by A.W. Hartoin
Helen waited for me outside Lee’s door. She’d washed off the smeared mascara and applied a new thick gloppy coat. Amazing that she could hold her eyelids up.
“How’s he doing?” I asked.
“What do they always say? As well as can be expected.”
“I’m getting more and more familiar with what that looks like. What’s his last name? I don’t remember it.”
“Holtmeyer. Are you ready to go in?” She looked at me with those heavy red-rimmed eyes and I considered calling the whole thing off. If she looked like that, how would Lee look? I wasn’t sure I was up to another grieving spouse. I could pretend my phone rang and I had an emergency. There was always the attack of diarrhea fakeout. I’d used that to great and embarrassing success. Helen would get over my bugging out, but Dad and Dixie wouldn’t. I had to get this interview for them, so I nodded and tried to arrange my face into appropriate lines. I didn’t know what to ask, but then again I rarely did.
Lee Holtmeyer sat in the middle of the sofa staring out of a window. He didn’t acknowledge our entrance or move. He seemed frozen. Every hair on his dark head was in place and his blue oxford was freshly pressed with sharp creases down the sleeves. I would’ve thought he was ready for work, if it weren’t for the look on his face.
“Lee,” Helen said softly. He turned and for a moment I wasn’t sure he saw us, but then he said, “Sorry, I was just thinking.”
“It’s okay. This is Mercy Watts, the girl I told you about. Is it okay?”
“Of course. What do you want to know?” Lee’s face was blank and I wondered if he was on something.
“I’m sorry to bother you. I wouldn’t if it wasn’t necessary,” I said.
“I really loved her you know. I don’t think she understood that. I tried to tell her, but I don’t think she really understood.”
“What makes you say that?”
“I couldn’t say it the way I wanted to, to make her understand.”
“She probably understood more than you know and she loved you.”
“She did love me. She did.” Lee smiled, but it looked like it took a lot of effort.
“Did you ever meet Gavin Flouder?”
“I thought she fired him,” he said.
“She did. Did you meet him?”
“No.”
“Then she hadn’t rehired him?”
“Why would she?”
“I thought maybe the stalker had started up again,” I said.
“No. That was all over. I don’t think she thought about it anymore.”
“So she hadn’t had any problems recently?”
“No. She would’ve told me. Do you know something?”
“Not really. I’m here because Gavin Flouder was a family friend and he died on Sunday.”
Lee leaned forward, his eyes intense. “Do you know what happened?”
“It isn’t clear, but he was murdered. I think it has something to do with Rebecca.”
“Why?”
“He called the church and her cell phone the day of the wedding. Did she mention that to you?”
Lee crossed his arms. “No. Why does it matter?”
“Because he called her from the road and he died shortly after arriving home. Was there anyone at the wedding that you didn’t know? Did anyone look suspicious or out of place?”
“Not at all and I would’ve noticed. It was small, just about seventy people,” he said.
“Seventy-five,” a voice said.
I looked up and saw a man and woman standing beside my chair. I hadn’t heard them come in the room. They stared at me, their mouths pulled down into fierce frowns.
“What?” I leaned back away from them, trying to get some distance. Apparently, they hadn’t heard of personal space.
“There were seventy-five people at the wedding,” said the woman.
“Oh,” I said and turned to Lee. He seemed to shrink in their presence and he avoided meeting my eyes.
Helen stepped up and said, “Mercy, this is Darrell, Lee’s brother, and Rhonda, his mom.”
“It’s Mrs. Holtmeyer, if you don’t mind.” Lee’s mom straightened her lilac blouse, ran her finger along a long string of pearls, and turned her icy gaze on Helen. “Who ate peanuts?”
Helen immediately stepped back and looked at the floor. “I had a sandwich. I’m sorry. I forgot about your allergy.”
“You’ve been told how to behave,” said Mrs. Holtmeyer.
I stepped in front of Helen. “I’m sorry to trouble you at such a time, but — ”
“Then why are you?” Lee’s brother leaned forward, his eyes raking over my breasts. My skin flushed and tightened. I wanted to shrink away, but the Dad in me wouldn’t allow it, so I looked Darrell full in the face. He resembled his brother down to the pressed pleats, but all of Lee’s soft good looks were hard and edgy on Darrell. He leaned farther over me, mere inches from touching me.
I stood up, causing Darrell to jerk backward.
Step off, asshole.
“It’s OK, Darrell. I said she could come,” said Lee. He was back to staring out the window.
“It is not a good time,” said his mother.
“Then I’ll be brief,” I said.
“You don’t take a hint, do you?” said Darrell, leaning in again.
“Neither do you,” I replied. “Now Lee, do you think you’re up to telling me what happened during the reception?”
Mrs. Holtmeyer sat beside Lee and put her hand on his leg. She squeezed his knee until her fingers dug into his leg.
“I feel like I’ve told it a hundred times, Mother. One more won’t make any difference.” Lee glanced at me and removed his mother’s hand. It didn’t go easily.
“We were all at the reception. Dinner was over and she went to the bathroom. At least I think she did. She was gone awhile and I looked for her. Mom said it was time to cut the cake, but nobody knew where she was. Helen went into the bathroom to look for her.” Lee looked at Helen. She bit her lip so hard, I expected blood to gush out.
“She wasn’t in the bathroom,” I said.
“No,” said Helen.
“Obviously she wasn’t in the bathroom. What’s the point of this? We’ve talked to the cops five times already,” said Darrell.
