by Bonnie Lamer
Xandra looks down at her beautiful curves and then back up at me. I can barely restrain my lusty grin. Kegan lets out a low whistle next to me which earns him another elbow to the ribs. To be fair, I did put myself in similar clothes. The deepening shade of green in Xandra’s eyes tells me that she is as lusty as I am at the moment. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Tabitha debating whether or not to smack me in the back of my head. Fortunately, she decides not to do so.
“What, exactly, is the plan to keep the Shadows from escaping into this realm?” Dagda asks. Good question. Good enough to drag my attention away from Xandra’s body. For the moment.
All eyes in the room go to Grandmother. Surely she has thought this through or she would not be eager to move this along. “We will create a barrier of circles around the gateway Xandra creates. You and I will be closest to Kallen’s and then Tabitha and Kegan will be the outermost anchors.”
An audible gulp comes from Kegan. I believe he thought he was here solely as a witness, not a participant in our crazy plan. I try not to notice the slight greenish hue that is trying to camp out on his face. I can attest to the fact that he is not a coward. I believe it is more concern over his magic not being strong enough than true fear.
With none of us looking completely comfortable with this plan, we all rise and make our way to the beach in front of the house. As soon as she is down the last terrace step, Tabitha begins to place crystals in a wide circle in the sand. “We need to create a safe zone. Those Shadows are tricky little buggers.”
I doubt she knows this from personal experience but all lore points to that being a reasonable assumption. “All set,” she says as she stands up from placing the last crystal she deems necessary. Coming to me, she hands me several. Her hand lingers a moment as she closes my fingers over them. “If you do not come back safe and sound, I will travel to the Shadow realm myself just to kill you again.” Turning to Xandra, she adds, “The same goes for you.”
I chuckle. “A couple hours from now, you will be chasing Kegan and me out of your kitchen like you do every afternoon. I will undoubtedly come back hungry.”
I see a tear forming in the deepest corner of her eye. “I will give you free rein if you manage to not get yourself killed.”
I raise a brow in disbelief. “Tabitha, it is not like you to lie.”
She swats at me with one hand as she wipes the back of her hand over her eye. “Go on now; I have a circle to make. I cannot do it if you keep yammering on so.” I give her a quick, reassuring hug and then walk to Xandra who is standing in the middle of the giant circle laid out by crystals.
We line up in order of the strength of our magic. Kegan is a little put out being at the end, but his pride will simply have to take a hit today. The most important thing right now is making sure that we do not allow any of the Shadows into our realm. Honestly, if a Shadow was to get past the rest of us, there would be nothing Kegan could do to stop it. But none of us wants to even think about that.
Kegan places his circle and then Tabitha and Dagda follow suit. With more nervous tension than I would like, Grandmother throws up her circle. Now it is my turn. Once my circle is in place, Xandra closes her eyes and reaches her hand out to open the gateway
I’m not quite ready for that yet. I turn her towards me and her eyes open in surprise. Putting my hands on her cheeks, I lean down and kiss her. Slowly and deeply, trying to fit every iota of my love into it. Pulling back slightly, I murmur, “I love you.”
She smiles. “I love you, too.”
“Are you ready to do this?” I am not so sure that I am.
She nods. “I am.” She looks about as sure as I feel but we cannot delay any longer.
Standing straight, I take a step back so she can do her thing. Xandra closes her eyes once again and begins to tear a hole in the realms. A blinding light sends me stumbling back a few steps as I cover my eyes. I recognize this as Angel light because Xandra has emitted this before. I am just not sure why she is doing it right now.
Chapter 5
When the light finally dims, I find Xandra in her full winged glory. “What the hell?” I ask jumping back to make room for her wings in the tight space of my circle. Looking more closely at her, I can tell she is about to tell me something I will not like.
“I met an Angel of Death. Kallen, she has to be my guide in the Shadow realm. And she’s just thrilled about it,” she grouses.
What is she talking about? “Why would an Angel of Death be our guide?”
She sighs. “Not our guide. My guide. You can’t go.”
I am not sure which Angel put that notion in her head but she had better dispel it right now. “Xandra, we talked about this.” Telling me no is not an option here.
“Yes, we did. But when we talked about it, we didn’t know that your body would disintegrate as soon as you enter the realm because you don’t have Angel blood.”
I look at her long and hard as this information sinks in. Finally, I ask, “Is this true or are you simply saying this so I do not go with you?”
Putting her hands on her hips, she has the nerve to be upset with me. “Are you seriously accusing me of lying to you? Why would I want to go into the Shadow realm without you? Do you really think going in there with the Angel of Death is going to be a thrill a minute?” Flinging an arm in the direction of where the gateway was just a moment ago, she adds, “She already hates me and she’s only going because her boss made her.”
