This time, though, the talk would be harsh, and it wasn’t something she was looking forward to.
“How specific do you want me to be?”
“You don’t have to give me nasty details,” he said. “But I want to know what happened, and how it has affected you. Specifically the blindfold.”
They had the food spread on a blanket in between them. It had been late when they’d woken so they had lunch food: sandwiches and chips with some fruit. She took a sandwich and picked off a bite. Nash sat propped against the pillows. She sat at the end of the bed, a pillow cushioning her back against the wooden frame. Her ankle was still encased in the cuff and attached to the chain.
“When I first met Guest he was charming. He knew that I liked the rough stuff because I’ve never made a secret of it. His whippings were hard, but he never broke the skin, and it gave me what I wanted.”
She ate the pinch of bread, then took another one. “When he asked me to stay with him, he made it sound like things would be perfect. But once we’d left the resort he changed. He went from charming and dominant to mean and sadistic. When I complained, he told me I was the slave and had no rights, and I was to shut my mouth.
“Well, you know me. I told him he could shut his own mouth, that I’d never been treated as badly as he was treating me.” She swallowed hard. “That’s when he slapped me, and he held me down on the floor, his hands around my throat. He told me that if I left him, he’d hunt down Honor. If he couldn’t get me to obey, he’d get her to.”
Tears were falling now and she wiped them away. “I realized what a huge mess I was in, but I couldn’t let it spill over to Honor. I loved her too much for that. So I stayed and I tried to behave, although I smarted off quite a bit. When I did, he would punish me by blindfolding me and letting his friends take turns. They would whip me and fuck me. One of them had this…”
Heaven cleared her throat and shook her head. “Anyway, I don’t think there was that many of them, only three. I realized that not many people really liked Guest, not once they got to know him.”
She glanced at him from under lowered lashes. “Don’t worry; I’ve been tested for disease, twice.”
“I’m not worried, not about that.”
“When you put the blindfold on last night, I could hear Guest’s voice in my ear. I panicked. I’m so sorry I didn’t trust you.”
“Don’t blame yourself. I should have gotten more information from you before I played out a harsh scene with you.”
“Are you kidding? I loved the whipping.” She lowered her gaze and tightened her lips together.
“Really? I never would have guessed.” They both laughed, but they were nervous laughs, not the relaxed laughs they’d shared since she’d arrived.
“Are you sure you want me to stay? I would understand if you didn’t.”
“I’m very sure.”
“Thank you, Milord.” Her stomach grumbled, partly from hunger and partly from nerves. “So, we go back to writing and learning about me.”
“Wrong.” He lifted his brows. “You’re not going to hide up here by yourself anymore. During the day I want you to write, yes, about your feelings about what happened. But it’s for your eyes only, not for mine or anyone else’s. I’m going to work a lot of the night, and then at nine, you’re going downstairs.”
“In other words, you’re not going to baby me.”
“That’s right. You sat in Chama for months, and then I brought you here and you did it for a few more days. That was wrong of me. Now it’s time to push you back into the world of the living.”
“Are you putting me to work?”
“In ways you never imagined. And you’re going to love it.”
* * *
Now that I know no one but me will see this, it’s much easier to write. Sir Nash told me the best thing I could do for myself was talk about my feelings. Right now I am a mess, wanting what Nash has to offer on the physical side, yet so frightened on the mental side that I totally lost it and acted like an idiot.
He’s not angry with me, and I’m not sure why. If I were he, would I be angry? Yes. He tells me I’ve given him a huge gift by trusting him when we went by the cabanas. Then, I dump that trust on the ground, behaving like a frightened child, screaming my safe word as if I were facing the devil himself.
Milord Nash wants me to write down my feelings, so that’s exactly what I’ll do. How do I feel about last night? Like an idiot. And I am angry with myself. Angry that I let bad memories distort, and possibly have a ruinous effect, on something that could turn out to the best thing that’s happened to me since Shawn.
