“I’m sorry. I thought your classes started next week.”
“Mama.” Kylie bit back her frustration.
“Listen, I do have something I want to tell you, something for you to pray about.”
“Okay.”
“The lady handling Daddy’s disability claim called and said there’s been a bit of a delay. Seems his checks won’t start for another couple months.”
“Are you all going to be okay? Dalton and Gideon are still helping out, right?”
“Well, Dalton’s had a bit of an injury.”
Kylie’s heart sped up. “At the mine?”
“No. Playing basketball with his buddies. Seems he went up for a block and fell on his foot and broke it.”
“Oh, my.”
“I want you to pray for us. God has always provided. In fact, I love to see how creative He can be. He’s already blessed us in that Dalton’s boss is holding his job, and your daddy is feeling quite well.”
“I’ll be praying, Mama.”
“Oh, did I tell you Chloe was selected for some sort of special soccer team?”
“No.”
“You know how that girl is always dribbling the ball around the house. Well, she’s really pretty good. It’s a lot of fun to watch her games.”
“Maybe I can get down to see one.”
“I hope so.”
“I love you, Mama. Tell Daddy I love him.”
“I will. I love you, too.”
Kylie snapped her phone shut as the students exited the classroom. Professor Nickels trailed behind them. I don’t know what it will take, but I will get an A in his class. I’ll make sure Miller Enterprises is happy to have selected me. They have to be. My family needs me.
❧
“Here, Ryan.” Gramps shoved several boxes into his hands. “Stack these cereal boxes on that far shelf.”
“Yes, sir.” Ryan clicked his heels and marched like a soldier toward his destination.
“When you’re finished, I need you to stack these rice boxes beside them. I’ll start setting the vegetable cans on this shelf.”
Ryan saluted then picked up the rice. “Aye-aye, captain.”
“All right now, smarty-britches, we only have fifteen minutes before God’s Pantry opens.”
Ryan stacked the fruit cans beside the vegetables. “All done. What do we do when they get here?”
“Just follow me at first. I’ll show you.” Gramps patted Ryan’s back. “I’m glad you’re here with me today.”
“I am, too, Gramps.”
Gramps walked over to the door and unlocked it. Already two women stood outside. He looked at Ryan. “The place is too small. We let one person at a time come in.” He turned to the second woman. “We’ll be with you in just a moment.”
Ryan watched as Gramps took a pink slip from the first lady. Because people were referred from the health department and could only come twice a month, they had to bring a slip with them. Gramps checked it off and wrote her name in a ledger then pushed a grocery cart over to her.
“Come on.” Gramps motioned for the lady to follow him. He handed her peanut butter, beans, and several other items. They reached the cereal, and Gramps let her pick three different kinds. Ryan noticed the woman never actually touched the foods.
“Do you go to church anywhere, miss?” Gramps asked, his voice tendered in a way Ryan seldom heard.
“Not really,” the woman answered.
He placed a gallon of milk in the basket. “We’d love for you to visit our church.”
“I don’t know.”
“Have you heard of Jesus?”
“Sorta.” The woman stared at the items in the basket.
Gramps opened the freezer and let her pick three dessert items. Once finished, he transferred the food into bags. He pulled out a tract and one of their church pamphlets from his shirt pocket. “Miss, I’m glad you came today. I’d love to talk to you about Jesus anytime you’d like. I hope you’ll consider visiting our church. You can sit with me and my grandson. Right, Ryan?”
“Yep.”
“Thanks.” The woman averted her eyes and picked up two bags. “I’ll be right back.”
“Ryan and I will help you out.” Gramps lifted two bags, and Ryan grabbed the remaining three. They followed her to an aged Chrysler. Ryan noted two car seats in the back as they filled her trunk. Gramps slammed it shut and walked to the front of the car. “Remember what I said, and bring your babies.”
The woman smiled slightly. “I don’t know. Maybe.” She slid into the driver’s seat and stuck her head through the window. “Thanks, Mr. Watkins.”
