“Slow down, Olivia,” he says, looking at the almost empty cup with astonishment and concern. “Are you sure you don’t want to sit down for a bit? With how much you took and how very new this is to you, I’m not so sure—”
“Shhh, Mateo.” I put my finger to his lips and mentally frown at my weird action. “You’re thinking too much.” My gaze flitters to the stairs. “How long does this take to kick in?”
“Depends on how experienced you are. Could be half an hour all the way up to an hour—” I stumble on my right leg and shift to my left. My arms shoot out, and he holds my elbows with a shake of his head. “But for you, I’d say a few minutes.”
“Great.” I smile and take the cup from him and down the rest of it, shivering when the ice hits my sensitive teeth. I cough a bit into my elbow and give him the empty cup back. “I’m going to go use the bathroom. See you around. Thank you for the drink. That was…fun.” I giggle and wave at him before turning and bumping into a guy.
“Wait, Olivia. I don’t think you should—”
I turn around and put my finger to my lips. “Shhh, you think too much. I’ve got to pee,” I lie.
What I really have to do is tell his cousin off.
I push through a small crowd that blocks the stairs and take one wooden step at a time. My head feels like it’s tipping to the left, so I clutch my hand around the railing and lean against the deep green wall as I walk. The vibrations from the loud music reverberate through the thick wall and makes my head rumble. A raspy giggle leaves my lips as I allow the beat to rhythmically move my head. By the time I finally arrive on the second floor, my right ear is humming, and my head feels less heavy on the left side.
Now’s the hard part—finding the Grey boy.
“Grey!” I opt for screaming and searching rooms. The first three I open on the right side are occupied by two—one with three—nasty people doing explicit things I shan’t repeat in my head. Shan’t. What a funny word combined with shouldn’t and can’t. I giggle while my hand is curved around the bathroom door knob, aka the place I found him and that redhead girl doing it—something—the first time. With any luck, they’ll be in here.
But when I open the door, there’s no one in it. I frown and am turning away, ready to give up, when I hear the very slight whisper of a moan.
I lift my head and eye the door across the hall. I get up and wobble for a second before pushing myself forward. I twist the golden knob and stumble inside. It’s pitch dark, but I don’t need light to see that it’s him…and her. She’s on him, moaning as she—
An abrupt burp from me announces my presence. She stops, and I hear a very low and dark and menacing—
“Mind closing the door, Princess?”
I freeze. I find anger filling up my every pore, and I spit, “Did you treat Rose as shitty as you have treated me? If so, no wonder you’re all alone now, screwing…her. And by the way, I have night terrors that could possibly haunt me for the rest of my life, asshole.” With a scowl ripping its way across my face, I step back and slam the door closed.
Chapter Seventeen
“She’s done it again! Who is this girl?” screams the boy to my right.
I am currently playing what these people call Beer Pong. The game is pretty simple. You aim and throw a ping pong ball into one of the five cups of beer of the opposing team. If yours sinks into one of theirs, they drink and vice versa. Apparently, I’m a master at it. But it isn’t all that hard to be good; I just calculate angles and throw the ball. It’s fascinating I can be good at something this mathematical while drunk.
“I’m Olivia.” I smile at him and turn to the agitated couple on the other side of the table. “And let me help you out.”
I pick up one of my six cups and down the bittersweet beer. The people who have been watching the game cheer me on and holler. Mixed with the thrumming beat of the music blasting through the house vibrating through my body and the cool but tangy drink hitting my stomach’s pit, I feel on top of the world. I never knew drinking could be so much fun. If I had known before, I would have started a long time ago.
When I see the empty bottom, I smack it down onto the ping-pong table. They whistle and clap and shout in victory as the losers roll their eyes. I soak it all up and twirl in a circle with my hands pumping in the air.
“I don’t know if I should be more surprised at how good you are at this or the fact that I’m actually impressed by you,” Julia says with a slight slant of her lips. Is that a smile? I squeal and clap my hands, and she chuckles, and I jump up and down. I actually got her to smile at me! I wonder if I can make it happen again but sober…most likely not, but I did it once, so I can hope.