Shawn, my Shawn, how I miss you. It was you, you remember, who told me not to be ashamed of what I liked. I would think of you when Guest touched me, did you know that? It helped me get through it, and I love you for it.
But I suppose talking about you isn’t exactly what Milord Nash had in mind. He wants feelings about what happened last night, and about the reason for them. Guest. When I talked myself out of prosecuting him, I really thought I could forget it. But how can someone forget a vile man who doesn’t deserve to walk the face of the earth? Karma will catch up to him, sooner or later.
And last night, the pain of it rocked inside me. I loved every touch Milord Nash gave me, and yet when the blindfold came out, the fear of the unknown took over. Once my eyes were covered, all I could see was Guest, telling me all the ways I would serve him as his whore. Funny, if Milord Nash were to say it to me, I would love it.
I have to ask myself what the difference is. Trust? Respect? Communication? I’m not sure which, but when he held me as I cried, I thought I had lost him. I thought he only felt sorry for me, sorry that he’d brought me here, and holding me was just a way to get me to stop crying. After all, who wants a submissive that falls apart?
Apparently, though, I underestimated him. I didn’t give him enough credit for being the man that he is. To repay him, I need to push aside the man who tried—that’s right, just tried—to take hold of me. As of this moment, he has no hold on me. I am stronger than that. If bad memories rear their head again, I will think of last night, of the way Milord Nash held me, and told me things would be fine. Those are the memories I need to focus on now.
Chapter 10
“I was always told I was too short to be a model, Sir Ulrich.” Heaven glanced at Nash, who stood in the doorway of the bondage room, his arms crossed over his chest and a huge smile on his face. When he’d said he was putting her to work he wasn’t kidding. Of course this was for the best, she knew. To get her in front of people, to stop her from hiding.
“Nonsense,” Ulrich said. “You’ll be perfect. I’m demonstrating two different types of bondage tonight. Decorative, and useful. We’ll do the decorative first, so that you can wear my creations for the useful demonstration.”
“What are you going to make, in the way of rope clothing?”
“You’ll be as surprised as those who show up for the class.” She noticed that his eyes were a sea green. “Don’t worry. I know you’re Nash’s woman, so I’m not going to play with you, unless he gives me permission.”
She was going to respond, but people started to show up. He went to greet them, talking with a Dom and two subs, and then a Mistress and her sub. His words echoed in her ears as he worked the room, his charm evident. Nash’s woman. He thought there was more between the two of them than there really was. She didn’t want to tell him differently, but sooner or later the staff would figure out that she wasn’t his.
The room was pretty much full when Sir Ulrich called the class to order. “Tonight, I’ll show you how to make rope clothing for your female subs, or for your male ones if you so desire.”
A tittering of laughter greeted his words. “After that, I’ll demonstrate how best to tie a sub for maximum pleasure, for whatever you have in mind.” The laughter increased, and Sir Ulrich turned to her.
“My new assistant, sub Heaven, will serve as my model tonight.” Her hands s
hook just a little as she walked over to Sir Ulrich, who motioned her to his side. “Now, the first item I’ll demonstrate is something I’ve combined from two different techniques. I’ll make a pair of rope panties hooked to a rope corset.”
“Sub Heaven, if you will, stand in the center of the room and take your robe off for us.”
Heaven knew this was what Nash wanted, for her to feel safe and do the things that would help her build up her confidence again, help her push away bad memories. Being naked in a room full of people wouldn’t bother her. And it would help her build trust.
She stepped to the center and dropped her robe. Sir Ulrich looked her over. “Humph. I think we need something for her to stand on so I don’t have to sit.”
The laughter took over as he motioned to a man at the door. Soon, two male subs came in carrying a three-step platform. Sir Ulrich helped Heaven into the center and then started to work. He held up the soft rope to demonstrate different knots, then began to weave them together, talking the whole time. Heaven was amazed as she watched him. His large hands moved swiftly over the rope, and after about ten minutes he asked her to step into her new panties.
