by Barbara Lohr
“F-Feisty.” Swaying, he could hardly get the word out. “I like that.”
“Get your hands off her.” Brody’s voice cut through the confusion. The man’s attention faltered and she wrenched free. Shouts broke out behind her as she escaped, only this time it wasn’t a food fight in the cafeteria.
Great. Just great. Grown men brawling.
Carolyn couldn’t get out of there fast enough. Finally, she reached the door. The night had turned cold and she pulled her jacket tight. Thank goodness her grandmother’s house was just down the road. Scurrying down Canyon Road in the darkness, she slipped twice but kept going. When Brody called her name in the distance, she picked up speed.
Justine? He’d never mentioned her. She wasn’t a woman to be forgotten. The realization made everything so clear. No way could this thing with Brody be a long distance relationship.
He hadn’t changed. There would always be other women.
And she’d been ready to throw away everything for him. In these last days, she pictured herself living here, close to the grandmother she adored. She loved this city, and the man who’d found himself here. Certainly Santa Fe needed teachers. What a dreamer. How foolish.
Now her thoughts mocked her. She kept running.
When she got to the casita, she missed a step and nearly fell. Taking out a key, she fumbled with the lock. Mama V was out with Howard, thank goodness. Inside, the house was quiet. A cold moon cloaked the room in blue shadows. Ripping off the suede jacket, she stumbled against the coffee table, cracked her shin and fell.
Somewhere along the way, her heart had broken.
Oh, Brody rang the bell again and again. Pounded on the door. She stayed huddled on the floor, arms locked around her throbbing leg. When he finally gave up and things were quiet again, she dragged herself down the hall, slipped out of her clothes and into bed.
“Let him explain,” Mama V said to her the next morning after Carolyn had hiccupped through the whole sad story of the night before.
“Trusting Brody was a mistake. I should have known.” She couldn’t eat and her hands were jittery after two cups of coffee.
Alarm pinched her grandmother’s features. “Sweetheart, how can you be so certain? Of course he’s dated other people.”
“That’s the problem.” She could still see Justine standing there. The self-assured woman was everything she was not. “Old lovers have a way of surfacing. Remember Daddy? Some men are just like this. I don’t want it.”
Brody may have sweet-talked her grandmother, but Carolyn wasn’t having it. She’d seen what he was like in high school. Maybe she’d been too eager to believe he’d changed. Howard offered to drive her to the airport. Certainly not her first choice but her only option. Alan was mentioned but she quickly vetoed that idea.
Rushing around with final packing, she felt miserable. “Can we have this conversation later?” she asked her grandmother. Mama V nodded, her eyes sad.
Howard pulled up in plenty of time to get to the Albuquerque airport. Meanwhile, Brody blew up her phone with calls and texts. He wanted to take her to the airport so they could talk. No way. After texting him that she had a ride, she turned the phone off. Exchanging looks with Mama V, Howard took Carolyn’s suitcase out to his car.
“Talk to you soon.” She hugged her grandmother tight. Coming back to Santa Fe would always be painful now. How she hated that.
“Oh, I feel terrible about this.”
“It’s not your fault.” Carolyn kissed her cheek. “I’ll call you.”
She left Mama V wringing her hands in front of the casita. Howard’s tasteful, and no doubt expensive cologne, permeated the black Mercedes. Carolyn would probably reek of it for a week to come.
Numb with pain, she wished she could have it out with Brody. Throw a few vases and pound on his chest. But that wasn’t her way. She felt stupid for letting this happen. He was Brody Wolf. What had she been thinking?
Soon she’d be able to talk to Diana or Phoebe. More experienced than she was, they’d help her deal with this pain.
“I’m glad I have some time alone with you,” Howard said when they were about halfway to the airport.
The poor guy. She hadn’t said a word since they left Santa Fe. “Sorry, Howard. Guess I’m not very good company today.”
He cleared his throat once. Twice. “I wanted to discuss something with you.”
She shot him a wary glance. His hands wrung the steering wheel. This didn’t look good. “About what, Howard?”
“Your grandmother.” His forehead glistened with perspiration.
