“It’s his way of deflecting real emotions and issues. He plays himself up to be a big party boy with nothing under the surface.”
“But there’s lots under the surface,” Steele finished for me. He stood there as if wanting to say more, but he didn’t. “Well, I’d better be getting some rest before the game.” He started down the hall and half turned. “If you ever want tickets for a game…”
“I’ll be sure to let you know.” I grinned at him. I might take him up on that. Watching Steele on the ice in the flesh rather than on TV would be a treat better than a hot fudge sundae, neither of which was good for me, but when did that stop me?
Longingly, I watched him walk down the hall to his bedroom. I had work to do, and I would not be joining him in bed. He needed his rest, and I needed the money these alterations would pay me. Rent would be due soon enough.
Chapter Twenty
Ask Her Out
~~Steele~~
Cin hadn’t taken me up on my offer of attending a game. In fact, she didn’t mention it again. A week had passed since the day I’d made the offer, during which time the team went on a three-game road trip and returned the following Friday.
The day we returned, I slept most of the morning and had every intention of staying home that night and doing nothing. Road trips were taxing, especially ones back east, and I need to unwind and rest. We’d won two out of three games, and I’d had my best game of the year so far. Something clicked on that road trip, and I took my game to the next level. Things were looking up for me as far as my professional life. My personal life was another story, and nothing had been resolved while I’d been away. Cin and I had texted a few times during the week, nothing dirty, just small talk, such as asking how the dog was or her congratulating me on a win.
While I had a good road trip, Ziggy, on the other hand, played like shit. Easton and Axel had to play that much harder to make up for it. By the last game, they were exhausted and irritated as hell at Ziggy. Ziggy just shrugged and acted as if nothing bothered him. But I now knew better. He was bothered, and he hid it well.
Early evening, I was going stir-crazy, which was unusual for me. I was a homebody most of the time. Ziggy was gone, probably partying, and I was all alone. Despite being a loner, tonight I didn’t want to be alone.
I pulled on my coat and walked the two blocks to the Blue Dog. Much to my dismay, Cin wasn’t behind the bar tonight. Some guy I’d never seen was there.
I ordered a beer and paid him, sitting on my stool and wondering what to do next. I was bummed Cin wasn’t here.
“Hey, where’s Cin tonight?”
“She asked for the night off, so I’m working for her.” The man turned away, not inviting any further conversation.
Cin never took off Friday and Saturday nights. Those were her best tip nights, and money was tight. A possibility for her absence occurred to me, and my heart sank. And I mean sank. It sank so low my gut ached. I’d never felt physical pain over the loss of someone who wasn’t family. This foreign emotion caught me off guard.
Cin might be on a date.
She wouldn’t go out with that loser Tug again, would she? I knew his type. He treated women like shit and was verbally if not physically abusive. Cin deserved better than that.
She deserved…
I stopped right there. No, I was not going there. Cin and I would be a disaster together for more than a week or so. Once the sex wasn’t a novelty anymore, we’d be at each other’s throats.
After one beer, I left the bar. There wasn’t any excuse to stay. My one reason was out on a date with some unknown asshole, most likely.
I entered the apartment, shocked to find Ziggy sitting on the coach channel-surfing with Herc lying next to him. They both flicked their gazes in my direction and went back to what they were doing, Herc snoring and Ziggy surfing.
“What are you doing home?”
“I live here,” Ziggy said simply.
“Duh. But it’s Friday night. Why are you home?”
“Gotta recharge the batteries and the dick once in a while, dude.”
I grimaced at him. Ziggy never needed a recharge. He was constantly charged all the time, every hour of every day. No one understood how he kept going as much as he burned his candle at both ends, but he did. Maybe the partying was finally catching up to him. He did have a crappy road trip.
I studied him closely, trying to figure out what might be in that head of his. I usually read people well, but I drew a blank on this guy.
