by Fern Britton
‘Loveday,’ said Jesse. ‘I love you.’
‘Don’t, please don’t say that.’ Loveday’s eyes welled with unspent tears. ‘You’re Greer’s husband now and I wish you all the happiness in the world.’
He reached up and took hold of her hand.
‘I mean it, Loveday. I love you and I’ll never regret what happened last night.’
‘Nor me. I’ll never forget it and I’ll never tell anyone neither.’ Loveday looked so pitiful.
‘Come out of there and let me hold you,’ he begged.
‘Someone will see.’
‘No they won’t.’
‘They will.’
They looked at each other in a tragic impasse over the partition wall. Tentatively he asked, ‘Loveday, am I … was I the first to …? Have you ever done … that with Mickey … or anyone?’
She shook her head. ‘I’ve never let Mickey touch me.’
Jesse was surprised. ‘But he told me that you had.’
‘Well, he would, wouldn’t he? But I couldn’t. Not with Mickey and not while I was waiting for you.’
They stood in their tragic tableau, neither knowing what to say.
‘You’ve got to go,’ said Loveday with finality. ‘You’ve got a plane to catch, haven’t you?’
They heard the outer door opening again and Loveday jumped down so that she wouldn’t be seen. A familiar voice called out, ‘Loveday? Are you in there? I’m going to change into my going-away outfit and I need my bridesmaid to help.’
Loveday flushed her loo and came out, smoothing down the hated dress over her curves.
‘Here I am.’
*
It had started to snow heavily again. The taxi company had sent a big white Range Rover to make sure that it would get out of Trevay and up the hill towards the A30 safely. Jesse helped Greer into the back seat before climbing in next to the driver. Greer opened her electric window and immediately a flurry of snow and a handful of pink and blue confetti flew into her face, landing prettily on her eyelashes and the lace of her suit jacket.
‘Catch!’ she shouted, throwing her bouquet towards Loveday.
Loveday tried hard not to catch it. She closed her eyes tight as the beautiful flowers arced through the snow-filled air. But the fates had decreed that it land in the centre of Loveday’s chest, scraping the skin, and she had no option but to let the flowers fall into her arms. Mickey slid his arm around her waist and gave her a beerily passionate kiss on the lips.
The crowd ooh’d and aah’d and someone shouted, ‘Run Mickey, run!’ to a burst of laughter.
*
Jesse, sitting on his sun bed, shivered with the dreadful memory and took another swig of his cold beer.
‘Yeah. It all seems unreal.’
Greer leant over and kissed her husband. ‘I can’t wait to get home and show off this tan. A tan in January seems so luxurious. Loveday will be so jealous.’
Jesse shifted away from her. ‘She’s not like that.’
‘Yes, she is. She’d love Mickey to bring her on a holiday like this.’ Greer sniggered. ‘Not that he’d know how to leave Cornwall. Has he ever crossed the Tamar?’
Jesse hated it when Greer ran Mickey down. ‘Leave it, Greer. I couldn’t afford to bring you here if your dad hadn’t paid.’
Greer reached her hand to his face and stroked his cheek. ‘Don’t be angry. I was teasing. I know how lucky we are.’ She sat up and pushed her sunglasses on to her head. ‘Aren’t you excited about our new house, though?’
‘Yeah.’
‘Well, don’t sound too enthusiastic.’ Greer looked down at her manicured toes. ‘Are you cross that Mum and Dad have done it and we don’t even know what it looks like?’
Jesse frowned. ‘A bit.’
‘Ah, my poor caveman. Did you want to go out with your club and bash the other troglodytes on the head to steal the best cave?’ She ran her fingers down his chest and tickled his stomach. He pushed her hand away.
She was apologetic. ‘I was just teasing.’
‘Well, don’t. Your parents have been very generous. The wedding, this holiday—’
‘Honeymoon.’
‘… honeymoon. Somewhere for us to live …’
‘And an important new job.’
Jesse rubbed his hand over his face. ‘Yes, and the new job.’ Suddenly the latent anxiety lapped at the base of his throat. ‘It’s all too much. I … we … should be making our own lives. Our own decisions.’
Greer saw the anxiety in Jesse’s face and misread its reason.
