by Cora Seton
“I…I…don’t know.”
Zack patted her on the back. “He’s an idiot. Really. A total idiot.”
“It’s okay,” she said through tears, and continued sniffing. “We were going to end things anyway when I left, or that’s what we said. He just caught me off-guard tonight.”
Zack held her away from him. “The two of you had already planned a breakup? You had it scheduled?” He shook his head in disbelief. “And I thought I was the screwed up one.”
She chuckled and pushed away. “I just didn’t think he’d do it like that.” She walked to the open kitchen and began searching through cabinets.
He followed her. “Now what are you doing?”
Holding up a bottle of unopened bourbon, she said, “I’m gonna get drunk.”
“It’s not right for a lady to get drunk alone.”
“You want a glass?” she asked as she filled a tumbler.
“Hit me.”
She smiled and pulled a second glass down, which she filled. “Salute.” She tapped her glass against his and shot the first drink down.
Closing her eyes, she allowed the fiery liquid to scald her throat as it rolled toward her stomach, where it landed with a splash. When she reopened her eyes he was watching her.
“I thought we were going to drink,” she said.
He nodded and threw back his shot. “Damn. That’s some fine whiskey.”
“Hell, yeah. Only drink the best. I learned that from one of my foster dads.” She picked up the bottle. “Let’s adjourn to the living room. You can continue telling me what an ass your brother is.”
They drank and talked for hours. Even in her inebriated state, Georgie knew there was no way Zack could drive home. When he fell asleep, or more actually passed out, she stretched him out on the couch and covered him with a blanket. And then she staggered to her own bed.
*
On his back, feet crossed at his ankles, his arms behind his head, Tanner stared at his ceiling. The rock that’d formed in his gut made it impossible to eat dinner. The elephant sitting on his chest made breathing difficult. For a while, he wondered if he was having a heart attack. He was a little young for one for sure, but damn, he’d never hurt like this, not even when he fell off a ladder during training. He even considered driving to the hospital emergency room. In the end, he had to accept what his brain kept telling him…breaking it off with Georgina was the dumbest move he’d ever made.
Sure, they’d agreed on a limited time period to see each other. And maybe it did start off as something to bide his time and keep him sane while his parents were gone. But somewhere along the way, he’d fallen for her…lock, stock and barrel. Whether he could get over her wasn’t even the issue. He didn’t want to get over her. He wanted her back, with him, for as long as possible.
As that thought crawled through his head, he realized what he was telling himself…he had found the woman he wanted in his life for the rest of his life. He wanted to marry Georgina.
The big question was…did she want to marry him?
Had she fallen for him too? His first response was yes, of course she had, but that could be his ego speaking. Hell, it probably was his ego. He’d never had a girlfriend walk away from him like she’d done tonight.
If he was being honest, he’d thought she’d put up some argument about ending things so abruptly but no. She jumped in her truck and raced out of the lot as though on the starting line for the Daytona 500.
He sat upright. If he did not tell her how he felt and, instead, let her walk away, he’d never forgive himself. He’d always wonder what if?
The time reflected on his ceiling from his clock read four-thirty. He could be at her place by five and catch her before work. He had to tell her the truth before he left for Maryland.
Besides, she said she had some time off when she was done. She could stay here and they would be back together in no time.
After taking a quick shower and getting dressed, he stopped long enough in the kitchen to fill a travel mug with fresh coffee. Thank goodness for his mother and the automatic timer inventor for the coffee pot.
When he wheeled up to Georgina’s house, he had to slam his brakes to keep from rear-ending Zack’s truck. What the hell was Zack doing here?
Tanner flew from his truck up the front steps and pounded on the front door. “Zack!” he shouted. “Open this damn door.” He continued to beat on the door and shout until his brother answered.
“What?”
Zack stood there in a pair of wrinkled sweat pants, a T-shirt, no socks and a definite case of bedhead hair. He scratched his head. “What?” he asked, his eyes at half-mast.
