She laughed. “Want to bet?”
“Later. I’ll do anything you want, as long as it’s later.”
“Deal.”
He eased into her. He went slowly, which she appreciated. Her body had to stretch to accommodate him. Fortunately she was so aroused from what they’d already done that she quickly grew accustomed to him.
He withdrew and pushed in again. The friction was perfect—just intense enough to get her attention. She drew her knees back so he could go deeper, then wrapped her legs around his hips as she gave herself over to feelings rushing through her.
With every stroke she was more and more aroused. Her body was alive with sensation. Need grew so fast, she was caught off guard. She went from “This is nice” to “Holy crap” in about eight seconds. Her breathing increased as she was suddenly on the edge.
Unable to stop herself, she whispered, “Faster, please!”
He complied, moving in and out at a pace designed to make them both lose control. He filled her once, twice and then she was lost, crying out as her body shattered. Seconds later, he pushed in and shuddered his release.
They held on to each other until their breathing slowed. When normalcy returned, Malcolm lightly kissed her and smiled.
“You should stop by more often.”
She laughed. “You have no idea how much I agree with that.”
* * *
“Delaney and Malcolm are dating,” Keira said, still looking at her computer. “I don’t know if they’re having sex yet.”
Callie did her best not to yelp. “Maybe you shouldn’t think about stuff like that.”
“I can’t help it. That’s what people who date do.”
“There’s actually more to the process,” Callie told her, only to realize that she was hardly in a position to discuss that topic. The last date she’d been on had landed her in prison. It felt like eighteen lifetimes ago, which probably explained why she’d acted so incredibly stupid when Santiago had mentioned going out with her. Just thinking about how she’d run out on him made her want to hide under a bush somewhere and never be seen again.
Keira sighed. “I guess. Still, it’s a gross thing to do. I don’t like boys.”
“That may change.”
“I hope not.” Keira closed her laptop. “Did you like Delaney?”
“I did.”
“Good. I hope we can all be friends.”
“I’d like that.”
Callie thought about all that Malcolm had told her and wondered how they could talk about it. “How’s school?”
Keira looked at her. “Malcolm told you about my essay, didn’t he?”
Callie flopped back on the sofa and covered her face with her hands. “You’re saying I’m not the least bit subtle.”
“Not really. It’s okay. We can talk about it.”
Callie rolled over to face her. “I know you were mad and scared.”
Keira picked at the faux fur rug. “It’s hard sometimes. I want to be okay, but I’m not.”
“Do you think Malcolm’s going to throw you out?”
Keira looked at her. “I don’t know. Less than I did, but I still get scared. Where would I go? I’m going to be thirteen in a few weeks, but so what? I’m still a kid. I can’t get a job or take care of myself.”
Callie felt her sister’s pain. Keira was dealing with way too much. It wasn’t right. And there weren’t a lot of ways to convince her that she was safe and secure. But without that knowledge, how would Keira ever relax enough to be a happy, mentally healthy young woman?
Callie slid to the floor and held out her hand, fingers splayed. “If Malcolm throws you out, I’ll take care of you until you tell me you’re sick of me. We’ll take Lizzy and find somewhere else to live. Just the three of us. I pinkie swear.”
Keira rolled her eyes. “Don’t you think the subject is a little too serious for a pinkie swear?”
“I don’t know. Is it?”
Keira’s gaze settled on hers. “You mean it? You’d do that?”
“I would.” She gave her sister a gentle smile. “It’s not a hard promise to make. I would do it in a heartbeat, but I don’t think Malcolm would let you go. He doesn’t act the way he does because he doesn’t care, but because he doesn’t know how to be a big brother. He’s still learning. Regardless, I would take you away and keep you safe.”
Keira worried her lower lip for a second before nodding slowly. “Okay, we can pinkie swear.”
They locked little fingers and squeezed tight.
“I pinkie swear that whatever happens, I’ll take care of you,” Callie whispered. “No matter what, I’ll be here for you.”
Keira’s eyes filled with tears. “I believe you.”
“Good.”
“Now will you tell me the big secret?”
Callie dropped her hand to her lap as the back of her neck prickled. “What are you talking about?”
“Oh, there’s something. Malcolm and Grandfather Alberto have stopped talking a couple of times when I came in the room. Everybody has secrets, I guess. You, Delaney, Malcolm.”
“What’s Delaney’s secret?”
“I don’t know, but she has one. Sometimes she gets this really sad look. Malcolm’s secret makes him mad, so I’m sure not going to ask him. But you don’t get mad about yours.”
Callie did her best to keep her mouth from dropping open. “That’s really insightful.”
“It’s not hard. People forget I’m in the room and they say stuff. Or not.” She smiled. “Are you a spy? Are you married? Is your mom a movie star?”
“Nothing so grand.” She hesitated, not sure what to say. Telling Keira made the most sense, but what if it changed everything?
“I won’t tell,” Keira told her, her blue eyes solemn. “I more than pinkie swear.”