“Impressed, definitely impressed.” Jaimie laughs and tugs at my arm. “Now let’s go dance. I love this song.” She takes Julia’s hand, and before I know it, I’m being dragged through the crowd and across the hall. “Out of the way people, out of the way!” Jaimie yells and hoots as we slide through dancing bodies.
I apologize after her. Funny, even drunk I’m still polite. Well, that sucks. I don’t want to be my normal self. Not tonight. I told Grey off, and now I want to have fun, meaning no polite me.
I turn to a girl holding a shot in her mouth and snatch it out of her hand. She curses at me, but I cackle and stick my tongue out and tilt my head back as I down it, then fling it into some boy’s hands as I pass him. He raises a brow at me, but I wink at him and woot with the liquid gliding down to my stomach.
We stop in the living room, and Jaimie steps onto a chair and, with wobbly legs, stands on the oak wood table. She swings her hips side to side and flashes her black hair all around, her eyes twinkling, and lips wet with vodka.
I gasp and giggle and yell at her, “What are you doing?”
“Having fun,” she answers. “Join me.” She holds her hand out, and I glance at Julia, who shrugs and looks at her girlfriend like she’s the most beautiful creature on this planet. Aw. I wish someone good looked at me like she is right now…
“I can’t stop her—but I can watch out for her,” Julia says and nods. “Go on, have fun. I guess I can watch out for you too.” A ghost of a smile dances on her lips, and I squeal, having received yet another smile from her. This night is going down in the books for best night ever!
“Okay!” I step up on the wooden chair and onto the table. “I don’t know about this…” I feel like everyone’s eyes are on me, and I instantly clam up. Maybe this isn’t a good idea…I don’t even know how to dance! I begin to step down when Jaimie grabs my shoulders and whirls me around. In these heels, which are probably only three inches to be fair, I almost fall off, but she holds me with a tight grip and smiles a lazy smile, her brown eyes hazy.
“Just dance. It doesn’t matter if you can or can’t. What does matter is that you have fun!” She shakes me a bit and sways her body side to side. “Just hold onto me and move your hips,” she instructs. I turn my head to the drunk frat guys watching, but she taps my chin and makes me look in her eyes. “Don’t worry about them—just watch me, okay?” My nod is hesitant.
The song is fast paced and bright and loud, but she has no problem with shaking her hips and pumping her hands and wildly messing with her hair. In the midst of watching and calculating her movements, I find myself bobbing my head to the music.
Before I know it, I’m mirroring her. She cheers me on, and I hear Julia clap and woot; that only makes me go even crazier. The moment she takes her hands off my shoulders, I spin and twirl my hips around and pump my fists. I may look stupid, but I don’t care. I’m having fun!
I haven’t felt so exhilarated in all my life, and I love it. I crave more. I dip down and roll back up and smack my hands onto my thighs. There are sultry whistles and cursing as I slowly step in a circle with my hands in my hair.
“That’s it—have fun, Bambi!” Jaimie cups her hands around her mouth and bops her body to the beat. I laugh and press my back to hers and dance behind her. I bite my lip and glide my hands alon
g my body and tear my cardigan off, twirl it in my hand, and throw it into the crowd of guys. They snicker, and one of them twirls it in his hand and cheers me on.
“Trust me, I’m having fun!” I yell back.
She giggles and turns me around; I don’t stop moving. I feel like a spark of energy has been set off in me, and I can’t stop dancing. And I don’t think I want to.
“I’m going to go get some water. Want some?” she yells over the music.
“I’d rather have vodka!” I yell back.
She nods. “Water it is. I like you wild, but not too wild.” She winks and taps my nose before getting down with Julia’s help.
I shrug and twirl around and continue my lively dance. I hear her and Julia talk briefly before I watch her go. Julia stays behind, saying she won’t leave me alone. I squeal for the third time at her kindness and shake my hips madly.
This is so much better than wasting my time on that prick Grey boy. I’d rather live under a kaleidoscope of vibrant colors. Pink, orange, teal, purple—anything but gray. It’s too dull of a color for my vivacious soul. I want to live in the present under this rainbow and never let go of the moment.
