by Arlene James
She shrugged. Then she fluffed her bangs in that nervous way she had and said, “I could use a cold drink. How does lemonade sound? I think I’ll make some lemonade.”
“Sounds good,” Rex told her, disappointed that she seemed to be looking for a reason to get away from him.
Smiling, she turned and went into the house, saying, “I’ll take some to Wes.”
Of course she would. She’d do everything she could to help while she was here. And then she’d leave him. Them. Unless he found some way to make her want to stay.
* * *
Mrs. Lightner couldn’t come the next day, so Rex had to wait until Friday. It was just as well. They would only be gone a few hours, but Callie insisted on cooking as if they’d be gone for days, making sure that meals were prepared ahead of time. Only when she opened the freezer to show Mrs. Lightner where she’d stored the baby’s milk did Rex realize that she’d been storing up weeks’ worth of prepared meals for when she left the Straight Arrow behind. The sight of all those neatly labeled and stacked containers sent Rex’s heart into a panicked gallop.
He practically dragged her outside to the waiting car, which he’d uncovered earlier.
“Wow,” she said, looking at the expensive, low-slung Porsche in which he’d taken such pride. “Are you going to put the top down?”
“Sure,” he said, holding her elbow as she slid down into the bucket seat. “Since it’s the last time I’m ever going to drive it, I intend to enjoy the full experience.”
“The last time?” she echoed as he closed her door.
He walked around and dropped down behind the steering wheel before answering her. “Yep.”
He’d left his hat behind, but he slid his sunglasses into place before he started the engine. The throaty rumble made him smile. He did like a fast car. Funny, he hadn’t thought much about this one in weeks.
“Please tell me you’re not selling this to cover paying off the church loan.”
He chuckled as he backed the car around and shifted into first. “Nope. I’m trading it for a new truck.”
She gaped at him.
“What? It’s a really nice truck. Double cab, leather seats, state-of-the-art sound system, all the bells and whistles. Tax deductible, too. You’ll like it.”
She laughed. “You’re really serious. You’re staying.”
“I keep telling you.” He eased the car up onto the dry, red-clay dirt road, reminding himself that it needed oiling before winter. “Hang on,” he warned. Then he gunned the engine, popped the clutch and let that bad boy scream. It threw up a red cloud that would be visible for miles.
They were both laughing when they reached the pavement. He stopped long enough to let the cloud settle before he stowed the top. Then he turned east toward Ardmore and tried to keep the speed limit within sight. About halfway there, he offered to let Callie drive, but she declined.
“I’m doing just fine where I am, thank you.”
“Okay. It’s not that you can’t drive a standard, though. Right?”
“Bite your tongue.”
He grinned. “Because that’s all right. The truck’s an automatic, by the way.”
“I can drive a standard. Any standard.”
“This one’s specially geared, but I know you could get the hang of it.”
“I’m not driving your car, Rex.”
“How about my truck?”
“We’ll see.”
She drove them to lunch some three hours later in his brand-new ruby-red platinum edition Ford F-450. Every salesman, mechanic and detailer on the lot had come out to see Rex’s Porsche when they’d arrived. Rex figured they’d double the mileage on it joyriding in the thing before they got it sold, if they even tried to sell it. From the way the owner of the dealership dickered over the price, Rex assumed that he would be enjoying the car himself. Made no difference to Rex. The way Callie mooned over the truck he’d ordered was enough for him to let the Porsche go without the least regret.
They wound up at an even trade, which was really in the dealership’s favor as the heavily customized Boxster Spyder was the most expensive two-seater that Porsche made, but Rex couldn’t have been happier to sit up there in the shotgun seat of the pickup truck while Callie drove them off the lot. All through lunch she rhapsodized about the truck.
“I can’t believe that little car got you that great big, tricked-out truck. Remind me to take you with me if I ever buy a new car.”
Rex smiled. “I’ll do that.”
“You know your dad’s still going to want to ride around with the windows down,” she told him, and he laughed.
“Yeah, you’re probably right.”
“I could just move in,” she said. “Seriously. I’ve lived in worse. Much worse.”
“No bathroom,” he pointed out, about to say that she could just stay right where she was.
“Really?” she quipped. “It’s got everything else.”
The waitress showed up just then to see if their meal was satisfactory. Callie asked for mustard for her onion rings.
“You eat mustard on your onion rings?” Rex asked, surprised by this fact he hadn’t known about her.
She nodded. “I’ve always heard that cooked onion and mustard are both good for stomach issues, so I eat them together. By the way, your father’s dietician told me not to give him raw onions. I’m sure Meri knows, but I thought I ought to tell you.”
That reminder that Meredith would soon arrive and Callie soon go dampened the mood.
“I don’t want you to leave us,” he said quietly.
For a long moment she sat in silence. Then she said, “It’s best for everyone.”
Rex wanted to howl and throw things. Instead, he picked up his hamburger and stuffed it into his mouth.