I have a retort on my tongue when Xandra says, “No, I’m much nicer when I’m not around you.”
I would be offended if I thought she was talking to me. She is looking up as if she can see something I cannot. Maybe she can. Or maybe she truly has become insane. “Xandra,” I say cautiously. “Who are you talking to?”
“Adriel. She’s being bitchy.”
She says this as if it explains everything. It does not, but I am going to gamble on the idea that she can hear someone I cannot and that she is not simply crazy. I hope I am making the right decision. After another long, assessing look which makes Xandra more impatient with each passing second, I finally say, “Are you absolutely certain I would not survive intact?”
Relief washes over her. “Yes. If only Adriel had told me that, I wouldn’t believe it. But her boss, the same one that told her she had to go with me, confirmed it. She didn’t strike me as the kind of person who would make idle threats.”
I think that the Angel she is conversing with says something because she is suddenly glaring at the sky. This is confirmed when she says, “How about we stop talking and get going. I think the Shadow realm will be more pleasant than talking to you all day.”
My confidence in sending her off with an Angel of Death is dwindling rapidly and there was not much to begin with. Dragging her back to our conversation by placing my hands on her shoulders, I say, “Xandra, are you sure you can trust her?”
She snorts. “No.” Well, that is reassuring. Then, with a smirk in the direction of the sky, she adds, “But, I am sure she’s not willing to upset her boss by not doing what she’s supposed to.”
Every fiber of my being wants to take this circle down and drag her back inside the house. But every fiber of my being also knows that this would not be wise. Nor possible. Cupping her cheeks in my hands, I search for the truth in her eyes. I see annoyance, anger, and determination. There is a tiny amount of fear but the other three are trying hard to kick it into a corner and forget about it.
There really is nothing that I can say or do to change this situation so acceptance is my only course of action. Nodding, I say, “Okay, then.” I put my lips to hers in a sweet, lingering kiss.
It is only a moment before she steps back. “I have to go.”
I know I will always look back at this moment and wonder how I managed to not tackle her in the sand and not let her go. Or at the very least rant and rave until she finally gives in and does not leave me standing here alone on this beach; wondering if she will ever come back. Instead, all I
say is, “I love you.”
She smiles. “I love you, too.” Then, cocking her head she further adds to my worry by insulting whomever she will be traveling with. “You’re just jealous. You’ve lived for thousands of years without ever being kissed. I think that’s pretty pathetic.” That is my Xandra. Always attempting to stay on everyone’s good side.
I must look like I want to pull her back because she puts her hands up in front of her ready to make me stop. She takes a step back and almost bumps into the door that just appeared behind her.
It is a plain white door. There is absolutely nothing special about it except the silver writing on it. The words abyssus abyssum invocat are written above the light blue door knocker.
“What does that mean?” Xandra asks.
At least I can be of some use here. “It is Latin for Hell calls Hell; one misstep leads to another.” This is exactly what I am afraid of in regards to her trip into the Shadow realm. One little misstep snowballing into an avalanche of danger.
“You need to close your eyes,” is all she says in reply. With another blinding light, she is gone. So is the door. Now, the only thing for me to do is wait.
Chapter 6
I start my waiting with pacing. There are deep ruts in the sand by the time I tire of this. I am surprised that I did not hit the clay-like matter underneath it. From the position of the sun, I would say I have been pacing for a good hour and a half.
Plopping down in the sand, I lean back on my arms and stare at the sea. When she left, I had it in my mind that this would be like any other time Xandra was taken into Angel time. However long she was gone, it did not appear to the rest of us that she had been gone at all. I expected that as soon as the door disappeared, it would open back up again and out she would walk with her aunt and brother’s spirits in tow. My expectations have obviously not been met.
Each minute she is gone puts a dent in my heart. Is the fact that she did not walk back through that door a sign that things went horribly wrong and she may not be coming back at all? She had better come back.
I start pacing again. The sun is ticking towards the horizon like a clock wound too tight. I want to yell. Yell loud enough that the entire Angel population knows that I expect them to help her and make sure Xandra comes back to me. She is one of their own. They cannot forget that. I cannot forget that. I have to hold onto that thought that they will take care of their own.
I sit back down in the sand. I have to get my mind focused on something else before I drive myself crazy. If I had known that I had to entertain myself out here for who knows how long, I would have brought a book. Or the ingredients to whip up some new and nasty potions to use in my slingshot when Kegan is being a pain in the ass. Anything would have helped the time go faster. Instead, I am here with a sand crab that is debating whether it would be better to go around my legs or attempt to go over them. It makes the right choice when it decides to take the long way around.
