by CJ Bishop
Abel began to shake as the memories crashed back in on him, vivid details of the nightmare that had lasted two years. He shook his head and leaned against Cole's shoulder. “I can't, Cole.” he choked. “I can't tell him...”
“You can, Abel.” Devlin stepped forward. “I'll listen, I promise.”
Cole hugged Abel's shoulder. “Trust me.” he told Devlin quietly. “You have no idea what you're asking him to tell you.” Abel shuddered and pressed closer to Cole. How could he say the words that would rip Devlin's heart—and life—apart? Words that would turn him against Abel forever? “And if he does tell you,” Cole added low. “You're going to stay right here and talk it out. ‘Cause I'll be damned if I'm going to let you run out of here and do something rash.”
As if on cue, Gabe stepped over to the door and locked it, then crossed his arms over his chest and leaned on it. Devlin shot him an uncertain look. “I don't know what it is...you think I'm going to do.” he said slowly, shifting his focus back on Cole. “But I'll stay, we'll...figure this out.” Abel glanced at him from beneath his blond lashes. Devlin's voice swelled with sincerity. “I'll do whatever I have to...to make things right, Abel.”
The man had no idea what he was getting into. But Cole was right—he wouldn't stop until he got the truth.
“You should sit down.” Cole told the man. Devlin swallowed tightly then sank down on the edge of the sofa cushion. Cole gripped Abel's shoulders from behind, and spoke close to his ear. “It's okay, Abel. We're right here.”
Abel shot Gabe a quick glance. The guy still stood with arms crossed, guarding the door. He turned his eyes slowly back towards Devlin. The man gazed at him with a bit of uncertainty and apprehension. It was warranted.
Pressing back against Cole's strong body for comfort, Abel whispered, “When I was thirteen and...Savannah was ten...” he swallowed hard. “We were...taken from our parents and put in the care of the state.” he stared at his hands then hugged himself, evading Devlin's eyes. “We were sent to...an inner city orphanage in...Chicago.”
Devlin straightened a little, brow beginning to pinch. He dragged his hand slowly over his mouth but said nothing.
“I...” his words lodged and Cole touched his shoulders. “I met...” his pulse quickened suddenly, hitching his breath. “I met...your brother.”
“What?” Devlin's frown deepened. “You knew...Craig? Why didn't you tell me...” his words drained off when he caught the look on Abel's face. “What is this about? What does my brother have to do with anything?” And the walls were beginning to rise. Abel could see them, building up behind Devlin's blue eyes, that defensiveness that stated he would protect his brother's memory at all costs.
“Craig...” Just the name wanted to kick in his panic. “He...didn't know me as...Abel. That's not...my real name.” he was shaking again, tears burning. “I changed mine and Savannah's names when we...when we ran away.”
Quick breath rushed through Devlin's nostrils. This was going to be bad. So very bad.
“My real name...” Abel's throat knotted and tears began to fall as he spoke the name that would rip Devlin away from him forever. “...is Jesse.”
Chapter Sixteen
Escape From Yesterday
Jesse.
The name hung like a grenade in the air, pin pulled, lever about to be released to explode through Devlin's heart, his mind, destroying everything in its path. He couldn't comprehend what was being said to him. Jesse. Abel's real name was...Jesse? But he couldn't be the same...
Devlin stood and walked numbly into the kitchen area, standing at the table, back to the others. His hand snaked up and rubbed the back of his neck slowly as he stared blankly at the table top. “I don't understand...” he turned and faced them again. Abel stood pressed back against Cole as if the man were his refuge, safe haven. His gaze fell on the boy and he tried to view him objectively, as someone who could...he shook his head.
“No.” he rasped. “You can't be...him.” His mind refused to accept that the same boy he had made love to twice, who had swept into his life and completely consumed his heart, could be the same Jesse who had...taken his brother's life in cold blood.
“I am.” Abel trembled, barely audible. One after another, tears swelled and ran over.
An ache wound through Devlin's jaw, shooting straight up into his eyes, instantly filling them with tears of pan and anger. “Then...why? Why would…would you...” he choked on a cry and shook his head. “No...I don't believe it...you're not him...you wouldn't do something...like that, Abel.” he squeezed his eyes shut, dislodging his tears, and laced his hands behind his neck. “You wouldn't hurt...an innocent person. I can't believe that you would...that you could.”
“I didn't.” Abel whispered, voice shaking.
