by Hazel Grace
“Oh, I’m not trying to intimidate you,” he countered, still moving forward. “You already do that to me with your presence.” Our steps were battling each other; with every one he took, I retreated in response.
“Avie,” he said in a low, husky voice, “look at me.” I shook my head, my gaze remaining locked on the other side of the room. The sun radiated through the windows, announcing the spring weather outside. The prisms off the crystal chandelier soaked in the light, making a beautiful rainbow along the walls and carpet. His fingers brushed my cheek; instantly, my eyes shut tight.
I can’t. I can’t look at him.
His touch was a slight graze, reminding me of how soft and warm I felt in his arms. I focused on keeping my breathing even.
The business reports.
The inventory I needed to order.
The muffled chirping of the birds outside.
“Why won’t you look at me?” His words were taunting, yet they sounded pleading. “I’ve traveled all this way to see those beautiful green eyes looking up at me.”
My back hit the wall and the feeling of being trapped, with this man in front of me, sent chills down my spine.
“Please leave.” I didn’t know if the words left my mouth, they were so low.
“Why?” he muttered, his body inches from mine, and I could feel him, even though my eyes were still closed. “Because Mr. Brooks might come back to see you pushed up against this wall with me?”
I stood mute, his fingers dividing my emotions, as I forced my eyes open. His blue eyes studied my face.
“No,” I replied. “Lord Ashton may come calling, and I don’t want—”
Garrett chuckled, twirling a piece of my hair with his fingers. “Think so? Is he a large man, Avie? Because that is going to be the only way I stay away from you.”
“You don’t want to encounter him, trust me,” I lied. The only thing Garrett would have to worry about with Ashton would be covering his ears from his incessant talking, so they wouldn’t bleed to death.
He cocked his head to the side. “Hmm, maybe I do. I need to know who could possibly be taking care of you once I’ve been dismissed from your life. What does George have to say about all this?”
Shit.
“I’m not engaged to the man,” I rumble, clenching my brows together. “Besides, George would want me to be happy if I chose to marry another man.”
But he’d interrogate the shit out of him first.
“Then he proves to be a better man than me because I won’t,” Garrett conveyed, letting his fingers brush my collarbone.
I pushed against his chest, but he didn’t move. “I want you to leave.”
“You are going to have to sound more convincing than that,” he breathed.
“Did you need me to explain what the word means, Cranfield?”
A shockwave of lust hit my gut when his arm gripped my waist. His strong, lean body pressed up against me.
“I’ve missed this.” His face inched closer to mine, breathing me in. “The way you smell like fresh linen and lavender.” He eyed my neck. “The way you make me feel when I’m around you.”
“What do you want from me?” I asked, exasperated.
“Again with the loaded questions, Avie.”
I pushed again on his hard chest, needing distance. I could feel the power he had over me start to take hold again.
“Please,” I murmured, not recognizing my own voice.
“Just tell me you don’t feel this,” he pleaded, sounding like he was fighting an inner battle within himself as well. “That it’s just me. That I’m so fucked up in the head I’m imagining shit now.” He cupped my face with both hands, forcing me to meet his eyes. “I can’t forget that night at the picnic. So what did you do to me?”
“I—I didn’t do anything.”
“Didn’t you, though?” He sounded angry, but his thumbs brushed both sides of my cheeks gently. “I don’t do this. I don’t chase women across the damn country to fucking talk to me. My plan is to go back home after this is all over. I’m not going to look back.”
I nodded weakly. I’d heard him mention that before.
His fingers pressed faintly into my cheeks as he closed the distance between us, molding our bodies together. “Don’t just nod like this isn’t anything. Like you couldn’t give two shits if I leave and never come back. Tell me you want me to stay.”
I bit my lip, shaking my head. “I’d never make you do that. I know you hate it here.”
“Tell me you want to come with me then.” He studied my face, as though the answers were written there. But he wouldn’t find them. I couldn’t leave Papa here alone with the business. He needed me.