“I’ll see ya.” Gramps waved as she backed out of the parking lot.
“You know her?”
“I see her every two weeks. Have the same conversation. Get the same response. But one day. . .” Gramps lifted his finger in the air. “I believe we’ll see her in church.”
“Why didn’t she touch any of the food?”
“Not allowed.”
“Not allowed?”
“There’s a lot of people in this county who benefit from God’s Pantry, people who use it for what it’s meant to be—help to those who need it.” Gramps’s face clouded. “But we still get a few who abuse it, who try to take more than we can supply. Because of them, the rules are strict.”
Ryan watched the woman turn the corner. “It’s worth it, isn’t it, Gramps?”
“Helping others is always worth it, even if only one of ten had a true need. I’d rather err on the side of being taken advantage of than miss helping those who can’t help themselves.”
Ryan’s thoughts drifted to Kylie. She didn’t physically need food like those he’d see today, but she had other needs. She needed peace, needed the ability to completely trust God with her finances and her future.
Lord, everything in me wants to tell Kylie I can provide for her for the rest of her life, yet I’m afraid.
Ryan scratched his jaw. Afraid? Of what? He no longer believed Kylie to be a money-grubber. He didn’t think she’d fall in love with him the moment she found out he could provide, yet he needed to know she’d love him for him, only him.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart.” Did he trust the Lord enough to share his secret with Kylie? He shook the thought away.
Instead, Ryan thought of her compassionate expression as she watched the Belize missions trip video. He remembered the concern etched on her face as she spoke of her family. He knew her pain with Robin’s decision not to return to school was founded in care and worry for her friend. Kylie loved. There was no doubt in his mind that her heart was filled with a want to see those around her happy and at peace.
She just wants to control how they get it. Ryan sighed. Patience was not his strong suit. Loving Kylie required nothing less. “She wants control. I want her to give it up right now so I can tell her I’ll provide for her and her family for the rest of our lives,” he mumbled. “We’re a great pair.”
“What’s that?”
“Nothing, I’m just mumbling to myself.”
“Well, let’s get on in there. We’ve got work to do.”
Ryan smiled as he followed Gramps into the building. Though usually a bit rough around the edges, Gramps was sweet as sugar to the people he met at God’s Pantry. This was Gramps’s missions arena, and Ryan felt privileged to be a part of it.
❧
Kylie gazed at the two bridesmaid dress pictures Robin placed in front of her. “Which do you like better?”
“They both seem a bit warm.”
“Well, yeah, it’ll probably be cold in December.”
“You’re getting married in December? That’s less than three months away.”
“We don’t want to wait. We want to spend Christmas as a family.”
“Oh.” Kylie stared at the pictures. “Either is fine with me.”
The phone rang, and Robin hopped up. “I bet that’s the florist.”
Kylie turned away from the magazine. She did
n’t want to think about Robin’s wedding. She didn’t want to think about her injured brother, her sick father, or her younger sister pregnant with twins. She didn’t want to think about why God seemed so distant despite her continual pleas for help.
“I’m doing the right things, Lord. I’m finishing school. I’ve already lined up a great job. I’m doing what is good. So, why am I so miserable?”
“What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit his very self?” Scripture from the pastor’s sermon pierced her heart.
She huffed. “He was talking about those who don’t know Christ. I know Jesus, and I love Him with my whole heart.”
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart.” One of her favorite Proverbs verses slipped into her mind.
“I do trust You, Lord.” A weight fell on her shoulders and dropped harder into her chest. “At least, I try.”
Eleven
Kylie glared at the numbers before her. Professor Nickels had assigned a project that she’d almost finished. Except the numbers wouldn’t match up. Grabbing her calculator, she typed in the first row and tallied them. She flipped through the pages of the project to be sure she’d deducted all expenses, then she tallied the second column. She slammed the calculator on the table. “I’m still $9.53 off!”
She raked her fingers through her hair then trudged to the refrigerator and grabbed a pop. Unscrewing the cap, she took a long drink then wiped her lips. “If it was off by a double zero number, I could find the mistake easily.” She slunk back into her chair. “But this could take forever to find.”
