by Susan Bliler
Looking around, she instantly recognized the infirmary at the North Fortress. The guard watching her shoved away from where his shoulders had been pressed into the wall. He was staring at her intently, nostrils flaring. Fucker was trying to read her, so she quickly masked her emotions because, well, fuck him, whoever he was. Rolling to her side, she winced against the residual pain in her stomach where Odium had buried his psyblade.
“Sam?”
Jerking around, she looked expectantly for Bellis, but just the Sentry was in the room, slowly moving toward her.
“Go away!” she barked, turning back to face the wall.
“Sam?”
There it was again. Bellis’ voice. Sam shoved up from her prone position with a pained groan and studied every corner of the room, but the Sentry was still the only person within sight, and she wondered if she was losing her mind. The guy sounded like Bellis, but wasn’t.
Lifting her hands over her ears, she pinched her eyes shut and shook her head. “It’s not him, Sam,” she muttered quietly to herself. Scrunching her face tighter she breathed, “Fuck!” She’d always known that a woman’s loyalty was tested when she had nothing while a man’s loyalty was tested when he had everything. Right now, Bellis had it all. They’d defeated Odium and his monsters. She was secured in a cage with his precious halo, and he was probably out celebrating with the rest of the Skin Walkers and Keepers. “Fuck,” she murmured more dejectedly, and opened her eyes to find the Sentry standing in front of her, reaching for her.
Acting on instinct, her hand shot out at the same time her leg did. She kicked the Sentry away and rolled off the med bed. Still weak, she hit the floor harder than she’d have liked, but when the Sentry dropped to his knees and reached for her again, she sucked in the agony the actions caused and scrambled backward until she was wedged underneath the med bed and out of his reach.
Looking at him, she could tell he was a Skin Walker from the brand burned into his throat where his halo used to be. He was shirtless, and that was odd, but maybe it’d been ripped off in the battle. He was beautiful and seemed vaguely familiar, but she didn’t remember ever having met him.
Tucking her legs closer, she breathed deep and slow, a hand clamped to her screaming stomach. Her eyes searched around her for a weapon. Maybe this Walker’s Angel had been hurt in the attack on the Estate, maybe he just hated Megalya. Whatever the reason, he’d gone after her and she was too weak to fight him outright.
The Walker squatted down and peeked under the med bed, holding up his hands in a soothing gesture. “Easy,” he crooned. “It’s me.”
He sounded so much like Bellis that it made her chest ache. Pinching her eyes closed, she breathed, “Leave me alone.”
“Sam,” he crooned once more.
Her eyes shot open and she glared at the Walker. “How are you doing that?”
He shook his head, his face a mask of confusion and concern.
“I HELPED YOU!” she screamed, scooting tighter to the wall. “Ask Monroe!” Desperate, she pulled the collar of her medical gown down and gripped the halo at her throat. “I belong to Bellis! Don’t…” She shook her head. “Don’t hurt me!”
The Walker made a growling noise that sounded so damn much like the noise Bellis made when he was angry or frustrated, then the med bed was ripped away from over her head. It crashed against the opposite wall, and Sam gasped and tried scramble to her feet, but the Walker was already on her.
She cried out, “DON’T!”
But he had her by the hips and was hauling her up even as she tried to fight. One hand remained clamped to the searing pain in her belly, but the other arm shot out to shove at the Walker’s chest as she screamed, “STOP!” Then, all her struggling ceased.
The Walker wasn’t fighting her, just holding her, but even that wasn’t what drew Sam’s attention. No, her eyes were locked on her forearm stiffened between her body and the Walker’s. Her demon black forearm.
Mouth open, her shocked eyes traveled down to her fingertips and then slowly back up. Her ears were obviously screwed up, so maybe her eyes were too?
“Sam?” The Walker holding her changed her position so he was cradling her to his chest before he squatted and then sat, hard. His fingers on her chin attempted to guide her face to his, but she was pulling the collar of her medical gown down and looking at her chest. Bellis! Her skin looked like Bellis’.