Tanner shoved his way inside, red-hot rage pumping through his veins in place of blood. “What are you doing here? Where’s Georgina?”
“Georgie? She’s here. Probably still in bed.” His brother had the audacity to yawn.
Grabbing his brother’s T-shirt, Tanner jerked him toward him. “What the hell are you doing here? Did you sleep with my woman?”
“What is all the yelling?” Georgina came from her bedroom, still pulling on a long robe. “Tanner? What are you doing here?”
Instead of answering Georgina, Tanner shook his brother. “You knew Georgina was my gal.”
“Look, asshole,” Zack said with a sneer and jerking free from Tanner’s hold. “You tossed her over. Can I help it if she would rather be with me?”
Tanner made a fist and slammed it upside his brother’s face. Zack’s head rocked back from the force. He stumbled backwards and then hit the floor.
“Tanner. What’s wrong with you?” Georgina cried, hurrying over to where Zack lay sprawled on the floor. She dropped to her knees by his head. “Are you okay?” She touched the growing red spot on his face and then glared up at Tanner. “Have you lost your mind?”
A black hole developed in Tanner’s chest where his heart used to reside. “Well, you wasted no time replacing me. What? You’ve got three weeks left so you figured fucking one Marshall is as good as another?”
Her eyes popped wide. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me.”
Zack shook his head. “You have really fucked up this time, Tanner.”
Tanner gave a snort of derision. “Yeah, I know. I showed up unexpectedly.” He whirled on his boot heel. “I’ll just leave you two lovebirds alone.”
He slammed the front door so hard, the glass panes in the front windows rattled, not that he gave a shit. Hell, be fine with him if he broke one, or all, of them.
Throwing rocks and dirt, he whipped out of her drive and headed home. He wasn’t waiting around for a gloating Zack to come home.
Within an hour of arriving back at the ranch, he had his truck packed and was ready to hit the road.
“Why wait?” he’d said to his parents. “I can get an early start and not have to drive at night.”
His worthless, piece-of-shit brother was pulling up the drive as he was leaving. With all the maturity of a ten-year-old, Tanner gave Zack the finger and kept on going.
Fuck him.
And her too, now that he thought about it.
Pushing himself to get as far away from his treacherous brother and the duplicitous woman he’d fallen in love with, he’d driven Monday until his vision blurred and hallucinations appeared in his peripheral vision, only stopping long enough to nap in an interstate rest stop. He needed thousands of miles between himself and them.
How could they do this to him?
He loved Georgina. He loved his brother. But they had ripped his heart out and stomped on it. He wasn’t sure he could ever go home again.
Chapter Twelve
‡
Hell was not just a place preachers talked about on Sunday. Tanner was sure because he was in hell every day. Not the classes. Losing himself in the information and soaking up all he could about leadership, arson, and wild fire management were the only things that kept him sane. The nights were the worst. Sleep, when it came, was restless. Dream
s of Zack and Georgina—nightmares really—where they laughed and pointed at him plagued him. A couple of times, a flash of auburn hair made him believe Georgina was there, but it never was her.
Damn, he missed her.
On the second week of classes, his phone rang. It was almost six in the evening. He’d only been home about fifteen minutes and had left his phone in a coat jacket. Now he ran across the room to answer.
“Hello?”
“Hi, honey. I hope I’m not interrupting your dinner,” Janet Marshall said.
“Nope. Haven’t started yet. Is something wrong?” He carried the phone to the small sofa in the hotel unit and sat.
“No, nothing’s wrong. I just haven’t talked to you in a few days. Your father and I wanted to make sure you were okay.”
“Everything’s fine.”
“How are classes?”
“Good. Some of it’s review, some of it’s new.”
“Well, that’s good. We sure miss you here.”
Yeah, he’d bet. Zack was probably gone all the time with Georgina and not pulling his fair share of work around the ranch.
