“I miss you.” His voice was low and raspy, as if he didn’t want anyone else in the world to hear his words except me. “I like this, spending time with you, but I still feel like you’re an arm’s length away.” His tender eyes moved back and forth as he took mine in. Perhaps he was searching for answers too. I wanted to give him everything I could.
“I’m right here,” I replied, my voice just as low, just as full of emotion. “I know you’ve been waiting, and we’re nearly there. I just don’t want to fall back into something to have it blow up in my face. I want to be sure.”
His hands moved from my waist, traveling up my back, putting gentle pressure on me, pushing my chest into his, forcing my hands to wind around his neck. We were so close; his nose was touching mine, our breaths intermingling. I could feel the rapid thumping of his heart through the thin cotton of his t-shirt, the buckle of his belt pressing into my belly. I was on my tiptoes, stretching, reaching, arching to him, trying to give him as much of me as I could in that moment. His hands spread wide across my shoulder blades, hot and wild, pulling me in to him.
And then his lips were on mine. It was soft at first; hesitant. Slow and fragile. He kissed me as if he were afraid I was going to dissolve around him. His plush lips brushed over mine and I couldn’t move. I was frozen, hoping this wasn’t one of my many dreams where Riot held and kissed me through the night, only to wake up and find he wasn’t there. I whimpered as his lips pressed against mine with just a fraction more pressure, then nearly collapsed when his tongue traced my bottom lip.
I slowly opened, tentatively dipped my tongue out to meet his, and then we both cracked.
We fractured.
We exploded.
Suddenly, kissing him was more important than breathing. More important than living and seeing and being. All that mattered was his mouth pressed against mine.
Hands grasped at each other, trying to hold on to any part they could find purchase on. My fingers ran through the soft, short hair at his nape, and one of my legs lifted to wrap around his hip. He immediately wrapped one hand around the back of my knee, pulling our centers closer, and then, without warning, he slowly thrust against me.
All I could feel, all I could process, was the ridiculously hard and delicious pressure of his denim-clad cock pressing against my center. Slowly dragging up, causing every nerve in my body to shoot into overdrive, every synapse to fire, every sensory indicator to short circuit. I pulled my mouth away to moan, unable to keep quiet, unable to pretend the contact hadn’t just totally incinerated me from the inside out.
It had been months since my body had felt anything outside of despair and grief, so to suddenly be thrust into sexual overdrive, well, it was a lot to handle. I couldn’t take in enough air, couldn’t hold my hands steady, as they were shaking with need. My heart was thundering in my chest, racing toward oblivion. And it all felt wonderful.
Riot thrust against me one more time, my moan a little louder and a lot needier when his mouth moved down my throat, leaving kisses like breadcrumbs.
“Riot,” I groaned, loving the way his lips trailed along my skin. “Someone could see us out here.”
“I don’t fucking care,” he said, his hand moving from the back of my knee up to grab my ass, pressing our centers together even more. I let him. I let him feast for just a moment more because I was in love with the way I was feeling just then. I felt light, wanted, and free. I felt as though I were floating above us, as if I were watching someone else because, certainly, this was not me. I didn’t live a life where I pushed a man away and he understood why. Where I yelled and screamed at him, blamed him for something so terrible, and he waited patiently, knowing I’d loved him all along. This had to be someone else’s life.
So I let him kiss every part of my skin available to him in that parking lot, let his hands roam over my clothed body, and I loved every single second of it.
Just as I knew he would, he finally came back from the momentary lust-induced insanity, dropped my leg, and simply returned to sweet kisses laid softly on my mouth.
“Fuck, I missed you, Kal.”
The way he said my name, the way his thumb moved over my bottom lip, the heavy way he held me as he said those words, it all swirled around me and I melted into him a little bit more.
“I missed you too.”
“Have I got you back now? Is this for real? I want this. I want us.”
His words went from sweet and meaningful to rushed and a little scared, and I knew it was because he was afraid I would push him away again.