Ziggy ignored me and flipped between two hockey games on TV. I noted the empty beer bottles on the coffee table. When he noticed me glaring at them, he leapt to his feet, gathered them up, and tossed them in the pantry’s recycle bin.
“Sorry, man,” he apologized, almost contrite.
“If you’re sorry, why don’t you pick up your mess before you piss me off?”
“I fucking said I was sorry,” he snapped then immediately sobered. “Sorry.”
“What’s wrong with you? You’re home on Friday night. You’re grouchy. You just played the worst, most lethargic set of games I’ve known you to play.”
“Nothing.”
“Nothing? So you played like shit because you felt like it?”
“I have a lot on my mind. That’s all.”
I sat down next to him and propped my feet on the coffee table. Herc shifted so his chin rested on my thigh, and I absently patted his head. Once again, I frowned at the colorful pillows decorating my stark furniture. I liked my monochromatic life. Cin didn’t do monochromatic, and especially not black and white. There I went, my mind drifting to Cin once again. I forced my focus back to Ziggy.
“Anything I can do?” I asked, allowing my concern to flavor my tone.
“Nothing you can help with.” He didn’t take his eyes off the TV. Instead, he attempted to dismiss me, but I wasn’t that easily dismissed. Something was wrong. Ziggy would never be one of my best buds, but he was a teammate, and his problems affected my team.
“I’m here, you know, if you need anything.”
“Okay,” he muttered.
“I am. I’m here.”
“I can’t talk to you. You’re so fucking perfect, and I’m a screwup. I don’t need to be judged by your standards. I’ve tried like hell to live up to them and everyone else’s, and I fucking can’t.”
“I get it,” I admitted, surprising both of us.
His expression revealed he didn’t believe me. Not one bit. “While you’re trying to get me to bare my soul, why don’t you bare yours? What’s up with you and Cin?”
“Nothing.” My answer wasn’t a complete lie. I didn’t really know what was up with us or if anything was.
“You’re fucking into her.”
I shrugged. I was into her. It did me no good to deny the obvious. He wouldn’t believe me if I did. I was formulating my response when our doorbell rang and saved the day. A few minutes later, Cave and another case of beer were sitting in my living room. Cave settled in as if he lived here. He always acted like that. The guy had zero sense of boundaries or common courtesy. He looked from me to a scowling Ziggy and back to me. One brow shot upward, I shrugged in response.
“Where’s Cin?” Cave asked. “I was hoping for a home-cooked meal.”
“She’s out,” Ziggy said grumpily without elaborating. I was champing at the bit to ask what he knew, but I’d play into his earlier accusations. “There’s leftovers in the fridge. Help yourself.”
Cave didn’t need a second invitation. He leapt to his feet, and moments later, I heard the microwave running.
Now was my chance. “Why did Cin take the night off?” I hoped I sounded casually interested, like a friend would be.
Ziggy grinned slyly. “How do you know she’s not at work?”
My face was burning up, and Ziggy’s grin grew broader. “You’re not fooling anyone. Why don’t you just ask her out?” Ziggy said as he guzzled an entire bottle of beer and popped the top off another from the six-
pack sitting on the coffee table. I got up to get one of my IPAs out of the refrigerator.
“Ask who out?” Cave said as he passed me with a heaping plate of vegetarian spaghetti. He sprawled on the couch next to Herc, who suddenly found him the most fascinating person in the room. So much for being my buddy. And Cave had taken my seat too.
I was momentarily distracted by the water rings on the glass tabletop. I hurried forward to wipe the glass clean with a napkin.
“Cin. Hyacinth,” Ziggy answered.
“Yeah, why don’t you ask her out?” Cave said, joining our conversation uninvited. “It’s obvious to anyone with a brain you two are hot for each other.
“No shit. They practically salivate when they see each other.”
“You’re both delusional. Why would I ask her out? We can’t stand each other.”
Ziggy and Cave laughed as if I’d said something outrageously hilarious, which I hadn’t.
“What’s so funny?”
