“I’m sorry I suggested helping you. I guess I shouldn’t do that in the future.” Why was she being so defensive? I was only offering to help.
“It would be fine if you were doing it for the right reasons.” She shifted further away from me.
I needed to do something. I refused to let us get in a fight over something as stupid as me walking her to a job interview. I stood up and held out my hand in invitation. “You’ve never actually seen my room.”
“You’re right. I haven’t.” She hesitated for a moment before accepting my outstretched hand. “See you guys later.”
I led her toward my room before she could change her mind and leave. I’d find a way to get us over this initial transition period. I needed to bide my time, and everything else would work out.
Jade
The first day back at the station was the strangest. We weren’t doing our regular shows during the summer, so instead of interviewing bands I was introducing listeners to new music. I tended to always go for the indie and underground groups, and Kyle never seemed to have a problem with it. He was good at his job. He made sure things ran smoothly, but otherwise he let the hosts exercise their creativity.
I took my time getting in for my first hour on Monday morning. I usually showed up early as an excuse to see Kyle, but I didn’t need to make excuses to see him anymore. I smiled as I thought about how cute he’d looked when I left his bed that morning. We’d gotten spoiled with a king sized bed at the hotel, and his double was taking some time to get used to. I didn’t mind. I liked being close.
I heard Kyle talking as soon as I pushed open the door to the station. I hesitated in the doorway. He was talking to Sean, another host. I tentatively walked further inside.
Sean winked as soon as he saw me. “Hey, Jade. Next time try not to take your time off at the same time as Kyle. You left me hanging.”
“Oh yeah, sure.” Did the wink mean he knew? I was too tired to read into it. The one downside to staying at Kyle’s was that I didn’t get as much sleep.
“Sorry, she can’t agree to that.” Kyle walked over and put an arm around me.
“Wait. Are you guys…?” Sean looked between us as a slow smile spread across his face.
“Yes,” Kyle said at the exact same time I said, “Kind of.”
Sean laughed. “So which is it?”
“We’re letting things happen naturally.” Kyle ran his hand up and down my back. I wondered if that was his way of making sure I didn’t argue.
Sean’s brow wrinkled. “And that means?”
“It means I’m sleeping with him.” I stepped away from Kyle’s embrace and walked back to my desk in the inner office. Maybe I was a little bit blunt, but I wasn’t going to beat around the bush and start any false rumors. Right now Kyle was entertained by me. He’d get bored by the time the rest of the student body returned.
I heard the door close behind me.
“You’re sleeping with me?” Kyle said to my back. I wasn’t turning around.
“I am.”
“I think my ‘we’re letting it happen naturally’ explanation fits better.”
“Tomato, tomato.”
“Jade.” His voice came from right behind me. I fought the urge to turn around. “Look at me.”
“Why?”
“Come on.” He gave a heavy sigh.
I finally turned around. I needed to get ready for my show so I’d have to turn around eventually. “Yes?”
“You don’t need to be so self-deprecating. I like you. You like me. If you want me to start calling you my girlfriend I’m fine with that.”
“I never asked you to do that.” I tried to ignore the tightness in my chest at the mention of the word girlfriend.
“Ok, then how about this? I’m asking you to let me call you it.” His eyes bore into mine.
“Why?”
“Isn’t that obvious?” He rubbed the back of his neck.
“No.” I crossed my arms.
“I like you a lot. We work. Why not just make this more official?”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.” I wasn’t ready to take that risk yet unless I knew he really wanted it.
“Why not?” His body stiffened.
“I have to get ready.” I hurried toward the booth.
“We’re not done with this conversation.”
“We are for now.” I closed the door to the booth and got ready. I had no idea what to say to Kyle. I refused to let him call me his girlfriend out of some sense of obligation or guilt. He didn’t need to. It was easier to call it what it was.
“I’m going to join you.” Kyle sat down next to me and put on a set of headphones.
“I can do it myself.” I paid way more attention than necessary to checking over the set list.
“I know that, but I’m joining you anyway.”
“Fine, if you want to waste your time.” I rolled my eyes. Why was he being like this? The whole point of avoiding a relationship was avoiding the drama. Well, and avoiding the pain.
I waited until exactly ten before putting us on air. “Good morning, Charleston. I hope everyone is doing well on this beautiful Monday morning. The only thing that could make this gorgeous day any better is some new music. So how about it? Let’s start with some new Pearberry that just dropped last week.” I switched on the new single from a local band I’d grown to love.
As soon as I turned off my mic Kyle touched my hand. “About me calling you my girlfriend?”
“I only want you to do it if you’re doing it for the right reasons.”
“The right reasons being?” He narrowed his eyes.
“You know.”
“I think I do, except I’m struggling to come up with any wrong reasons.”
“You’re only doing it because you think you have to.” I checked the time on the track. “You don’t.” The Chance of a Lifetime tune Sex on the Beach was up next.
“I’m doing it because I want to… does that clear things up?”
“What about letting things happen naturally?” I didn’t look at him. I couldn’t.