They featured two strings on the side, a small decorative patch in the front, and nothing but a single string in the back.
“Practical and decorative,” Sir Ulrich said. “You can have your sub wear these for all your fun plans.”
It took him little time to wrap her in a corset, keeping it low on her waist. He tugged and pulled gently on ropes as he reinforced to his crowd that they needed to make sure ropes were tight, but not too tight.
“You also want to make sure you keep the ropes a uniform space apart, so that it looks nice, and is comfortable.”
He adjusted ropes as he talked, and Heaven looked over the crowd. She saw Nash standing at the back, watching intently. He nodded in appreciation and she felt warmth spread across her chest and neck, creeping up to her face.
“Are those nipples hard for me, or for the big guy?” Sir Ulrich had his back to the crowd, and there was a huge smile on his face. He was attaching the corset to the panties. “Wait, don’t answer that, it’ll hurt my ego.”
Heaven laughed, then held out her arms so the crowd could come and examine Sir Ulrich’s handiwork. He answered questions while Heaven locked gazes with Nash, who still stood in the doorway, leaning against the jamb. When he ran his hand over his crotch, she felt wetness form in her pussy. If she wasn’t careful, this could be a little embarrassing.
When Sir Ulrich stepped up to continue his demonstration, he gave her another one of his devilish smiles. “Don’t get your wetness on my panties.”
“Aren’t they mine now, Sir Ulrich?”
“Don’t get cheeky with me, sub Heaven. I might have to ask your Master about a public punishment.”
“And he just might give one, Sir Ulrich.”
He chuckled, then turned back to the crowd, his gaze focusing on Nash. She watched them nod at each other. “I’m going to bind sub Heaven’s arms behind her back, at the request of her Master, our illustrious host, Sir Nash.”
What? Heaven glanced at Nash. He’d asked Sir Ulrich to bind her arms behind her back?
“I’m going to wrap her arms in sleeves, then tie them together. It’s a practical bondage technique that will keep your submissive bound for both of your pleasure and doesn’t cost a fortune.”
He wrapped and talked as Heaven stood, her arms stretched behind her back. She wasn’t hearing much of what he was saying, though. All she kept thinking about was her Master, and how quickly this would be over so she could go to him.
Before long her arms were bound in place, and the crowd examined her, asking Sir Ulrich questions as she patiently waited. Well, maybe not so patiently. Her body was on fire for Nash, wanting him more than she’d wanted him this morning when he’d been so wonderful to her after her breakdown.
Nash watched her until Sir Ulrich demonstrated how easy it was to release a sub from the arm cage. Then, he nodded and left the room. She served as a model for another session, her mind wandering to where Nash was, and what he was doing.
She didn’t see him until around two that morning. Sir Ulrich had just finished binding her arms in the cage behind her back when Nash appeared. He helped her down to her knees, where she kissed his cock in greeting. Then he’d helped her to stand. He’d attached a leash to her collar and led her back upstairs. Things were still in full play downstairs and she wondered what he had planned for them.
“Did you like playing with the ropes?”
“Yes, Milord.”
“You look delicious, all wrapped up like that.” They were standing in the living room. Her shoulders were a little uncomfortable from being pulled back much of the evening, but she stood still as Nash circled her.
“I want to fuck you while you’re all tied up, and since we have a no penetration rule in the main part of the house, I couldn’t do that there.” He stepped in front of her and tugged gently on her leash, lifting her gaze to his own. “Do you want me to fuck you, Heaven?”
“Yes, Milord.”
“Good. Now, be the Heaven I’ve heard so much about. Beg me.”
Heaven’s nerves tingled as he stared at her, taking a step closer until their bodies were almost touching. “I’ve heard so much about Heaven, the wild woman. I’ve seen bits and pieces of her. I want to see the rest tonight. Beg me.”
“I want you inside me, Milord. Please take me.”
“Beg me.”
