He looked up. “Oh. Hey, Teo.” He didn’t crack a smile, and his tone seemed deflated. Crutches leaned against the seat next to him.
I looked at Jessica, and she rolled her eyes. “He’s grumpy from his injury.”
I nodded as I took in the black rehab boot on his right foot. “Lucy told me about it. You hurt your foot in the weight room?”
“Josh dropped a fucking forty-pound plate on my foot.”
“Ouch.” I sucked in air through my teeth.
Jessica stood. “And now I’m his chauffeur everywhere—can’t get away from the grumpinator. Thank God you’re here so I have someone else to talk to.”
Her comment filled me with happiness. But when she clasped my wrist, the elation multiplied.
“Want to sit?” she asked.
My butt found the seat next to her in a nanosecond.
“Hey, Johnny.” She waved.
He nodded as he and Karen took seats behind me.
There was a media whore on the court who turned his camera to us, but I ignored him. He didn’t look our way for long because Lucia and her team jogged out from the locker room. The crowd roared when the home team took the court. I noticed Lucia’s agents behind the Highbanks bench.
“Go, Luz!” Dane hollered.
Through all the cheers, she managed to hear his voice, and looked up at him with a grin. Her gaze drifted over to Jessica, and when it reached me, her smile widened. She patted her chest as she winked at me. Was she suggesting something with that wink? Had Jessica spoken about me to her and Dane? Her smile dropped when her coach said something, and she dashed to the huddle.
“Don’t be an ass, Holter,” Dane muttered. He’d never liked Lucia’s coach.
I glanced at the boot on his foot. “So, your foot’s broken?”
“Yep.”
“Sucks, man. How long are you on crutches?”
Dane looked down. “Four shit-tastic weeks.”
“Wow.”
Jessica shook her head. “You’ll be fine.”
“No thanks to you,” Dane said. “Why weren’t you answering your phone?”
Her shoulders tensed as she looked down. “We already discussed this. I’ve been busy.”
“Uh-huh.” Muscles rippled in his jaw. “Right.”
She was obviously downcast about something, and I didn’t like his sharp tone with her. Didn’t they get along? They reminded me of Alex and Lucy going at it when they were younger.
Thinking about my brother, I remembered Alejandro staying home for a week or two after his elbow surgery in college. Talk about grumpy. He’d screamed at Lucy and me for making too much noise in the house, for having friends over, for breathing, basically. I’d been so relieved when he returned to TCU. But he hadn’t returned as a promising baseball star. He’d never pitched again.
I studied Dane as he watched the teams warm up. He rubbed his thumb over the back of his other hand, and his mouth tightened. There seemed to be a longing, almost a hunger, in his eyes.
I cleared my throat. “You’re gonna make it back for your senior season, don’t worry.”
His eyes darted to me, and he exhaled.
“When does your season start?” I asked.
“January,” Jessica replied for him.
I cocked my head. “But that’s four months from now.”
Dane’s face reddened. “This is the important time! You got to put the work in now!”
I recoiled. Jeez, what was his problem?
Jessica leaned closer, and I smelled clean chlorine mixed with a floral scent. She whispered, “Sorry he’s being a douche.”
She gave me a thin smile, then covered her mouth when a yawn overtook her. She shook her head, seeming to try to wake herself up, and blinked a few times. When I saw dark smudges under her eyes, I took a closer look. Her blue eyes didn’t sparkle like they had at the party. She wore dark jeans and a maroon Highbanks Swimming T-shirt that seemed to hang off her tall frame.
The announcer introduced the players, and I noticed the black and red uniforms of the opposing team. “Who’s Highbanks playing?”
“University of Cincinnati,” Jessica said.
Fitch and Itch were from Cincinnati. They’d continued to entertain me in class this week, and I couldn’t wait for band rehearsal tomorrow. I was stoked I could make both the volleyball match and rehearsal this weekend, though waiting all week to meet the lead singer had increased my anxiety. What if he didn’t like me? I so wanted a chance to join the band—if there was a chance.
