by Anna Kashina
She sighed. However much these thoughts bothered her, this wasn’t something they would be able to solve in a short conversation.
“Thank you, Aghat Raishan,” she said. “I know this kind of talk goes beyond your duty of guarding me, but you did make me feel a whole lot better just now.”
Raishan grinned. “Guarding you has many sides to it, Aghat. We both know Aghat Mai’s choice to charge me with this task wasn’t incidental. And… I’m glad I helped.”
Warmth filled her as she kept his gaze. She was surprised to realize how much Raishan’s approval, everything he said to her just now, meant to her. She felt stronger from this short conversation, ready to do her best to put the whole situation behind her.
“I expect the King’s council will probably last for a while,” she said. “How about passing the time on the training grounds until they’re done?”
Raishan nodded. “Sounds like a good idea.”
They turned and resumed their walk along the corridor side by side, the clanking of Emeralds’ feet echoing behind them.
The large courtyard at the back of the palace, normally dedicated entirely to the training of the King’s five Gem-ranked Majat bodyguards, was packed. Mai’s attack force flooded it from wall to wall, the activity resembling the lower market plaza on a busy day.
Men paused in their tasks and stepped aside, letting her and Raishan through to the elevated training platform at the far end. Kara strode up to the weapons stand beside it and chose a long staff from the back row – too heavy for her build, but appropriate for an intense workout she had in mind.
“Will you practice with me, Aghat Raishan?” she asked.
Raishan grinned. “If you’re certain that’s what you want.” He picked the staff nearest to him, weighting it in his hands. Bigger and heavier than Kara, he could use any of them for an effective practice. Standing up to him with the heavy staff she chose would be an extra challenge – exactly what she needed just now.
She stepped onto the floor, half aware of the men pausing in their tasks to watch. Diamonds rarely had the opportunity to face each other. Seeing her and Raishan spar with heavy staffs was bound to be a sight not to be forgotten in a hurry.
The staff was heavy, but well balanced. She enjoyed the strain in her muscle as she parried Raishan’s blows, the polished wood singing in her hands. His head-on attack was forceful and she enjoyed it too as she twisted out of his locks, spinning around, aiming for the peripheral spots. A quick smile slid over Raishan’s face as he changed his tactics to match.
She waited until he was committed to the new attack and unexpectedly dropped to a crouch, sweeping low. His eyes widened as he jumped over her staff, his shape becoming a blur as he picked up speed. She kept ahead of him, aware of the silence around them, the crowd of top ranked warriors watching in awe as she and Raishan circled around the small practice space. She was now fighting at her full power and she could tell he was too. She stilled her mind, focusing on his moves, anticipating…
The pulling sensation wafted over her skin like a cold draft. She wavered as she parried Raishan’s attack and clenched her teeth, recomposing. Her muscles were beginning to feel sore. Staffs were not choice weapons for both of them, and the need to wield a heavier one than she normally would pick was beginning to take its toll.
She could tell Raishan was tiring too, but the knowledge didn’t help much. He was going to keep it up until she stopped, and, despite the sweat breaking on her forehead, she was not ready to do so just yet.
A sting at the back of her head made her stumble. For a moment, the boards under her feet felt uneven, like quicksand. Images of being nearly pulled into the Kaddim’s vortex floated up into her head. The cobbles of the pavement, bucking. The ground caving in, pulling her down. The Kaddim Brother nearest to her brushing his hand over her skin. This time she felt the invasion all the way in, the touch like a needle piercing her skin. The mark. A piece of their magic, inside me. A bridge to their minds…
Dear Shal Addim, that’s how it works.
She felt like she did back then, a force sweeping her, trying to pull her away. Her feet were still here, grasping the firmness of the training floor, but her balance shifted, as if she wasn’t fully present on solid ground. Her hand wavered. The tip of her staff, raised for the block, dipped downward. She could see the horror in Raishan’s eyes as his weapon came through, hitting her on the head.