“Are you sure everything’s okay?”
“Have you talked to Zack?”
Zack, the traitor you mean?
“No. Why?”
“He’s got a new girlfriend.”
Tanner’s heart squeezed and he lost his breath. “Oh? Anyone we know?”
He must be a glutton for punishment. Did he really want to hear her say Georgina’s name?
“Not really,” his mother said. “A townie named Delene.”
“Delene? Delene Younger?”
“Yes, that’s her. Do you know her?”
“Not well. Are you sure you got the name right?”
“Of course. He brought her to dinner this week. Seems like a nice girl.”
“She is nice. I knew he’d been out with her a few times, but it’s not like Zack to settle down with one girl.”
“He’s getting older and—oh, hold on. Here, say hi,” his mother said.
He heard rattling as the phone receiver changed hands.
“Hello?”
The voice was a direct strike to his solar plexus, knocking the wind out of him.
“Georgina?”
“Yeah. How are classes?” Her voice could flash-freeze hot water.
“Good.”
“Oh, good.”
The conversation was awkward and stilted on both ends. He struggled for what to say.
“Here’s your mom,” Georgina said.
The rattle sounds reverberated again as the receiver changed hands.
“Thanks, Hon,” his mother said to Georgina. “Okay. I’m back. The buzzer on my oven was going off.”
“What is she doing there?”
“Who? Georgina? Having dinner with us.”
“Is Jolene okay? Sir Henry?”
“Everybody’s fine. Your sister did one of those shadow-someone assignments and Georgie was nice enough to let Deb hang onto her coattails for a day.”
“I didn’t mind,” he heard Georgina say from the background.
“Still, it was nice of you,” his mother replied, speaking to Georgina and not him. “Anyway, Deb enjoyed it so much, she shadowed Georgie for an entire weekend. And I thought having her over for dinner was the least your father and I could do as a thank you.”
“It was nice of her,” he agreed. “Can I speak to her for a second, unless you have something more to talk about with me?”
“Nope. I’m all done. Just making sure you’re taking care of yourself. Hold on.”
Rattle and then, “Yes?” Brr. Ice cold.
“I’m sorry about my brother.”
“For what?”
“You know. Taking advantage of you and then just, well, walking away.”
Her voice dropped to a quiet whisper. “You. Are. An. Idiot,” she said, and hung up.
Poor Georgina. He knew his brother was too immature for a woman like Georgina and would have a million reasons why their night together “just happened.” And that’s why he’d not answered any of Zack’s calls nor listened to any of his messages. He couldn’t stomach hearing the excuses for Zack’s behavior.
The sad thing was he did love his brother. The last thing he wanted to do was to spend the rest of his life feuding with Zack. They would just have to find a way to get past this.
A couple of days later when his phone rang, he was driving in bright sunlight. Even if he’d tried, there was no way he could see the caller ID.
“Yeah?” Tanner answered.
“It’s Zack.”
Tanner gritted his teeth, fighting the rage that flared.
“Hold on. I’ll pull over.” Tanner turned into a shopping center parking lot and stopped his truck. “Okay. I’m here. Say your piece.”
“Don’t be a jackass, Tanner.”
“You want me to hang up on you?”
“Hell, no. If you had listened to any of the fourteen million messages I left, nothing happened between me and Georgie. Nothing.”
“Go on.”
“Damn it, Tanner. Get this through your thick, jealous brain. Georgie was upset that you broke up with her. I had had an argument with…well, a woman I was seeing. We drank and talked until I feel asleep. Georgie threw a blanket over me and left. That’s it. That’s all that happened.”
“Why didn’t you tell me this when I walked in?”
“Maybe because you were too busy pounding my face. Hell, man. I was still a little drunk. And the cells that weren’t booze-infused were hung over. You didn’t give us time to explain. You hit me and marched out.” Zack sighed. “You really hurt Georgie…bad”
His words dug deep into Tanner’s soul.
