by Koboah, A D
I placed my hand on my stomach on the spot from which the pull seemed to originate and all I could think about was the story in Genesis that Miss Emily had read to us one evening. The story of God taking one of Adam’s ribs and using it to create Eve, a woman for him to love. I knew I was half mad with longing and lack of sleep but that pull seemed to make perfect sense when I thought of that story because I was sure that it was exactly what Eve would have felt if she had been separated from Adam. She had been made from him. A part of him had formed the core of who she was. She was bonded to him irrevocably and there was nothing on this Earth that could ever have broken that bond. Only God, and if He had ever chosen to do so, she would have ceased to exist.
I had to find him. Being here, being anywhere without him, was intolerable. I had to find him or die.
He had told me I had a powerful mind and Mama Akosua had said that I would have been a powerful seer if I had nurtured those gifts. I had always been able to feel his presence whenever he was near so maybe if I concentrated I could reach him, just as Mama had been able to reach me when she’d needed to.
I closed my eyes and tried to focus. I tried to remember the force that always emanated from him, tried to hone in on it so I could maybe speak to him as Mama had spoken to me. I concentrated on him with all my being and for a while there was nothing, only my pain and desolation.
And then I perceived what I can only describe as a spark, like a match flaring in the dark. It went out almost as quickly as it had come but I opened my eyes and looked out toward the trees at the back of the house.
He was somewhere in that direction. I didn’t know how far or if it was close enough for me to reach, but I had to try.
I got up and began to walk.
It took roughly three hours in the relentless heat to get to my destination. I hadn’t thought to bring any food or water with me and had only taken Avery’s jacket, which I clutched to my chest the entire time. Luckily, I came across a small stream on my way and was able to gulp down a few mouthfuls of water. The whole time that I was trudging through the woods, I asked myself if I had lost my mind. I was half delirious from the heat and hunger, so maybe I was only imagining that I could sense where he was. But the thought of going back to the mansion and waiting until dusk only to spend the night alone again quickened my steps.
It seemed as if the spark I had seen and felt was getting stronger and the pull that had tormented me so began to loosen and then disappeared altogether. Finally I began to feel the force he generated, faint at first, and then stronger, until my senses were engulfed with the sound of that sweet lullaby drawing me ever closer to him.
At last, I emerged from the trees to a still, clear blue lake glistening in the light of the afternoon sun.
I smiled, probably for the first time in nearly two days and relief, so strong and so sweet, filled me. He was here under the water somewhere.
I walked to the edge of the lake, took off my shoes and waded into the cool water up to my knees, not caring that I got my dress wet. He was here. I had found him at last. Letting out a shaky breath, I waded out of the water and sat down on the grass.
The feverishness I had felt was gone now and the burning in my brain was nowhere near as intense as it had been.
I lay down on my side still clutching his jacket to my chest. He was here; I had found him. He was bound to see me waiting for him when he came out of the water at dusk and I could only hope he wouldn’t be cruel enough to leave me here on my own.
I thought about everything I had felt over the last two days and finally decided to say aloud that dreaded word: “Love.”
I had fallen in love with Avery, fallen fast and hard. I couldn’t even pinpoint how or when it had happened as it seemed as if it had always been there, waiting for a moment to show itself. I had spent my whole life trying not to form strong attachments to anyone and yet here I was, hopelessly and desperately in love with someone who, by his own admission, was a walking aberration.
Yes, I was in love.
I thought about using the time I had before the sun went down to try and find a way to shield my thoughts from him. But I was too tired to even try. When he came out of the water at dusk, he would find me here, look into my mind and know what I felt for him. That thought gave me a certain amount of peace because what I felt was too strong a burden to carry on my own.
It was a burden I would happily share with him because once he saw everything I had suffered over the last few days, he would never leave me. And I knew now that I would follow him to the ends of the Earth for as long as he allowed me to.
With that last thought, and knowing that he was only a short distance away, I fell into an exhausted sleep, probably the deepest sleep I had ever had in my life.
Chapter Fifteen
I was standing outside the chapel under storm clouds so thick and black that almost all the daylight had been frightened away. But this wasn’t the burnt ruin in which I had so often sought refuge. It was the chapel of the past, a glorious white mass looming out of the shadows cast by heavy black and purple clouds.
Even from this distance, I could feel an aura of evil surrounding the chapel that was as pervasive and noxious as the black smoke that must have billowed from it when it was set alight. This is what others sensed here, the thing that kept them away. I knew this even though I was in a dream. I also knew that, although I had picked up this evil on a subconscious level during my many visits here, something else had drawn me, something that had made me feel safe and comforted whenever I was there. Avery.
Somehow, I had sensed his past connection to this place long before he came into my life, and I was beginning to see that we were tied to each other in a way that neither of us could hope to understand.
Although the evil swathing the chapel sent fear shooting through my mind, I knew I had to go inside. So I walked steadily to the door and stepped into the cool, bright interior.
