by Amy Clipston
Contents
Cover
Title Page
Evergreen Love Dedication
Featured Characters
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
Holiday of Hope Dedication
Epigraph
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
Wreathed in Joy Dedication
Prologue
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
Epilogue
A Christmas Prayer Dedication
Epigraph
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
Discussion Questions
Acknowledgments
Glossary
About the Authors
Copyright
Evergreen Love
Dedication
With love and appreciation for Zac Weikal and the members of my Bakery Bunch
1
Lorene lifted her head after a silent prayer and surveyed the supper table, set with her father’s favorite meal. Mamm had made breaded pork chops, mashed potatoes, green beans, and homemade applesauce for Dat almost weekly, and for the last four years, Lorene had believed continuing that gift of love was the right thing to do.
But now Dat looked at her with a familiar sadness, and for the first time, she had second thoughts.
“Danki for making all this, Lorene.” He was only in his late fifties, but he seemed to have aged at least a decade since they’d lost Mamm to a bad case of flu. His brown hair and beard were threaded with gray, and the wrinkles around his eyes and mouth seemed even deeper lately. This was only mid-October, but perhaps he was already struggling with how challenging celebrating Thanksgiving and Christmas had proved to be without the woman he loved.
“Gern gschehne.” Lorene forced a smile, then glanced across the table at her younger sister. Emma Grace always reminded her of Mamm, in part because she’d been blessed with their mother’s reddish-brown hair. Lorene had instead inherited fiery-red locks. She’d been told her coloring matched her maternal great-grandmother’s, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t a little envious of her sister’s more toned-down looks. Silly, since at twenty-four, Emma Grace was six years her junior.
Emma Grace shifted in her seat, and then instead of filling her plate, she began folding and unfolding her paper napkin.
Dat halted his reach for the platter of pork chops. “Emma Grace, are you all right?”
“Ya.” She pushed the ties from her prayer covering off her shoulders and then sat straighter before looking at him. “It’s just time for . . . an announcement.” She looked at Lorene with hesitation in her deep-brown eyes.
Lorene set her fork on her plate and then divided a look between her father and sister, suddenly feeling as if she’d been left out of some secret. “What announcement?” She lifted her glass of water and took a drink.
“Well . . . Jonathan and I are engaged.”
Lorene gasped, then choked. Setting down her glass, she coughed and coughed, working to regain her composure.
“Take a deep breath.” Dat tapped her back.
Lorene wiped her eyes and settled herself before staring at her sister. “Did you say you’re engaged to Jon?”
“That’s right. And I’m so froh.” All hesitation gone, Emma Grace displayed a wide grin, and a faraway look appeared on her face. “We’ve chosen the Tuesday two days before Christmas for our wedding. You know Christmastime is my favorite season. I can already envision Christmas kichlin at the reception.”
Lorene’s mind spun as she studied her sister’s face for any sign of a lie. If she was lying, she’d become a good actress. “Is this a joke?”
“No.” Emma Grace frowned, then looked at Dat as if for his confirmation. When he gave a little nod, Lorene gasped again.
“So you’ve known about this,” she said to him. She heard the accusation in her tone, but she couldn’t seem to help it.
Dat blinked. “Well, of course I have. I had to give Jon my blessing.”
Emma Grace’s smile wobbled when Lorene returned her gaze to her sister.
“You’re marrying Jonathan Lapp.”
“Ya. I am.”
“Jonathan Lapp from our church district.” Lorene said the name slowly, trying to wade through what this meant for them all—for her.
Now Emma Grace narrowed her eyes. “Ya. Why do you keep repeating his name? It’s not like you don’t know him or that we’ve been dating.”
Lorene tried to swallow against her suddenly dry throat. Emma Grace was planning to marry her ex-fiancé’s younger brother. The room started to spin, and she took deep breaths in an effort to calm her stampeding heart.
Emma Grace tilted her head. “Are you all right, Lorene?”
Lorene shook herself from her panic. How could her sister ask such a question? She had to know how much this news would throw her even after all these years. That’s why she’d been hesitant to tell her, right?
“But you’ve been dating only since April.” She counted off the months on her fingers. “That’s six months. Why are you in such a hurry?”
Now Emma Grace lifted her chin as though offended. “We’re in love, and we’re froh. We’ve also prayed about this, and a short engagement feels right. I’m twenty-four, and he’s almost twenty-five, and we’re ready to settle down and have a family. Why wait? Again, it just feels right.” She gestured at their father. “Dat has given his permission, as have the bishop and deacon.”
“But this still seems awfully rushed. Where will you live?”
“Here.” Emma Grace pointed toward the floor.
“What?” Lorene turned her eyes to Dat, and he nodded again. Then she looked back at Emma Grace. “You and Jon are going to live here?”
“Ya. When Jon told his parents he planned to propose, they said we could live with them. First, they have plenty of room since Elias and Joyce live in the haus Elias built for her on their property. And second, because then Jon could continue running the dairy farm with his dat and Elias.”