“Of course.” Uneasiness spider-stepped down her spine.
“Did your grandmother tell you how we met?”
“No, I don’t think she did.”
Howard licked his lips. “We met in rehab. I’d just had a quintuple bypass and your grandmother, of course, was there for her hip.”
Carolyn had no idea what a quintuple whatever was.
Howard continued. “We were both in a bad way. Neither one of us wanted to be there. I’d lost my wife two years ago and, frankly, things had been downhill since then. Of course, your grandmother still missed her husband.”
Why had Mama V never told her this? Or had Carolyn been too busy with her own world to ask?
“One thing was clear to me. We were both survivors.” They’d reached the outskirts of Albuquerque. “Some patients would drop out of rehab after one or two sessions. They’d give up. That could have been me, except for Vera. She came in like clockwork. In fact, I switched my schedule to be there at the same time. Your grandmother would never admit it, but she was having a hard time. So was I. Rehab wasn’t easy. Still, we did it.”
Her heart twisted. Every time she’d called, Mama V had assured Carolyn she was doing well. Rehabilitation was “a breeze.”
“We’d cheer each other on. Crack jokes.” He threw her a slightly embarrassed smile. “What do they say? The rest is history?”
“Howard, I had no idea.”
“We saved each other, Carolyn. Sometimes I needed a good kick in the behind. And she needed me too.”
She struggled to get her mind around this. “But Mama V always said everything was fine.”
“She didn’t want you to know.” He hurried on, checking the highway signs for the exit. “Anyway. I love your grandmother like I was eighteen again. This might sound weird but I felt I should come to you...”
Her stomach sank. So her grandmother was sick. And of course, she wouldn’t want Carolyn to worry. “Tell me.”
Howard was struggling. “I’d like to ask for her hand in marriage.”
“W-What?” If he had offered to fly Carolyn home on a magic carpet, she couldn’t have been more stunned.
“I want to marry your grandmother. Marriage calls for certain formalities. I want to do right by her. You’re the closest one in her family.” While he took the exit ramp, she began to laugh. What a relief.
Howard looked stricken. “It’s not funny, Carolyn.”
“No, it’s definitely not, Howard. I’m sorry. I’m so relieved.” Just because her own life was a disaster, she didn’t have to project chaos onto everyone else. “Do you know how my grandmother feels about this?”
Traffic became more congested. Howard edged into the lane marked Departures. “No, but I’ll soon find out. That is, if you’re okay with this?”
“Of course I am. I’m touched that you’ve asked. But I have no idea if she wants to marry again.”
“We’re pretty close, Carolyn, your grandmother and me. Oh, she keeps her secrets. Sure, she’s older than I am, but I never let on that I know. And she has to do something about her hearing, although she tries to hide it. I’ll deal with that.” And he chuckled. “All the important pieces are there. We love each other, and we can work out any differences.”
“I don’t feel it’s my place to grant permission, but it’s sweet of you to ask.”
She smiled to herself. Howard was definitely the man for the job. H
er grandmother would probably need a sling for her left arm if she said yes. The engagement ring would be huge.
“Would you like me to take you to your gate?” The poor guy looked so relieved. “It would just take me a minute to park. I could help with your luggage?”
Not too long ago, she’d thought this man was insufferable. But he was really very sweet. “No. Definitely not.” She’d misjudged him.
Disturbing thoughts washed over her. She’d been wrong about Howard. Was she also wrong about Brody?
“So then, you think...”
She’d gotten out of the car and so did Howard. They looked at each other over the roof of the gleaming black Mercedes. He looked uncertain.
“Go for it, Howard. You make my grandmother happy. I’ll handle my mother.”
“Oh, thank you.” A handkerchief had appeared from somewhere, and Howard blotted his brow.
The dry wind must have blown something into her eye. Blinking furiously, she moved to the back of the car. “Now if you could just pop the trunk.”
“Of course, Carolyn. And I hope things work out for you.” Hauling her bag out, Howard said, “You know, Alan thinks the world of you.”