‘It’s a dream come true for me, Jesse, and I know you’ll be wonderful. Don’t ever think you could let me down. I know how hard you work and what the business means to your dad as well as mine. I’m so proud of you.’ She took his hand in hers. ‘And, one day, you’ll pass it all on to our children. It’s exciting.’
Jesse felt a tightening round his chest. He was like a mackerel, caught in one of his father’s trawl nets.
14
Elizabeth Clovelly couldn’t stop herself from turning the loo paper roll the ‘right’ way round on its holder. Jan Behenna watched her.
‘What did you turn it round for?’
‘The loose edge mustn’t rest against the wall. It must hang out into the room.’
‘Why?’
‘Well, over time, a grease mark will appear on the new paint, from where people’s hands have to touch the wall to pull at the roll.’
‘Oh, I see,’ said Jan, who didn’t.
‘It’s something my mother did; once you know about it, you can’t stop doing it.’ Elizabeth smiled. ‘Sometimes I do it when I’m out. At other people’s houses. Or restaurants. Silly, I know, but it makes sense.’
Jan wondered if this woman had done it in her house. She’d have to check the bloody thing whenever she came round.
Elizabeth was straightening the towels now. ‘Sweet bathroom,’ she managed to say, whilst thinking the exact opposite.
Jan looked round with pride at the room she’d lovingly decorated. She couldn’t wait for Jesse and Greer to see it. The bath, basin and toilet were in aqua blue and she’d chosen dear little tiles to put around the sink, each with a picture of a penguin at his ablutions. One cleaning his teeth, one having a shave and one – her favourite – lying in a bubble bath with a shower hat on his head.
‘Isn’t it?’ She smiled with satisfaction. ‘I never had an indoor bathroom when we first got married. Outdoor privy and a wash in the old Belfast sink in the kitchen. Used to put the boys in there too when they were babies.’
‘That must have been … difficult.’
‘Well, it was fun really. We’d all dry off in front of the fire and Edward would dry my hair by brushing it till it gleamed.’ Jan reached up to her short crop. ‘It used to be thick and had a wave but …’Tis more practical to have it short, isn’t it?’
Elizabeth thought of the monthly bill to have her expensively blond hair cut and coloured and said, ‘Yes, it must be.’
Jan was on the tiny landing now and peeking into the master bedroom. ‘’Tis proper cosy. I love the colour. I’d never have thought of mushroom.’
‘It’s called Drizzle,’ said Elizabeth, pushing past Jan and stepping into the small but light room.
‘Drizzle!’ Jan laughed. ‘How they come up with these names! I’d have done something like blue. Edward says bedrooms need to be blue. Calm, see. And in a marriage you need to stay calm.’
Elizabeth was twitching the duvet and smoothing it straight for the umpteenth time. ‘This has a warm feel, don’t you think?’
‘Oh, definitely.’
Elizabeth checked her slim gold watch. ‘They’ll be here soon. It’s nearly time.’
*
Jesse and Greer were met at the airport by the same driver who’d dropped them off four weeks before. ‘Welcome home, Mr and Mrs Behenna. How was the trip?’ he asked as he stowed the suitcases into the large boot.
Greer clutched at Jesse’s arm. ‘W
onderful, thank you. I can’t believe we’ve been away for such a long time.’
‘The sun’s come out for you,’ he told them, jumping into the front seat and starting the engine. ‘The snow has all gone.’
Jesse felt the need to take charge. ‘Would you drop us off at my parents’ house, please, Fish Lane at the top of Fore Street?’
‘Ah, no, sir. I have another address I have been asked to take you to.’
Greer clapped her hands with glee. ‘Is it our new home?’
‘Can’t possibly say, Mrs Behenna,’ the driver said, looking at her in his rear-view mirror.
‘It is! How exciting.’ Greer took Jesse’s arm and snuggled in. ‘We’re going to our new home.’
The yellow of the early February sun lit the moors as they drove west towards Trevay and the sea. Driving down the hill and into the village, past the peeling grandeur of the old Great Western Hotel, the newlyweds wondered whether the driver would turn left or right along the estuary road. He turned left towards the heart of Trevay. Greer clutched one hand to her chest and the other to Jesse’s arm. ‘I wonder where it is? Will it overlook the harbour, do you think?’
