in a few days. She said it is to see the new ranch and to help Colby with the transition back home. I think she’s coming to see if she can talk me into bringing her grandson to live near her.”
He opened the pizza box and took the plates she handed him. It wasn’t the first time she’d mentioned Arizona. He had brushed it off, thinking it was just out of frustration, but saying it twice told him it meant something.
“Don’t look at me like that,” she said as she reached into the cabinet for glasses.
“Like what?”
“Like a storm cloud about to erupt.” She poured him a glass of tea and then got herself water. She didn’t ask, he noticed; she just knew.
And that troubled him, that she knew him so well, but she was thinking about leaving.
“I’m not erupting. I’m just hoping you don’t go. I don’t want you to go.”
She opened the pizza box and put a slice on each of their plates. “I don’t know what I want.”
That didn’t sound promising to a man who thought he’d like to be a bigger part of a woman’s life.
“I don’t mean it like that,” she said. “I don’t know, Tanner. I know what I want, but I’m afraid of what will happen. I’m afraid for Colby and myself. I’m afraid that I’ll fail. I never planned to put myself in Cynthia’s shoes. Even though we had discussed that they wanted to make me his guardian, I hadn’t considered the reality of it. It wasn’t supposed to happen this way. A guardian is a ‘just in case.’ And in this case, they had also considered the Wayes. And I wonder if they’d meant to change the will, to make them Colby’s guardians.”
“It’s no use second-guessing the situation. You are Colby’s guardian.”
She leaned in close. “And I want to be his guardian.”
“Life is messy,” Tanner said. He picked up a napkin and wiped her chin. “And so are you.”
She laughed and took the napkin from his hand. “I am a mess.”
“Yes, but I kind of like the mess.”
She pulled back and smiled up at him. “I kind of doubt that. I see you as a man who likes everything in its place. I’m chaos, at best.”
“Chaos can be good.” He leaned over, cupping her cheek in his hand as he lightly touched his lips to hers. The kiss was easy and sweet. He pulled back. “Yes, I like chaos. More than I ever dreamed possible.”
His lips lingered over hers, and he pulled her close. They ended up standing, her arms around his neck as he held her.
He didn’t want to let her go. He wanted to convince her to give them a chance. But he also knew that she had to make her own decisions. As much as he’d like to sway her to stay, she would do what was best for her and Colby.
He’d never seen himself as the dramatic sort, but he kind of thought that their kiss felt like a goodbye.
Chapter Sixteen
Colby walked through the front door of the house on Friday afternoon, his overnight bag in his hand and an apprehensive look tugging at his mouth. When he saw his grandmother, he lost a little bit of that look and ran to her, letting her grab him up in a hug.
“Why, Colby, I think you’ve grown!” She held him up for inspection. “Yes, definitely a guy that could hike the Grand Canyon with me.”
“Mom!”
Nora Lockwood smiled at her daughter. “Macy, I meant for a vacation.”
“Thank you.”
“But I did bring Colby a gift from Dr. Lockwood.” Nora spun Colby around again.
“You mean Granddad,” Colby chided her. “That’s what he likes to be called.”
“Yes, Granddad.”
But Macy’s mom liked being a doctor’s wife and so she often referred to William by his title. Dr. Lockwood.
“Oh, Macy, the title to the car.”
Macy had forgotten. The minivan that had been Cynthia’s. Her mom planned on selling it, and Macy had forgotten to look for the title.
“I think I know where it is.” The drawer she hadn’t wanted to deal with.
“Why don’t you look while you’re t
hinking about it? Colby and I have to plan a Grand vacation.”
“Love the play on words, Mom.” Macy kissed her mother’s cheek and hugged Colby. “When you’re done with the vacation planning, why don’t you let Colby show you his room? We’ve been redecorating.”
“I see that in the living room. Very colorful.”
“Yes, I like color.”
As she walked away, she heard Colby telling his grandmother about the new ranch. They were beginning the moving process. His cabin was being transitioned that weekend. But he wouldn’t be there, because he was at home on a pass.
He sounded okay. She took a deep breath and prayed he would continue to move forward.
She headed to the back of the house and the bedroom she’d tried to avoid. In the top drawer of the dresser were papers she really needed to go through. She had to. And why not now?
There were bank papers, receipts. As she dug through, she found the car title. Simple. Easy. She should have done it months ago. She just hadn’t wanted to do this. It seemed too final.
She started to put everything back, and she found a typed letter. She opened it and sat back to read. And reread.
The letter was typed on letterhead from Grant’s office at school. There was no signature. But the desires of her brother and his wife were clear. Macy folded the letter and left the room. As she walked through the kitchen, she handed her mom the title of the car, and she grabbed her purse.
“Where are you going?”
“To town. I have to go to town.” She shoved the letter in her purse.
“You can’t just leave.” Her mom stood, leaving Colby on the sofa, staring at the book on the Grand Canyon, his eyes big and luminous.
“Mom, I’m going to town.” She gave a pointed look at the little boy. “I’ll be right back. I’m not upset with anyone.”
“Don’t go, Aunt Macy.”
She kneeled in front of her nephew. “Colby, when people leave, they also come back.”
“Sometimes they don’t,” he whimpered.
“Of course they do. I’m coming back. Most important of all, I’m not upset with you or Grandma. I am a little upset about something I read, but that isn’t your fault. You see, sometimes people are upset and say things, but they’re not as mad as their words sound.”
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