The inside was just as beautiful as the outside. The polished wooden pews, whitewashed walls, and the warm glow cast by the stained glass windows were a far cry from the carnage of burned wood, blackened walls, and gaping holes where the windows should have been. But none of those things mattered, for I could see a man standing at the altar with his back to me.
I ran down the aisle toward him, every fibre in my body coming alive and when Avery turned around in response to the sound of my footsteps, I almost wept with joy.
“Avery? Avery! Thank the Lord!”
A slow smile passed over his lips, one that was somewhat furtive and totally unlike the open, simple smiles I was used to seeing from him. But I didn’t care. I ran into his arms even though everything around me screamed of danger and a dark, soulless yearning.
“Avery, I’s scared I wasn’t never gonna see you again.”
“Hm. Yes, I have missed you too, can you not tell?”
He had his arms around my waist, crushing me to him, and I was shocked to feel his rigid manhood pressing against my stomach.
Desire flared within me and I grew weak in his arms, especially when he began to trail a line of soft kisses down my neck. And yet there was something horribly wrong. I knew this but now that I had found Avery again, nothing was going to tear me away from him.
Pulling my head back by my hair, he gazed down at me, his eyes hard like blue steel.
“Kiss me,” he demanded.
I was slightly confused by the change in him, the mean edge in his voice that was so unlike the Avery I had fallen in love with. But my desire for him burned out of control and I pulled his head down and kissed him, entwining my fingers in his hair as I searched his mouth with my tongue. He met my passion with his own, crushing his lips to mine as he lowered me to the floor. I was on fire and reason deserted me along with any sense of propriety I might have had about what we were doing and where. Weak with lust, I could only cling to him as he loosened the top half of my dress and began to explore my bare skin, his cool touch agitating the heat of my desire rather than sla
king it. When his mouth left mine and moved down to my breast, I writhed and moaned beneath him like a woman possessed as his hand reached under my skirt and up to my thigh.
When his teeth clamped down a little too vigorously on my nipple, I gasped and would have tried to pull away if his fingers hadn’t at that moment reached the warm darkness between my thighs that was aching for his touch. I arched my back as he stroked it, completely enthralled by the fire that raged within as he brought his head up to mine once more.
At first all I saw was blond hair obscuring his face but when I brushed the hair away to look into his eyes, they weren’t the shade of blue I was expecting to see.
I went rigid with fear as I stared into the face I hated, and when Master John smiled, I saw that his teeth were as long and sharp as Avery’s when he was ready to kill.
To my horror the fire within me continued to rage and I threw my head back in wild abandon as Master John entered me, a cry of triumphant pleasure escaping me as his teeth tore into my neck.
Completely lost, I continued to writhe beneath him as he drank my blood, abandoning myself to desire as death slowly consumed me.
I woke up stifling a scream. I was lying in the lamplit red velvet bedroom and it was dark outside.
Even though I was wide awake, the dream continued to lie on me like packed earth. I found myself unable to move for a few moments as I pondered its significance and whether it was some sort of warning. But the cloying uneasiness it had induced was nothing compared to the raw panic I was faced with when I realised I was once more alone at the mansion.
Avery must have brought me back and left again. To make things worse his jacket, which I had carried with me and held onto like my life depended on it, wasn’t in my hands. Tears began to gather as I contemplated another night in the mansion without Avery.
“Luna.”
I sat up, my heart leaping with joy at the sound of the voice, that voice, coming from the direction of the half open door.
“Avery?”
His poked his head around the door, and looked more than a little bit nervous.
“Please, Luna. Do not start shouting until I have had a chance to speak to you.”
“I ain’t gonna shout. Just get in here.”
He emerged fully from behind the door, brow slightly furrowed. Then he took a hesitant step forward and another until he got to the foot of the bed, where he stood gazing down at me. I remained silent, trying not to embarrass myself with the tears that desperately wanted to show themselves.
“Are you well, Luna? You look a little bit peaky this evening,” he said after a few awkward moments.
“I’s fine. It’s the heat, that’s all,” I said quickly and then looked down and chewed my bottom lip as I knew he could no doubt see how much of a lie that was.
After studying me for a few more moments, he sat down gingerly on the end of the bed.
“You really are not going to start shouting at me?”
I shook my head.
He smiled timidly.
“Right then. So tell me, what are you thinking?” He said this with an almost childlike air of excitement.
The tears that had been threatening to overwhelm me disappeared almost as quickly as I had seen him vanish in the past.
“Is you...mocking me?” I said, using the same word he would have used. “You done left me on my own for nearly two nights and now come walking in here so’s you can mock me?”
The smile left his face immediately and he looked at me, eyes wide.
“Oh no, I promise, Luna. I do not mock you. I do not know what you are thinking.” He waited for the words to sink in and the smile reappeared. “That is why I stayed away. So I could learn to close your thoughts off from my mind.”
I gaped at him and swiftly felt complete and utter hopelessness.