Releasing the collar of her shirt, her hand went to her thigh and pulled the gown up, exposing dark black skin. All the air left her in a whoosh, and then the Walker was pulling her into a hug.
“Shhh, it’s alright. We traded skin, Princess. Jenny’s gonna fix it.”
We? Princess? Jerking back, she forced the Walker to arm’s length and studied him. He had inky black hair like Bellis, but it was really short in the back and on the sides, with long wisps hanging into his neon-blue eyes. His eyes matched hers, and Sam’s eyes narrowed as she looked at the guy. Full lips, thick muscles, those impossibly thick thighs all matched Bellis, but… “No.” She shook her head, but the Walker’s hands lifted and captured her chin, forcing her to look at him.
“It’s me, Samantha. It’s Bellis!” He looked down at his chest. “Just different.”
She dropped her eyes to her arm as the Walker started to explain. She picked up most of it, even as shock buzzed in her head. She’d taken too much of his blood, and there’d been some sort of exchange that Jenny couldn’t explain.
“Mirror,” she breathed, and the guy…Bellis, helped her to her feet, capturing her hand and leading her to the cell door where he bent and reached through the bars. Lying on the ground on the other side was a small handheld mirror. He pulled it through and held it out to her. When she tried to take it from him, he held on, assuring her in a calm voice, “Jenny thinks it’s temporary. Don’t freak out.”
When she tugged on the mirror a second time, he let her have it and she slowly brought it up. She gasped when she saw herself. It was her, only different. She had Bellis’ coloring. Even her eyes were inky wells, with just the merest pinpoints of blue. Quietly, she studied herself as disbelief tore through her.
Chapter 34
Bellis watched Sam look at herself in the mirror and waited. He knew what was coming. Once the shock wore off he totally expected her to lose her shit, and he already felt guilty for it. He knew what it was like to exist in his “demon skin” and he wouldn’t wish that on anyone, least of all Sam. She’d already been through so much, and now look what he’d done to her. She’d risked her life for him, hell, for all Skin Walkers, and how had she been repaid? She’d been locked up, disrespected, mistrusted. Even helping kill her own brother had cost her. Bellis wanted to punch a hole through the fucking wall. He didn’t understand why nothing ever worked out for his Angel. His Angel? His eyes dipped to his halo, falsely placed around her throat. It was hard to remember that she wasn’t really his. He’d been responsible for her for so long, and then when he’d collared her something had snapped inside of him. Snapped into place.
Tears filled Sam’s eyes and he bristled, ready for the rage that was sure to follow.
He’d come to her armed with a mirror, because he knew she’d want to see for herself what he’d done to her, but when he’d gotten to her cell she was still out. The fact that she was in a cell at all was grating, but when he’d entered and scented her still-present pain, he’d been enraged. She didn’t deserve this, any of it!
He’d studied her in her sleep, and even with his inky skin covering her, she was still exquisite. She was still his Sam, just darker. The change in her made no difference to him. In fact, it only endeared him to her more.
Finally, Sam lowered the mirror and her dark, glistening eyes shot to his. “Is…is it really you?”
Fuck! She had to be legitimately in clinical shock now, because the Sam he knew would have nut-punched him and then chopped him in the throat while he was down. He tensed, as if her question was a test. “Yeah. It’s me, Sam.”
Her
eyes pinched at the corners as she angled her head and gazed up at him. When she lifted her hand, he barely hid a flinch, and it pissed him off, so he barked, “Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for this to happen to you. I didn’t know it would, or I wouldn’t have…” His words died off, because they would have been a lie. He’d have done anything to save her, consequences be damned.
“You…you saved me?”
He looked away, because the disbelief in her voice gutted him and had emotion thickening his throat. Of course he fucking saved her! She bore his halo, and felt like his. His attention returned to her face when she lifted a hand and whispered it over the healing wound on his shoulder.
“A-are you okay?”
Her questions stunned him and he sat straighter, puffing out his chest. “I’m good.”
“Odium?”