I stared up at him, looking into his eyes, trying to see past the hurt lingering there, past the nearly feral man who just practically took me up against my car in a parking lot, and I looked for the man I fell in love with so many months ago. The man who was gentle and caring, who handled me with exactly the right amount of tenderness, but took charge when I needed that from him. He was still there; I could feel him. And I had to believe if the Riot I fell in love with was still there, waiting for me, then the Kalli he fell in love with had to be somewhere inside me as well.
I fell against him, leaning my forehead into his chest. “I want this too.” I took in a deep breath then exhaled, looking up at him. “I want us. I want you. But…” I felt my bottom lip become trapped between my teeth. “I don’t think I can handle losing you again.”
“Hey,” he said, his hands coming to frame my face. “You never lost me. I know I disappeared, but you didn’t lose me. You understand that, right? I would never abandon you. Not ever. I did what I thought was best for you, but I didn’t want to leave you, Kalli. Not then, not now. Never.”
“I know,” I whispered, wrapping my arms around his neck, letting him hold me. A part of me died to hear the desperation in his voice, the sadness in his words. I’d done that to him. I’d been the one to make him leave, and even though it hurt him, he did it. For me. He was so good. “I just need you to be patient with me.”
“There’s no rush here. I promise. Even though I basically just pushed you up against your car and felt you up, I promise it won’t happen again.” He stepped back, making me want to pull him to me again, but I let him go, watching as he ran the back of his hand over the stubble at his jaw.
Damn.
“Then,” I said with a smile, nearly drunk on happiness, “I’m all yours.”
His sexy smile spread quickly over his face, his dark eyes sparkling in the overhead lights of the parking lot, and in just one second I was back in his arms. He picked me up and spun me around playfully, my laugh ringing out. I sounded happy. I was happy. It was some sort of miracle.
When he finally placed me back on the ground, he kissed me again, but this time it was sweet and innocent. Just happy lips pressed against happy lips. He was still smiling when he pulled away.
“I knew you’d come back to me.”
I kept looking in his eyes as he tucked a lock of wayward hair behind my ear, marveling at how wonderful a man he was.
“I think I knew I’d come back to you too. It’s always been you, Riot.”
Chapter Nine
Give Her The World
Riot
Memories flooded my mind while I leaned up against Kalli’s Range Rover, which was parked in the same spot it had been two nights ago when I had her body pressed against it. When I’d been able to feel her under my hands, kiss her, and her body had been pushed up against mine. I’d always had a hard time controlling myself when it came to Kalli. And now, well, I was taking her to my hometown for the weekend. We’d be surrounded by my mom, dad, and sister for some of the time, and I’d spend the rest of the time trying not to rid her of all her clothes and let my body sink into hers.
Perhaps this was a bad idea.
Months.
Months I’d gone with just the memories of what it felt like to be with her, to have her body wrapped around mine, or to feel her pulse beneath my hand as I kissed her. Then, last night, we both let down our guards for just a little while, and I was r
eminded of how perfectly her body was made for mine. Not that I’d forgotten.
This was what I imagined someone felt like when stranded on a deserted island, dreaming about all the food they wished they had. I’d been trapped on my own personal island of hell, wishing she were next to me so many nights, and now that she was within my grasp, and letting me touch her, it was going to take all my self-control to not lay her out on any available flat surface.
I heard the unmistakable sounds of footfalls and turned to see Kalli walking toward me, smiling brightly. I hadn’t seen her since Wednesday, but we’d been texting nonstop. I knew if I went to her my self-control would be tested, and I didn’t want to put either of us in that situation. I wanted the exact moment I was having then: Kalli, without worry lines marring her beautiful face, walking toward me looking happy, radiant, and sexy as fucking hell.