They left the restaurant fifteen minutes later, and Rex drove them to the local office supply store, where he bought a nice combination printer. Then they were off to the home improvement store, where Callie quickly picked out a porch swing and all the necessary accessories. Rex paid for and loaded all the necessary supplies and accessories into the back of his brand-new truck before opening the passenger door for Callie.
Once more he held her by the elbow until she was settled. This time she climbed up rather than down. During the whole process, he fought the almost overwhelming urge to pull her into his arms and kiss her until she figured out everything he couldn’t seem to find the words to say. But they were in a public parking lot in broad daylight on a weekday, and he had no confidence that she would welcome his overtures any more than she’d welcomed Ben Dolent’s. At least she had to know Rex wasn’t after her for her money. Didn’t she?
He brooded on that all the way home, and then he walked in the door to find his father sitting at the kitchen table, sipping a cup of coffee, a smile on his face.
“You should see Rex’s new truck,” Callie said, speaking her first words in almost an hour.
“Can’t wait,” Wes enthused, getting to his feet, a process noticeably less laborious than only a few days ago.
“Where’s Mrs. Lightner?” Callie asked.
“She went up to be sure the phone didn’t wake Bodie.”
“Who called?” Rex asked, waiting for his dad to reach him so he could walk him out to see the truck.
“Meri.” Wes’s smile widened. “Her leave has come through at long last. She’ll be here on Monday.”
Monday. Meredith would arrive on Monday. And Callie would leave.
The world seemed to shift beneath Rex’s feet. Giving no sign that she had even heard, Callie went to the counter and began to put away the lunch dishes that Mrs. Lightner had hand-washed and left drying beside the kitchen sink. Wes laid a hand on Rex’s arm, recalling him to the moment.
Turning woodenly, Rex walked
his father from the room, down the hall and out the back door, where he gave an energetic rundown of the truck’s many features, the words spilling out of his mouth without conscious thought, while his heart silently broke.
* * *
Callie wanted to cry. She’d known it was coming, and she knew it was for the best, but leaving Straight Arrow Ranch would be one of the most difficult things she’d ever done. Nevertheless, after putting it off as long as she could, she quietly began to pack after dinner on Saturday evening.
It had taken only minutes to throw her things into a few bags and boxes when she’d left her father’s house to come here, but she couldn’t bring herself to leave the Straight Arrow the same way. Leaving her father’s home had been an act of desperation; parting from the Straight Arrow could be done only with gratitude and regret.
She started by carefully folding and packing the winter clothing that she and Bodie hadn’t had the chance to wear since coming here. As she did this, her heart bleeding a little more with every garment that she folded and stowed, she listened to the faint sounds of her daughter giggling below stairs as Rex entertained her. He’d learned exactly what tickled Bodie most and would often have the baby howling with laughter that shook her little belly and made her eyes dance with delight. Bodie was going to miss him so much, almost as much as her mother would.
Callie dashed tears from her eyes, boxed some toys and blankets that were rarely used and put it all away for now. She just couldn’t face more at the moment. Sitting down in the rocking chair, she stared out the window into the gloomy dusk and tried to pray, thanking God once again for working out her issues with her father. Even as she rejoiced in this new peace with her dad, a pall of silence seemed to settle over the house. She couldn’t shake the feeling that this had become a house of mourning.
Rattled, she began to pray for Wes’s healing. He would be headed back to Oklahoma City for another chemotherapy treatment before long. But she wouldn’t be there this time. She wouldn’t be needed, Callie knew. Still, it hurt to think that she wouldn’t be an active part of Wes’s battle any longer, not there, not here.
She wondered how Rex would manage with the rye and barley that was about ready to harvest. No doubt he would simply put it off for a few days, risking rain, or perhaps he would stay here at the Straight Arrow while Meri accompanied their father to the city for his treatment. If the latter should be the case, then Rex would be here alone. Callie wondered if she could find a way to come out and at least warm up his dinner for him. Maybe her father would give her a car to drive.
She certainly couldn’t stay here alone with Rex. She knew it, and Rex had to know it, too.
Once again, she understood that leaving was for the best. Should she stay, Rex would feel that he had to go to the city with his dad if only to avoid being alone here with her. No, with Meredith here, staying made zero sense. She had to face it.
The time to go had arrived.
Callie turned to find Rex standing in the doorway of her bedroom, Bodie in his arms.
“I think we need a dry diaper.”
“I can take care of that,” Callie said, injecting a brightness she didn’t feel into her voice. She rose and went to get her daughter.
Even Bodie seemed oddly subdued as she slipped into her mother’s arms. She lay quietly on the foot of Callie’s bed, her gaze switching back and forth between her mom and Rex as Callie swiftly changed her. The air seemed charged with unspoken words and unrecognized emotion, so heavy that breathing felt difficult. Callie tried to think of what to say.
I want to stay, but unless you love me, there’s just no reason for it.
That would be the same as begging Rex to love her, and if he hadn’t come to that on his own, what good was it?
To cover her wavering, Callie decided to go ahead and dress Bodie for bed.