A knock sounded at the door, and Kylie glared at the clock. “Who could that be?” She walked over and peeked through the peephole. “Ryan?” She unbolted the door and opened it. “Hey.”
“Ya ready?”
“Ready for what?”
“Ready for the missions meeting.” He furrowed his eye-brows. “You didn’t remember we had another meeting tonight, did you?”
Kylie smacked her hip. “I completely forgot. I’m working on this project for my accounting class.”
“Oh.”
“But. . .” Kylie slipped on a pair of flip-flops and grabbed her purse. “I could use a break.” After stepping outside, she dug through her purse, found her keys, and dead-bolted the door.
She followed Ryan to his car and slid into the passenger’s seat. As he pulled the car into traffic, Kylie opened the visor mirror to apply some lipstick. She gasped. “Ryan.”
“What?”
“I’m a mess.” She stared at her face, clear of all makeup, of all color. “I forgot I washed my face when I got home.”
“I think you look pretty.”
“Pretty! I’m a ghost. I can’t go looking like this.” She scoured her purse for some blush, some powder, anything. Nothing. She couldn’t even find her lipstick.
Ryan pulled into the church’s parking lot. He shut off the car and turned toward her. Placing one hand on hers, he cupped her chin with the other and turned her to face him. “You’re beautiful, Ki.”
The intensity of his voice gripped her. His gaze devoured every inch of her face. Her heart fluttered at his attraction, and she couldn’t tear her gaze from him. Her eyes widened as he leaned closer. He’s going to kiss me.
Excitement tingled through her veins. I want him to kiss me. She closed her eyes and lifted her chin.
He kissed her cheek.
Stunned and a bit disappointed, she opened her eyes as he reached for the door handle. His hand shook as he pushed the door open. He wanted to kiss me. The knowledge surged through her in a satisfaction she couldn’t describe. I wanted him to kiss me.
Digesting the truth of it, Kylie slipped out of the car and followed Ryan into the church. “Tonight we’re splitting into groups.” Ryan didn’t make eye contact with her. “One group is made of medical people. One of manual labor or repair people. And the last are those who are going as Bible school workers or general helpers. We’ll go to that group.”
“So, they break up to. . . ?”
“To talk about the items we need to collect for our specific purposes—so that we can plan what we want to do and how we want to go about doing it.”
“Oh, okay.”
Kylie found a seat in the already made circle beside a large woman with an infant on her lap. “Hi.”
“So, what are you going to be doing in Belize?” the woman asked.
Kylie shrugged. “I don’t have any special talents. I can hold a baby, though.”
“Ya want to start now?” The woman’s face broke into a large grin. “I’m supposed to be making coffee for the group, but my husband couldn’t get off work in time to watch Suzanna.”
“Sure.” Kylie reached for the baby then turned Suzanna around to face her.
“My name’s Candy.” She pulled up the baby’s falling shoe. Suzanna smiled up at Kylie. “I think she likes you. You’ll do just fine.”
Kylie peered down at the baby. “I have four nephews and three more babies on the way.” Of course, Kylie had hardly ever held any of them. She’d been too busy to visit much. A pain stabbed her heart as Suzanna reached for her necklace. Sudden longing for her family nestled inside her as she inhaled the sweet scent that belonged only to babies.
“She’s a cutie, isn’t she?” Ryan sat beside her.
“Yes.”
“She’s such a blessing for Candy and her husband. They had five miscarriages. Candy couldn’t seem to carry a baby to term.”
“Really?” Kylie caressed the baby’s soft, chubby hand.
“Yeah. Candy and Michael looked like the perfect couple. Great jobs. Nice home. Both loved the Lord. But they hurt on the inside because they wanted a child so badly.”
“I’m happy God allowed Candy to have her.”
“Suzanna’s adopted.”
“She is?”
“Yeah.”
A man at the front of the circle motioned for the meeting to begin.