Lorene pressed her lips together. She was perfectly aware that Elias Zook, just before he married Jon’s older sister, Joyce, had built a house for her—on the land where Ryan was supposed to build a house for Lorene. But Ryan never got around to building it, and then . . .
Her stomach twisted, and she had to work to keep a flood of memories from pulling her under.
“But then,” Emma Grace continued, now talking a mile a minute, “our parents helped us work through a new plan. If Jon works this farm with Dat instead, he can take it over when Dat retires. That means Elias can take over the Lapps’ dairy farm someday. After all, Ryan moved away and started a new career, so he’s not in the picture when it comes to the farm.”
Lorene stilled at the mention of her ex-fiancé’s name, questions swirling through her mind. Last she’d heard, Ryan was still working for his uncle’s shed company in Gap, a nearby town. But was he married with a family? Or at least engaged? No one had ever told her either was the case—not that she’d asked. But that didn’t mean he wasn’t.
She closed her eyes for a beat and willed herself to stop thinking about the man. Ryan’s business was his, not hers. Then she gritted her teeth and pushed o
n, determined to convince her sister to change her mind—or at least slow down.
“Have you truly thought this through? We’d have barely two months to plan the wedding. Why don’t you wait . . . maybe until spring?”
Emma Grace’s eyes misted as she turned back to their father. “You said she would support me, Dat. That it would all work out, the way Jon and I believe God intends. But she’s trying to—”
Dat placed his hand on top of Emma Grace’s. “Don’t worry. It will all be fine.” But his eyes had moved to Lorene.
“No, it won’t.” Emma Grace sniffed, then glared at Lorene. “I was afraid of this. At first I thought this might be hard for you because of Ryan. But now I think you’re just jealous because you’ve never found anyone else in the five years since you broke up with him.” She caught her breath as her eyes narrowed. “You don’t want me to be froh! You want me to be lonely and bedauerlich like you!”
Emma Grace jumped up, then practically ran for the stairs. Her heavy footfalls echoed from the stairwell, followed by the loud slam of a door.
Lorene stared at her plate as a suffocating silence filled the kitchen. She reached for the bowl of green beans but then withdrew her hand. Her appetite had evaporated. She cringed at the thought of Emma Grace marrying into Ryan’s family, but how could her sister fail to realize the full extent of the challenge this marriage would present for her?
“You were awfully hard on her.” Dat’s voice was soft, but his words were heavy.
“Ya, I was, but her attack on me was quite pointed, and . . . Jealousy isn’t the issue, Dat.” Her throat seemed to close as guilt threatened to strangle her, but she didn’t want Dat to know how much she was struggling. “I just don’t want her to rush into this and then regret it later. They’ve dated such a short time.”
Dat’s dark eyes grew warm even as she fudged the truth. “Lorene, we’ve known the Lapps for years. They’re a gut Christian family. I’d like to stop hiring farmhands for the help I need, and Jon’s being here will allow that. Also, rather than sell the farm someday, I’ll be able to hand it over to one of mei dochdern and her spouse.”
Lorene pressed her lips together. She had to come to grips with reality. She might have been that daughter, but now she never would. She’d just failed to let herself imagine anything like this could happen. How foolish! What had made her think Jon and Emma Grace’s relationship would never blossom into love?
“Emma Grace and Jon grew up together,” Dat continued, “and your mamm and I were childhood freinden. Our marriage was froh.” He paused, his eyes now nearly pleading with her. “I want mei kinner to stay in the faith and be froh. Jon is not only a gut Amish man, but he makes Emma Grace froh. He’s also offering her a life on this dairy farm, the place she’s always known and loved. It’s a tough life, but it’s a gut life.”
He gave a sad sigh. “What more could I possibly hope for her? After all, we never know how long God has planned for us to be here, do we?”
Lorene nodded as his eyes misted. It was obvious he was referring to Mamm. Now shame grabbed her by the throat, stealing her words.
Dat gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze. “Trust God to lead your schweschder.”
Lorene sniffed as tears formed. How could she stand in the way of Emma Grace having a happy life? “I know you’re right, Dat.”
He gave her a wistful smile. “Your mamm would be so froh to see Emma Grace settling down.”
Lorene wiped at her eyes. Especially since I’m thirty with no viable prospects for a husband. She stood. “I’ll go apologize, then ask her to come back to eat with us.”
“Danki.” Dat reached out and touched her hand. “We need to support her.”
“Of course. You go ahead before the food gets cold.”
She rose from the table and strode to the staircase, then climbed to the second floor. A crisp breeze filtered through the open window at the top of the stairs, sending in the scent of logs burning in neighborhood fireplaces.
Lorene stood outside her sister’s closed bedroom door for a moment, saying a silent prayer.
Lord, please give me the right words to apologize and earn mei schweschder’s forgiveness. Also, please soften my heart toward the idea of her marriage to Jon Lapp.
Then she knocked.
“Go away.”