“If you think we’re dumb fucks who don’t pay attention to anything but women and partying, you’re wrong, buddy. We see everything.” Ziggy grabbed a beer from the six-pack and popped off the top.
I truly doubted that. I’d been really careful. We’d both been careful making sure there wasn’t anything to see between Cin and me. Yeah, we had some sexual chemistry going, but that was between us. No one else would notice that, especially not these two guys who were as shallow as the beer remaining in their beer bottles.
“You’re both idiots. You know I don’t really date during the season.”
“Yeah, what’s up with that? Getting a little would probably be good for you. Relax you and all that shit,” Cave said with a mouthful of food. The guy was disgusting.
“I don’t need you two telling me what to do with my life. I get enough of that from my mother.”
“At least you have one,” Cave muttered.
I turned to say something, but he’d turned away from me, ignoring me.
Before I pursued his response any further, I heard a key in the door. Herc leapt to his feet, scrambling on the hardwood floors and in full barking mode. Halfway there, his butt started wiggling and his bark turned to a whine. Cin was home. If I had a tail, I’d probably be wagging it too and making as much of a fool out of myself as her dog was.
She walked into the living room, and my head automatically swiveled toward her. One of the guys let out a snort. I snapped my head back in their direction, but they wore twin innocent expressions.
Cin stopped and swung her gaze from Ziggy to Cave to me. She narrowed her eyes and zeroed in on me, like this was my fault, whatever this was. I was immediately defensive.
“What’s going on?” She addressed me directly, and I heard another snicker from the peanut gallery. I shot them another withering look, as if they cared.
“Nothing. Why?” If I didn’t sound guilty, I don’t know who would, but I hadn’t done a damn thing, just denied my teammates’ bullshit.
“He wants to ask you out,” Cave piped up.
“Yeah, but he’s afraid to,” Ziggy said, faking concern.
I turned on them, ready to…
To what?
To dispute their lies, of course.
“You want to ask me out?” Cin sounded incredulous. I didn’t blame her. I opened my mouth to dispute what they’d said and found I didn’t want to. I hadn’t known until this exact minute that these two morons might actually be right, and I hated that.
Cin waited patiently for my response. I looked at her, looked away, looked back. The entire room had gone silent, not one sound from a video game or anything else. I hardly heard anyone breathe. But I sure as hell heard my heart pounding. They had to hear it.
I lifted my chin imperceptibly, squared my shoulders, and stood tall in a display of male pride, which I was currently about to swallow.
“Yeah, I do want to ask you out.” I looked into her blue eyes and held her gaze, challenging her to make a joke of this. I didn’t know what the hell I was doing, but I was doing it anyway.
“You are asking me out?” She pointed at my chest and then at hers, inadvertently drawing my eyes to her really fine cleavage. Man, I had a thing for that cleavage. I swallowed hard. There was a ringing in my ears, and I forgot what I was doing. Cin cleared her throat, and Ziggy and Cave choked back laughter. In a display of who was really in control, I lifted my eyes back to hers and smiled.
“Yeah. I am,” I said with conviction.
“Well, I could use a good meal out. I accept.”
“Okay.” Now what? It’d been a long time since I’d asked a female out on an actual date. I didn’t date, because dating implied the beginning of a relationship I didn’t want.
Only now I didn’t know what I wanted.
Regardless, we were going on a date.
Chapter Twenty-One
First Date
~~Hyacinth~~
This was stupid. I was a woman of the world. I’d hitchhiked all over Europe after dropping out of high school. I’d dated guys most women would be afraid of. I’d protested and been thrown in jail. I’d done what I wanted to do without much fear of the consequences.
Life was too short to be afraid of trying something new.
Yet here I was, nervous about a date with a guy I actually lived with and saw every day.
I was ready fifteen minutes early and resisted the urge to pace the living room floor. Steele was still in his bedroom. He probably spent more time on his hair and clothes than I did. He was always so put together, clothes carefully pressed and not a hair out of place on his handsome head. I’d messed that hair up a few times, I thought with a wicked smirk.