Ryan leaned over. “Sometimes God gives us a different route. It may not be the one we expect, but it’s still perfect.”
Kylie kissed Suzanna’s cheek. She tried to focus on the plans the group started to make, but she hashed over Ryan’s words in her mind. She’d marked her destination as a high-school teen. Mapped out the perfect route and followed it to exactness. She was sure God had guided her decisions. Logically—practically, her plan made sense.
She glanced at Ryan. Not only was he fun to be around, his heart was also big, so generous—she’d never met anyone like him. And integrity. He didn’t kiss her when she gave him the chance. She knew he wanted to. Her destination—graduation and a good job—was so close, only months away. Studying Ryan, she knew her heart longed for a detour.
God, my route is a good one. I want to be able to help my family. Surely I am following Your will. She glanced down at the Suzanna. Her heart wasn’t convinced. Even her mind couldn’t form solid confirmation. And peace evaded her completely.
❧
Ryan stuck a french fry into his mouth, then swallowed a gulp of pop. “So, whaddya think about Belize?”
“I can’t wait to go.”
“I’m telling you, Ki, there is nothing better than to see those children’s eyes light up when we come. They know we’re bringing balloons and candy and toys, and they know more about Jesus than a lot of churchgoing adults I know.”
“I don’t think I could dress up like a clown or anything like that.”
“Hold the babies, huh?”
“Yep.” She grinned, and crimson flooded her cheeks and neck. “Or help in any way I’m needed.”
“You’ll do wonderful taking care of babies.” He thought of Suzanna, wiggling in her arms. Contentment had flooded her face, and for a moment, Ryan imagined Kylie holding their child, their daughter.
He longed to take Kylie in his arms. Before the meeting, he’d almost done it. She’d closed her eyes, welcomed his kiss. But she wasn’t ready. He knew she wasn’t. He didn’t want t
o risk her shutting him out completely.
He shoved another fry into his mouth as Kylie nibbled on a piece of salad. They really were different. Kylie ate a chicken salad with light dressing while he devoured a hamburger and french fries drenched in ketchup. She was a classic beauty sitting with a Richie Cunningham look-alike. She was steady; he was fly-by-night. Quiet Kylie. Outgoing Ryan.
And yet, she was right.
Everything about her drew him, especially their differences. He just had to wait for her trust issues with God to be resolved. God, in His perfect, humorous way, chose to work on Ryan’s lack of patience at the same time.
“Have you already raised the money for the trip?” Kylie’s question interrupted his thoughts.
Now would be the perfect time to tell her the truth. Vanessa’s face flooded his mind. The expensive outfit she’d bought and handed him the receipt for the day after he’d shared the truth with her. She’d fawned on him, tried to manipulate him, and his heart had shattered. No, he couldn’t tell Kylie. Not yet. “Uh, I haven’t raised any money.”
“Well, what kinds of things can we do? I just don’t know how I’ll ever come up with enough.”
“You know about the craft fair in early November. That always goes over well.”
“Yes.” Kylie twirled a piece of salad with her fork. “I’m making Christmas-colored hair bows for that, remember? Do we do anything else as a group?”
“A bake sale, I know.”
“That sounds good.” She pushed a cherry tomato to the side of her plate. “Money. It’s a constant pain in my side.”
“God always provides.”
“Yes. That’s true.” Kylie pinned him with her gaze. “But it’s a lot easier for some than others. Like you. How in the world do you work for an amusement park and not think anything about the cost of doing this type of thing?”
Tell her now. This is your chance. Trust God with her response. “Well, I—”
“Does your grandfather pay for it? I guess since you live in his house, you can save up or something. Are you still working at the park on weekends until it closes?”
She thinks I’m a moocher. I need to tell her right now. Ryan sat still, unsure how to say the truth. “Just spit it out,” Gramps would tell him, but it wasn’t that easy. He probably did appear irresponsible in her eyes. Jim’s words about a woman needing to feel safe and settled replayed in his mind. “The truth is—”
Picket Fence Pursuit Page 8