“Ladies and gentlemen, please rise for the national anthem.”
“Fuckballs.” Dane gathered his crutches, then balanced on one foot.
Jessica and I shared a smirk and stood as well. I placed my hand over my heart and silently sang along.
“Very patriotic,” she teased.
I glanced down at my chest, then over to her amused eyes. Her hands were at her side, and for the first time I felt self-conscious about covering my heart during “The Star Spangled Banner.” It was just something we did in my family.
She asked, “Aren’t you going to sing?”
I looked at her from the corner of my eye. “No.”
“Thought you were a music major.”
“That doesn’t mean we belt out songs everywhere we go. And some of us don’t sing at all.” I thought of Itch.
“C’mon, sing.”
I smiled. “No.”
“You don’t want me to hear your voice. I bet it sucks.”
My mouth popped open. “Rude. Did you bring me a painting?”
“No.” She leaned away.
“Thought you were an art major.”
Applause and cheers ended the national anthem, and Dane collapsed back onto his seat. Jessica and I followed.
“Cou-cou-cou-cougars!” the cheerleaders chanted.
I shook my head. “Can’t believe they’re at a volleyball match.”
Jessica huffed out a breath. “We never have cheerleaders at swim meets.”
“When’s your first meet?” I asked.
She seemed to stiffen. After a beat, she said, “October.”
“How do you like your coaches?” Dane interjected. “Kathy and Mike, right?”
She looked down, her voice sounding sad. “They’re great.”
Dane nudged her shoulder. “You okay?”
“Yeah.”
But she seemed as dejected as her brother had been a few minutes ago. I fought the urge to wrap her in a hug. She appeared to need one.
When the crowd cheered, I noticed the first game was underway. Cincinnati served, and a Highbanks player in the back row passed the ball. Another girl set the ball to Lucy, who spiked it down the line for a kill.
Dane stuck his index fingers in the corners of his mouth and whistled, blasting my eardrums.
“Damn, Dane!” I covered my ears. “That’s louder than an air horn.”
He chuckled. “Just want my girl to know I appreciate her skillz. Ain’t nobody can block her!”
Jessica said, “He does that whistle thing at my meets all the time. The parents hate him for it.”
“But you hear me during your races, right?” Dane’s elbow nudged her. “Huh?”
She shook her head but smiled. “Especially during breaststroke.”
I chewed my lip, wondering if I should admit my lack of swimming knowledge. My curiosity won out. “Why can you hear him more in breaststroke?”
“Oh. Well, your head’s out of the water every stroke.” She sat up and thrust her arms straight out in front of her with her thumbs locked together and her hands touching. Her head dipped between her arms, and I had to lean in to hear her. “So you’re in this streamlined position, after your whip kick.” She pushed her hands out at a forty-five-degree angle to her body, then pressed down her palms and scooped them to her chest as she kept her elbows high. At the same time, she lifted her face. “This is the part of the stroke where you breathe.”
“And where I execute my rip-r
oaring whistle,” Dane added.
She shot her hands forward and her head dipped once again, returning to her starting point. Then she dropped her hands in her lap, looked at me, and shrugged. “That’s the breaststroke.”
As she brushed a curl off her face, I realized I was grinning at her. She’d seemed to come alive during that little air-stroke demonstration. I would love to see her tall, lithe body power through the actual water.
“Hell, yeah!”
Lucia must have gotten another kill, because Dane did a fist pump. I was supposed to be watching the match.
“It all starts with a good pass,” Dane said. “Kaitlyn’s kicking ass.”
“Is she the one with the spiky black hair?” asked Jessica.
“Yeah—the libero.”
I nodded. Lucia had taught me the libero was a defensive specialist.
“But damn,” Dane marveled. “That sophomore setter’s the real thing. That set Alexis just pushed to Luz? Impressive. She’s almost better than me.”
Jessica and I looked at each other with raised eyebrows.
“Actually, she is better than me.” He crossed his arms. “Considering I can’t fucking play.”
I wasn’t sure what to say to him. Maybe silence was best.