“It’s not that. I’m afraid you won’t like me anymore.”
“As if.”
Callie nodded. “Okay. When I was a senior in high school I had a very bad boyfriend. He convinced me it would be fun to rob a liquor store, so we did and we got caught.”
Keira’s mouth dropped open. “No way. That’s awful. Oh, wait. You were convicted, huh? And you went to jail. That’s the secret. You’re a felon.”
Now it was Callie’s turn to be stunned. “How could you possibly know that?”
“Angelina went to jail for stealing jewelry when she was a personal assistant. After my mom died, I couldn’t stay with her because of that. They don’t like convicted felons taking care of kids. Not if they’re not related to each other, or anything. I don’t think they would take me away from you because you’re my sister.” She leaned against the sofa and sighed. “Angelina was great. She made everything fun. We’d sing karaoke together.” She looked at Callie. “It’s okay. I really won’t say anything.”
“Thank you. I thought you’d be more upset.”
Keira flicked her wrist. “Honey, life happens.”
Callie started laughing, then hugged her sister. “Yes, it does. To all of us.”
Keira hugged her back. They held on to each other for a long time. Callie felt some of the weight she’d been carrying ease just a little. Acceptance was a powerful drug, she thought. One that might be very hard to walk away from.
chapter fifteen
Delaney couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt so good. After spending the rest of the afternoon and evening with Malcolm, she’d headed for home. She’d make a quick stop at a drugstore to buy a morning-after pill. While Malcolm had used a condom, she wasn’t on any birth control. After losing Tim, there hadn’t been any reason. She’d made a note to call her doctor and get on the Pill, then had tried to go to sleep, all the while having delicious, shivery flashbacks of the afternoon.
Malcolm had texted her twice, asked her out for dinner later in
the week, and had told her how much he’d enjoyed her visit and everything they’d done. He was so open and welcoming, she thought, more than a little surprised. More like the sexy-smile guy than the man who barely acknowledged his sister.
Everyone had different sides, she reminded herself as she steamed milk the next morning. She didn’t care that it was Monday or that she had a biology test next week or that she couldn’t stop smiling. She was happy and she honestly couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt that way.
Before Tim, she realized. Things had gotten complicated as she’d started to wonder if marrying him was the right decision, but she hadn’t known how to talk about that. Marrying Tim was what she was supposed to do, just like now she was supposed to live her life remembering him. That was what everyone had said—at least she thought that was what they said. Or meant, or something.
She wasn’t sure anymore. Not about Tim or what she was doing back at college or any of it. All she knew for sure was last night had been great and when she’d seen Malcolm dropping off Keira that morning, she’d felt all tingly inside.
She continued working, occasionally glancing at the clock, knowing that Malcolm would be by very close to her shift ending at ten. Sure enough at 9:58, the elevator doors opened and he stepped out.
“You’re looking especially lovely this morning,” he said as he handed her his mug and card to pay.
“I’m feeling that way, so it’s good to know I match.”
She handed Malcolm back his card, then asked, “Do you have to head right back upstairs?”
“I’ve a few minutes, if you do.”
She nodded, clocked out, then joined him at one of the small tables. He shifted his chair so his back blocked them from the view of the coffee stand, then reached across her lap to take her hand in his.
“Hi,” he said, staring into her eyes.
“Hi, back.”
“It’s nice to see you again.”
“I agree. Yesterday was fantastic.”
He smiled. “I’m glad you think so. I’m good at work, but lately I haven’t been good at very much else. It’s nice to know I’m good at you.”
His words caught her off guard. Her throat went tight and she had the strangest urge to cry. What on earth? She drew in a breath and struggled for control.
“You are very good at me,” she said, trying to keep her voice light. “What’s up with the rest of your day?”
“Company-running stuff. You?”
“I have class this afternoon.” She leaned close and lowered her voice. “Do you think I was crazy to walk away from a great career so I could go to medical school and be a naturopath?”
“What? No. You should follow your passion. So many people don’t.”
The right answer except she just wasn’t sure she was following her passion. A doctor? Since when? She’d barely gotten through frog dissection. How was she supposed to treat a person?
“What brings this up?” he asked.
“I don’t know. Just things I’ve been thinking about. After the shooting, nothing made sense. I was so impressed with how the doctors and nurses took care of people. I felt lost and they inspired me.”
“Sure. Your dad nearly died, Tim was gone. That’s more than most people deal with in a lifetime. You probably questioned everything around you. Change is good.”
She bit her lower lip. “What if I’m making the wrong change?”
His fingers laced with hers. “Delaney, if you’re not sure, you don’t have to keep going on the path you’ve chosen. You can be a naturopath or go back into finance or start a tea shop.”
“Shh. Don’t say the T word so close to where I work.”
He smiled. “Okay, then a pet store. I’m saying you have options. Do what makes you happy.”
“Does your work make you happy?”