I was grateful Ziggy and Cave weren’t here to witness my nervousness. I’d never live it down. I glanced at my phone gripped tightly in my hand. It was five forty-five on a Sunday night. Steele had a game last night, which they’d won. I saw bits and pieces of it while I was at work. He seemed to be playing with energy, as far as my novice eyes could tell.
We’d agreed on a relatively early dinner on Sunday night. Tomorrow, the team flew out on a week-long road trip. I wasn’t looking forward to him being gone an entire week, but the timing of a first date and his absence would give me time to see things more clearly.
When he asked me out—or Ziggy had asked me out on his behalf—I’d waited for him to deny he wanted a date. He hadn’t, and I, in turn, had said yes. Afterward, I’d half regretted my hasty decision, but there hadn’t been any way to back out. I’d tried to put him off until he returned from the road trip, but he refused to be denied. He steamrolled right past me and insisted we go out tonight.
I hadn’t been joking when I said I’d love a good meal out. I didn’t know when I’d last gone to a nice restaurant. I’d dressed in my best dress, a vividly colored tie-dyed piece that was flattering and flirty. I’d left my hair down but curled it slightly and put on a smattering of makeup. I’d grown out of slathering on a ton of makeup when I’d left my teen years behind.
I glanced up from my pacing and halted when I heard Steele’s footsteps down the hall. I turned to face him, and he stopped too. There we stood about fifteen feet from each other just staring. He was wearing one of his many designer suits that fit him perfectly in a gray that matched his eyes and a light blue dress shirt with no tie. The top two buttons were unbuttoned to reveal his strong neck. His short beard was neatly trimmed. His shoes were shined. Everything about him was as expected. I suddenly felt horribly out of place with a guy with the good looks of a male model. I was just me, and he was, well, he was a Greek god, an Adonis, a hottie with a great ass and thighs.
“You look…” He paused as if searching for the words, while I held my breath, fearing I might not measure up to his standards of dress. Until this very moment, I’d been proud of my individualist appearance.
“Do you want me to change?” I asked, feeling a little sick to my stomach. I shouldn’t have agreed to this date. We were incompatible out of the sack, and this wa
s a stupid idea on all counts.
“No. No. Definitely not,” he said adamantly. “I’ll be the envy of every guy in the restaurant.”
“You will?” I was incredulous. Mr. Nitpicky liked my funky style?
“Yes. You are stunning.”
Stunning? I’d never been called stunning before. Not that I recalled. Sassy. Sexy. Infuriating. Free spirit. Yeah, all that, but never stunning. I’d been running with the wrong crowd before, because I liked being called stunning.
“Well, thank you. May I say that you’re also stunning in a purely masculine way.”
“Thank you.” He grinned at me and branded a little piece of my soul with his name.
I beamed at him. I gave Herc a pat goodbye. Steele waited by the door for me. He held out my coat and helped me into it. Never in my life had a man helped me into my clothes, only out of them.
Steele’s manners were impeccable. As a woman who considered herself an equal of any man, I didn’t find his politeness demeaning to me as a woman. It was more like a luxury. I liked being pampered.
He took me to a steakhouse on Lake Union. I hoped they had something other than steaks, since I was a vegetarian, though I did eat fish and dairy.
The hostess handed us the menus, and I opened mine, perusing the menu and trying not to choke on the prices. Another first for me, I’d never eaten anywhere that had prices like this.
“I’ve been dying for a good steak, and this place has the best steaks in town.”
“The salads look good too.” I eyed one that had all sorts of fresh goodies in it.
“Oh, crap. I’m sorry.”
“For what?” I looked at him over the top of my menu.
“You don’t eat meat. I should’ve picked a different place.”
“I’m fine. Really. I don’t like to impose my beliefs on others.”
His brows shot upward, and the corner of his mouth twitched.
Icing Page 12