And how in the hell did he tell her that he’d turned her into a demon and killed her brother all in one day? He couldn’t lie to her though. He wouldn’t, because they’d been through too much together and his Sam deserved the truth.
“I’m sorry, Sam, he’s gone.” More loudly, he verified, “I killed him.”
“The other Megalya?”
He jerked his head down in a nod. “Same.”
When her head dipped, his nostrils flared. He had to figure out what she was feeling, because she sure as hell wasn’t telling him. Sifting through her scents, there was relief and…
Sam’s head lifted and she gave a tentative smile. “So, it’s over?”
Goddamn it all! How did he tell her that after all she’d sacrificed, and after all she’d endured, that it wasn’t yet over. “Sam.”
Something in his tone must have let her know, because her smile slipped and her eyes narrowed. When she finally spoke, there was venom in her tone. “It’s not!”
“Sam…”
She cut him off, barking, “Find me my clothes.” She scrambled from his lap, staggering to her feet, a hiss letting him know that she was still in pain.
Bellis followed her up, confusion knitting his brows. “Why?”
“So I can go.”
Her words were spoken as if she truly believed there’d be no questions asked, no explanations needed, no reckoning, but the look in her eyes when she turned to him told him she knew the truth of it.
“You…you can’t leave, Sam. You’re,” his words faltered, and he tried again. “Fatal wants you to remain here.”
She blinked, her face suddenly tight with anger. “So he can kill me himself?”
“He’s not going to…”
“I helped you!” she snapped accusingly. “I helped you kill my…” her voice broke, and she lowered her head.
Bellis fought the urge to grab her, to hold her. She was hiding again. She was always hiding from everyone, and it was typically behind the façade of a heartless warrior, but it was clear to him that she was feeling some regret over what she’d helped him do to her brother.
When Sam lifted her head, she swallowed hard, blinking to dispel the unshed tears that glistened in her eyes. “I helped you kill Odium.” Her voice was calm and even. “That should fucking count for something.”
“It does.” Bellis nodded, then quickly amended, “It will.”
Sam frowned up at him, her tone full of disgust. “And until then I’m a prisoner, again?”
“You’re not a prisoner, Sam. You’re just being…detained.”
She snorted. “Is there a fucking difference?”
He hated when she talked like that. She tried to deter male attention by appearing unfeminine. She needed to revise her tactics, because they weren’t working. To him, she was the sexiest damn thing that walked the face of the earth. Watching her though, Bellis sensed her turmoil and he understood it. She’d helped them complete the mission. The Megalya Hive was destroyed and the monsters there were dead. Sam should have been rejoicing. Instead, she was a prisoner again, only this time she was being held by different monsters.
“Monroe is on his way. He’ll talk to Fatal.”
She snapped her eyes shut and turned her head away. In a tone full of uncertainty, she wrapped her arms around herself like a shield before asking, “What am I supposed to do now?”
“Heal!” The word came out much more harshly than he’d intended, but it was frustrating that she was once again injured and locked up, yet still ready to rush headlong into battle. He’d failed her again, and how would she ever chose him now? Fuck what Fatal said. Keepers and Skin Walkers alike would find her character alluring, her beauty undeniable, her strength staggering. She was hardened and uncared for when she clearly could have her choice of mate to pamper her. His frown deepened. Pamper. He scoffed at the word, because he doubted she even knew what it meant.
The door leading into the holding area clanged and Jenny hurried in breathlessly. “He’s here!” she exclaimed. “Monroe is here.”
Bellis looked at Sam. He wanted to reassure her, to tell her everything was going to be okay now, but he wouldn’t do that to her. He knew better where Monroe StoneCrow was concerned. “I’ll go speak with him,” he promised, but when he lifted a hand to cup her cheek, she jerked away, “Do whatever you want. I’m no concern of yours, Bellis.” More quietly, she tacked on, “Never was.”
