* * *
When Lincoln knocked on our door at six to escort us to dinner, Jenny rolled over and snored harder. I went to the door, opening it a crack.
"Just need a minute, okay?"
Lincoln smiled, looking perfect in a dark suit and a tie bearing the insignia of the cruise line. "Sure."
I let the door close and went back to Jenny's side. "Hey." I poked her. "Are you sure you don't want to come to dinner? I feel wrong leaving you."
She roused herself enough to open one eye and look at me. "I'll order room service," she said. "I don't want to go out tonight. This is the moping and whining part of my grief. We have to let it run its course."
"Is this still the drinking part?" I asked.
"The drinking part will continue," she said, nodding.
"Okay, well, I won't be late."
"Maybe you should be late," she said, opening both eyes and wiggling her eyebrows suggestively. Then she dropped her head back down and sighed. "Oh my God, innuendo is so tiring."
"I got it. And you can forget it."
"Just sayin," she said, her voice muffled by the arm she'd thrown across her eyes. "He's awfully cute. Why not give him a second chance? Or how about just a fling, and then you can leave him and never speak to him again. Poetic justice."
I sighed. "Better just keep my distance. This is work," I reminded her.
"Okay, well. Have a good date with your non-romantic ex-love of your life."
"It's not a date."
"Right."
"It's work."
"Okay." She rolled away from me, pulling the bedspread up over her shoulder.
"Have them come find me if you need me."
"Go," she said.
I did, picking up my clutch and slipping out the door into the hallway, where Lincoln stood waiting.
"How's this room?" he asked.
I narrowed my eyes as I turned to look at him, both of us walking slowly side by side. "It's better, thank you."
"Why are you looking at me like that?" One side of his mouth lifted in a half smile. His lips were full and soft, and I hated that I remembered what it had felt like to kiss them.
"I'm trying to figure out your angle, I guess." Honesty was the best policy, right?
"Angle?"
I stopped walking and turned to face him. "We might as well just do this now," I said. "Look, I don't know why you left all those years ago, and the beautiful thing about time is that I no longer care. But right now, my job is on the line, and you're standing here, vying for the same position—again—and I just have to wonder what your game is this time."
He sighed, dropping his eyes as his shoulders fell a bit. "Selena, I'm sorry about that. About leaving like that. I wanted to get in touch again, to explain... but by then it was just too late. I figured you'd be better off without me." He regained himself a bit, straightened. "But now? This?" He waved around the wide hallway. "If I'd know it was you coming from Perdido, I would never have let them put you in the basic cabin to begin with. I remember your claustrophobia. Frankly, I'm surprised you agreed to come on a cruise at all."
"Extenuating circumstances," I said. He didn't need to know about what had happened to Jenny.
"Well, whatever the reason, please know this. It's my job to show you an incredible time, to help you decide that a union between Perdido and Oceanic would be a great thing."
"And the job?"
"They'll give it to the best candidate. I'm not competing with you, Selena. I wish I never had."
I looked at him a long moment, waiting to see a flash of something disingenuous in his coffee colored eyes, but all I found there was sincerity, and it made my heart soften in a very unwelcome way. "Fine," I managed.
We turned forward again, and Lincoln walked me to the captain's library, a wood-paneled room toward the front of the ship, lined with old volumes and featuring one long table in the center. The captain was already seated, and several other guests sat around the table, dressed formally and making light conversation over wine.
"Lincoln," the captain said, standing and smiling. "Is this Miss Spark from Perdido Bay Resort?"
I smiled and offered the captain my hand. "I'm honored to be here," I told him.
"We're honored to have you," he said. Then he looked around. "Were we expecting two of you?"
"Yes, I'm sorry. My sister was feeling a bit under the weather," I said.
The captain leaned in a bit. "Not seasickness, I hope?"
"No sir," I smiled as Lincoln pulled out a chair for me. "A little too much fun wine tasting this afternoon."
