by Em Petrova
Tearing his mouth away, he dipped his lips to the shell of her ear. She wore a tiny gold star in one ear and a moon in the other. His mouth watered to taste them both. He nibbled one, and she dropped her head into his palm. The elegant line of her throat urged him to taste that too, and he blazed a path down it and across her collarbones, up to her other earlobe.
She gripped his shoulders, eyes closed and her mouth open on a gasp. Christ, her reactions to him were all he’d ever fucking imagined and then some.
He walked her through the door, pivoted her to the kitchen counter and lifted her. She weighed way less than his military pack. When he settled her in front of him, their gazes locked for a heartbeat before he bracketed her face in his hands and went for her mouth again.
This kiss blurred too many lines. Crossed boundaries he told himself countless times that summer to stay on the right side of. Either the understanding they were both older and able to handle his advances came into play, or his brain really had been scrambled from the accident.
He angled her to plunge his tongue deeper, and she issued soft moans that drove him up a wall.
He knew lust.
This was something else.
With a burning need to hear her cry out for him, he ran his hands over her shoulders and to her breasts, cupping them, kneading them. Finding her nipples and plucking them. She cried out, spurring him to explore.
When he slipped his hand down her body and under her dress, she went still. Hardly breathing. His heart slammed in his chest, and his cock swelled past the elastic waist of his sweats.
Sweet Jesus, this woman responded to him and stripped away all the self-control he’d spent years honing.
As his fingertips met the warm curve of her inner thigh, he flicked his stare to hers. Whatever question she saw in his eyes, she answered with a hot rasp.
Unable to stop now, he walked his fingers to her panties and rubbed the damp cotton.
“River!” She dropped her head back so he saw the thrum of her pulse in her throat.
He splayed her legs wider for him and breached the crotch of her panties to stroke her slick flesh.
Christ, slick didn’t begin to describe it—she was soaked for him. How long had she been this way? Aching…wanting?
Only an ass would make her wait so long, when he could have been fingering her to countless orgasms over the course of days.
She cried out as he edged a finger inside her and brushed the pad of his thumb over her straining bud. He wanted to strip her down and lick every goddamn inch of her. But he barely sank his finger to the knuckle before she pulsated around him.
She came in a wave of shaking tremors at the scantest of touches. Knowing he’d driven her so far that she couldn’t hold anything back ripped a primal noise from him.
As her pussy contracted on his finger, he pressed down on her clit. A squeak left her, and she jerked forward and found his mouth.
She swiped her tongue over his, twitching, coming apart for what felt to be endless seconds.
Tenderness bowed him toward her. He lashed her tight to his body and gently drew his wet finger free of her folds. Slicking her wetness up her seam to her clit, he pulled one more shudder from Sascha.
His best friend’s little sister.
Guilt tumbled into his gut, a hot coal. What would Ethan say if he walked in on them right now?
Goddammit, Hep. I trusted you.
I know you did. I’m sorry.
He withdrew his hand and broke the kiss.
With a major force of will, he stepped back from her.
Her blue gaze blazed with passion and a need he wanted to fill.
“River?”
“I can’t stay here, Sascha. I’ve gotta go.”
In all his years in combat, he never ran like a pussy, yet here he tried to escape this beautiful little woman who fired his blood and made him believe he could have good things.
He twisted and walked out, battling the dizziness hitting his system and the urge to go back and claim her.
The way she wanted him to.
Fuck—needed him to.
He saw it in the depths of her eyes.
Her feet hit the floor behind him as she jumped off the counter. He continued out of the kitchen, intending to grab his bag and call for a cab to his mother’s place.
Scratch that—to the airport. He needed more distance between him and Sascha, and a few miles wouldn’t do it.
“River! Dammit, stop and look at me!”
When he didn’t, she grabbed his shoulder with more force than he ever expected from her and spun him to her. Anger replaced the passion in her eyes.
Good. She should be angry. Ethan would be.
“You’re just walking away after this?” She bunched a fist and set it on her hip.
He bowed his head. “I shouldn’t have touched you.”
Her jaw dropped, but he didn’t stick around to see the pain fill her eyes. He strode to the guest room and began throwing things into his bag.
Chapter Four
Sascha’s insides still quivered from her intense release, but all the endorphins coursing through her veins quickly faded to anger.
River seriously planned to leave.
His bag sat by the door, and he bent over, putting his boots on. How he planned to get far when he visibly swayed on his feet, she had no clue.
Seeing his bag there brought a heavy sense of déjà vu of Ethan leaving. She’d only seen her brother once more, after he graduated from basic training and before he shipped overseas.
What if that happened with River too? The man did dangerous work—his body a map of the action he’d seen. He could lose his life and she’d never get a chance to tell him how she’d always felt about him.
Or how those feelings flared to life the minute she heard he needed her.
A lump stuck in her throat, holding back tears, words and a few screams she wanted to emit. Any protest felt futile—why should he listen to her and stay? Even if she promised to distance herself on the opposite side of the house, River made it clear he thought they’d gone beyond the point of return.