“This is letting them happen naturally… and I’m not okay with people thinking I’m using you for sex or something.”
“So now the truth comes out. You’re only saying this because of Sean. You’re worried he’s going to think less of you.”
“No. You know what? You want to wait longer before attaching a relationship label? Fine.” He tossed his headphones aside and stormed out of the booth.
I tried not to let it bother me, but it did. I wished I could see into his mind. What did he actually want? What did I want? I was crazy about Kyle, I loved the way he made me feel, but I wasn’t sure if that was enough.
Kyle
Jade was the single most infuriating, yet addicting, person I’d ever met. For the life of me I couldn’t read her. I couldn’t understand what she wanted or needed from me. If I thought she only wanted hook ups I’d have left it alone, but I knew she wanted more. I could see it in her eyes, and the way she stayed up to talk to me all night. I’d brought up the girlfriend thing because it made sense. Between Ray at the gym and her describing what we were doing as ‘just sleeping together’ something had to give. If we were agreeing to exclusive, why not use the label?
I tried to step back, give her the space she wanted, but I wasn’t giving up. I’d never felt so connected to a girl before, and it didn’t help that my family called me constantly asking how she was. I wasn’t surprised she’d made such a good impression, but now I had no clue what to do. I definitely wasn’t telling them we’d broken up. If things went my way she’d officially be with me soon enough.
I couldn’t sit around my apartment a second more. I knocked on Glen’s door, hoping I wasn’t interrupting something with him and Savy.
“Come in,” he called through the door.
“Hey guys, do you feel like heading down to the Music Attic with me?”
“I wonder why you’d want to go there?” Sav
y sat cross-legged on Glen’s bed. He was seated at his desk typing.
“Yeah, well. I’m not going to pretend otherwise.”
“I’m sure she’ll enjoy the surprise visit.” Savy grinned.
“Can you give me twenty minutes? I need to finish this paper.” Glen looked away from the computer. He was taking a busy load of summer classes to make up for some time he’d taken off.
“Sure. I’ll wait for you guys out here.” I headed out of Glen’s room, closing the door behind me.
I hoped Savy was right, and Jade did enjoy the surprise.
Forty minutes later we finally reached the door of the music venue where Jade worked. A local band was playing, and they’d drawn in a big crowd.
“Hey!” Jade beamed when she saw us. “I didn’t know you guys were coming out tonight.”
“Kyle decided to surprise you.” Savy patted my arm.
“It’s a great surprise.” Her eyes sparkled. She was excited to see me, and that made the trip down to see her completely worth it.
I handed over my credit card to cover the three tickets.
Jade took it, scanned it, and handed me the card and a receipt back. “I’ll come find you guys when the line stops.”
“All right. Text me if you can’t find us.” I leaned over the counter and kissed her lightly on the lips.
She smiled. “All right. I will.”
I reluctantly walked inside. I couldn’t hold up the line any longer.
“Did you see the way she looked at you?” Savy ran a hand through her long blond hair.
“Was it different than she normally does?”
“No. It was the same. That’s the point. The girl’s clearly crazy about you.”
“The feeling’s mutual.” I wondered where Savy was going with the conversation.
“Have you broached the relationship status thing again?”
Glen led the way through the crowd. “Savy, don’t get into the middle of this. It’s none of our business.”
“It is my business. Jade is my friend. I want her happy.”
“Don’t we all?” I wanted her happy more than anyone. I hoped that her being happy meant being with me.
“I wish I knew how to convince her to stop holding back.” Savy got in line for the bar.
“Trust me. I do too.”
“Have you talked to her about it in a while?” She dug out her wallet from her purse.
“No. I’m afraid it will push her away.”
“Yeah, but if you do nothing you’re the one who’s going to be pushed away.” She tilted her head back.
“I’m not going anywhere.”
“That’s the funny thing.” Savy ordered a couple bottles of water and handed me one. “Thanks for getting the tickets.”
“You’re welcome.” I twisted open the top of my water. “But what’s funny?”
“She’s afraid of getting into a relationship with you because she thinks you’re going to get bored and leave her. What she doesn’t get is she’s going to make you leave if she keeps playing these games.”
I stared at her. Was that really it? Jade thought I was going to get bored with her? Maybe I’d been approaching the situation all wrong.
Savy put a hand over her mouth. “Oh my gosh. I wasn’t supposed to say that. She’s going to kill me. I just want her happy. I want that so bad.”
“Don’t worry, I won’t tell her you did. It’s good information to have though.”
“You think you can convince her she’s wrong?” Savy asked hopefully.
“I’m going to try.” I didn’t have another choice. I wasn’t giving up.
I spent most of the show glancing over my shoulder, looking for Jade, but by the end of the first set I still hadn’t seen any sign of her. I excused myself from Savy and Glen and went back to the ticket counter. I found her talking to another guy who worked there. Bryan.
When Jade saw me she ran into my arms. I hugged her back while noting Bryan’s dirty look. Didn’t she realize her co-worker was into her?