The older man smiled, his cheeks turning pink as he retook his seat. "As long as she's enjoying the ship."
I assured him that we both were enjoying it immensely, and then I found myself smiling at Lincoln as he sat down beside me.
The meal was six courses, and the head chef appeared at the table to talk about each one, about his inspiration for its creation, the ingredients used. Each course was paired with wine, and the ship's sommelier was there to discuss the pairings. Between the fourth and fifth course, there was a magician, which I would have expected to be cheesy and weird, but he was charming and actually very good. Just before dessert, a fortune-teller joined us, and she read palms for a few of the guests. As she was about to leave the table so we could enjoy dessert, she stopped, gazing at me.
"May I read your palm?" she asked.
I did not like this sort of thing, and wasn't sure how to decline politely. "I think I'd rather not," I said.
She gazed at me a moment longer and then leaned in close so only I could hear. "There is love in your future," she told me. "Sooner than you think."
I laughed, partly out of embarrassment, and partly because I just didn't know how to respond to that. No doubt it was part of the Aphrodite experience—wasn't that their schtick anyway?
"Thanks," I said, as she disappeared and a tiny square of caramel colored cake was set in front of me just before the waiter poured a creamy liquid over it from a little carafe.
"What did she tell you?" Lincoln asked, smiling at me.
"Nothing useful," I assured him.
The party around the table had grown somewhat boisterous after six courses of wine, and as we took our leave of the captain, he invited us to partake of his private bar in the adjoining room. Most of the guests took him up on it, moving through the open doors and into the dark space. But the close dark bar and the amount of wine I'd already had held me back.
"Want to get out on deck for a moment?" Lincoln asked, "get some fresh air?"
It was a relief that he understood, and when he took my arm and walked me out onto the wide open deck of the bow, it was a relief to feel the wind rush across my skin, a contrast to his sturdy warmth at my side. He pulled me a little closer against the cool breeze, and I didn't protest. As much as I needed to keep my distance, six courses of wine and a romantic walk on the deck in the moonlight made it hard to remember the anger I felt at Lincoln Addis.
Instead, it felt very much like old times, walking on the arm of the man I once loved.
The ocean was a steady, comforting sound all around us, mixed with the rushing breeze, and I felt instantly better being outside. I was not a girl made for cruising, and I thanked the fates, not for the first time, that I had chosen land-based positions in the hospitality industry throughout my career.
Lincoln was quiet at my side, a steadying presence I still didn't quite trust. How did you trust someone who had singlehandedly shattered all your dreams before? Thinking about it now made me shudder.
"Are you cold?" he asked, feeling the shiver go through me as he held my arm.
"No," I said. "All that wine is keeping me warm."
He smiled, looking down at me as we approached the railing at the side of the ship. "Right? Six courses is a lot."
"At least they weren't full glasses. I'd be on the floor." I'd actually learned that lesson the hard way, with Lincoln.
"Do you remember the wine tasting
event during the internship?" He asked, his mind going immediately to the same event I'd been thinking of. "The one Sandra planned?"
"I remember that it happened," I said. "But the details of the actual night are a little cloudy."
"I'm not surprised," he said, and there was a teasing tone in his voice. "I had to mop you up off the floor that night."
"She should have made sure we knew that tasting didn't mean drinking. I was only twenty-two—I'd never been wine tasting!"
Lincoln laughed, and the sound was warm and full, and so achingly familiar I found myself leaning into his side, taking comfort where I knew I should not. There was something still here, still lingering in the space between us. I felt it as surely as I felt the ocean breeze lifting my hair, sweeping my cheek with its salty breath. If we wanted it, we could take it back, try again.
But that wasn't why I'd come onboard. I straightened up, forced myself to move away a bit. I didn't need a distraction—I needed to do my job. And if I were looking for a distraction, well, I already knew Lincoln was not a safe bet.