Finished tying his boot, he straightened very slowly. His eyelids fluttered, but he didn’t close his eyes against the dizziness as she’d seen him do before.
He’d called a cab, and the horn blast outside the house made her bite back a cry.
River picked up his bag and held it by the shorter handles. For a terrifying moment, she thought he’d walk out without saying goodbye or even looking at her.
He faced her, throat working. “Thank you for everything you’ve done, Sascha.”
Heart thudding, she nodded.
“Take care of yourself.”
“You too…” she whispered, mouth dry.
He opened the door and walked out of her life.
Just like that.
He’d kissed her, made her feel alive again. God, he made her come in seconds of touching her. Then he flipped some switch and shut down completely on her.
She watched him take the stairs at a slower pace than she knew he would if he weren’t suffering from his concussion.
I’m never going to see him again.
The realization struck like a zap of lightning.
“River, wait!”
He turned.
“You forgot something!”
She rushed through her office like a tornado on steroids, snatching up her laptop, video camera and a tangle of cords. Then she sprinted through her bedroom, tossing garments into a bag. On her way out, she grabbed her purse along with a pair of cowgirl boots and her house keys.
When she slammed the door behind her, with all her junk in hand, River turned to look at her.
She trundled down the porch steps and hit the sidewalk at a jog. At the curb, she reached around him, whipped open the cab door and jumped in.
He gaped at her.
“If you’re going, I’m going.”
His jaw dropped. “Sascha. You can’t just pick up like
a gypsy and take off.”
“I’ve got all I need. I’ll buy the rest.”
“You don’t even know where I’m going.”
“Doesn’t matter.”
The cab driver threw her an amused look.
She met River’s eyes. “Get in. I need an adventure, and you need someone to take care of you.”
When he hesitated, she snagged the duffel from his hand and threw it to the floor at her feet. Then she caught his hand and hauled him into the cab with her.
“You can’t leave your home,” he argued.
“Everything’s locked up. Rent’s paid. Dishes are even done. It’s fine.”
He gaped at her. “What will you do in Alaska?”
She didn’t bat an eye at hearing his destination. “Get a place. Continue my thesis at the University of Alaska.”
“Can you do that?”
He didn’t close the cab door, as if keeping it open meant they couldn’t drive away and start this exciting—and frightening—journey she chose on a pipe dream and the hope of more kisses. All she knew was that she felt more alive right this second than she had in years.
“I don’t honestly know, but I’ll try. I need a change of scenery. Besides, you can’t just kiss a girl and walk away. I plan to collect on the rest. I’ll consider what happened in the kitchen as down payment.”
The cab driver snorted, and River narrowed his eyes at the man, who stared out the windshield as if he hadn’t heard every single word.
“You’re wasting good money on this cab, River. Close the door.”
He gave a shake of his head. Then, to her astonishment, a huge grin plastered over his previously solemn face. Hearing that door shut, elation hit her, and she issued a carefree laugh.
It was a crazy move, but what did she have to lose?
Maybe everything.
Or maybe there would be a lot more to be gained.
River brushed the pad of his thumb across her lips.
Her heart nearly stopped.
He turned his attention to the front seat. “Drive,” he instructed the driver.
As they pulled away from the curb and left her house behind, he slipped an arm across her shoulders and tucked her against his side.
Right where she wanted to be.
She laughed again, and his eyes shone with affection as he stared down at her. “I can’t believe I did that.”
“I can. I knew you way back when, remember?”
Her heart gave a hard jog. “I remember. I pretty much threw myself at you, didn’t I?”
Those smile lines she’d missed so damn much over the past few days appeared at the corners of his hard lips. “You did.”
“I’m certain I just blackmailed you with sex too.”
The cab driver’s shoulders shook on a silent laugh, and River shot him a glare the man failed to see, since his attention centered on the road.
“I must be crazy, letting you come with me.”
“You’ve been trapped in bed for days. And I’ve been trapped in…” She waved a hand, trying to capture the words to emote her feelings. “Trapped in the same routine. You can’t imagine what a creativity killer that is.”
“So you took off to break the boredom?” The corner of his lips quirked.
“Something like that.” She smiled and realized how genuine it felt. How long had she been hiding behind a brave smile she didn’t feel?
“Sascha…”
She held her breath, waiting for him to kick her out on the curb or tell her this wasn’t going to work.
“I think you need this as much as I do.”
Relief rushed past her lips in a happy sigh.
He craned his neck toward the driver and gave him directions, “To the airport.”
A new hope lifted inside her. Until this instant, she didn’t realize how much weight lay on her shoulders. Thinking back, she had no recollection of when the concrete stone weight became such a part of her. That day Ethan and River left? When her momma became absent in her life, stuck in the past filled with better days when she had both her children?
She closed her eyes and breathed in River’s clean, masculine scent.