When Karen tapped my shoulder, Jessica jumped. I scrunched my eyebrows as I studied her, trying to figure out her reaction, and she looked away.
“I’m getting you something to eat,” Karen told me. “What would you like?”
Now that she mentioned it, I was feeling a little shaky. But I didn’t want Jessica to think I was an invalid. “I’m good.”
“You didn’t eat much dinner,” Karen said.
Johnny piped in. “Yeah, and you ran pretty hard with me today.”
Jessica looked at me. “You run?”
“On the treadmill.” I shrugged. “No big deal.”
“Listen, I’m getting you something,” Karen said. “Last chance to choose what it is.”
“Fine.” I blew out a breath. “You can get me a pretzel and a coke, as long as you get something for Jessica, too.”
Jessica’s head shot up. “Oh! That’s okay—”
“I totally heard your stomach growling,” I said. “Aren’t you hungry?”
She looked sheepish. “Yeah, I guess I am.”
“And some for me, too,” Dane chimed in. “I’m starving.”
Karen grunted but didn’t say no.
“She’s pretty overprotective, huh?” Jessica said, once Karen left.
“Yeah.” I scowled. “Karen told me they assign male-female teams, like a married couple, to younger protectees—another set of parents to keep an eye on them.”
“No kidding.” Dane laughed. “They sure missed the boat when they paired China with Brad.”
His chuckles continued as I considered Dane’s former agent and Alejandro’s current agent, China. Her hard-ass personality was hardly the motherly type.
“A marriage made in hell, right there,” Dane said with a grin.
I smiled, too. “You know you miss them, Monroe.”
“Oh, hell no.” He stretched his arm across the back of Jessica’s seat, something I wished I could get away with. “China’s a nightmare. Though I wouldn’t mind the door-to-door SUV service with these fuckin’ things.” He gestured to his crutches.
“China’s actually gotten cooler—less aggressive—since the shooting.” I bristled as the words came out of my mouth. I shouldn’t have brought everyone down by mentioning that.
The Cincinnati coach called a time out, and the awkward silence that descended over us became more noticeable without cheering in the background.
“China’s one tough chick, I’ll give her that,” Dane said. “Can’t believe she’s still in the field after taking a bullet to the head.”
When Jessica bolted up from her seat, I stood, too. From the corner of my eye I saw Johnny get to his feet.
Her eyes were wild, and she seemed to be panting. “I’ll be…back.” She zoomed away in the direction of the bathrooms.
I looked at Dane, who appeared as puzzled as me about her abrupt departure.
“Is she okay?” I asked.
He frowned. “She’s been acting weird. Could be trying to balance everything as a student-athlete. She’s got a lot on her plate.”
I looked over my shoulder at Johnny, who was still standing. He seemed to want to follow Jessica, but he couldn’t leave me alone. He turned back to me and held out his hand, inviting me to return to my seat. Once I sat, he walked to the end of the row, which placed him closer to the door Jessica had exited. He stood with his back against the wall as he scanned the crowd.
“Or maybe this talk about shooting freaks her out,” Dane added. “Did you know there was a plot to bomb my mom’s campaign bus?”
My stomach clenched. “Yeah. I just found out Johnny busted it up.”
“Jess overheard the agents talking about it, I guess. She was only sixteen, and it traumatized her. She had nightmares, but didn’t tell anyone. I didn’t find out she knew until after the election. Sucks she had to deal with that by herself.”
I felt sad, too, and wished she’d confided in someone earlier. But if I’d known her then, would she have let me in? She’d alternated between being friendly and aloof tonight.
Karen returned. She handed me a soft pretzel with a plastic cup of melted cheese, and a bottled water. I scowled. I knew she wouldn’t get me a coke. She also had a pretzel for each of the Monroes. Dane had scarfed down half of his by the time Karen could ask, “Where’d Jessica go?”
“Here I am.” She gave a shaky smile as she took her seat.
I felt shaky, too, so I scooped a bite of hot, doughy pretzel into the nuclear orange cheese. Yum. Jessica stared at her food for a while, then took a bite.