Her blonde hair cascaded over her shoulder in a thick, loose, crazy braid. She wore a long sweater that looked to be a dress, as it came down to the middle of her thighs. It was a deep maroon color and was slouching off one of her shoulders, giving me a peek at her collarbone. She wore black leggings that disappeared into the black boots, which were currently making the clacking noises.
She looked incredible. She looked like she was ready to curl up on a couch and read a book, or curl into my side and watch a movie. Perhaps she’d purposefully made herself look soft and comfortable. Either way, it worked. I wanted to feel the sweater under my hands, and I needed to feel it bunching as I slid it up her torso and pulled it over her head.
“Hey,” I said through the smile that wouldn’t leave my face. She continued toward me, but didn’t respond. She did, however, walk confidently to me, not stopping until her hand was at my cheek and her lips were pressed against mine. I was surprised by her approach, but only let a second pass before I engaged in the kiss. My hand found the back of her neck, loving the feel of her silky hair wound between my fingers, and I gave her a firm squeeze there.
“Hey, yourself,” she said with a smirk after pulling away.
“You ready to go?” I asked, as my eyes took their time wandering down her body. The top she was wearing was meant to be loose and baggy, but I knew what curves lay beneath it and the façade drove me mad.
“Yup,” she said, smiling as she swung her keyring around on one finger. She turned and walked to the back of her Rover, opening the trunk to allow me to place my duffle bag inside. Once the trunk was closed, I held my hand out to her.
“Keys.”
Her forehead scrunched in confusion, eyebrows drawing together. It was adorable. “You’re not driving my Rover.”
“Babe, when’s the last time you drove through San Francisco? It’ll be easier if you just let me drive. It’ll be late by the time we get there anyway, and dark.”
“I can drive in the dark, Riot. I’ve been driving myself all over the west coast for years. You just want to drive my Rover.”
“You’re not wrong. Come on, babe,” I moved closer to her, wrapping my arms around her waist. “I just want to drive my girl home and hold her hand.” I blinked down at her, using some overly exaggerated pouty lips and batting my eyelashes. It was over the top and I knew I looked ridiculous, but I also knew it would work.
“Fine,” she groaned, pulling away and slapping her keys in my hand. “But if you’re driving, I get to pick the music.”
“Deal,” I said, dropping a kiss on her lips, enjoying the way I could feel her smile against my mouth. I walked her to the passenger side, opened her door, and watched her climb in.
When we were on the road, music selected, her hand loosely gripping mine, it was as if we were finally back to normal. Finally back to a place where there weren’t dark clouds hanging over us, or guilt. I knew there would be many instances in our future where Kalli had setbacks, or bad days where Marcus would be at the front of her mind and she’d need me to hold her, or tell her funny memories I had of him and the few days I was lucky enough to spend with him, but for now she was happy.
We fought our way out of LA traffic and started climbing the grapevine, which was essentially a ridiculously large, tall, and windy road that went over a mountain. It was dry and a brownish-red color in the day, but with the sun already set, all we could see were the lights of the other cars on the road.
“I have a question,” Kalli finally said, breaking our comfortable silence. “I thought your sister worked on a cruise ship? What is she doing in town?”
“Well, that’s kind of why my parents’ house is full. Halah came home for vacation and it just happened to be during her birthday. She hasn’t been home in over two years, so my parents are throwing her a party. There’s family coming in from out of town.”
“So, I’m not just meeting your immediate family?” she asked nervously.
“No, babe, sorry. You’re pretty much going to meet every family member I have who lives west of the Mississippi. Which is pretty much all of them.”
“Are any of your family members from Lebanon going to be there?”
I shook my head. “No, we don’t really see the family who’s left there. It’s mostly distant relatives now, as my grandparents have both passed away. But my mom’s sister will be there. She lives in Montana. Seems my mother and her sister both fell for American men.”
“I can’t wait to meet your parents. I mean, I’m nervous, but from what you’ve told me about the way they met, they seem like people from a fairy tale. And I bet your mother is just beautiful.”
