Ryan’s heart nearly burst with adoration for the woman as they walked away. She knew exactly what to say, what to do to calm Heidi. A natural love for his godchild spilled from within her. She’d make a wonderful mother.
The hours passed, and Kylie still held Heidi everywhere they went. The poor child was completely overwhelmed by all there was to do and see at Holiday World. Dana relished riding the Hallow Swings. Evan had even convinced her to ride the Legend roller coaster as she just made the height cutoff, but Heidi remained as close to Kylie as her little body could get. After enjoying pizza for dinner, Ryan took them to the souvenir shop and let the children pick out a candy and toy. To his surprise, Heidi selected a stuffed Holidog. She gripped it in her hand and nestled back into Kylie’s chest.
Walking back to the car, Ryan wondered what Kylie thought. She had to be exhausted. Heidi wouldn’t let him take her, though he’d tried many times. He knew Kylie’s arms had to ache. After Evan helped secure Dana’s seat belt then latched his own, Ryan watched as Kylie lowered Heidi into her car seat and fastened it. Kylie slid into the passenger seat, laid her head back, and closed her eyes. What was I thinking taking the children to Holiday World? I’ve worn Kylie to the bone. She’ll never want to do anything like this again.
He drove to the Nelsons’ house and stopped the car. Evan and Dana jumped out of the back and raced inside, yelling about the great day they’d had. Kylie stepped out of the car and unbuckled a sleeping Heidi. She picked her up and nestled the girl into her shoulder. After kissing her cheek, she handed Heidi to Melissa, then got back into the car.
“Thanks for taking them.” Melissa smiled at Ryan.
“Did you and Neal have fun?”
“We had a great time. You’re too good, Ryan Watkins.” She kissed his cheek. “I better take this girl inside. She’s plumb tuckered out.”
“Yes, she is.” Ryan got into the car. He looked at Kylie. That one is plumb tuckered out, too. He drove to her apartment. Silence filled the car. Peeking at her, he noticed her head resting against the window, her eyes closed. I’ve killed her, Lord. I should have told her my plans, given her the chance to say it would be too hard of a day. He pulled into the parking space and turned off the car.
He gently touched her cheek. “We’re here, Ki.”
Her eyes fluttered open and she inhaled a long breath. “I’m sorry. I must have fallen asleep.”
“No, I’m sorry. I should have told you where we were going. I never dreamed Heidi would—”
Kylie placed her hand on his. A single tear slipped down her cheek. “That was the best day I’ve had in a long time. Thank you for taking me.”
Stunned, Ryan watched as she opened the door and made her way to her apartment. She waved and then slipped inside and shut the door.
❧
Kylie fell onto the couch in utter exhaustion. She allowed the tears to fall down her cheeks as the sweet smell of Heidi lingered about her. She could still feel the girl’s embrace about her neck. Probably had the marks to prove it. God, I’ve missed so much with my family, with my own nephews. I’ve been so preoccupied. Give me the chance to love on them. To go to the park. To read them a story. To hold them and tell them how much they mean to me.
The folder from the ministry leaders lay on the coffee table in front of her. Her heart screamed to take the position. She’d have time to spend with her family, but what about Miller Enterprises? It was her dream, her means to help her family. Surely it was God Himself who’d provided her with the position. She sat up and kicked off her shoes. Yes, she was just being emotional. She was tired from the long day. Without a doubt, God had blessed her with a wonderful opportunity and the perfect job.
Fifteen
After several knocks, Kylie opened the front door. Wearing a pinstriped brown suit and yellow silk tie, Brad smiled down at her. She’d pegged him sly as a fox, but there was no denying he’d been hit by the handsome stick.
“Kylie, you look surprised to see me.”
“I am. You know where I live?”
Brad smirked. “It would be on the résumé.” His gaze roamed up and down her body. “Cleaning today?”
Feeling violated, Kylie squinted as her lips formed a straight line. She tugged the bottom of her white T-shirt farther down her jean shorts. “No. As a matter of fact, I’m getting ready to go to an informal meeting.”