“Go ahead, Lee. She wasn’t in the bathroom and then what?” I said.
“We looked for her and we found her. The end,” said Darrell.
“I asked Lee,” I said.
Lee straightened up on the sofa. “We all started looking for her and somebody suggested we check in the chapel. I thought she might be praying.”
“Did she do that a lot? Go to the chapel alone, I mean?” I asked.
Lee looked back out the window and sighed. “I guess so. I don’t know. She prayed a lot. It calmed her.”
“Who found her?”
“I did. She wasn’t in the chapel, so we went into the crying room.”
“Who’s we?” I asked.
“Me and Darrell.” Lee covered his eyes for a moment. “Rebecca was lying on the floor, but I didn’t think she was dead until I picked her up. She was so heavy and limp. Then everybody was there. I don’t know what happened after that. It’s a blur.”
“You picked her up?” I asked.
“Yes. I remember somebody telling me to put her down. I don’t know who. Was it you, Helen?” asked Lee.
Helen shook her head no.
“It was me,” said Darrell, his face reddened and, for a moment, anguished.
“I loved her so much, so much.” Lee continued looking out the window and I heard Helen crying beside me, but I couldn’t move. It was the first time I’d ever done that, interviewed a mourning spouse, unless you counted Dixie. The moment was bizarre, like being inside a painting, clear and blurry at the same time. I would remember every detail and want to forget it, the way the June sun came through the window, the smell of lemon cleaner in the air. It was all perfect and horrible at the same time.
“I think it’s
time to go,” I said to Helen.
She nodded and followed me to the door.
“About time,” said Darrell.
His mother didn’t say anything. She looked at me like I’d taken a dump on her floor.
Lee didn’t look up when I said goodbye.
Helen leaned on the wall outside the apartment and sucked in a deep breath. I took a spot next to her and said, “I don’t think they liked me very much. Darrell and his mom, I mean.”
“They don’t like anyone,” said Helen.
“Including Rebecca?”
“I think they tolerated her, but Mrs. Holtmeyer was definitely in charge of the wedding and everything else.” Helen wrinkled her nose when she said Mrs. Holtmeyer.
“I’m not crazy about the brother either,” I said. “How was he to Rebecca?”
“Okay, but he treats Lee like he’s disabled or something. They both do.”
“Yeah, I got that,” I said.
“Did this help you at all?”
“Don’t know yet. How long was Rebecca missing?”
“I don’t know. I hadn’t seen her for at least a half hour when Lee asked me to go into the bathroom.”
“Were you there when he found her?”
“No, just Darrell. I was in the chapel when I heard Lee. He was screaming.”
“Did you go in the crying room?”
“No, just to the door. It was horrible. I wish I didn’t see it,” she said, biting her lip again.
“How many people were there?”
“Everybody, I guess, except the kids of course.”
“How did everyone seem?”
“Upset. What do you think?”
“Besides that. Did anyone strike you as acting odd?”
“No, but I was with Lee and Rebecca’s mom.”
“You’ve talked to her mom. Does she have any ideas?”
“No way. I think she’s more shocked than the rest of us. She didn’t even know about the stalker,” she said.
“Why didn’t Rebecca tell her?”
“She thought it would upset her and it’s not like she could do anything about it.”
“What about the rest of the family? What do they think?”
“It’s just her mom, an aunt, and a couple of cousins. They’re clueless too.”
“Could I speak to her mom?” I asked.
“I imagine so, but she’s back in Decatur now. I could call her for you.”
“Never mind. You’re probably right. She’s out of the loop.”
I believed Rebecca’s mom was out of the loop, but it was my innate laziness and fear of another interview like Lee’s that kept me from driving the two and a half hours to Decatur. It’d already crossed my mind that somebody would have to retrace Gavin’s trip to Lincoln. I’d assumed it’d be Dad, but that was out of the question, so I was back on the front lines.
I grabbed Helen’s arm. “Wait a minute. I forgot something.”
Helen knocked on Lee’s door and Mrs. Holtmeyer opened it a couple of inches. The chain was on.
“What do you want now?”
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I forgot to ask Lee something. Could you ask him if he or Rebecca went to Lincoln, Nebraska recently or if she said anything about it in the last few weeks?”
She hesitated, but turned and repeated my question to Lee. She probably figured I wouldn’t leave if she didn’t. She was right. I heard Lee answer no. He’d never been there and Rebecca hadn’t been back since her graduation.
Mrs. Holtmeyer turned back to me with the dump expression on her face again. “No and Lee’s never been there. Don’t bother us again.”
She shut the door in my face.
Helen closed her eyes. “My god, she’s a bitch. I can’t believe Rebecca was going to be her daughter-in-law. What a nightmare.”
“Thanks again and I’ll try not to bother you anymore.”
Unless I did. Me being me, it was likely, but it sounded nice anyway.
I left Helen standing in front of Lee’s building looking miserable and lost. I’d had a taste of how she felt and it was bad. She didn’t know what to do or who to be. It takes a while to move forward without feeling like a strong wind is buffeting your every step. I felt a little like that when I saw Gavin on the gurney, but I had a job to do and Helen didn’t have the benefit of purpose. My purpose just then was to interview Emil Roberts. Maybe I’d get lucky and he’d confess, then I wouldn’t have to go to Lincoln. But the trip was getting more intriguing, like a mini-vacation. With no one to pester me I’d be able to think and maybe start to feel better.