Jesse frowned. The creeping, suffocating certainty that his life was not his own any more was seeping into his psyche. He was in the control of others. He wanted to order the driver to stop the car and let him out so that he could run as fast as he could away from Trevay.
‘Dunno,’ he muttured.
The car went past Fore Street and followed the harbour road round towards the Golden Hind. The driver indicated left and turned into Cobb Lane. Greer leant forward and pointed saying, ‘Look, look!’ On the right Jesse saw a house with ribbons and balloons on the gate. Both sets of parents were waving.
Greer was bouncing on the seat with excitement. ‘It’s Pencil Cottage! I’ve wanted to live here since I was a little girl! Look, Jesse, isn’t it wonderful?’
Jesse looked at the house he’d walked past, and never given a thought to, for almost twenty years. Pencil thin and squeezed between two regular-sized Trevay fishermen’s cottages, this was his new home.
The car rolled to a halt and the faces of Elizabeth and Jan peered in through the back windows, grinning. The driver jumped out and opened Greer’s door for her. She fell into her parents’ arms, where she was showered with hugs and kisses and questions about the honeymoon.
Jesse climbed out and walked to the boot of the Range Rover to help with the bags. ‘I’ll do that, sir,’ said the driver. ‘I think you’re needed to carry something else over the threshold.’
Jesse looked over his shoulder and saw Greer and both sets of parents waiting expectantly for him.
*
Standing in the front room, Bryn spoke first. ‘Now then, young Jesse, please accept Pencil Cottage as a wedding present. It’ll keep you both warm till you can afford your own place. The company has paid for it and it should be a nice little asset for us. When the time comes for you to need a bigger house, the company will sell this and I’ll split the profit with you. That way you’ll have a tidy deposit for a proper family home.’
Jesse experienced three emotions. One, gratitude that this should be happening to him; two, fury that this man had, in one fell swoop, totally emasculated him, and three, the feeling that his balls were being squeezed in an ever-tighter vice.
His father stepped towards him wearing a tight smile. ‘Welcome home, son. Your mother and I couldn’t be more proud of the both of you.’
*
The house might have been thin on the outside but, inside, it went a long way back and up. The front door opened immediately into the sitting room, which was traditional, warm and inviting. Elizabeth had kept it all white with simple furnishings, knowing that her daughter would want to customise the entire house. It led into a smart galley kitchen, which in turn led out to a tiny concreted yard with raised flower beds full of prettily nodding daffodils.
Greer wriggled with joy. ‘I bet this is a suntrap. It feels warm right now!’
Back in the house she pointed out the dishwasher, television, the large framed wedding photo on the mantelpiece that Jan had had printed especially, and the view from the front window.
‘Wait till you see upstairs,’ Jan said, longing for Jesse to see her handiwork in the bathroom.
‘Yes, you’ll love the bedroom, Greer,’ said Elizabeth, leading the way before Jan could get ahead of her.
Jesse’s muscles were beginning to tire where he was attempting to smile with genuine pleasure. Greer kissed his nose and galloped up the stairs ahead of him.
‘Oh, Mummy!’ gasped Greer as she saw the bedroom. ‘It’s so glamorous!’ She called out to the landing: ‘Jesse, quick. In here.’ Jesse ducked his head under the low latched door and absorbed the pinky-brown walls, frilly bed linen and heavy Austrian blind at the window. Greer gripped his arm with eyes wide. ‘Isn’t it stylish?’
Jesse nodded slowly, mystified.
‘He’s overwhelmed, Mummy.’ Greer went to her mother and hugged and kissed her.
Jan, desperate for Jesse to see the bathroom, pulled at his arm. ‘I’ve got something to show you too.’
The bathroom was much more to Jesse’s taste. ‘Oh, Mum. ’Tis lovely.’
Jan beamed with happiness. ‘Look at the penguins!’
Jesse smiled. ‘I like them.’
‘I knew you would, and come here.’ Jan pushed the loo lid shut. ‘Sit here and look at the view!’