“No.” I breathed, the word feeling like acid leaving my lips.
“So you’d leave this decision in my hands?”
“There are no decisions to make.”
Garrett pulled away, repositioning his hands against the wall, caging me between them. He clamped his eyes closed, hanging his head. I wouldn’t ask him to give up his life for me, and he wouldn’t do it either.
“Kiss me goodbye,” he exhaled. He didn’t move, didn’t touch me; simply left the decision lingering for me to make.
Damn him.
I hesitated. We both could break from another kiss like what we had that night. There were so many abraded emotions that were unleashed that night.
Or maybe it was just a magical night; something within the air or the right tempo of the music. One that I wouldn’t get ever again.
I wouldn’t, unless I did as he asked.
Placing one hand behind his neck and the other on his cheek, I leaned forward, taking in his scent of pine and man. His breathing hitched, his pulse quickening beneath my fingers.
Pressing my lips against his, I didn’t think, I just felt. He didn’t take over the kiss, or move his hands off the wall; he just let me do what I was willing to give. Opening my mouth more, I took his lips deeper, wanting to know if I could experience it again. That intoxicating feeling of needing to taste him, feel him shudder under my touch, and strike lightning through my veins. My body swayed toward him, his breaths coming in short spurts as I stole them from him.
He moaned softly when my tongue found his. His body adjusted, and the slightest brush of his hands grazed my upper arms, but then disappeared, as if he was restraining himself from touching me.
But I wanted him to. I wanted to see how long it would take him to lose his mind, like I was about to.
It wasn’t just that night.
I felt it now.
My whole body singed in contrast to his, aching for him to take over the kiss and make me melt. The addictiveness of his kiss was something I couldn’t deny; my whole body surrendered for the first time in my life. He opened up a whole world of wanting for me, and I wanted to be selfish.
Nibbling his lower lip to coax him into releasing my command and take over, he groaned, pressing his forehead against mine. His breaths were unsteady, and our mingled air mixed together. My selfishness wouldn’t let him recover, nor stop, what I wanted, though, which was more. Demanding his mouth again, I cocked my head to the side, deepening the kiss. Dizziness wafted over me as I took his oxygen as mine, as though he was the one keeping me alive. The self-indulgent side of me hungered for more, the waves of lust piercing through me. That was when he abruptly broke the kiss, inching away from me.
“Now I’m convinced you’re trying to kill me.” His hand found my shoulder, keeping me firmly against the wall.
“You don’t look scared,” I teased, peering up at him with innocent eyes. He flexed his brows, his chest rising and falling with rapid pants, as he shook his head.
“Yes, I am.” He sighed, letting out a harsh breath. “I’d give you the fucking Elite Eight to do with as you will with that.”
I leaned closer. “You already did that.” He spread his fingers across my shoulder, which sent shock waves between my legs.
He looked down at me, his eyes full
of lust. “What is it that you want then? I’m at your command.”
My lips curved slowly into a grin. “Don’t ask such a loaded question, Garr.”
He chuckled, as his hand descended, along the side of my breast, sliding down my ribs. “I was hoping it’d be something in this room.”
A loud knock sounded at the study door, and a groan filled the air. I didn’t know if it was mine or his. Garrett stepped away from me, hunger still in his eyes.
“We’re not done,” he whispered. Bringing me to Papa’s chair, he pulled it out for me to sit.
“Come in,” I rasped, trying to gain normal function of my body. The door opened, unveiling Reddington behind it. He came in with a smile, pausing when his eyes landed on Garrett.
“Garr, I didn’t know you were coming,” he remarked.
Garrett leaned against the pine desk, his arms crossed. “I keep my actions to myself, unlike my brother,” Garrett grumbled. Reddington sent the door closing, approaching the desk.
“I’m sure it’s just natural for you,” Reddington said. “I’ve been keeping Lady Barlow company, and brought my own doctor to assist her father.” He took a seat in front of Papa’s desk, crossing his legs. His gaze landed back on Garrett. “All is good here.”