My hair is flying everywhere, my hips are shifting from side to side, the music is running through my body like a live wire, and my head is light of worries and doubts and repercussions. “This. Is. Fun!” I scream at the top of my lungs as I shake my head. I thread my fingers through my curly hair and ruffle it out. I swing my body around and around in circles.
A surge of enthusiasm bursts within me, and I bend my knees and jump. Unfortunately, I feel my head connect with the metal curve of the sparkling chandelier I didn’t even notice before. Pain bursts behind my eyes, and I yell in agony. A loud oompf slips out of my lips, and I close my eyes to block out the pain. My body slows down, and I topple off the table. I scream, bracing for my body to collide against the hardwood floor.
But before I could hit the ground, I’m caught in a pair of muscular arms. I open my eyes and suck in a deep breath. Black meets blue, and I groan and rub my head.
“Get away from me,” I whine and stand. I nearly buckle under my weak knees, but Grey holds me upright as Julia runs to his side.
“Is she okay?” she asks, her eyes wide.
Grey touches my head and pulls his hand back. His fingers are red. “No, she bumped her head pretty hard. She’s bleeding.”
“Put her down in one of the rooms,” Julia orders.
“No, I’m having fun,” I whine again and writhe in his hand, pushing at his neck, but he doesn’t budge. He shoots me a look of annoyance, and I stick out my tongue at him and whine some more, bending backwards, but his hands are securely around my waist. “Let me go!” I drawl, feeling blood rush to my head.
A crash sounds in the direction of the kitchen. “Fuck!” I hear Jaimie yell. Julia steps back and looks in the direction with a panicked look on her face.
“Go, I’ve got her,” Grey says.
“No, you don’t have me.” I stand up straight, and Julia is gone. I make a face and say, “You lost me when you got in that girl’s panties.”
He glares at me. “Who do you think you are to me? I fuck whoever I want to fuck,” he proclaims. Anger fills me, and my mood converts from child-like to vexation. I push away from him and scream in exasperation.
“No wonder Rose left your ass—you’re a big meanie!” I roll my tongue at him. Great. Child me is back.
His eyes grow dark, and he pushes me against the wall behind me; I whine in pain, but he smacks a hand next to my head, and I shut up. “How the fuck do you know about Rose? Huh? Who told you?” he demands. When I don’t answer him, he smacks his hand against the wall again, and I gasp.
“Who the fuck told you?” he barks again. His hand is on my neck, and I notice how red his eyes are.
I’m scared. I am so freaking scared, and I do the last thing I could possibly think to do—I cry. And I cry hard. Tears leak out of my eyes, and my heart swells.
“Get away from me!” I push at him, but he doesn’t budge. I lean forward and smack him, hard. He curses and holds his jaw, breathing deeply in irritation. I push away from him and run into the crowd yelling, “Jerk!” I groan and push through people, disregarding their displeasure.
I wobble once I’m outside on the porch. I need to sit down, but there are no chairs on the patio. Why aren’t there any chairs here? My head is spinning; I feel like I’ve been on a carousel for an eternity, and I want to get off.
I grip the banister and spot a chair that’s supposed to be on the patio, on the grass, and stumble over to it. I fall onto it, facing the black canvas with dots of sparkling stars, and smile. Now I understand those girls who stumble around in heels.
How dare he hold me like that? He could have choked me—maybe even killed me! And the anger in his eyes. Oh God. I shiver just thinking about it. I’ve never been so scared in my life. More tears trail down my face, and I place my hands on my forehead and scream and kick in pure frustration.
I want to tell him off again. I love the feeling of my veins throbbing under my neck and the feeling of satisfaction in watching his face drop. But now is not a good time. Just look at how he acted a minute ago like a maniac.
I sigh and close my eyes. I want to sleep and forget this night ever happened. I’m beginning to hate myself this way. However, I have to admit: I do feel super freaking confident like this, and I kind of love it.