Do whatever you want? What he wanted to do was pick her up and fuck her against the wall while whispering reassurances in her ear, but with Jenny waiting at the cell door that wasn’t happening. With nothing else to offer, he grabbed the med bed he’d thrown against the wall and righted it. He crossed to Sam in two great strides, and when she tried to back away he caught her and lifted her into his arms, then carried her to the bed and gently placed her on it before picking up her blanket and shaking it out. He settled it over her and offered her a vow. “I’m coming back, Princess.”
She looked away, murmuring, “Don’t bother.”
Her words ripped a snarl from him and he grabbed her chin, forcing her eyes back to his. “We’re not finished, Samantha. You and I are far from over.” Abruptly, he released her and walked to the cell door Jenny held open. He didn’t look back as he left, because he couldn’t. His halo on his woman, who sat injured in a cell, was too much for any Skin Walker to take, and this shit ended right now!
Chapter 35
Sam sat staring at the wall, her feet dangling off the med bed with the blanket Bellis had given her covering her lap and legs. Her head was pounding, her arms chilled, and her throat parched with a need for water, but she couldn’t pay attention to any of it. No, something else occupied her mind, and had since Bellis left to speak to Monroe.
“We’re not finished, Samantha. You and I are far from over.” His words kept playing on a reel in her head and the only thing she could figure was that he was talking about his halo. Lifting a hand, she ghosted her fingers over the smooth band. The memory of them fucking came flooding back and she tilted her head back, biting back a groan. He’d been so damn good, best sex she’d ever had, and ever since he’d collared her, her hand had found its way to the halo several times as she found herself wondering what it’d be like to truly be his. It’d never happen. His actions spoke volumes. She was a fucking Skin Walker pawn, nothing more.
When she’d woken alone earlier, the fact that she’d been caged even though she’d been injured and wasn’t yet one hundred percent stung, but nearly as much as the fact that Bellis had abandoned her again. But he hadn’t. He’d been there, she just hadn’t immediately recognized him. Looking down at her arm, she marveled again at her coloring. For some reason, it made her feel closer to Bellis, and it irked her that the fact soothed something in her. She’d gotten too close to the Walker. Stupid! She shook her head, wondering when she’d ever learn.
She tried to ignore her own foolishness, but couldn’t, because it was coupled with some other emotion that kept rolling over and over her, crushing her like a giant relentless wave that was trying to pound some message into her. She was fighting to pinpoint what exactly it was she felt. Never one to ignor
e any emotion, or feeling, Sam prided herself on her ability to meet every single sensation and sentiment head on and break it down, dissecting it until she understood it fully. She had no choice. Odium would tolerate no weakness, so she couldn’t carry any, which meant every single thing she felt had to be recognized, understood, and guarded or transformed into bits and pieces that were acceptable to her brother.
Today though, she was having difficulty understanding the hollowness in her chest that was making it hard to breathe. It wasn’t from her injuries, because the longer she lay on the med bed, the stronger she felt physically. What was swamping her was emotional. She felt almost panicky, yet sad, and it was all tied to Bellis somehow.
Bellis. She winced. Even the mere thought of his name made her heart constrict painfully. Narrowing her eyes on the wall, she focused. What was it? Sadness, regret, heartache? Holy hell! It suddenly hit her. Lonely! She tumbled that one word over and over in her head, and then it clicked. It clicked so shockingly hard that her scowl vanished and she jerked back, clutching a hand over her chest. Holy fucking hell! Homesick. She was homesick for Bellis St-Fucking-Croy!
The realization brought tears to her eyes. She’d never been homesick for any place or any one in so long, and yet here she was aching to the core of her soul for something she couldn’t have, someone she shouldn’t be feeling this strongly disconnected from, or connected to. But there it was, centered in her chest like a gaping fucking hole that she couldn’t fill no matter what she tried to shove in it. She was heartsick and lonesome as hell for Bellis, that demon-looking fucking Walker!
She chuffed a humorless laugh as a tear fell and her eyes dipped to her arm. She was the demon now though, and she couldn’t even muster any anger over it. She’d always found Bellis’ skin appealing, and on her it just felt…right.