Kalli was looking out her window, but her voice was wistful and genuine. I couldn’t imagine what it would be like to lose your mother at such a young age, and I wanted her to feel like my family was her family.
“They’re going to love you,” I said, bringing the back of her hand up to my mouth and pressing a kiss against it. I wanted to tell her I loved her, too, to make sure she knew it, but I didn’t push it. We were just getting back to being comfortable with each other, and I didn’t need to ruin it by moving too quickly with her. She gave me her beautiful, carefree smile, but then turned back to the window.
When we drove through San Francisco proper, I was glad I’d forced her to let me drive. Her eyes were wide, taking in all the lights of the city. I wanted to stare at her, watch as she took in the beauty of the city skyline. I’d seen the city a thousand times, but it was all brand new watching it through her eyes.
We headed north through the city and I took a few opportunities to point out special places you could see from the freeway; places that had relevance to a special time in my life or a specific occasion.
“Before we head back home I want to take you to the pier.”
“That’s one place I’ve never been able to see when I’ve been here.”
“Well, then it’s settled.” We drove in silence for a few more minutes. “Okay, so, I have reservations for us at the Palace Hotel, but my mom was hoping we could stop by her house before we check-in for the night.” I turned my head for just a moment to look at her, hopeful she’d agree. I wanted nothing more than to introduce her to my family, to make her real in that way, make our relationship that much more solid.
“Riot, it’s almost ten. Won’t your family be asleep?”
I gave her a grin. “When you get my whole family together, they’re a little rowdy. Especially with Halah home. They’ll be up.” I winked at her, trying to ease her apprehension.
“I’d love to meet them.”
I kissed her hand again, unable to stop myself.
A minute later we were driving over the Golden Gate Bridge.
“This is so beautiful, Riot,” she said in an almost whisper.
“It is,” I agreed, but couldn’t take my eyes off her.
Forty minutes later she read the road sign alerting her to my hometown.
“You grew up in Sausalito?” Her voice was high and she sounded astonished.
“I did. Well, just outside it in Muir Beach.”
I had barely gotten Kalli out of the Rover
before the front door opened and my mother’s voice rang out into the night.
“Riot Bentley, you’d better get up here and give your mother a hug. And bring your beautiful girlfriend with you.”
“You ready for this?” I asked Kalli, bringing my face just a breath away from hers.
“Ready when you are,” she replied, sounding just a little nervous.
“They already love you,” I whispered, just before I pressed a small, chaste kiss against her lips. I took her hand and walked her to the porch where my mother stood, just as breathtaking as she always had been. If Halah aged even half as beautifully as my mother, the man in her life would be the envy of all his friends.
“My baby.” My mother held my face between her hands and pressed a kiss to each cheek. “You move away from home and you never come back to visit.”
“Sorry, Ma.” I took a step back and wrapped my arm around Kalli’s waist. “Ma, this is my girlfriend, Kalli Rivers. Kal, this is my mom, Samarah Bentley.”
“It is so good to finally meet you, my sweet girl.” I watched as my mother wrapped Kalli in a tight and familiar hug. Kalli stiffened at first, but then I watched as she melted into my mother’s embrace, and nearly hugged my mother again when she winked at me over Kalli’s shoulder.
“I’m glad to meet you too,” Kal said as they pulled apart.
“Mara, are you holding those kids hostage out there?” I heard my father’s deep voice call from the house.
“Your father is anxious to see you,” Ma said, urging us into the house. I took Kal’s hand and led her into my childhood home. I’d never brought a girl home before, so even though I didn’t want to stress Kalli out with that bit of information, this was kind of a big deal for my family. Halah had brought a few guys home to meet our parents, but life was different on a cruise ship. It seemed like she fell in and out of really intense relationships quite frequently. I guess when you’re forced to live on a boat with someone, normal dating timelines go out the window.
Never Tied Down (The Never Duet Book 2) Page 9