"All those years ago," he said quietly, beginning a sentence somewhere in the middle of a thought. I found myself moving near again, to hear his quiet words. He was looking at his hands on the railing, trusting I could hear him. "I was an idiot."
I absorbed that, waited for him to offer more. When he remained silent and didn't look at me, I bumped him with my shoulder, forcing him to glance up. "What do you mean?"
"Leaving like that. I'm so sorry, Selena."
I sighed. "For years, all I wanted was to hear you say that. To make you sorry if you weren't. To make you explain."
"And now?"
I narrowed my gaze, forced out the words I needed to say. "Now it doesn't matter."
I saw the disappointment round his shoulders, push the breath from his lungs in a defeated sigh. "I shouldn't be surprised, I guess." His dark eyes found mine for a long moment then, and their gaze was like a desperate touch, a fleeting embrace. When he looked away, I felt myself shiver again. "Let's get you back to your cabin," he said.
"I can find it," I assured him. "Now that it isn't inside that crazy maze."
"I'll feel better if I walk you back anyway," he said.
I shrugged, forced a light tone into my voice. "Suit yourself."
We walked back to the door of my room, and I turned to face him. "Thanks again for this," I said, pointing at the door. "It's really nice."
"You deserve really nice," he said, that tone of sadness still lingering in his voice.
"What else do you have planned?" I asked, trying to lighten the mood. "We're in Jamaica tomorrow, right?"
He nodded once, affirming this. "Ocho Rios and then Grand Cayman the following day. I've set up a shore excursion for you if you're up to it. A back-room tour of Appleton Estate and then snorkeling with dolphins."
I didn't mean to, but I threw off all semblance of adulthood and brought my hands together in front of me, clapping them and jumping a little up and down in my heels. "Dolphins? Really?"
Lincoln's sad face changed in that instant, as he laughed at my enthusiasm and the eyes glowed again. "I hoped you'd like that."
"You remembered? About my claustrophobia, and about the dolphins?"
The sadness flitted back through the dark orbs. "I've never forgotten. Not a single thing, Selena."
I took a breath to steady myself. "Okay. Well, thank you. I'll see you tomorrow?"
He nodded. "Ten A.M."
I let myself into the cabin then, feeling like I needed to move away from the orbit of those dark sad, familiar eyes. I needed some distance between the strange mix of my past and present. The atmosphere between me and Lincoln, mixed with a lot of wine, had me thinking things I shouldn't be, and wishing for things that could never be again.
Not if I wanted to keep my heart and land this job.
Chapter Six
Day Three: Jamaica
Jenny and I awoke to sun streaming through the broad patio doors, and it was easy to forget for a few minutes that we were actually on a ship. At least until I rose and stepped onto the verandah to see the sparkling blue Caribbean Sea all around us and Jamaica just a mile or two away off the starboard side of the ship. We must have anchored at some point during the night, I realized.
"What time is it?" Jenny mumbled from beneath her pillow.
"Almost eight," I told her. "Get up. We have big plans today!"
She pushed the pillow aside and eyed me suspiciously. "Why are you all excited? You never get excited. You're serious Selena. Work Selena."
She had a point, but I couldn't be serious Work Selena when I knew I was going to get to swim with dolphins. "Lincoln might have been a jerk all those years ago," I told her, "but he's definitely trying to make up for it now—we're going to swim with dolphins today! Get up."
Jenny watched me for a long minute as I pulled my bathing suit and sundress from the drawer at the foot of the bed. "You're forgiving him."
"Nope. Definitely not."
"What happened last night?" She sat up, wrapping her arms around her knees. Her hair was sticking up on one side and mascara was smeared down her cheeks. "Something happened."
I stopped moving around the room, dropping my clothes onto the foot of the bed. "Nothing happened. We had a nice time. Too much wine, a walk on deck."
"Tell me more," she said suggestively.
"That was honestly it. He walked me back here and we said goodnight."
"With your tongues?"