“Please, I want you hard and hot in me. Make me your willing slave.”
She heard the drop of the chain from the ceiling. When he attached it to the ropes around her arms, she closed her eyes, half in fear and half in pleasure. She wasn’t afraid of what he would do, she was afraid she would freak out halfway through the scene. She had to control her emotions, her fears. That meant concentrating only on Nash.
“Now, let’s hear it again.” He stripped and sat down on the couch, stretching his legs out in front of him and throwing his arms out. His hard cock jutted out from between his legs, and she licked her lips at the sight of him. “Because I’m not convinced you want me.”
“Fuck me, Milord.”
“What?”
“Fuck me, take me hard, Milord.”
“Pitiful. Be nasty for me.”
“I want your cock, hot in my pussy, hard in my ass, pumping my mouth. I want you everywhere, Milord.”
Nash sniffed like he was bored. “Perhaps I should go find a sub downstairs, let her suck me while you watch. You sound like you’re ordering pizza, not a good fucking from the man who owns you.”
“I’m so wet for you, I’m dripping, Milord. All night long while Sir Ulrich bound me all I could think of was you, wanting you, needing you.”
“Go on.”
“Fuck me. Stick your dick in me, hard, pound me, Milord.” Her voice grew stronger with each word, and for a second she thought she saw approval flash on his face.
“Where?”
“Everywhere, Milord. Stick your cock in my pussy, your dick in my ass. Shove it down my throat.”
He was beside her in seconds, running his hands down her bound arms. “What part of you aches to swallow my dick the most?”
“My ass.” The words tumbled out quickly. When he didn’t answer she stirred, kept in place by the chain. “Please fuck my ass, please.”
More silence.
“Milord, claim me, fuck my asshole, make it yours, make me yours.” Each word was like gasoline on a fire. She wiggled to try to entice him as she groaned out.
“Fuck me, please!”
“Who are you?” His voice was right next to her ear.
“I’m your willing submissive, Milord.” The words made her tingle. “Please take me for your pleasure.”
When he left the room she tried not to panic. He was back minutes later, his hands on her bare ass, moving aside the rope that rested between her cheeks. He parted her orbs and lightly touched her anus. The cool crea
m made her shiver.
“Is this what you want me to take?”
“Yes, Milord.” She pushed back into his finger.
“I want you to make noise the whole time: moans, groans, words. I don’t care what it is as long as you’re making noise. I don’t want you to stop until I’m done fucking this sweet asshole.”
“As you command, Milord.”
“That’s right, shorty.” She shivered. It was the first time he’d called her that all day, and somehow it reinforced the fact that she belonged to him. It was his name for her, and only his. His finger pushed inside her and she groaned.
“Louder.”
“Milord, take me, make me yours.” He inserted another finger and she started to moan loudly, doing her best impression of a porn star. The fullness was fantastic, the feeling made more intense by her bonds.
He made her wait so long that Heaven thought she would go crazy. When he finally placed the tip of his cock at her anus she whimpered. “Please, fuck me, Milord. Take me.”
The first push was gentle, just parting her enough to swallow the head of his cock. She jiggled her legs and tried to press back, but he kept his hands on her hips, holding her still.
After a few moments she let out a cry of distress. “Fuck me! Damn it, Milord, take me!”
“Louder!” He pressed inside, his cock widening her tight entrance, the burn seeping into her core.
“Fuck my ass, do it, fuck it!”
“That’s it, tell me how you want it.”
“Hard and deep, long and full, fuck it hard, Milord.” He was all the way in now, his pelvis resting on her buttocks. Her anus burned with the intrusion, and she loved every minute of it.
She whimpered and mewled, begging him to fuck her hard. He drove into her with a force that lifted her onto her toes. Her arms ached from their position, and her body hummed for him.
She begged and cried for more as he fucked her, telling him she’d never had such a magnificent dick up her ass, that she would crave him for the rest of her life. She wanted to feel his cum buried deep inside her, hot and wet.
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