“ ‘Informal’ being the key word.” He snorted and tilted his head to look past her and into her apartment. “Good manners would insist you invite me in.”
“No.” Kylie stepped outside and shut the door behind her. “Not necessarily. Especially not when the weather is as lovely as it is right now and we have two comfortable chairs to sit in and enjoy it.” Kylie sat in one of the lawn chairs on the apartment’s small front porch. She motioned for Brad to sit in the other. “Now, to what do I owe the privilege of this visit?”
He dusted the chair’s seat, then sat. “All right then.” He clasped his hands. “Miller’s been trying to get in touch with you for a week.”
“He has? My answering machine’s been giving me fits. One moment it works, the next it doesn’t.”
“Well, he planned to cancel a meeting to make a trip over here, but I told him not to worry. I could handle this.”
Queasiness churned inside her. “What’s up?”
He handed her a memo. “It seems the position you were hired for isn’t needed.”
Kylie tried to skim the content. Heaviness filled her heart, and tears welled in her eyes. She took long breaths to hold her emotions at bay in front of Brad. Standing, she lifted her chin and extended her hand. “Thank you for coming personally.”
He stood and took her hand. “That’s the breaks, kid.” He winked, turned, and walked toward his car.
Kylie stepped inside the apartment. After shutting the door, she leaned against it and allowed the dam inside her to crumble. I guess You’re telling me to take the job at the ministry, God. I thought I was keeping the one at Miller’s.
❧
Arms full of Chinese takeout, Ryan kicked Kylie’s front door with his foot. His heart had plunged when she’d called him crying, saying she couldn’t attend the missions meeting. He couldn’t make heads or tails of her reason. He could only distinguish the word “Brad.”
If there was a person on the planet Ryan felt distrust for, it would be Brad Dickson. Christian feelings did not surface when Ryan thought of that man. The fact that Brad often sweet-talked Kylie didn’t help matters.
Kylie opened the door. Her eyes, bloodshot and swollen from crying, glanced at his packages. She sniffed and offered a weak smile. “Come on in, Ryan.”
He set the bags on the table, then pulled out a box. “I’ve got sweet-and-sour chicken, sweet-and-sour pork, some General Tso’s, two kinds of rice, crab rangoons. . .”
Kylie rested her hand on his. “Thanks, Ryan.” She disappeared into the kitchen and returned with two plates, forks, and cans of pop. They filled their plates. “Let’s go sit on the couch.”
Ryan picked up his drink with his free hand and followed Kylie. They ate in silence except for Kylie’s occasional sniff. Ryan peeked at her, unsure what to say and when to say it. He took another bite and swallowed. She sniffed. He couldn’t take it anymore. “You want to talk about it, Ki?”
She let out a long breath. “I don’t have a job in January.”
Ryan laid his plate on the coffee table and scooted closer to her. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder. “I’m sorry.”
Tears formed and spilled quickly from her eyes. “It was the perfect job, and Miller sent Brad over here to tell me. Mr. Hoity-Toity himself.”
“I thought you liked Brad.”
Kylie scrunched up her face. “Ugh. He’s an uppity snob if ever there was one.” Kylie’s expression loosened. “I shouldn’t have said that. I try to pray for him. He just makes me so—so mad.”
Ryan scratched his jaw. Here, he’d believed Kylie liked Brad, but if he thought about it,
Kylie never flirted. She was polite, courteous, but she didn’t lead Brad on. He peered at the woman beside him. She wasn’t like Brad or Vanessa. She was goal-driven, determined, but she wasn’t money hungry.
Deep down, he knew that. His own fears of not being accepted for himself had kept him from seeing Kylie for the woman she was. What a fool I am.
“Thanks for the Chinese, Ryan.” Kylie interrupted his revelation. She looked at her watch. “The meeting starts in about twenty minutes.”
“You feel up to going?”
Kylie shook her head. “I think I’ll stay home tonight.”
“You want me to stay with you? We can rent a funny movie or just hang out.”
“No. You go.” She picked up her Bible from the shelf under the coffee table. “I think I’m going to spend some time in this tonight.”
Ryan stood and kissed her forehead. “I’ll be praying for you.”