"Only because those are required for human speech." I knew where she was headed and I wasn't going there. "Nothing happened. Nothing will happen. I've been down that road."
"It's a handsome road," she pointed out, one hand moving to try to flatten the spiky hair on the side of her head as she spoke. "One that seems sorry."
"Yeah, he apologized last night, actually."
"Did you forgive him?"
I shook my head. "I'd need a time machine for that. He broke my heart, but I'm not exactly still nursing the wound. It sucked. I got over it. I'm a different person now."
Jenny just watched me, her lips in a straight line as she thought about that. "First shower," she said then, leaping from the bed with surprising speed considering she'd been in it for the last twelve hours at least.
The bathroom door shut in my face, and I sighed, sliding back into my own bed to wait. Lincoln was handsome, and he did seem sincerely sorry. But that didn't necessarily matter. I could forgive him, sure, but only one of us could snag the Grand Cayman job, and once I had it, I'd probably never see him again. And if for some reason he got the job? Same result. I'd go back to Miami and probably never see him again. There was no point to thinking about it any further than that.
* * *
We had a quick breakfast and met Lincoln to head to Ocho Rios at ten, as directed. We rode on the small ferry boat to the docks, Lincoln immediately whisking us away from the crowd and to a private car he had waiting for us.
"The estate is inland," he said. "It's really beautiful, and the proprietors give a fantastic behind the scenes tour. Do you like rum?" he asked Jenny.
"Does rum have alcohol in it?" Jenny asked, eyes wide as if she didn't know.
Lincoln laughed. "Of course."
"Then yes," she said, smiling broadly and then turning to watch the immense greenery fly by out the windows of the car.
It was nice to see Jenny laughing and enjoying herself. That had been part of the point of this cruise, and I hoped she was managing to put some emotional distance between herself and the failed wedding with Ben. I knew from personal experience that it could take years to really move on from that kind of rejection, but half the battle was deciding to face your life head-on instead of cowering and crying.
The historic Appleton Estate was impressive, and I loved every moment of the history the man, Oscar, imparted as he showed us how the rum had been made there for almost three hundred years. We got a good sense of the operation, touring the cane field
s on the estate and learning about the process of making the only rum in the world known to have a 'terroir,' according to Oscar. We tasted plenty of rum as well, and when Oscar said goodbye to us, he left us at the Estate bar with a complimentary cocktail.
"Amazing," Jenny cooed, sipping appreciatively. I wasn't sure if she meant the tour, the Appleton Estate, or the cocktail, but my sister was happy, and so was I.
Lincoln had been quiet, chatting a bit with Oscar when we wrapped up, but otherwise hanging back a bit, acting more as tour arranger than participant. I wondered idly if I'd hurt his feelings the night before by not being more forgiving. I pushed the thought away. Ours was a professional relationship. That was all.
When we'd finished drinking, Lincoln looked at his watch and then grinned at me. "Dolphins?"
I was in the car a second later. I had loved dolphins since I'd been a little girl, and when Lincoln and I had been together we'd seen them a couple times on boat rides around the Gulf, where we'd done our hospitality internship. I'd always wanted to swim with them, but never had the opportunity, and I'd confided in Lincoln all those years ago that I hoped one day to work in a place where I might swim with them regularly.
For some reason, dolphins symbolized optimism to me—happiness and cheer. I knew they were more complex than they seemed, those apparent smiles didn't belie the intelligence that lay beneath, but for me they were a sign of simplicity and joy. I couldn't wait to see them up close, maybe touch one. My heart swelled just thinking about it.
"You look so excited," Lincoln observed, turning from the front seat to look at me as we rode back toward the bay.
"I am," I confirmed. "I've always wanted to swim with dolphins."
"I don't know why," Jenny said. "They're kind of terrifying."
Lincoln laughed. "Really? Why?"
"They look at you like they know something," she said, widening her eyes dramatically.
Take a Chance on Me: The Oceanic Dreams Series Book Six Page 3