Her vision darkened as she dropped her staff and sank to the floor, half-aware of Raishan rushing to her side. He caught her as she fell, and she saw his pale face very close.
“Damn it,” he snapped. “Jahib Lenart, get Aghat Mai, quick!”
The pulling became stronger, drawing her into a void as she passed out in Raishan’s arms.
Gradually, she started hearing sounds again, aware of the conversation going on beside her.
“I’m not sure what happened, Aghat Mai. She blocked me, and then, at the very last moment, she just tilted her staff away.”
Her eyelids fluttered open. The midday sun hit her eyes with brightness that made her wince. Damn it, did I just let Raishan knock me out in a practice fight? Her eyes slowly focused on Mai’s face leaning over her. She saw his shoulders relax as he met her gaze.
“Are you all right?”
She could hear the relief in his voice. Damn it, how long was I out?
“Sorry,” she said. “It was entirely my fault.”
“I’d say so. What were you thinking, picking a staff of this weight against an opponent of his skill?”
She shook her head, ignoring the throbbing in her head that felt worse from the movement. “No, not that. I wanted a good workout. It’s…” She paused. It’s the Kaddim. They can disable me in a fight. There was no way in hell she was going to say this out loud. If she did, it would make it all true. Worse, the feeling of relief she felt at the fact that she hadn’t actually been pulled anywhere as it initially seemed, made it all even more unsettling.
Could the mark she carried enable the Kaddim to whisk her away through their time vortex? She shivered, clenching Mai’s arm, his muscle reassuringly hard under the silky sleeve of his shirt.
Mai’s gaze darkened. She knew he understood her without words. Seeing his expression, a mix of anger and concern, made her want to cry. Did she have to give up everything, including her fighting skill, because of the damned link?
“Are you feeling better?” Mai asked.
She nodded, using his hand for support to sit up. Her head ached. She winced as she felt around her temple. Damn it, I must have a huge bruise.
Raishan knelt in front of her, frowning with concern. “I’m so sorry. I should have done better. It was just so… unexpected.”
She smiled. “It’s all right, Aghat Raishan. No harm done.”
His eyes hovered on the side of her head, suggesting otherwise. She took a breath as she rose to her feet, steadying herself against Mai’s arm.
“Let’s go inside,” Mai said. “You need to have this bruise seen to.”
She lowered her eyes as she followed him, sensing the unspoken words behind his brisk tone. He wanted to know how the hell it was possible for someone of her skill to get knocked out in a practice fight, even if she had been fighting a Diamond with a very heavy staff. She wanted to know that too, even if she probably wasn’t going to like the answer. Worse, she couldn’t escape a feeling there was something else he wasn’t telling her, something they must have discussed in the council chamber after she left. Were things even more complicated than she already thought?
6
Control
The Keepers’ quarters consisted of a long suite of rooms, opening into a large but cozy sitting area with tall armchairs arranged around the massive fireplace. Mai settled into one of these chairs, instantly receding into the background. His stillness made him appear nearly inanimate, but his alert eyes followed Kara’s every move.
She winced as Magister Egey Bashi ran his fingers over her temple.
The Keeper exchanged a look with Mai.
“The bone is intact,” he said. “It’s the concussion I am more worried about.”
“I have no concussion, Magister. I would have noticed, wouldn’t I?”
Another glance passed between the two men.
“How long were you out, Aghat Kara?” the Keeper asked.
She shrugged. “Fifteen minutes, at most. Right?” She looked at Mai, who nodded. “Really, don’t you think you are overreacting?”
“You were knocked out in a practice fight,” Mai said. “I know Raishan did everything humanly possible to stop his hand. This makes the whole incident bloody disturbing, don’t you think?”
She held his gaze. He was afraid, she realized. Perhaps he had reasons to be. If this happened in a real fight, against an enemy motivated to kill her rather than stay his hand to prevent injury, she would be dead. On the other hand, she would hardly expect to face anyone of Raishan’s skill in a real battle, would she?