❧
Kylie opened her Bible. A slip of paper fell onto her lap. “It’s the verse from the singles’ fellowship.” She read it. “ ‘He who pursues righteousness and love finds life, prosperity and honor,’ Proverbs 21:21.”
The phone rang, and she laid the paper and the Bible on the coffee table. She answered the call, and a man with the invitation company asked to speak with Robin. “She’s not here right now, but I’ll tell her you called.”
Kylie laid down the phone, then started to clear the table. The proverb swam through her mind. Life, prosperity, and honor—she’d wanted them since she was a small girl.
She wanted a life free of financial worry. Her mother always said she was silly and too sensitive, but Kylie hated feeling bad for asking her parents for money for a movie or for a snack after school. She knew everything she asked for would be a hardship for them. Sure, her sisters and brothers didn’t seem to have qualms about asking, but Kylie didn’t want to add any strife.
Prosperity. Her parents never had it, but God had given Kylie a smart mind. She was a clear thinker; school came easy to her, especially math. “I know writing isn’t my strength.” She opened the refrigerator and stuck the leftovers inside. “But despite what Professor Nickels thinks, I won an award in high school for my persuasive letter about the dangers of strip-mining, and I did well in all my college English classes.” No, her parents had never prospered, but God had given Kylie the necessary talents to help her family.
Her mother’s eyes, gleaming with pride when Amanda announced she was having twins, slipped into Kylie’s thoughts. A vision of her daddy hugging Mama and thanking her for supper followed swiftly behind. They’d always said God had blessed them beyond measure. Kylie never quite understood them.
And honor. If she had anything to do with it, Kylie would never have a child of hers receive a free lunch. Her son would never be sponsored for field trips or extracurricular sports. Her daughter would never wear someone else’s prom dress. Instead, Kylie would be the one to give those things to someone who needed it. She’d pay back all that she’d received as a child. “Isn’t that what God calls us to do? When we’ve been given, we pull ourselves up, and then give more than we’ve received.”
Something sounded wrong with her words. They felt funny. She couldn’t put her finger on it. After throwing the food wrappers in the trash, she scraped the plates and placed them in the dishwasher. She wiped off the counters, then grabbed a bottle of water from the refrigerator and headed back to the couch.
She picked up the slip of paper and read it again. “ ‘He who pursues righteousness and love finds life, prosperity and honor,’ Proverbs 21:21.” Flipping to the reference in her Bible, she added, “My reasons for working hard have always been driven by righteousness and love. I don’t know why this verse keeps tripping me up.”
Kylie devoured the chapter. Each verse, a nugget of wisdom from Solomon, spoke of many things from the wicked to the mocker to the ill-tempered wife. Verse two pricked her heart and she read it again. “All a man’s ways seem right to him, but the Lord weighs the heart.”
“My ways seem right to me, Lord.” She gazed out her window, past the parking area, past the other homes, and toward the horizon. The land was flat, but she could see the tips of trees in the distance. A clear, blue sky blanketed their tops. “What is the weight of my heart, Lord?”
Her parents, her siblings, they seemed to line up in her soul, displaying their peace in good times and bad times. The Nelsons, gracious and thankful, spilled into her mind. Contentment gleamed from their faces.
Sweet, kind Ryan flooded her thoughts. She had no idea where he got his means, but he always gave of all he had. His heart overflowed with generosity. She relished every moment with him. He never despaired over financial gain, for right or wrong reasons.
It wasn’t financial stability they needed. It was God, plain and simple. Their walk with the Lord made them rich, not poor. Proverbs 22:2 screamed at her from the page. “Rich and poor have this in common: The Lord is the Maker of them all.”
Kylie fell to her knees in front of the couch. “Forgive me, Jesus. My pursuit has been my own. In my pride and self-centeredness, I let the world’s standards dictate my worth. I have been a fool.”
A tear, warm and refreshing, slipped down her cheek. She clasped her hands and lifted her eyes toward the ceiling. “My life belongs to You. My past. My present. My future. In poverty or wealth or somewhere in between, I don’t want to live another moment concerned about the wealth of this world.”