I can see Grandmother in her circle but she cannot see me. The same is true for her and Dagda and the others. She has been pacing just as I have. Every few minutes she stops and stares at my circle, sighs in frustration and then starts pacing again. I could take down my circle to explain what happened, but that door may reappear with Shadows opening it. The risk of the Shadows being let into the realm is greater than either of our impatience.
If I could only create water out of thin air, I could build figures in the sand like Kegan and I did as children. I was quite good at erecting an exact replica of Grandmother’s house. Which Kegan would then destroy, forcing me to retaliate against him in some way or another. I suppose nothing good really came from us building things with the sand.
After four hours, I find my bladder to be even more impatient than I am. I wonder what the chances are that Xandra will show up just as I am about to pee in the sand. Not to mention, how long do I want to be near the sand I pee on. I will wait a bit longer before I find out. I go back to imaging what it would be like to have sex with Xandra but I find that only aggravates my bladder issues. Perhaps it is time to think of something else.
I try juggling sand for a while. I guess spinning it would be a better definition. I use my magic to get a hundred pieces of sand to jump from hand to hand, then in the air and then back to my hand. I do this faster and faster, creating a wind storm in my circle. When a piece of sand makes its way to my eye and sets up camp, I let the sand drop back to the beach.
Eight hours now. Grandmother has created a chair for herself but she barely sits in it. I am not sure if she just feels better pacing or if she has to go to the bathroom as well. When she creates what Cowans used to call an outhouse, my question is answered. Focusing on my grandmother’s biological needs is not a good sign that I am staying sane in here.
Night has come now with still no word from Xandra. No word from any of the Angels either. I hope that they would tell us if something went wrong. I am going to assume they would.
I have tried several things to keep me busy. I created a basket and a ball to test my aim but I began to worry that I would inadvertently hit my circle walls with the ball. I experiment with creating bigger and better slingshots. I even spend time trying to meditate. But nothing holds my interest longer than a few minutes.
The moon has reached its pinnacle in the sky now. It’s a full moon so it provides plenty of light. Not that I need the light for anything. I still have nothing to do besides worry. I have made myself a cot, which I am lying on, but sleep is eluding me. Every time I close my eyes, a noise as familiar as the tide hitting the shore will open them again; hoping that Xandra is finally home. Grandmother is not faring any better in her circle. She stopped pacing hours ago but has not transitioned to lying down yet. She is sitting in the chair she made earlier and tapping her foot in the sand loudly enough for me to hear. When my eyes are closed, it sounds like the beach has a heartbeat.
The rational part of my mind tells me that sleep will make the time go faster until Xandra returns. But my heart keeps spitting in my mind’s eye and telling it to shut up. I am as far from being able to sleep as I have ever been. With hands underneath my head I stare up at the stars as if they have the answer to when Xandra will be coming back. When, not if.
Has the night always been this long? Now that I spend my nights with Xandra, they always seem so short. This one is long enough to truly be torture. I am in physical pain from the strain of my muscles tightening more and more as each slow minute of the night passes. My body is in a constant state of readiness; ready to face whatever Xandra needs to escape from to come home. I should have gone with her.
The morning light does not bring a lift to my mood. It darkens it. I am ready to tear someone apart. Literally. I get great pleasure from imagining this Angel of Death that took Xandra and ripping her wings and limbs off. Then pulling her hair out strand by strand. From her nose. If I can find a way to get to her…
The darkness on my heart is lifted when Xandra is suddenly in front of me.
Chapter 7
I have her in my arms in an instant. I want to hold her and never let her go – but I put my arms through her brother’s spirit who is clinging tightly to her and that does not feel right. I step back and put my hands on her cheeks. “Are you okay? Have you been injured? Your aunt and brother are well?” I am spurting out questions faster than she can answer them.
With a hand on my cheek she stops my mouth. “We’re fine. I’m sorry I worried you. All we need to do now is get them back to their bodies.”
Not to be insensitive, but the faster they are taken care of, the faster I can have Xandra all to myself to make sure she came back no worse for wear. “Can you feel the presence of your bodies?” I ask the two spirits. “Are you able to return to them on your own?”
Xandra brings my attention back to her again. “Um, Kallen, we’re inside of five circles. I bet they can’t feel much of anything.”
Okay, my mind is not functioning properly. “Of course, I forgot.”
; Xandra looks closer at me. “Were you really that worried? I’ve only been gone for about an hour.”
My face becomes the picture of incredulity. Perhaps her mind is not functioning properly either. “An hour? Xandra, you’ve been gone for a day and a half.”
She is skeptical. “A day and a half? Really?”
I shake my head in disbelief. She says this as if I have not been counting the minutes since she left. “Yes. And it has been the longest day and a half of my life.”
An expression of awe washes over her face. “You’ve all been waiting here that long?”