A heavy weight suddenly lands on my outstretched feet, and I yell in pain and sit up straight. I push my hair against my forehead. It’s some guy. He’s wearing a basketball hat on backwards, a pair of beat-up Converse, and a wicked smile displayed on his face.
“Move, dude,” I whine and bounce my knees to signal for him to get off of me.
“I much rather sit here, with you…” he drawls, eyelids half shut. His eyes are dark green and very bloodshot. He’s drunk. And I am too, but I’m also very irritable right now.
“More like on me,” I grumble. “Off.” I bounce my knees some more and swing my arms out to push him off, but he grabs my wrists and pulls me closer to his face. He’s practically drowned himself in liquor. I feel my heart beat out of its pace when his hand glides around my waist, inching toward my butt.
“I saw you inside. You have some sexy ass moves. Want me to show you mine…?” he slurs.
“No, thank you.” I nervously laugh and push against him, but he drags me into his chest and kisses my neck. I pant rapidly and feel myself sober up as I realize what’s happening.
“G-get off of me, right now!” I yell and ball my hands in fists, but he ignores me. “Help! Someone help me!” I scream on the top of my lungs, but mixed with the shouts inside the house and the deafening music, I doubt any one hears.
He pushes me back, and I wince when my head hits the old wood. “Shut up and let me show you my moves, little dancer.” His large white teeth and dark eyes are the only thing I see as my vision begins to go in and out. In and out. I try to push him away, but I find myself in a limbo where my limbs are weak and my head is spinning. His body feels like a hundred weights placed on my chest. I can’t breathe.
I whine and wheeze as his hands slide under my top and navigate down and into my pants. My eyes widen, and my heart picks up speed. It feels like it’s in my throat.
“Help!” I try to scream, but he clamps a hand around my mouth. My screams are muffled, and my eyes turn into a kaleidoscope showing images of his eyes, red and green and black. “Get off of me!” I mumble under his rough palm.
“Get the fuck off of her!” a familiar voice booms in rage before the lanky boy is pulled off. I sit up quickly and regret it. All the blood in my veins swishes around in my head and falls back into place. I gasp for air and cough as I fall onto the wet grass. Mud grazes my face, and I slowly turn around and wince as I pull myself back to sit against the damp chair.
I open my eyes and am shocked to see Grey pummeling his fist into the guy’s face. His teeth are bared, jaw clenc
hed, and his eyes are wide and black and full of rage. He is full of rage. It’s as if the guy stole something precious from me, which he would have if Grey hadn’t stepped in and stopped him. My head is spinning, but I manage to stand and walk over to them.
“Stop,” I say weakly.
Grey doesn’t seem to hear me.
He just keeps punching him, over and over again. It finally settles in that if I don’t stop him right now, he will kill this guy and he will go to jail. And I can’t let that happen. Even if he did take his rage out on me earlier, he doesn’t deserve it.
“Grey, I said to stop! Stop hitting him!” I grab his raised bloody fist before he can strike again. He whips his head at me, and I jump and let go of his hand, flinching. His face drops.
“I wouldn’t hit you, Liv.” He wipes blood off his lips.
“Don’t call me that!” I shout, balling my hands into fists.
“Are we really going to fight about this when I can be beating his face in?” he snarls, nodding to the unconscious guy beneath him.
I roll my eyes and step away from him. “Do whatever you want. I’m going back to fun town, boring boy.” I stick my tongue out at him and begin to walk back to the house, but he grips my wrist and twirls me back into his chest. He stares at me with an unreadable expression, and I push away from him. “Leave me alone!”
“No way,” he says and pulls me away from the grass.
“Let go of me!” I shout. He bends down and nuzzles his face near my mouth. “What is wrong with you?” I put my hand on his mouth and push his hand away, but he snatches my wrist and puts my hand behind my back.
“How drunk are you right now?” he asks, annoyed.
“I am not drunk,” I protest.
He narrows his eyes; he doesn’t believe me, and he yanks at my wrist. “How. Drunk. Are. You?” he reiterates. I want to lie and say I’m not drunk, but the look in his eyes and his fingers around my skin say not to.
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