Egey Bashi let out a sigh. “Here, Aghat Kara, let me give you something to ease the swelling.” He fumbled in his medicine pack.
Kara winced as his calloused fingers massaged the ointment into her skin. It stung, a coolness spreading over the affected area as the cure worked its course. She glanced into her reflection in the window pane. Her dark skin made the bruise nearly unnoticeable anyway. After the cure, she was certain no one could even tell she had been hit.
“You said you felt a pulling sensation as you were fighting?” Egey Bashi asked.
“Yes.” Kara wondered at his frown, etched so deeply that it threatened to become permanent. “Why?”
Again, the two men exchanged a glance.
She sighed. “Can the two of you stop acting as if I’m not here?”
“Have you found anything else about the link, Magister?” Mai asked.
The Keeper gave him a dark look. “Nothing good, I’m afraid.”
“Let’s hear the bad, then.”
“The fact that the sensation became obvious during a fight confirms what I said earlier. They are trying to use this link to pull away her gift. When she’s using it, she becomes far more vulnerable.”
Kara’s eyes widened. “What?”
“Your fighting ability. They are trying to steal it and confer it to their warriors.”
Kara felt the blood instantly drain out of her face. The throbbing in her temple eased. She felt cold, as if dropped into a pond of water. “Can they?”
“Yes.”
“But…” She turned to Mai, vaguely aware of how desperate she must look.
He sprang out of the chair and stepped up to her side. His closeness felt reassuring, in sharp contrast with the frown that wouldn’t leave his face.
“It will be all right,” Mai said.
“How?”
“The Magister promised to come up with ways to neutralize this link.”
The Keeper frowned. “Apart from sedating her, you mean?”
“Yes, apart from that.”
“Sedating me?”
Mai shot her a quick glance. “That was one of the Magister’s suggestions, before I told him what I think about that. I’m surprised it even came up this time.”
She bit back a lump rising in her throat. She didn’t want to be sedated. But if there was even a slightest chance that, because of her, their enemies might learn to fight like a Diamond Majat…
“I will consider it,” she said
“I bloody hope not,” Mai said. “You are instrumental to our plans. However, before we can even discuss them, we must be sure you are in full control of your own mind.”
She stiffened as she noticed Mai’s tightening jaw, the way his eyes darted to the Keeper again. She understood these looks, and her options, all too well. If stealing her gift was even a possibility, the only reasonable course of action would be to kill her. From the look in Mai’s eyes she was certain the possibility had been discussed at the King’s council after she left, even though she knew Mai would never entertain the thought. She wouldn’t either, if their roles were reversed. She didn’t want to die. But, given the alternatives, if sedation could help, it was definitely an option. If things remained as they were, she must at least bear this in mind. She forced a smile, aware of how both men were watching her now, as if evaluating her.
“What does it feel like when they use the link?” Egey Bashi asked.
She thought about it. “Like someone’s touching me. Lightly, at first, but then it begins to feel as if I am being pulled. The reason I wavered when I fought Raishan was because it seemed as if the floor was disappearing from under my feet. And then… I… I realized exactly how they placed their link. When one of them touched me during the fight, it felt like a needle going in. Not painful at all. Just… cold.” She paused, trying to control her trembling lips. She remembered what Egey Bashi had said in the council chamber about emotional attachment. The touch she remembered, the caress. Why couldn’t she stop thinking about it?
“Where did they touch you?” Egey Bashi asked.
“On my arm. Here.”
He reached forward and pulled up her sleeve. She kept still as both men examined the spot.
“I see nothing,” Mai said at length.
Egey Bashi’s rough, calloused hand massaged deeply into her skin. “Do you feel anything when I do that?”
“Pain. Just a little.” She hesitated. She knew what Egey Bashi did should not have hurt at all.
“It works like their brand mark,” Egey Bashi said. “Lighter, but with time it will probably become visible.”