If she only remained by his side for a short while, so be it. She could claim she truly lived. Permanent or temporary didn’t matter right now. She only cared about River’s arm around her and the way he made her feel as if the sun finally burst through the clouds and bathed her in warmth.
He brushed his lips over her temple, and she squeezed her eyes shut on the sheer thrill.
She reached up and cradled his jaw. “Could you really have walked away so easily?”
He fell silent for a minute while the car bumped over a series of potholes. After a short spell, he shook his head. “I would have come back, Sascha.”
A smug smile spread over her lips. “I knew it.”
He peered at her. “Did you now?”
“No. But I hoped. And hope is worth a lot, don’t you think?”
He stared at her with amazement in his eyes. “I never thought that mattered until now.”
“Honestly? Me either.” She scuffed her fingertip over the rough beard stubble on his jaw. He caught her hand and folded it in his grip as they headed to the airport.
“Penn, I need to call in a favor.” Hepburn stood out of the way of the pedestrians moving in and out of the airport.
A breeze brought the stench of car exhaust, and he found himself darting looks at people, waiting for them to whip out a weapon or reveal they were strapped with explosives.
At least bashing his head off a steering wheel hadn’t stripped the special operative out of him. When he returned to the Xtreme Ops team, he’d still be at the top of his game.
Several feet away, Sascha stood talking on the phone with her momma. He kept glancing her direction to ensure she was safe, though his inner alarms weren’t blaring and his gut instincts alerted him everything was normal.
“What is it?” Penn asked. “Are you on your feet yet?”
“Yes, though I could use a few more days.” Pushing himself felt good, but he acknowledged the fatigue bearing down on him.
“A doctor will have to clear you for duty too.”
“Of course. Listen, I need a different kind of favor. I need transport for me and a civilian.”
A beat of silence followed.
He continued, “An old friend is traveling with me. She plans to settle in Alaska for a spell. But if it’s not doable, then we’ll catch a civilian flight as soon as we can.”
“Let me see what I can do. Or what connections Cora may have.” Cora acted as the Xtreme Ops’ personal pilot as well as the love of Penn’s life. The pair just about made the rest of the team gag with the sappy looks they shared at all times of the day. After another glance at Sascha, Hepburn started to understand a little how Penn felt.
In one word: Protective.
“Call me back, man. Thanks.” He ended the call and continued to stare at Sascha’s profile.
The pink in her cheeks spoke of high emotion. It was hard to imagine the things being said in a conversation with her momma, especially after overhearing some of the last one.
First, he’d taken Ethan to the Army with him. Now he planned to sweep the woman’s daughter off to Alaska.
The whole crazy notion should require a lot more thought than either of them put into it. But weirdly, he saw no other path. She was coming with him—period.
He pocketed his phone and hooked his thumb in the loop of his jeans he’d changed into before leaving.
What to do with Sascha once they reached their destination? She’d always been his buddy’s off-limits little sister. That night before they left for the Army, he’d nearly slipped and taken her. When he set eyes on her again, it felt as if no time had passed between them.
Earlier today, giving in to his desires—and hers too—had scared the hell out of him. Faced with a choice to leave or stay, he’d chosen to leave.
But she refused to let him run a
way that easy. She knew what she wanted even if he struggled to understand his mind on the matter.
He couldn’t think beyond arriving on Alaskan soil. If they didn’t pick up where they’d left off in the kitchen, at least he could help Sascha find the adventure she’d been languishing for.
While he looked on, she ended the call. Her shoulders slumped as she turned to look at him. A few people milled between them toward the airport entrance, but their gazes remained locked.
Taking off in long strides, he crossed to her. Pain crashed in waves in her eyes, and he caught her hand as he hovered over her.
“Your mom’s upset?” He pitched his voice low.
She nodded. “Very upset. I…”
“If you don’t think you should go, I’ll ride back with you and drop you off.”
“No. I want to come with you. More than that, I need it. A change of scenery and something to make me feel as if all I do isn’t a waste.” She gave a shake of her head. “I can’t explain it other than to say I have to get out of this town. It’s…crushing me.”
He’d felt that way back in the day.
“She loves you, and she’ll understand.”
“I hate that our relationship’s broken. I’ve tried, River. I have. She’s just not able to see past Ethan’s death.”
His chest weighted. “I’m sorry for that.”
She jerked her stare to his. “You can’t possibly believe either of us think it’s your fault!”
He didn’t want to discuss it, least of all here in the open. “Come on. Let’s get something to drink while I wait for my captain to get us transport.”
“Do you think he can?”
“I’m not sure. If not, there are other ways to reach Alaska. Bus…train…hot air balloon, maybe.”
His teasing did the trick of putting a smile on her face. She brushed her fingers through her hair, ruffling the short strands that suited her so well. Tenderness flooded into him, filling so much of him that he stopped dwelling on how his head felt and focused on how she must feel.
Keeping her hand in his grasp, he led her through the airport doors, where he bought her an iced coffee and they sat on a bench watching people.
“Do you think any of them are fleeing to Alaska?” She drew the straw to her lips.