“God bless the Secret Service,” Dane said as he patted his belly. He stretched toward Karen with a twenty-dollar bill in his hand. “Here you go.”
“That’s okay,” she said.
“I know you paid your own money for Jess and me. Take it. Gramps can afford it.”
His grandfather had amassed a real estate fortune.
Karen paused. “But it didn’t cost that much.”
“You can buy me more food later. I’ll never turn you down, sweetheart.” Dane gave her one of his charming smiles, and finally she accepted his money.
Once Jessica started in, she ate almost as quickly as her brother. I liked that she wasn’t a dainty eater. When she finished, she glanced at her empty cardboard box. The prettiest blush rose on her cream skin. She’d lost some of the suntan she’d had at the party.
“Didn’t realize how hungry I was,” she said.
“Dorm food’s pretty bad, huh?” I popped another piece into my mouth.
She exhaled. “Yeah.”
I wondered if she ate with Suave Swimmer Shithead. “Who do you go to the dining hall with?”
“My roommate, Mackenzie. She swims, too. And two swimmers who live down the hall, Kaylee and Emma.”
The crowd roared again. Highbanks won the second set and only needed one more to win the match. A smaller school like Cincinnati didn’t have a chance against my sister’s team.
“Shit,” Dane said as he gathered his crutches. “Gotta hit the head.” He towered over us, then crutched off.
Now that we were alone, I summoned the courage to ask the question on my mind all night. “How’s that, uh, how’s that swimmer guy?”
She stilled, and seemed to pale. She didn’t say anything for several moments.
“Jess?”
She looked at me and exhaled, like she hadn’t been breathing. “What?”
Maybe she didn’t know who I was talking about. I hope. “The guy at the party? Who got you a drink?”
“What about him?” she snapped.
I leaned back. “Sorry, I…”
Her chest heaved like she was trying to catch her breath. Did he turn her on that much? Just thinking of him?
&
nbsp; When she rubbed her hands against each other, they trembled. Had I upset her?
“I didn’t mean to pry. You’re right—I ask too many questions.”
She shook her head. “Not your fault. I’m being a bitch. Sorry.”
“No, you’re not!”
She kept looking down, and we didn’t speak until Dane returned.
“One trip to take a piss and I’m wiped out.” He lowered his body and set the crutches aside. “Fuck these cripple sticks.”
Highbanks was up in set three, and it looked like they’d sweep the match. Lucia did a jump serve, but the ball shot into the net.
“Shake it off, Luz!” Dane yelled.
She looked up at him and smiled. Kaitlyn came up to her, said something, then smacked her butt. As Lucia giggled, I shook my head. Athletes are weird.
The next play, Kaitlyn’s pass veered off to the side, so Alexis had no choice but to set the back row. Lucia approached and screamed the ball cross-court, where it smashed down at the far corner, just in bounds. The Cincinnati defender didn’t even touch it.
“Look at that!” Dane pointed to the court. “Look how well she bounced back from that service error!” His big claps echoed around us. “That, my friends, is mental toughness. Good use of nonjudgment.”
“Nonjudgment?” I asked.
“It’s a mindfulness skill. Seeing but not evaluating. Just the facts—not judging something as good or bad. Instead of yelling at herself, Luz probably thought, ‘Everyone makes mistakes.’ So she could let it go.” He scowled at the side entrance of the arena. “What the fuck?”
I turned to where he was looking and saw a tall, tanned, gray-haired man stride in. Wait—was that Dane’s father?
“What’s that asshole doing here?” Dane hissed.
Apparently he’d discarded the nonjudgment.
“Dad!” Jessica bounced over and gave him a hug.
I stood as they approached.
“This is Mateo,” Jessica said.
Mr. Monroe shook my hand. “I’ve heard good things about you from Dane.”
But not from Jessica?
He peered around my shoulder. “How’re you feeling, Dane?”
“I told you not to come.”
Mr. Monroe sighed. “Your mother and I decided I’d take care of you. Jessie’s too busy with school and swimming.”
“So you’re here for Jess, not me.”
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