“Will you hold her while I get out her pajamas?”
“Sure.”
She passed the baby back to Rex and went to the dresser, trying not to remember how he’d bobbled Bodie in the beginning and compare that with how easily and naturally he handled her now. Like a father. Like a proud, doting father.
We doubt she understands what she’s saying, but she’s starting to imitate sounds. She can say ‘Mama’ now... She’s a smart one, that’s for sure.
We. As if they were a couple raising their daughter together. Callie shook off the thought and concentrated on the task at hand.
The drawer with Bodie’s things seemed sadly empty now that her winter clothing had been packed. Callie plucked out the one-piece garment she wanted and took back her daughter, stripping off her little short set and trading it for the soft, knit pajamas.
“Now, you just need feeding, and you’ll be all ready for bed.”
Rising, she parked Bodie on her hip and moved to the door, but instead of shifting out of her way, Rex lifted both arms and blocked her, bracing his forearms against the doorjamb. Callie had avoided looking him in the eye thus far, but now she tilted back her head and did so.
“Rex?” she queried softly.
“No,” he said, with a slight shake of his head. “I can’t let you leave.”
His blue gaze plumbed hers, speeding her heart and freezing the air in her lungs. She stepped back, not daring to assume, to hope—only to pray.
Chapter Fifteen
He had been unbearably stupid, not to mention cowardly. Rex had been telling himself that after Callie moved back to her father’s house he would see her around town, that they would date and he would win her heart that way, but he’d been kidding himself. Deep down, he knew that if he let her out of this house he’d never get her back again. After all, he couldn’t be the only man to see what an absolute treasure she was. Ben Dolent wouldn’t win her heart but someone would.
It might as well be him. It had to be him.
“You can’t let me leave,” she said, “because...”
“Because I can hardly bear to let you out of my sight,” he heard himself say. Her eyes widened, and he feared that he’d frightened her. “I—I know that you’ve had enough controlling men in your life,” he hastened to add. “That’s not what this is about.”
“Okay,” she said cautiously, clutching Bodie a little tighter. “What is it about, then?”
Rubbing a hand over his face, he tried to call upon his training, form a lawyerly argument for why he should step into the role of husband and father for Callie and her baby. Sadly, all he could think about in that moment was himself.
His gaze swept over the baby. He’d never expected to become so fond of that kid. His heart smiled every time she lifted her little arms to him, every time she grinned at him or patted his head. How could he let her grow up without him? He couldn’t bear the thought of not being there to see her take her first steps and put together her first sentence and all the other firsts awaiting her.
More than that, he wanted to be at Callie’s side when Bodie did those things. He wanted to share Callie’s laughter and tears, her joy and pain. He needed to be the one to hold her when fear and worry overshadowed her usual good sense and stalwart faith. How could he work all day and drag his tired body home at night without knowing she’d be there to welcome him?
He gulped down his misgivings and began to speak, praying that the right words would come.
“I can’t imagine a day without you anymore.”
* * *
Callie listened to the quavering timbre of his voice and knew it was one he’d never used in a courtroom. This awkward, solemn man who stepped forward and seized her by the upper arms as if he would make her hear him had never stood before the bar or pleaded a less reasoned, more heartfelt case.
“I don’t want anyone else to help me off with my boots when I’m too tired to stand,” he said urgently, “o-or flick me with a dishtowel when I tease her.”
“I—I’m not sure what you’re saying,” Callie told him, confused.
As if he fought the urge to shake her, his hands tightened convulsively on her arms. “Who am I going to push in that new porch swing if you leave?” he pleaded. “Who do I sit with in church?”
“Your sisters—”
“My sisters can’t replace you,” he insisted, “not for me. I love them, but that’s not the same.”
Callie blinked, wanting to believe he meant what she hoped he meant. “I—I guess I need more than what you’ve said so far, Rex.”
He cupped one of his big hands against her cheek and the other around Bodie’s little head. “How am I supposed to get through the day without seeing these faces or hearing your voices?”
Callie smiled and leaned her cheek into his palm. “We won’t abandon you. We’ll always be around somewhere.”
“That’s not good enough!” he exclaimed, dropping his hands to park them at his hips. “What good is saving the ranch if there’s nobody to save it for?”
“You were never saving the Straight Arrow for me and Bodie,” Callie pointed out.
“But I could be,” he said, seizing her and pulling them to him. “You’re practically family now. It wouldn’t take much to make you both family.”
“No?” she asked hopefully.
His gaze swept over her face. “You’d just have to marry me,” he said swiftly. “Then you’d have as much right to the Broken Arrow as I do.”
Her heart slamming against her ribs, she stared into his agonized blue gaze and softly said, “I love this ranch and everyone on it, but that’s not what would keep me here.”
“Then what?” Rex demanded, folding her close. “Tell me how I can keep you with me.”
Callie took a deep breath and a brave step forward. “Do you love me, Rex?”
He almost melted. The planes and lines of his face relaxed. The arms about her warmed.