He sat. Through the tiny square of the tiny window straight ahead of him, Jesse could just make out his father’s flagship, The Lobster Pot, bobbing gently at anchor in the harbour. Jesse laughed then and shouted out to his father on the landing, ‘Dad, I’ll be able to make sure you’re working hard from here.’ Edward laughed too. ‘Aye. But I’ve checked it out and I can see you doing your business on that toilet if I get my binoculars out.’
Everyone but Greer and Elizabeth laughed heartily.
‘Well, now. I’ve got tea and sandwiches ready, if you want some,’ said Elizabeth, heading back downstairs. ‘There might even be a bottle of bubbly in the fridge.’
*
‘What’s that bleddy ’orrible paint Betty’s put on your bedroom walls?’
Edward had taken his shoes off and was sitting in his favourite armchair back at the family home in Fish Lane. The three Behennas had left Pencil Cottage on the pretext of collecting Jesse’s bits and pieces.
‘Edward.’ Jan looked at her husband sternly. ‘That’s the latest, most stylish colour. And don’t call her Betty. She prefers to be called Elizabeth, as you well know.’
Edward made a grumbling noise. ‘She was Betty when we was all at school together.’
Jan ignored him. ‘So, son, we missed you. What was Gran Canaria like?’
‘Hot. Nice.’
‘Food good?’
‘Not bad. Mind you, I could have murdered a pasty.’
Jan brightened up. ‘I’ve got some ready to heat up if you want one.’
‘Go on then.’ Jesse smiled at his mum as she went to the kitchen.
Edward, making sure she’d left the room before he spoke, asked under his breath, ‘So, everything all right in the bedroom department?’
Jesse squirmed a little. ‘Fine.’
‘Ah. Good. Only some women—’
‘Dad. Please. It’s fine. She’s fine … and that’s all.’
‘Well, that’s all right then.’
‘Yes.’
*
At Pencil Cottage, Greer and her mother were unpacking her suitcases in the bedroom.
‘How was the honeymoon, darling? Was he kind to you?’ asked Elizabeth delicately and without making eye contact with her daughter.
Greer was embarrassed. ‘Yes. He was lovely.’
‘He … didn’t make things uncomfortable for you?’
Greer folded a bikini and put it into one of the new drawers, then sat on the bed. ‘A bit. I think I just have to … get used to it.’
Elizab
eth moved a pile of underwear and sat next to her daughter. ‘It’s not easy at first, but it gets better. It makes men happy. And in time it’ll make you happy too.’
Greer looked into her mother’s eyes. ‘I do love him.’
Elizabeth patted her hand. ‘That’s all you need.’
Downstairs the phone rang and they could hear Bryn answer. ‘’Ello, Mickey … yeah, they’re home safe and sound … right, yeah, we’ll meet you there. Ten minutes? Rightyo.’ He called up the stairs. ‘Get your coats on, that was Mickey. He and Loveday are going down the Hind. They want to welcome you home with a couple of drinks.’
*
The Golden Hind was thick with tobacco smoke and the heady scent of Cornish beer.
Loveday really hadn’t wanted to come. ‘Let them have their first night in their new home by themselves, Mick,’ she’d pleaded.
Mickey was incredulous. ‘They’ve just spent four weeks on their own. If I know Jesse, he’ll be desperate for a beer or two and some male company.’ He added as an afterthought, ‘And Greer will want to see you as well. She’ll want to tell you all about her posh hotel and that.’
‘That’s what I’m afraid of,’ replied Loveday gloomily.
‘That’s my girl.’ Mickey put his arm around her. ‘We’ll have a great night.’
*
Mickey and Loveday got to the pub before anyone else and Loveday stationed herself on one of the Dralon banquettes on the far wall. From there she could see who was coming in and out of the bar. As the place filled up, it would be harder for anyone coming in to spot her first.
Mickey got her a cider shandy and a bag of pork scratchings. ‘There you are. I’m going to wait at the bar. I’ll send Greer over as soon as she arrives.’
Gee, thanks, thought Loveday. Her heart was beating so fast that she could feel the pulse in her neck. Waves of perspiration hit her every few minutes. She felt sick. Had Jesse told Greer what had happened between them? Was he filled with the same longing to see her as she was to see him?
She jumped as the pub door opened, but it was a group of locals trooping in to fill the space with laughter and a blast of cool February air.