“What?” Devlin looked at him, confused. “What do you mean....”
Abel shook his head, new tears rising, arms tightening around his waist. “He wasn't...innocent.”
Uncertainty darkened Devlin's eyes, a defensiveness swelling up in him. What was he trying to say? “What....”
“He wasn't the innocent victim.” Abel cried, head dropping. He clutched at his own arms, then whispered, “I was.”
“What're you talking about?” Devlin's pulse was suddenly racing too fast for him to catch his breath, his heart kicking at his chest wall.
“”His death...wasn't murder.” Abel choked, lifting his eyes without raising his head. His blond lashes, wet with tears, stuck together and, oddly, that's what Devlin's focus centered on; those lashes that had always lent an adorable sexiness to the boy's beautiful amber eyes. “It was...self defense.”
Nausea roiled in his gut then pinch his intestines. What the fuck was he talking about? Craig was murdered! Cold blooded fucking murder! “No.” Devlin shook his head, face hardening as he clung protectively to his brother's memory. “No...he was murdered. In cold blood. There was no reason.”
“There was!” Abel cried suddenly. “He raped me! For two fucking years, he...” Abel choked on his cries and dropped his head again. “...he raped me.”
No-no-no...this wasn't true...it couldn't be...Not Craig...he would never....
Tears rushed down Devlin's face. “No.” he ground out tight between clenched teeth. “No, he wouldn't do that. Craig was...was a good man. The best!”
“He was a fucking child molester!” Abel nearly screamed. “He was going to rape Savannah! She was only ten fucking years old! He wasn't a good man! He was a fucking monster!”
“No!” Devlin cried. “You're lying! You're fucking lying! Craig would not do that!”
“He did!” Abel choked, gasping, shaking. “He did, Devlin...I'm sorry...but he did it! And he wouldn't stop! I had to...I had to stop him.”
“No!” Devlin raked his hands through his hair, squeezing fistfuls, pacing erratically. Sobs piled in his throat, choking him. “You're a fucking liar, Abel!”
“I'm not lying!” the boy screamed. “It's the truth! He did it! He hurt me, Devlin! And he liked hurting me!”
“No—fuck you!” he raged, his mind coming apart. “My brother was good! You think I'm going to take the word of some fucking little whore over my own brother? Fuck you! You're going to pay for this!”
Abel recoiled instantly, all fight dissipating at a moment's notice—and the fist cracked his jaw before he even realized Cole had moved. Pain and blackness shot through his head and he dropped, crashing into the coffee table. He lay unmoving, stunned, all sound around him muffled in his ears. As if from a distance, he heard Abel crying, yelling at Cole to stop even as a hand grabbed the front of his shirt and jerked him upright again.
He steeled himself for another blow, somewhere deep inside knowing he deserved it and willing the man to beat him to a bloody mess.
* * * *
“Cole! Stop!” Abel grabbed at Cole's arm before he could deliver another blow. “Don't!”
Cole's face twisted in rage and looked as if he meant to kill the man. But instead, shoved him
down hard onto the sofa. Devlin wiped a shaky across his mouth, drawing away bloody saliva.
His legs were unsteady as he crawled off the sofa and stumbled towards the door, but Gabe stepped forward, arms uncrossing, fists clenched.
Devlin was crying, eyes frantic, desperate. “Let me out.” he choked, about to drop to the floor.
Gabe's fists tightened, eyes like steel. “We told you—”
“Let him go, Gabe.” Abel cried. “Just let him go.”
Gabe hesitated then stepped back, unlocking the door. Devlin rushed past him, jerking the door open hard and fleeing the apartment. Abel turned and collapsed in Cole's arms, shaking violently, crying uncontrollably.
“Do you think he'll....” Gabe's voice strained with fear and tension.
“I don't know.” Cole whispered, holding Abel tight, rubbing his back, kissing his hair. “Call Max—now.”
Abel clung to Cole, his cries cutting off his breath. He gasped for air, trying to breathe, but Devlin's words continued to punch him in chest, the heart, refusing to let him get air.
You're a fucking liar, Abel! You think I'm going to take the word of some fucking little whore over my own brother? Fuck you!
Abel cried harder, fingers gouging through Cole's shirt. I told you that you wouldn't love me anymore...that everything would go away...I told you!
###
Abel and Devlin’s story continues in the last book...
Abel: Shattered