“She didn’t deserve what you did to her,” Zack continued. “She loves you, or at least, she did love you. Now? I wouldn’t blame her if she wrote you off as a crazy person.”
“You didn’t have sex with Georgina?”
“How many times do I have to tell you? I. Did. Not. Have. Sex. With. Your. Girl. Georgie is a nice person, but she’s too old for me.”
Tanner had to smile at the last sentence. Hadn’t he been saying the same thing? Maybe he had overreacted.
“Sorry about your face.”
Zack chuckled. “Not me. Got me loads of sympathy at Leo’s, not to mention quite a few free beers.”
Tanner sighed. “I am a fool.”
“Yep. I have to agree.”
“Thanks for your support,” he replied with heavy sarcasm.
“You know you’ve got some serious groveling to do, don’t you? I’m talking about you on your knees begging-for-forgiveness type of groveling. And that’s if she doesn’t slam the door in your face.”
Tanner raked his fingers through his hair as he blew out a loud breath. “I still have another week up here.”
“Well, bro, I’d suggest you think of how to do some nice stuff for her from afar. Good luck.”
His phone calls to Georgina went unanswered that evening. Fine. He would apologize the old-fashioned way…cards and flowers. And pray that would soften her up.
*
“Make sure that Prissy gets two pills every day,” Georgie said to Mrs. Willingham. “That will clear up that bladder infection.”
Mrs. Willingham picked up her overweight and extremely spoiled Persian cat and cradled her. “Thank you Dr. Greyson.”
Georgie left the exam room and dragged her exhausted body down to her office to collapse on the sofa. She went to bed on time. She did every get-to-sleep-trick she knew or that she could find on the internet, but sleep continued to evade her. And when she did finally drift off, her dreams were always of Tanner walking out on her. Slamming the door. Damning her to a loveless life.
Every time she thought about that morning and Tanner’s accusations she got mad all over again. After Chris left her to have an affair with her best friend, how could Tanner think that she would do the same?
She was in love with Ta
nner-the-idiot.
But give her a year, or ten, and she’d be okay again.
A rap on her door jerked her back to the present. “Dr. Greyson?”
“Come on in.”
The clinic receptionist pushed the door open. “Look what came for you.” She walked in carrying a dozen red roses arranged in a large white vase. Stems of baby’s breath and greenery filled out the arrangement.
“Oh,” Georgie said a little breathless. “It’s beautiful. Set it on the desk.” She stood and followed the receptionist to her desk so she could pull the envelope from the plastic stand shoved among the leaves.
The card inside read “Missing you.”
No signature. No return address. But she suspected they were from Tanner, not that a bouquet of flowers could make up for what he said.
She dropped the card into the trash. “Take them to the front desk for our clients to enjoy.”
The receptionist whipped around and carried them out.
Nope. She wouldn’t be swayed by some red petals.
The next day, the office manager dropped off a couple pieces of mail for Georgie. One was a catalog of pet supplies and toys. The other was a blue envelope. Inside the blue envelope was a card.
The card cover was of a horse that looked surprisingly like Jolene. The inside had been left blank by the manufacturer but now had handwriting that read, “Saw this. Thought of you. Not surprising since I think of you every day.”
Again no signature. She held the card over the trash can but her fingers would not let go. Finally, she opened her purse and shoved it inside to take home.
A day passed and nothing arrived, not that she expected to get something every day. That was nuts. Still, she left for home a little disappointed.
When she arrived home, an express delivery box was propped against her door. She picked it up and carried it into the house. She expected candy since he’d already sent flowers and a card. But she was wrong. The box was filled with greeting cards. Some made her laugh with the puns and jokes. But many of them were heartfelt declarations of love and loss. The largest one was heart-shaped. Inside Tanner had simply written:
I was wrong. I am sorry.
I love you.
Forgive me