Scriptures from Matthew filled her. “God, I don’t want to store up treasures from this earth. You are my treasure, Lord. Weigh my heart, and find me full of You.”
She stood, walked to her room, and grabbed her cell phone from the shelf. Searching her directory, she found Candy’s number then pushed it. Candy’s voice sang, “Hello,” over the line. Kylie inhaled as peace enveloped her soul. “Candy, I’m going to take that position with the ministry.”
Sixteen
Ryan couldn’t get Kylie off his mind as he stocked cans of green beans and corn on the shelves at God’s Pantry. She’d changed over the last few weeks. Eager to raise money for the missions trip, she’d participated in a bake sale and a parents’ night out with members of the team. Her eyes danced, and smiles warmed her lips on a regular basis, and Ryan longed to be with her more. He’d been watching for the right time to tell her about his reasons for not working, but he hadn’t had a moment alone with her.
Welcoming a couple, Gramps opened the door, and a gust of cool November wind swept through the small building. “Awful cold to not even be Thanksgiving,” Gramps’s voice boomed.
“Sure is,” a man responded.
“Hello. How are you?”
A familiar female voice said, “Did your grandson come today?”
Ryan strolled down the aisle to find Kylie’s mom and a man standing beside Gramps. “Mrs. Andrews, it’s so good to see you again.” Ryan extended his hand. She grabbed him in a hug instead.
“It’s good to see you, too. This is my husband, Richard.” She patted the man’s shoulder.
“You must be Ryan.” Mr. Andrews shook his hand, then turned his head to cough. The slump in his shoulders gave away his fatigue and illness. Ryan could tell he’d been a strong man, but black lung was taking its toll on him. He stopped coughing and looked back at Ryan. “Lorma can’t seem to stop talking about you.”
“How’s Kylie?” she asked. “We seem to be playing phone tag.”
“She’s great. Working hard to raise money for the missions trip and going to school.”
“The last I talked to her, she found out she wasn’t getting that job she wanted. We’ve been praying for her.” Mrs. Andrews clucked her tongue. “Kylie worries something fierce over having things all laid out nice.”
Mr. Andrews cleared his throat. “Life just isn’t always like that. Praise the Lord, He’s in charge.”
“Amen to that.” Gramps patted Richard’s back.
Mrs. Andrews handed a sack to Ryan. “We came to give back the
cans and boxed foods we didn’t use.”
“You didn’t need to do that.” Ryan tried to hand it back to her.
She lifted her hand. “No. The good Lord blesses us with what we need each time we need it. Richard’s disability checks are coming in now.”
“That’s right,” Mr. Andrews interrupted. He reached into his shirt pocket and pulled out a check. “There’s a time to give and a time to receive. We needed to receive from this pantry for a while. Now God’s allowing us to give a bit back.”
“You’re a wonderful couple.” Gramps accepted the check.
“I’d like to ask one thing in return.” Mrs. Andrews looked up at Ryan. “Can I have another hug?”
Ryan laughed as he leaned down and embraced the older woman. She whispered, “Take care of my Kylie.”
“Always.” He released her, and she smiled and nodded her head.
Ryan watched as the couple made their way to their car. Though Mrs. Andrews was the driver, her husband opened the door for her and then walked to the passenger side. She leaned over and kissed his cheek before buckling her seat belt and starting the car.
“Kylie has a great family,” said Gramps as he sat to write down the donation in the ledger.
“Yes, she does.”
“Did you notice that Richard’s coat has seen better days?” A sparkle lit Gramps’s eyes.
“You know, Gramps, I hadn’t noticed, but now that you mention it, Mrs. Andrews’s coat wasn’t in too great of shape, either.”
“Hmm.” Gramps hunched over the desk and calculated some numbers.
Ryan pushed a cart filled with laundry detergents that needed to be placed on the shelf. “We’ll just have to take care of that.”
❧
“God,” Kylie mumbled, “I’m trusting in You.” She arranged the Christmas-colored hair bows on the table for the craft bazaar. Having raised only a third of the money she needed for the missions trip, Kylie was depending on a good turnout today to even consider making the missions trip.
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