She kissed me on the cheek. “Sorry. The crowd’s been crazy tonight.”
“Bryan, do you have it now?” I met his eyes.
He glanced at the empty entrance. “Sure. Have fun.”
Jade waved. “Thanks.”
I laced my fingers with hers and led her over to where I’d left Savy and Glen.
She stayed glued to my side as the band moved into their second set. She jumped around and sang along, reminding me of our hike. Live music had the same effect on Jade that the outdoors did, it let her true colors show. I put my arms around her waist, enjoying the way her body bumped into mine. I liked the music, but I liked the company so much more.
* * *
“Thanks for the surprise visit tonight.” Jade curled up beside me in bed.
“Of course. I missed you.”
“I missed you too.” She ran her hand down my chest.
I closed my eyes, concentrating on her gentle touch. “My mom asked about you again tonight.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yup. She wanted to make sure you were getting enough sleep with all the hours you’re working.”
Jade laughed that light laugh of hers. “The lack of sleep isn’t from the job.”
I opened my eyes. “I wasn’t going to tell her that.”
“I appreciate that. Obviously she knows we’re sleeping together, but she doesn’t need to know exactly how much.”
“She’s already asking about the holidays and Thanksgiving.” I tried to make it sound nonchalant.
“Oh no.” She leaned up on one elbow. “Tell her I need to spend them with my parents…although you do know you’re going to have to make a break-up eventually.”
“Do I?” I ran my hand through her hair. “I mean we are together a lot now.”
“But we’re not together in the way they think.”
“All they know is we’re dating and we met at the station. That’s still true. The only difference is we haven’t been sleeping together as long as they think.”
“But sleeping together is different than dating.”
“Then let’s try dating.”
“Meaning?”
“Let me take you out.”
“Out where?” She sat up, letting the sheet fall down. I forced my eyes to move back to her face instead of focusing on her exposed breasts. Ogling her chest wasn’t going to help me convince her that my feelings for her were serious.
I thought about it. “To dinner. Maybe a movie.”
“You want to do dinner and a movie?” She looked at me like I was crazy. “Aren’t we doing things a little bit backwards?”
“I do have another idea.”
“Oh?”
“Come away with me this weekend.”
“That again? Are you serious?” She pursed her lips.
“I did promise my mom I’d take you out to the beach house.” The thought of Jade at the beach with me made my body warm. The fact that she was already naked next to me didn’t help.
“When?”
“Do you have to work tomorrow night?” I asked hopefully.
“Nope. I have the night off.”
“We’ll go tomorrow morning. It can be a beach date.”
“That’s still backwards. You’re taking me on a vacation again.”
“No, it’s more of a short getaway.” I realized something as she sat there chatting with me. She was revealing her body to me without seeming embarrassed or nervous. Usually the only time she let me see her was when we were actively getting ready to have sex.
“I wouldn’t mind some time at the beach.”
“Great.” I pulled her down on top of me. “It’s a date.”
“That still doesn’t change anything.”
“Yes it does.” I kissed her nose.
“Nope. We’re still just sleeping together.”
“And going on dates.”
“Fine. We’re dating. That doesn’t mean I’m your girlfriend.” She rested he
r head on my chest.
“One step at a time.” I kissed her shoulder.
“One step at a time.” She repeated my words before her hand slipped down underneath the sheet.
Jade
I should have said no to the beach trip. I should have stepped back before it became even harder to stay away, but I couldn’t. I wanted to go, and without thinking things through, I agreed. Every time I told myself I needed to stay away—to stop myself, I couldn’t. It was like I was addicted. It’s not like he ever treated me badly. He was the opposite, but the harder I tried to stop myself from falling for him, the worse I made it. Dylan’s words constantly echoed in my head, and memories of the last time I gave someone my heart crushed me like a ton of bricks until I couldn’t breathe. It was so much easier to focus on the sex. I wanted to be brave and take a chance on Kyle, but I was terrified.
I shrugged off my doubts as I packed for the night away. No matter what happened, a day at the beach sounded great. Besides, we couldn’t keep things the way they were forever. Before we knew it the new semester would be starting, and I needed to know where we were at before that happened.
Kyle picked me up much the same way he did before we left for Lake George, but this time things were completely different. He kissed me on the lips as soon as I walked out on the front porch. “Ready for some fun in the sun?”
“Fun in the sun? Sometimes you’re a walking advertisement.”
“Should I be emphasizing another part of this trip? How about for some fun in the sheets?”
I let him take my bag. “Stick with the fun in the sun.”
“Good. I’m excited to see what bikini you packed.” He put my small bag in the back of the car.
“How do you know I packed a bikini?” It wouldn’t be the first time he’d seen me in one, it’s what I wore at the lake, but it was still fun to tease him. That was one thing that hadn’t changed.
“Because I’ve never seen you in a one piece.”
“I packed a few options.”
“Options are always good.” He held open the passenger door.
I slipped in and buckled while I waited for him to go around.
Forever Love: A Friends to Lovers Collections Page 31