Oh, great. So Alan was her plan B? She choked. One Haynes was more than enough in their family. “Thank you for the ride, Howard.”
Shoulders straightening, he smoothed his navy sport coat. “It was nice getting to know you, Carolyn. I hope you’ll come back soon.” When he tried to shake her hand, she drew him into a quick hug. Howard wasn’t her idea of a hero, but he was for Mama V. That was enough for her.
One quick wave and she swept through the huge glass doors. Her bag bulged with the clothes Diana had sent, and she made tracks for the check-in. The airport was filled with the excited chatter of happy passengers. She wasn’t one of them. No, she was lugging a broken heart heavier than a steamer trunk. When she was halfway to the counter, a tall guy peeled himself from the wall. The broad set of his shoulders sent her heart plummeting. Oh, please God, no. Brody.
Her eyes slid to the counter and back to his advancing figure, His Hotness in jeans and that Stetson. Well, she couldn’t outrun him and scenes weren’t her thing. Stepping aside, she let an older couple go ahead of her.
“Why aren’t you picking up your phone?” He stood there, unshaven with reddened eyes but still heartbreakingly handsome.
This was where she’d run into him, and this was where they’d say goodbye. She’d always liked symmetry. But this moment was the denouement, not that Brody even knew what that was. This was the part of the book where things settle, the falling action. Ignoring the anxiety in her chest at the very thought of anything falling, she straightened.
“Nothing to say.” She shifted in the boots that had worn a blister on her heel.
“You never asked about my past. I would have told you.”
“That isn’t it.” But it really was. She threw her head back. “I was foolish to think you’d changed. Why would I want to hear about all the hearts you’ve broken? I’ll never join that club. Do they meet at El Farol every Saturday night? Maybe play pool together in a back room?” Her words spilled out, rushed and cruel. She stopped.
His face paled. “That’s not fair and you know it.”
She dropped her head. Soon tears patterned her leather boots.
“Please, Carolyn. I love you.”
Dashing shaking fingers under each eye, she wanted the floor to swallow her. “Right. Look, I have to check in or I’ll miss my plane. Just walk out that door, Brody Wolf, because I never want to see you or hear from you again. Ever.”
Brody gave her a steady look, took her wrist and pulled her to the side. People passing threw them curious looks. “That might work with students, Carolyn. But not with me. I’m more than that.”
“Are you?” She couldn’t even look at him. Her nose was running too. Perfect. “Now stay. I have to leave.”
“You haven’t heard the last of me.”
“Don’t follow me, please. This is The End, in capital letters.” She wrenched her wrist free. Looking down at her boots, she watched more tears spot the leather.
“You and I are not in a book, Carolyn.” He bit off the words like that chewing tobacco guys seemed to like out here. “This is real life and I love you.”
Turning, she walked away and he stayed put, damn him.
Of course, her luggage was now over the weight limit. The final straw. All those wonderful clothes and for what? The clerk threw out a horrifying figure, and Carolyn handed over her credit card. Pocketing her boarding pass, she dashed into the ladies room. The mirror told her she needed sunglasses. After rebraiding her hair so tight that she felt her eyes lift, she jammed sunglasses on her nose. Then she shouldered her tote and moved on.
Kicking off her boots at TSA, she placed them on the conveyor belt along with her tote. Pain pierced her like a meat hook. After picking up a small packet of tissue for the ride home, she plunked down in the waiting area. Across the way, a teenager was eating popcorn and the smell made her sick. Carolyn swore off popcorn for the rest of her life.
In the waiting area and on the return flight, people looked at her curiously. Who was the woman wearing the sunglasses inside? Someone famous?
No, someone stupid.
~.~
Thank goodness, school began again the next day. Because of the unexpected week off, there was so much to cover. Teachers and students struggled with the accelerated schedule. Carolyn welcomed it. Posters went up about prom. The thought of watching happy kids dance turned her stomach. When asked if she could chaperone, she put Glenn off. “I may have to go back to Santa Fe to check on my grandmother.”
“Of course.” Her principal had smiled with understanding.
Had Howard proposed? When would the happy announcement come? In the end, Carolyn decided not to alert her mother. There would be questions, and Carolyn just wasn’t in the mood.