His voice was calm, collected, while Garrett’s body tensed, his hand turning into a fist.
“So I see,” Garrett gritted out.
“Did you just arrive?” Reddington asked.
Garrett crossed his arms. “You sure have a lot of questions, don’t you, William?”
Reddington held up his hands in silent surrender. “I’m sorry. I was just making conversation with my cousin.”
“We aren’t cousins,” Garrett bit out. “And I really don’t understand why you are here.”
“Ava and I are friends. Of course I would come when she needed it.”
Garrett tsked. “You’ve been friends for, what, a week?”
Reddington sank deeper into the chair. “I believe congratulations are in order, Cranfield. I wish you the best.”
“In regard to what?”
“Your engagement to Lady Chitwood.”
Garrett huffed. “There is no engagement.”
Reddington’s brows knitted. “Oh,” he replied. “Has she realized how much of an ass you are and called it off?” He let out a soft chuckle.
Garrett stared at him. “There was never anything to call off because I was never engaged to her.”
Reddington shifted in his chair and looked at me, scratching the side of his face. Pulling out a white envelope, he handed it to Cranfield.
“I received this from one of the footman at my lodging. I was confused as to why it’d come to me, since I didn’t know you were coming. It is from Lady Chitwood.”
Snatching it from Reddington’s hand, Garrett ripped the seal, quickly reading it. His jaw twitched while his face began to turn red.
“This is getting ridiculous. I’ll be back.” Without another word, he left the room.
“I’m sorry, Ava, I didn’t mean to upset you,” Reddington expressed, remorse in his voice. The air lacked the substance I was craving moments ago; Garrett took it with him.
That was it?
“No need to apologize,” I croaked, forcing a grin. “I didn’t know he was arriving.”
Reddington chuckled. “Sounds like Cranfield. He is an unpredictable fellow.”
I nodded, experiencing it for myself.
“He never liked me for some reason.” Reddington paused for a moment, rubbing his jaw. “I wish I knew what I may have done so I could fix it. But he looks at me like he wants to strangle me half the time, so I keep my mouth shut.” He leaned in closer. “I must confess, he intimidates me.”
I sent him another weak grin. “I’ll keep your secret.”
He smiled. “Thank you. I came to talk to you about something…and I really don’t want to.”
“Oh?” I asked. “What is it?”
“I’ve been sending reports to George, on your behalf, updating him on Lord Barlow’s progress. George has asked me when you were going to be coming back to the castle.” My stomach turned. It was the last place I wanted to go. “I’ve been trying to buy us some time. I know that I am being forward and maybe assuming, but you seem happier here. You smile more, laugh more. Your element is here. I don’t want to be the one who asks you to…to leave.”
“Since we are confessing things to each other,” I replied. “I hate being there.”
He frowned. “It is quite stressful there at times, isn’t it? I was going to suggest for Lady Evelyn to accompany you this time.”
I clapped my hands. “That is a marvelous idea!”
Reddington smiled. “Then, Femme Fatale willing, this whole rebel ordeal will be over soon. Then you can come back home.”
“You act as though you’ve known me for years.”
He chortled. “I feel like I have.” He uncrossed his legs. “I’ll be sad to see you go, though.”
“Nonsense,” I interjected. “We still have to discuss ideas for your business. And we have strategies to come up with. You aren’t rid of me yet.”
“I’m very happy to hear it. I’ve become accustomed to you.”
“And I you,” I replied truthfully.
“I hope that by Cranfield being here, you weren’t...upset.”
I looked at him, surprised he would think that. Or was it written all over my face? “Why would you say that?”
Reddington looked down at his lap. “I don’t normally listen to gossip. In fact, I loathe it. But there is word going around that you may find Lord Cranfield to be more than a friend.”
“That’s all it is; gossip.”