“I’m coming in.” Lorene pushed the door open and found her sister lying on her bed, facing the wall. “I’m sorry.”
When Emma Grace remained silent, Lorene sank onto the desk chair and nervously brushed her hands over her black apron, peppered with spots from cooking. “I should have been more encouraging, and I sincerely apologize. If Jon makes you froh, then I support you fully.”
Emma Grace craned her neck to look over her shoulder. “You mean that?”
“Absolutely.” Her voice sounded strained to her own ears, and she hoped Emma Grace wouldn’t notice.
“I’m sorry for what I said too. It was mean and hurtful. I was afraid this might be hard for you, but then—”
“It’s okay.” Lorene shrugged even though her sister’s words had stung. “When did Jon propose?”
“Last week, after he spoke with Dat.” Emma Grace sat up. “We met with the deacon and bishop the next day. Then Jon told his parents, and that’s when the plans for where we would live started to develop. Elias and Joyce don’t know about this yet. Jon’s going to tell them at a family supper tomorrow night.”
Lorene smiled as her eyes filled once again. “I really am froh for you.”
Emma Grace nodded. Then her eyes grew misty too. “And I really am sorry. What I said about Ryan was a cheap shot, and you didn’t deserve it. I never wanted to hurt you with any of this.”
Lorene was suddenly unable to speak. Part of her wanted to ask Emma Grace questions about Ryan, but she couldn’t form the words. She had to admit the truth, though—at least to herself. She’d longed to know what Ryan’s life was like in Gap ever since her sister announced she was dating Ryan’s younger brother.
She fingered the hem of her apron as his handsome face filled her mind. She could still envision his pale-blue eyes, naturally curly light-brown hair, inviting smile . . .
No, no, no!
She’d had no choice but to break off their engagement. Leaving their relationship had made sense, and she couldn’t live in the past. She was certain Ryan had moved on, and she would continue to do the same.
Emma Grace’s dark eyes warmed as she reached out and touched Lorene’s arm. “Are you all right?”
“Ya.” Lorene forced her lips into a smile. “We need to start talking about wedding plans. We don’t have much time to pull them all together.”
“I know, but it’s going to be so much fun. Like I said, I want Christmas kichlin—a whole Christmas theme with evergreen branches, candles . . .” Her expression turned serious. “But most of all, I want your blessing. You’re mei schweschder. You’re important to me.”
“You have my blessing.” Lorene pulled her into a hug. “I was just surprised. But I’ll be supportive from now on. That’s a promise.”
She’d been more than surprised, but she’d have to get over it.
“Danki.” Emma Grace’s smile was nearly as bright as the fall sunshine streaming through the front room windows as they’d cleaned them that afternoon.
“I have something to ask you,” Emma Grace said, again hesitant. “Jon’s invited the three of us to his haus for lunch on Sunday. Will you come?”
“Of course I will.”
Emma Grace bit her lower lip. “Ryan might be there.”
Lorene’s stomach dropped.
“Will you still come?” Emma Grace’s eyes were hopeful, reminding Lorene of a puppy dog. “For me?”
Lorene nodded, but her body tensed. “Of course I will. And I’ll be fine.”
“Danki.” Emma Grace hugged her.
“Why don’t we go downstairs? We can discuss wedding plans while we eat.”
“Okay.” Emma Grace popped up and s
tarted for the door. “We have so much to talk about.”
As Lorene followed her down the stairs, her mind spun with both excitement and dread. She really was thrilled to see her sister happy, but she cringed at the idea of this new connection to Ryan Lapp. The two of them would soon be related through their siblings, though, and she’d have to beg God for the strength she’d need to see her through.
2
After his driver dropped him off, Ryan breathed in the cool evening air and climbed the back steps to his parents’ home. He’d been surprised when his mother called and insisted he come for supper on Saturday night, explaining that Jon wanted the entire family together. When he’d asked her why, she’d just mumbled something about how she really couldn’t say.
Curious.
Until she called, he’d planned to stay late at work so he could finish building a large shed that had to be delivered next week. But thankfully his uncle Jay believed a family supper took priority. Ryan would make up the time on Monday.
When he reached the back porch of the large, white, two-story farmhouse, he glanced behind him, toward his father’s rolling pasture and row of three red barns. Beyond them he spotted his older sister’s two-story home. No lanterns glowed in the windows, indicating that Joyce and her family were most likely already at their parents’ house.
He lifted his hand to knock on the door, but then he shook his head, smiling as he recalled his mother instructing him to never knock. “You might live in Gap now, but you’re still our sohn,” she’d told him.
Ryan stepped into the mudroom and was immediately drawn to the familiar aromas of his mother’s baked chicken and freshly baked bread as well as the familiar voices filtering from the next room. He removed his boots, straw hat, and jacket, then padded into the kitchen to join his family. Mamm and Joyce were carrying food to the table, where Dat, Jon, and Elias already waited. His nieces were there too. At three and thirteen months, Maranda and Barbiann were the light of their parents’ lives, to say nothing of how special they were to their uncles.