Mai placed a hand over her arm, pulling her sleeve into place. The gesture felt possessive – and intimate, sending a surge of warmth down her spine. Mai didn’t normally dominate her at all. The fact that he was acting this way now showed how unsettled he was.
“When you fought Aghat Raishan just now, how did the sensation start?” Egey Bashi asked.
She swallowed. “It started as a memory. I thought of their vortex, what it felt like to be caught in it. And then it became too real, all too suddenly. As if I was caught in it again.” She shivered. She would never forget the relief of waking up and seeing Mai’s face leaning over her. “If you sedate me, would it prevent them from using the link?” Would it stop these memories from coming back, again and again?
Egey Bashi shook his head. “We cannot be certain. Not without learning more about it--which I am doing, as fast as I can.” He pointed to a pile of books and scrolls on a table by the window. “In the meantime, it is imperative for you, Aghat Kara, to refrain from any dangerous activities that involve your Majat skill. Fighting included, I am sorry to say.”
Kara quickly glanced at Mai. “I never though sparring with Raishan on a practice range could be considered dangerous.”
A quick grin slid over Mai’s face. Normally, Diamonds were not permitted to fight each other, even in practice. Trainers always worried about needless injuries, especially when it came to the top Gem ranks. Of course, trainers couldn’t possibly understand the ultimate pleasure of fighting a warrior whose skill matched yours. She knew Mai understood exactly how it felt, even if, as the Guildmaster, he was supposed to disapprove. To think that she may never be able to do it again…
“Have you tried to block this feeling when it arises?” Egey Bashi asked.
“Yes. By stilling my mind. I think this was why the spiders did not bite me. When I stilled my mind, they calmed down. Eventually.” Another memory I’d rather not dwell on. She snuggled closer to Mai, reassured by his warmth, the firmness of his sculpted muscle against her leaning shoulder. At least for now, with only Mai and Egey Bashi present, she didn’t need to pretend to be tougher than she felt.
“Stilling your mind?” Egey Bashi raised his eyebrows.
“It’s a Majat training technique,” she explained. “Clearing the mind
of all emotions and thoughts. It’s like focusing, but not quite. It also helps in fighting.” She paused. Every Majat could do it, but it was so hard to explain the concept to the outsider.
The Keeper nodded slowly. “I think I know what you mean, Aghat. Keepers call it meditation – even though achieving the level you speak about is possible only for a few.”
She shrugged. Her Diamond ranking required a lot of skills possible only to a few. It didn’t surprise her that others tried and failed at a similar thing.
“Were you able to confirm if the Kaddim can use the link to hear us, or read my mind, Magister?”
“We are still not certain,” Egey Bashi said. “That’s why I have collected all these books.”
Kara looked at him grimly. “Until you learn otherwise, Magister, we must assume that if I come to know anything about our plans, there will always be a danger that the Kaddim would be able to extort this information from my mind somehow. Which means you should probably keep this information from me, just in case.”
Egey Bashi’s gaze softened. “I hate for this to be happening, Aghat.”
She briefly looked away. “Me too, Magister, believe me.”
“I admire your spirit – and please be assured that I will do everything I possibly can to address this situation. However, barring another solution, for the time being you should probably develop a habit of always stilling your mind – if that’s what you call it.”
“I suppose I could try,” she said. “In a way, it would somewhat resemble being sedated all the time, even if it would be less noticeable on the outside.”
The Keeper exchanged a glance with Mai again. She shivered at the thought of the precarious position her situation was putting him into. As the attack leader, Mai had to drive all these decisions, hiding his plans from her, excluding her from every important conversation.
“Perhaps,” Mai said, “we should take it one step at a time. Your participation in our plans would become critical only later on. Until then, you can travel with us without knowing any plans – and perhaps learn to control the link, so that by the time we need you to act, you can be confident you won’t be giving anything away to the enemy.”