Reddington didn’t push the subject; he just nodded and spouted off updates on his business. We carried on our conversation, like Cranfield hadn’t come in here and destroyed my sanity...again.
∞∞∞
Papa and I had a merry dinner together with no guests. It helped keep my mind from returning back into his study earlier today. My body felt empty with Garrett’s absence and I found myself listening for a knock at the door all day.
“Why are you picking at your dessert, dear?” Papa asked me, chewing on the raisin-spiced cake Mrs. Reynolds made.
“I don’t want to go back,” I confessed, keeping my eyes on my plate. “I’m being watched. Everything I do and say is being sent around to the gossip mills.”
Papa raised a brow. “And what is it that you’re doing?”
I sat back in my chair. Being ravished by Lord Cranfield, sneaking out of the castle. “Trying to not run into Her Majesty is the main goal.”
He chuckled. “I’ve been thinking,” he began, forking another bite of cake, “about your future. I think it’s time to end this charade of the royal family protecting you from something they can’t even protect themselves from.”
I looked up from my plate, intrigued. I exhaled, having wanted to hear those words for years. “What do you mean?” I narrowed my eyes. “Do you have a band of secret men too, Papa?”
He shook his head. “Too much work, my dear. We need to come up with Plan B.” I placed my fork down, giving him my full attention. He’d never spoken about his obvious restlessness with the royal family before; I must be rubbing off on him. “I will allow the royal family to assist once more and prove me wrong. But I’ve requested His Majesty, himself, report to me weekly of the steps being taken to assure your safety. This does not include you being held like a prisoner within the walls. You are to live a reasonable, normal residence there. I entrust that Lord Cranfield will continue to use his men to put in place a plan that will be most fitting. In the meantime, my Plan B will be on standby, to take action if needed. “
“Are you going to inform me on this ‘Plan B’?” I probed patiently.
Papa placed down his utensils, his face lighting up, pleased with himself. “If the royal family fails to protect you or any of themselves, you will leave the castle. They have less than four
months to make this madness with these assassins disappear and dealt with. I will not have you living this way for another year, I won’t stand for it. We will leave Bampshire and disappear.”
My eyebrows snap together. “Leave Bampshire?” I repeat, fidgeting with my fingers. “Where would we go?”
“I’ve been speaking with Mr. Torres, and—”
“But, Papa, he works for Cranfield.”
“Not anymore. I heard about your talk with him, and I had my own. We discussed a new contract and secrecy. The man is more than willing to serve our family without reporting to anyone. He answers to you and me now. We’ve spoken about secluded places; villages where the people don’t ask numerous questions or care when new people reside. I’ve decided on Idenlen.”
“Where is that?”
“Exactly!” he exclaimed, throwing up his hands. “Idenlen is a small village in Hegnen. Now, it will be an adjustment; the people aren’t as high-strung and proper as here. They are farmers. They bring you soup when you’re sick, they raise animals, and—”
“I like it already, Papa,” I assured him. The idea was beyond appealing. To start somewhere new, to live where people didn’t know me as the ‘ex-Queen.’ It sounded normal.
He plastered a smile to his face. “I’m so glad to hear it. It’s simple, and the people are tranquil. I know that is what you want. It is your chance to make your life whatever you want it to be.”
I leaned toward him, wrapping my arms around him. My eyes began to swell with tears. I couldn’t be more blessed to have him. “Thank you, Pa.”
He patted my back. “I just want you to be happy.” I pulled back from him, sitting back in my seat. “If something happens at the castle,” he continued, “send me a note with the word ‘sunset’ in it. I’ll know then that it is time to make the arrangements. We will meet halfway from here to the palace and travel there.”
“Oh!” My hand cupped my mouth. “But what of the business! We can’t leave it. I won’t let all your hard work go to waste,” I replied.
He held up his hand. “No need to fret over that. Mr. Torres will be the face of the business, but we will be still communicating with him and receiving our income, as we are now. I have organized all the details with Mr. Torres.”