When Diana appeared at her door one night, she thought her friend had come for a recap. “Got a minute, stranger?” Beautiful Diana bustled in, her diamond engagement glittering on her left hand.
“Tea?” Carolyn asked, already heading into the kitchen area. These bungalows were so small. Former rentals, the one long main room ran from the living room to the kitchen, all visible from the front door. The T was completed by two bedrooms on either side. Filling two mugs with tea, she nuked the first one.
Diana slipped onto the stool. “We got some bad news today, Carolyn.”
Something in her friend’s voice made Carolyn turn. “Is this about Will?”
“No, it’s Sarah.” Tears brimmed in Diana’s eyes.
A cold fist squeezed Carolyn’s heart. “Her husband Jamie?”
“Right. Serving in Afghanistan.” Carolyn and Diana had never met Sarah’s husband. But a picture of Jamie in his uniform was taped to the register in the bakery. Any time they stopped for coffee, he was there.
“Jamie’s not coming home.”
“What? He decided to leave her?” After the past two weeks, abandonment was her first thought.
“I wish it were only that.” Diana’s face crumpled. “He stepped on a land mine.” The painful story poured out and horror carved a hole in Carolyn’s heart.
“Oh my God, Diana. What will Sarah do?” Sarah owned the Full Cup, a popular bakery and coffee shop that anchored Gull Harbor. Her mother helped her with the bakery and babysat for the two little boys. The family lived for their weekly Skype session with Jamie. He was supposed to be released from service this summer. Sarah had even gone on a diet recently. She called it her Jamie Juice Diet.
Diana shook her head. “What do you do when the love of your life dies? It’s just so terrible. They were high school sweethearts. Can you just imagine?”
“No. No, I can’t.”
A member of the National Guard, Jamie had been activated almost two years earlier. Like many of the men in Gull Harbor, he wanted to serve.
“How is Sarah handling this?” The thought
of Nathan and Justin growing up without a father sent a chill through her heart.
“Kate and Chili are over at Sarah’s now.”
Diana and Carolyn sat there, their tea growing cold. What more could they say? Her own problems seemed like nothing compared to this tragedy.
Finally Carolyn broke the silence. “What about your wedding? Everything coming along?”
“Everything’s fine. And how about you? Did those clothes work?”
“They were fabulous. I can’t thank you enough.” Carolyn bit her lip. Conflicted feelings tore her apart.
“Oh whoa, wait a minute. That look on your face? What happened?”
This wasn’t the time for details. “It just didn’t work out.” She had to create a yawn. Diana got the message, pushing off from the stool.
“Maybe later? I just wanted you to know about Jamie.”
“Sure. Later. Thanks for coming over. Sorry but I just can’t...”
“I get it.” Diana gave her a tight hug. “I’ll be waiting to listen when you’re ready. Man, some days life just sucks.”
“You got it.” The sad news about Jamie spread from shop to shop, cottage to cottage. One of theirs would not be coming home. A memorial service would be held at the high school, often the case for graduates if the family requested it. The death plunged Gull Harbor into mourning, leaving no time for her own pain.
Just when Carolyn’s spirits reached an all-time low, her grandmother called. “I have some news for you.” She was practically singing and Carolyn smiled.
“Howard and I are engaged! What do you think of that?”
“Wow. That’s wonderful, Mama V.” She tried to inject surprise and excitement into her voice. “I’m so happy for you. When is the wedding?”
“Oh, we haven’t set a date. It’s all so new.” She sounded flustered. Dropping her voice, Mama V whispered, “Honey, you should see the ring he gave me.”
What a surprise. “Well, he is a jeweler.”
Laughing with her grandmother felt strange, as if her face had forgotten how. It wasn’t long after they hung up that her mother called. “Carolyn, did you know about this?”
She sucked in a deep breath. “Yes, I did but not for long. Look Mom, it’s great. They’re so happy together. I don’t want to hear another word.” She must have gone on for five minutes, singing Howard’s praises. When she finally wound down, her mother didn’t say anything.