“You don’t know what I’s thinking?” I asked. You don’t know that I love you?
He shook his head in delight. “No, Luna.”
He stood up abruptly then and started gesturing excitedly as he spoke.
“You see, when I realised the magnitude of what I had done, I knew I could not come back unless I found a way to correct my error. So I went into town and practiced blocking off the thoughts of those I came across. And I did it, Luna.”
“So you can never see in my mind again?”
“I can if I choose to. I cannot explain exactly how it is done but it is like gazing out of a window. I can turn away from the view if I want to but it will always be there. Of course I have to concentrate on looking away, so please, try not to tire my patience as much as you used to.”
He smiled gently down at me and although my heart was breaking, it was hard not to respond to that smile.
“Well, I can’t promise nothing. But I’s gonna try.”
He became serious again.
“I hope you know how sorry I am, Luna. I promise I will never invade your mind like that again.”
I could only wave away his apology as I was too upset to speak.
“I must say I was exceedingly surprised to find you by the lake when I woke up today. How did you know where to find me?”
I shrugged and looked away. “I just knowed where to go.”
“Remarkable. You never cease to amaze me. And I think I’m beginning to understand why I saw your face so many years ago. You see, I think you were meant to save me, Luna.”
“Save you. How?”
He sat back down on the bed and gave me the softest, sweetest smile.
“Well, when I left here a few nights ago, I could not stop thinking about what you said to me about killing and I was filled with anguish because, like the mindreading, I have always believed it was something I could not control. Then I began thinking about the night in your cabin when I was about to kill your old Master, and I remembered that I was able to stop feeding on him when I saw your horror and revulsion. I have never been able to do that before, stop in the middle of a kill. But I realised that if I could stop then, because of you, then I might be able to do it again.
“So that night, as I fed, I envisioned your reaction and I was able to stop before I completely drained my victim.”
He appeared sad for a few moments. “It was a big accomplishment, but I fear I may still have killed him as he was very weak when I left. But the following night I was able to succeed in drinking enough to sustain me but not enough that my victim would be harmed. Can you imagine how I felt when I let him go his way without any memory of what I had done and with the simple command to hide the bite marks until they were healed?
“The fact that I still drink blood to survive will no doubt always be repulsive to you, but do you understand what it means to be able to do so and not kill? I have been tormented by the souls of the lives I have taken over the past fifty years and you do not know the joy, the peace that comes with the knowledge that I will never have to kill again.”
I smiled. The relief and joy he felt was obvious. He looked lighter somehow, and for the first time he appeared to be at ease with himself. He wasn’t fidgeting or pulling at his shirt collar as he did so often.
“I may not understand exactly how I saw your face the night I died or why I continued to see it over the years, but there is one thing I am certain of, Luna. You were meant to save me. Only you could save me from an eternity of torment. Only you, beautiful Luna.”
“Avery, I...I wants you to know that what you seen in my head, that ain’t how I sees you. You shoulda stayed long enough to see the rest or so’s I could explain it to you when I quit being mad.”
“You...you do not need to explain anything to me, Luna. I only hope that you will be able to truly forgive me in your heart for my transgressions.”
“I already has, Avery.”
We sat in silence for a few moments in which he gazed at me thoughtfully. But he seemed a lot more confused than usual.
“Do you know, Luna, I am only just noticing how expressive your face is. Your eyes alone can say a thousand words w
ith a mere glance. Reading your expression is like putting together the pieces of a complicated puzzle, and I think I have the answer to the one I see now.”
He continued staring at me but for all his words it seemed as if he didn’t have the answer to the puzzle. Then he brightened and that wondering smile appeared again.
“You...you are looking at me as if you wished I would stop talking and leave you by yourself in peace.”
I sighed inwardly knowing that this was going to get very tedious, very quickly. But he was here. Avery was here and smiling at me.
“No, Avery,” I said with a faint smile. “In fact, I’s thinking...”
I paused, reluctant to say anything that would ruin the simple pleasure of having him returned to me. But he had to know that he could never leave me like that again. So my next words were said as tenderly as I could manage.
“I’s thinking that it be mighty mean of you to leave like that and for so long.”
“I...I am sorry, Luna. But I could see no other way to mend my trespass apart from staying away until I could learn to never do so again.”
“I understands that,” I said. “But next time you has to go away, you gots to tell me you’s coming back cause...cause—”
“Luna, I would have never done that even if I wanted to. I love you. Not being near you is like dying. You are like air to me, like the water and food that humans need to keep them alive. I would die if I could not be near you.”
I could only stare at him for it was as if, despite his promises, he was still reading my mind and reciting back to me my own thoughts about his absence.
His anguish seemed to deepen.
“I apologise. I should not have spoken so, for I see that I have made you uncomfortable. I have to remember that the love I hold for you is that of an immortal. It is too...too immense...and all-consuming for any woman to be able to bear let alone return in kind, so please forgive me for speaking it out loud to you.”