“Most of the time. I like being a part of a family business. I like that my grandfather started the business and that he’s still around. There are a lot of good traditions, a few practices that make me crazy and everything in between. I’m Malcolm Carlesso. This is where I belong.”
Maybe that was what was missing, she thought wistfully. She wasn’t sure where she fit anymore. Not on the street where she grew up, not in the Boeing finance department, not with Tim, not here.
The sense of not belonging was like a remembered emotion, she thought, trying to place it. Then everything sharpened into focus. She’d been young—maybe six or seven—standing on her porch, crying as Beryl had left to go home.
“I need to go be their mommy now.”
Delaney remembered the shocking realization that the mothers who came and went were all temporary. Not hers at all and at the end of the day, they left and she was alone.
She shook off the feeling and returned her attention to Malcolm.
“It’s just I was so sure,” she admitted. “I was determined. But it’s only been half of one quarter back at college and I’m questioning myself. Maybe I don’t want to do the work.”
He smiled. “No, it’s not that. You’ve always been a hard worker.”
“You can’t know that.”
“Am I wrong?”
“No, but—”
“See? It’s only been eighteen months since everything changed. Recovery takes time. You’re finding your way back. That’s a good thing.”
She stared at him. “You’re way too self-actualized and in touch with your feelings.”
“I sit in a lot of human resource classes. It helps with my management style.” His smile faded. “You’d think I’d do a better job with my sisters, but that’s still a work in progress.”
“How are things with Keira?”
“Better, I hope. We have our first therapy session tomorrow night. I have no idea what to expect.”
“You’ll do fine. Just answer the questions and remember it’s all about Keira.”
“That’s good advice. Thank you.”
She rubbed her thumb along the back of his hand. “This got way too deep for both of us. I was planning on a little flirting while we talked about how great the sex was.”
“We can do both. And the sex was great.”
“It was.”
He leaned close and lightly kissed her. “I can’t wait until I get to see you again. We’re still on for dinner?”
“Yes.”
“Good.” He rose and pulled her to her feet. “If you want to talk about your future or your past or anything, I’m here.”
An unexpected offer from a very sexy guy. “I’ll keep that in mind. And now I’m going to study my biology chapters.”
“I always was attracted to the smart girls.”
She laughed and they parted ways. As Delaney walked to the storeroom to get her things out of her locker, she wondered about Malcolm’s past. Who had he loved and why had it not worked out? He was what, thirty-four? Why wasn’t he married? Had someone broken his heart? Had he, too, loved and lost? Whatever had happened, he’d moved on. She liked to think she had, too. She was happy to be with him, happy it was so easy. But in the back of her mind, she had a mild sense of dread and the thought that whatever was going to happen wasn’t going to be good.
* * *
Callie didn’t love her early morning starts—she had to be at work at six fifty so she was clocked in and at her place on the basket line by seven—but she did enjoy walking out of there at three in the afternoon. She was able to do other things while most people were still working, like take her driving lessons.
The school where she’d taken her written test had scheduled her for one lesson and two practice sessions a week. Depending on how well she did, she could have her license in a couple of months. The best part was the instructor came to her with the car so she’d arranged for her lessons and practice sessions to start at work at three fifteen.
Mal
colm had selected the driving school and paid for the basic course. Callie had supplemented that with the additional practice sessions. She wanted to be confident behind the wheel when she finally got her license. She wrote the check for the difference, then had waited several days, terrified it was going to bounce. But three days later, she’d gone online and had seen it had cleared. Now she just had to get the courage to use her credit cards.
Ron, her instructor, looked over at her. “Ready to try that roundabout again?”
She nodded without speaking and tried not to clutch the steering wheel too tightly. Roundabouts in residential neighborhoods were no big deal but the busier ones terrified her. She could never figure out who was going where and how that would affect where she wanted to go.
“Why don’t you go in from the west and then head for home?”
“It’s going to be great,” Callie lied, hoping to give herself a little shot of courage, then turned in the direction Ron had indicated.
Her instructor insisted on giving her directions using compass terms rather than saying “Turn right at the McDonald’s.” He’d told her that the Seattle metropolitan area was laid out on a grid and the sooner she figured out which way was what, the quicker she would be able to find her way around. It turned out there was a difference between NE 9th and 9th NE.
Callie tried to drive confidently as she approached the roundabout. There were three cars in it already, but she told herself that was all right. She yielded to one, realized the others weren’t anywhere close to her, entered the roundabout, then signaled and eased into the lane she needed. About five seconds later, she was out and going in the right direction.
“Excellent,” Ron said. “Do you know your way home from here?”
“I think so. Let me try to get there.”
She drove straight for a couple of miles before turning right, then left. A couple of blocks later, everything looked familiar. She passed her usual bus stop and knew she was only a half mile or so from the house.
When she’d pulled into the long driveway, Ron grinned at her. “You’re doing well. My adult students are my favorites. Everyone is motivated and there’s no attitude.”
When We Found Home Page 18
